ANNIEONTHEFLY's Recent Blog Entries

Proud owner...

Thursday, January 29, 2009

of my "new" '04 Dyna! emoticon

I'm getting comfortable on it and it's a real sweet ride. This has been a lifelong goal, and I'm still in awe that I really made it!

  Member Comments About This Blog Post:


    Happy you got your Harley but I'm most happy at the healthy person smiling at us in the picture :) Keep up the good work girl emoticon


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SUGEO1 1/30/2009 8:01AM

    Sweet! Congratulations on the Harley and on the goal weight. I got my Harley E-Glide back in July and I'm still loving it. Like you, owning a Harley is a dream come true.

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NASCARGIRL3 1/29/2009 10:26PM

    Congratulations. When I first got my Harley I used to go in the garage and just sit on it. LOL I'd go down and make sure it was OK before I went to bed at night. Owning a Harley is a life long dream of many people, congrats on reaching one of your goals. ~Wendy

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I bought my "Dream Bike" !

Friday, January 23, 2009

I've waited a long time for this, saved all my pennies, and my dream has finally come true! emoticon

I have a Harley Davidson, of my very own, sitting downstairs in the garage! emoticon

It's a 2004 Dyna Super Glide in pristine condition, low miles (7500), always garaged, always serviced at Harley Davidson dealerships, and "box stock", but for the Stage 1 Kit and V&H Long Shot pipes. It came with all the "extras" I wanted; a windshield, crash bars and bags. It's "Johnny Cash" black, with forward controls, so I can stretch out my long legs in comfort, and it's the perfect "ladies bike". I can hardly wait to take pics and post them!

I've only been out on it twice so far, but we've been having some rain lately, and I don't ride on wet pavement. I'm just so *incredibly* happy to be off my old, "learner" Honda Silverwing I've ridden for the last 3.5 years. BTW, the Honda's for sale now. emoticon

Life is so good these days, I just don't want the "bubble" to burst! emoticon

I've gotten my weight up so I can handle the bigger bike now, and Junior is doing fantastic!

Thank you, my friends, for all your love and support. emoticon

  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

SEADOG49 2/10/2009 12:32PM

    Nice bike, congratulations

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VELVETSAPPHIRE 1/24/2009 10:34AM

    Life is good !! Keep smiling dear and enjoy. The blessings just keep coming but you've worked hard for them. The main thing is you are a success story !!!

LUV U dear friend
Carol emoticon

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I'm finally at a healthy weight!

Monday, January 19, 2009

I don't know exactly how much I weigh, but I know it's good, because my clothes finally fit again! I'm back in my 7's and 9's! emoticon I hung a pair of my old size 3/4 jeans on my wall as a reminder to keep up the healthy eating habits and to never to let my ED gain control of my life again. The ED still "talks" to me occasionally, but I refuse to listen! I've promised myself never to relapse again, and I'm getting so many complements on looking healthy, my self-esteem is just sky high! emoticon I had to spend 20 days in the hospital between Sept & Oct '08 to get here, but with all of the the doctor's and the nurse's encouragement, I learned to eat again! God Bless all of them. I will never forget, and always appreciate, how much they helped me.

Sad news. Cody passed away Oct 22, '08 from heart and respiratory failure. We knew he had cardiac myopathy and an inoperable mass partially blocking his airway, so we had him on medication for the last few months of his life, to give him a little more quality time with us. I'll never forget how during his last heart attack, he used the last of his strength to come to me before he finally collapsed. I could see how scared he was, but all I could do was cuddle with him, try to comfort him, tell how much I loved him, and how much I always will. Cody passed away in my arms. I can only take comfort, for myself, in the fact that Cody will never have an irregular heartbeat or trouble breathing again. Cody is peacefully at rest, and I have 15 years of loving memories that I would never trade for anything in this world. God Bless you, Cody. Rest in Peace my loving friend. You may be gone from this life, but you will never be forgotten. You are my forever angel. emoticon

