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2nd blog of day:did something hard but good

Monday, June 24, 2013

Yesterday was a great day.
Last year, a month before we lost our baby at five months gestation, my neighbour and her husband lost thiers seven months in. It was heartbreaking, and this had been their first pregnancy. It seemed so unfair.
Yesterday, my good friend went to see them in the hospital to welcome their beautiful new baby girl! And I went along:)
It was so good to step into that hospital for a new life! It was so good to see my friend, who had a rough delivery and had developed complications, and to be able to let her tell her birth story, and get her a blanket:)
We went up to the nicu and saw baby, she was so tiny and perfect!i stroked her teeny foot. My girlfriend and I laughed when I realized she was exactly half the size of my firstborn of 10lbs 5oz lol!
I made it all the way to the elevator and then my gf asked me if I was alright. Then I started to tear up. I'm glad that I didnt show that side and put my own damper on a beautiful moment for this little new family. I am proud that instead of just feeling wistful for my own newborn, I actually felt excitement for them, and a sense of peace in myself, and that I had the courage to show my support. I hope I did! It was a great day, a hard one too, but good for the soul.

  
  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

ROSAMARCELLE 6/26/2013 9:31AM

    It must be so hard. emoticon

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MOTHEPRO 6/25/2013 6:21AM

    emoticon

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SHARON10002 6/24/2013 10:16PM

    emoticon emoticon emoticon emoticon emoticon emoticon emoticon emoticon emoticon emoticon emoticon emoticon
I know that took a lot of courage on your part, April. That is proof that you are healing. How wonderful that you could be there for her, and allow yourself to share her happiness in that moment. I am so proud of you, my friend.
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Comment edited on: 6/24/2013 10:17:46 PM

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3G1RLS4ME 6/24/2013 7:46PM

    That's one of the hardest parts you were very strong today emoticon

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VLINDER2014 6/24/2013 7:30PM

    Hugs and much love my strong friend.. You are beautiful and Strong ... Sorrow is never easy ..sounds like you handled yours with grace... love for your friend and sorrow near your heart .. but Joy in a new life is never bad...

love ,
Dawn

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KALISWALKER 6/24/2013 1:29PM

    emoticon

I can understand, a happy sad time.

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5k colour walk run

Monday, June 24, 2013

Ok I did it! Its been almost a year and a half since I stopped running, and Friday I got back at 'er with my friends in a run for our new swimming pool. We wore white and got splashed with coloured powders.
I am still suffering from a nasty lingering cold. I thought seriously about laying low. I didn't feel very well while doing the run. But afterwards? I felt soooo much better! That "got back on the horse" feeling.
It was hard going with others. I realized I had only run solo before! I ran with myself and my thoughts, at my pace, not talking, and it was akin to meditation. This was different.
My one friend is about half my size. She expected me to go bouncing down the road with her. I found it a bit embarassing when I was huffing and puffing after 45 seconds. I brought my iphone and did intervals. I really, really enjoy doing it that way. If there are 15 seconds to go and my thighs are burning, I can push myself! My other friend just dropped 27lbs in two and a half months, and here is why-her four year old fell into our local river and drowned. I dont know her extremely well, but I can say I was honored to be huffing and puffing with her:)
My bouncing tiny friend kept asking if it was okay to run ahead. We kept saying go for it. But inside I was feeling a plethora of negatives! I was chastizing myself for letting my running stamina drop off the edge of the earth. All that hard work! I thought about where I was before the losses of my babies last year, and that brought up more hard feelings! I realized I really am a slow runner. I wonder if my pace will lengthen out over time? Sometimes I am more of a slow shuffler, and that is how I keep moving forward lol!
Anyways, I tried hard to look at the gorgeous green fields, the blue sky, the colorful people, the happy little kids who will be swimming in their new pool in a month or two. I told myself its great to be able to shuffle! At the very least I am moving forward.
All I can do is take this feeling of excitement I have towards running, and sparking, and finding my best self and take the next steps! I can retrain my body to run again. Three times a week! And my little friend wants to try running together at least once a week. I am now not that certain it will work:( i didnt realize I had a competitive streak in me, but when she couldnt stop telling people all night how much energy she had and how she had to run ahead of us, I really felt upset! But hey, cant beat em? Join em, right? She can slow down and I can catch up over time. Maybe thats what I need, a bouncing bunny friend to spur me on lol;)

  
  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

LAURIETAIT 7/5/2013 2:31PM

    I have been wanting to do a colour run. They look like so much fun. Don't be so hard on yourself.I think the important thing is that you are moving. The stamina will return. and the speed will pick up.
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_VALEO_ 6/25/2013 3:42PM

    If you want to go running with me, you'd better be prepared to walk a lot! emoticon

You seem to be doing just fine and you have all it takes to run, even the running high. Keep up the training and the huffing and puffing will be history!

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IDICEM 6/24/2013 11:45AM

  Congratulations on getting started again. I love your excitement for running. emoticon emoticon emoticon

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Help! Feeling bummed

Wednesday, May 22, 2013

Ok, I've been around here long enough to know the scale doesn't tell you everything and we shouldn't obsess. But I am really frustrated!!!
I do weigh myself every day, first thing in the morning. I find it keeps me motivated to stick to my plans. In the past I've had good success doing this.
But something is up with my body and I don't know what. Typically, I do not see huge swings in my weight. A pound to a pound and a half is my norm, and I know not to freak.
Im in week three of eating clean. I am not sure if my body is liking it this time! Or maybe its detoxing still? I feel horribly pouffy, my tummy is big, everything feels bigger instead of smaller!
I am drinking my water- at least ten cups a day. I am working out-this week has been chock full of long labouring days building a retaining wall, digging up rock hard clay, shovelling dirt, chasing kids, woodworking, wheelbarrow loads, and a kickass strength routine. Is it too much? Is my body in shock?
I know I should be patient.
But jeeeze, it takes me what seems like a long time to lose a pound but I can see a gain that doesn't disappear overnight. And that is whats happening now! Up another pound, two days in a row.
I read yesterday that most people starting an exercise and eating regimen for weight loss actually see a weight gain on average of three to four pounds in the first month. This is the reason a lot of people quit! I'm not quitting, but even knowing this,I feel discouraged anyways. And confused!
I wish I had a magic machine that could tell me -hey, you're gaining muscle, relax. Or lets go for a walk, you need to burn x off.... I have been within my limits all week.
Has anyone else been here before? I started last challenge at 218. I started this one at 222. I'm at 225 and that five percent feels a loooong way off to me right now:(
I am trying to be patient, but it ain't working, sparkfriends.

  
  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

SHARON10002 6/12/2013 11:43PM

    Lots of good advice here. I agree that muscle weighs more than fat. With all you've been doing, I'm sure that's what's happening. You are focused on doing all of the right things. Stress can play a big part in this too.
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Comment edited on: 6/12/2013 11:44:09 PM

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LITTLE_MCTURTLE 5/23/2013 4:44PM

    Do you notice that you're not as tired at the end of the day or that you can do the work more easily? Maybe you can use that as a measure of your success? Or you could check your measurements, my guess would be you've lost some inches overall. I know how frustrating it is when the scale doesn't reflect your effort, but it will eventually. emoticon

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AMANDEES76 5/23/2013 1:05PM

    My guess is that you are building muscle and that is where you are seeing the gain. It does take a while sometimes for your body to catch up to where you want it to be. I have been having the same problem lately, last week I had a 2.5 lb. gain in one day and then it took at least 5 days to really see it drop back down. Are you getting enough protein in your clean diet? I have added hard boiled eggs and string cheese into my daily plan to try and increase my protein because that is where I struggle the most.

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ROCKYRD1 5/23/2013 3:27AM

    What is your salt intake like. Allergies, Fiber?

I find too much salt and my thumb ring is tight - the rest of the time I can shake my hand and it will almost fall off.

Also carbs in the evening are a killer for me - Next morning I am bloated. emoticon

Anyway you know in your heart you are doing healthy things emoticon . Also I am a great believer that your body doesnt instantly react to the changes we make - that there is a bit of a lag.





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TAMMERIAN 5/22/2013 2:16PM

    Sounds to me like you are doing a great job on your fitness. Just stick with it and you will get those results.

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APRILAUTUMN1 5/22/2013 11:24AM

    Thank you everyone, I really just needed to hear others have experienced this too, and the pep talks! That helps me to keep pushing:)
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FREES1 5/22/2013 11:04AM

    keep the faith! your body just might be confused and trying to stay in control.. maybe 10 cups of water is more than it can handle, especially if you've added a lot of veggies and fruit which contain their own fluids.. maybe hold off on the daily weighing??
hang in there - hopefully your body will realize all is well and let it all go!

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GOSPELCLOWN 5/22/2013 11:02AM

    All that work is resulting in MUSCLE! Soon you will see a nice toned set of arms or your legs will have more endurance... Muscle is heavier than fat.

Cut yourself some slack. You KNOW you are on the right path.

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GOANNA2 5/22/2013 10:41AM

    Don't freak out and don't give up. I hope you are having
a break between gym workpouts. Maybe you are building
muscle. Hang in there.

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PENNYSAVER2 5/22/2013 10:25AM

    emoticon Continue being kind to your body. The results will show up eventually. Remember, you are more than a number on the scale.

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KEELIE21 5/22/2013 9:02AM

    Even though you are freaking out it sounds like you know all the weird little facts about weight loss we all hate lol Now you just have to breathe and start to BELIEVE them. Sounds like all your activity is definitely muscle building, which weighs more than fat. I go forever with out losing then one day I'll be down 3 lbs! You've got this don't worry
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RUNNINGOMA 5/22/2013 8:57AM

    When you track your food, are you in all your ranges? Maybe you want to up your protein since you are doing a lot of weight lifting type of work.
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TERRY0217 5/22/2013 6:46AM

    Don't give up! when I started working out at the gym, I gained 5 lbs, even though I was eating better...Your body is replacing fat with muscle...getting used to your new food choices (my body went into shock! where's the sugar, where's the cookies?) Keep doing what you're doing, and before you know it, the scale will start moving...Best of luck to you emoticon

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GBSLIM 5/22/2013 6:09AM

    I see that you are doing A LOT of heavy work with the landscaping....you will have to check spark resources for the details or perhaps another sparker will respond with the details but... I believe your muscles retain water when they have been put through their paces. I did an excellent ST workout one day before a TOPS meeting weigh in. Boy was THAT a mistake.
Make a list of all your accomplishments. I bet it's AWESOME! Maybe the scale isn't moving and you're feeling bad but remember nothing stays the same for long.
emoticon and when the change comes it'll all be good :)
Best of Luck to you. emoticon

Comment edited on: 5/22/2013 6:11:09 AM

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BLUEROSE73 5/22/2013 4:02AM

    I hate that feeling. Just keep doing what you know is right - balancing calories in and out. It will work out. I know my body goes a little haywire during TOM. it' really sucks - all the bloating, etc.

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KALISWALKER 5/22/2013 1:43AM

    Focus on doing the right things, and losing weight is something that happens along the way. When you know you are doing the right things, be patient and the weight loss will happen. I see you weigh daily and I do that too (can't seem to stop). Know you are on the path to success, and you will get there.

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Insanity oxygen and toddlers;)

Friday, May 17, 2013

I finally found a fitness program I like. Now I am setting to the task of beginning it! I've been doing yardwork and playing with the kids and walking for my minutes in the Spring 5% challenge. I have been clean eating for two weeks straight now! I have also been on track all week for calorie limits. I was really dissapointed to find myself feeling heavier than ever! Seriously, I am puffed up and retaining water. I weighed myself this morning and yes, I weigh more instead of less. I haven't been overeating, or eating too much salt, etc. It would be really nice to feel skinnier, and see a drop in weight.
I did a little research-its most likely my body purging toxins, maybe adding muscle, repairing at least. I will keep drinking more water, keep doing what I'm doing, cause this meat can't hang onto my bones forever!
I feel proud for starting Oxygen's Your Best Body plan. The first month is all weight bearing exercise I can do at home, without equipment. I have been searching for awhile for a strength training routine that fit for me. I need to start somewhere!
It was an ugly morning in my house-the kids were dying to go outside early, but I told them no! Mommy has to exercise! I kept trying to find time for myself away from them to do this, but I haven't been able to, so guess what? Morning in the livingroom on my yoga mat, wall and couch(for incline pushups, not sitting) it is.
I had to stop between sets for snacks, a poopy bum, a fight. My daughter went to her room for awhile-she has really been testing me lately! At one point, i had a little cry. Today is the anniversary of my Angel baby's birth, and I wanted to do something for me! Three quarters of the way thru, my kids started doing crunches with me. Instead of fighting it, they were getting on board! At the end, during a quickie cardio burn, my daughter brought out sparkly headbands for all of us and everyone was doing jumping jacks and speedskaters lol!
I hope we all get something out of this!
Sometimes life is hard, and there are obstacles to overcome. But what a gift it is to be able to work towards your best self, and bring those you love along on the journey:)

  
  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

SHARON10002 5/20/2013 10:37PM

    emoticon Thoughts are with you . . . Good for you sticking with doing whatever exercise you can! You are going to get those little ones on the path to a healthy lifestyle! I'm sure there was much laughter involved, too! How can you not laugh seeing them want to imitate mommy?! Keep doing what you're doing, April. You may not see the scale move, but there will definitely be some NSVs!

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LAURIETAIT 5/19/2013 6:12PM

    Awesome! Your great example is making a difference for your kids. Plus you get the added bonus of sharing time with them while you exercise. That's a win/win.
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ROSAMARCELLE 5/19/2013 3:58PM

    It isn't easy to find the time with a houseful of children - been there, done that, but well done for getting them on board. Good luck with the Oxygen's your best Body Plan. Let us know how it goes.
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3G1RLS4ME 5/18/2013 10:01AM

    Happy birthday to your angel in heaven maybe light a candle in her honor and sing her happy birthday, that's what I do every December 4 th. good job for getting in a workout and the clean eating! It'll come off dont worry here in TJ we eat nopal to help with weight loss

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BLUEROSE73 5/18/2013 9:46AM

    I am glad you are not giving up on doing this. Yes, our bodys can react in a strange way on the scale to begin with. You will get there, Just keep going

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GOANNA2 5/18/2013 7:47AM

    Great to see your kids joined in with you. Don't beat
yourself up about weight. You could weigh yourself
10 times in a day and you'd get a different weight
every time. Hang in htere. You are doing great. emoticon

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AMANDEES76 5/18/2013 2:14AM

    It sounds like a crazy kind of love you day!!!! Kids are funny in how they will copy everything you do so keep exercising and they are learning a lifelong healthy lifestyle!!!

You did great this week on the 5% Challenge and the Shooting stars are proud to call you a member!!!

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YB0511 5/17/2013 10:47PM

    Sounds like you are motivated and doing great. emoticon

emoticon for your loss.

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KALISWALKER 5/17/2013 8:52PM

    Glad to hear you are motivating your kids to join you in exercise.

emoticon for you sadness today. I know how you must feel, I had a loss too.

Whatever caused your weight issue is temporary, keep doing what you are doing and you will have nice outcome on the scale.

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Mango pineapple smoothies and clean birthday breakfasts

Monday, May 13, 2013

Soooooo today is hubby's birthday. What do you get/make for the man who doesn't want anything ever, Christmases and birthdays included?
How about sneaky healthy breakfasts he can grab and go?
Mama always said the way to a man's heart....... Heheh
I am making him a brekkie menu he can pick from. I shopped for all the ingredients this weekend so I am ready for whatever he chooses!
Yes, this is an attempt to get him eating healthier-the breakfast burritos he has been nuking are sooooo full of not-good stuff:( its also my way of saying "im sorry I don't wake up at the crack of dawn with you and cook, honey!" I am absolutely not a morning person whatsoever!
But I am betting he will like his options:

Cheesy Potato Frittata emoticon emoticon

Banana Cream Cheese French Toast emoticon emoticon

Pecan Sticky Buns emoticon emoticon

Blueberry Crumble Muffins emoticon emoticon

All clean eating recipes, can you believe? Although, I won't be mentioning that.... emoticon

I am flying solo today-off the meal plan due to a birthday bbq dinner. But I have managed to stay on track and eat clean anyways, which feels good! It could be easy for me to say screw it, the entire day is a "cheat day". But no! I mean to be successful and I intend to get rid of that all-or-nothing attitude with small steady steps towards my goals!
I just made mango pineapple smoothies with rice milk, a tsp of crystallized ginger and fresh mint to quell my sugary treat cravings. The kids enjoyed them too.
Happy sparking!





  
  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

ROCKYRD1 5/15/2013 3:45AM

    I really like the sound of those smoothies - I am going to have to give them a go. I hope you both have a great day

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AMANDEES76 5/14/2013 1:05AM

    I like your plan for hubby's birthday!!! Giving them healthy choices that are as good as the ones you listed are hard to say no to. The smoothies sounds great too.

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SHARON10002 5/13/2013 10:47PM

    Now all he has to do is to make it for himself! LOL!!! Hope he liked his birthday dinner! Way to go on sticking to your plan!!!! emoticon

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