Glad news. Last night I rode Junior for the first time in 20 months! Junior suffered a serious injury in May '07. He somehow managed to tear a suspensory at the navicular level in his right front. Everybody at my barn was talking behind my back, and to my face, telling me I should put him down, but I refused. Junior has too much "heart" for me to just give up on him like that. UC Davis requires that you make an appointment 72 hours in advance before they will see your horse in their clinic. I made the appt on the 7th day of his lameness. By the 10th day, he was on 3 legs, but I gently trailered him the 100 miles to get him there anyway. Junior spent 10 days in their hospital, while I camped in my horse trailer in the parking lot. The vets kept telling me to go home and get some rest, but I refused to leave Junior behind. His injury remained undiagnosed for 8 days, while they did everything they could for him, but he never lost his good humor, or his appetite! They finally did a CAT scan on the 9th day, even though they knew I couldn't afford it, but they considered him a "good teaching case", so they did it anyway. They found the injury, surgically repaired the tendon, and discharged him on the 11th morning, with lots of rehab instructions for me! Anyway, last night he was looking so good at the walk, I took a chance and hopped on him bareback, to see if I could feel anything. Junior happily walked out sound, just like he wanted to get back to work! emoticon I've never been so happy in my life! He's still a little "off" at the jog, but time, and good care got him this far, and I've never lost faith that he would come back, at least, "serviceably" sound for me. So, I'm getting his saddle out of storage, and we're gonna carefully start going for "real" walks! He's finally past just hand walking! Hooray for Junior, my "Bitty Boy"! (He's really 16h, I just call him "Bitty Boy" and "Bits" as a nickname. Even "Junior" is a nickname. His registered name is "Imagine The Best".)

So, as life goes on, I'm feeling like I'm in a really good place, and I'm very happy to be here! emoticon

  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

VELVETSAPPHIRE 1/19/2009 10:47PM

    First let me say how sorry I am to hear about Cody but I'm glad you could be with him when his time came and that he gave you so much love in the time you were together. Really glad to hear Bits is doing so well and hope that will continue.

Sorry to hear you were in the hospital but so thankful you came through ok and were able to get the help you needed to get on the right road. Life isn't easy sometimes but you have weathered the storm and it's good to hear you are doing so well. Hang in there and know you can do this for the rest of your life. Life is good !!! emoticon emoticon


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I'm looking "healthy"!

Sunday, August 31, 2008

Since May I went ahead and bought a scale and I've been watching the numbers go up slowly. I got up past 128# and am now running at 130-132#. I'm feeling good, eating solid food again and drinking lots of Ensure protein shakes to keep my calorie intake up. I'm stronger and I've lost that "concentration camp" starvation look. I know I'm looking better and I just plain feel better about myself.
Even though the scale was kind of a "no-no" for someone like me, I'm glad I bought it. It's measuring my success, hooray!

  Member Comments About This Blog Post:


    You go, Girl! The concentration camp look is only for supermodels for nutty designers. Congrats on the healthier looking you!

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    Hi there emoticon

Long time since I've written and I do apologize but saw this in my email and had to come over and see what you had to share. I am so happy to hear you are doing so well and have gotten healthy again emoticon I know there have been times it has been difficult for you but you stuck with it and you saw success and that is what is so important.

I've not been on the computer much the last few months because of health problems so do apologize for not checking on you. Take care and keep up the great work. You are an encouragement to all of us as we work to reach our goals.

Carol emoticon

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I've gained a little weight ! :)

Saturday, May 03, 2008

I'm determined to see if I can recover. I'm tired om my life being one long relapse after another. This time I didn't even realize I was starving myself again, but all I was doing was drinking Coke all the time instead of eating. I was getting enough sugar and caffeine to keep me going, but no nutrition. emoticon

Somehow, I managed to look objectively in a mirror. I realized I was suffering from malnutrition and told my NP when I was being checked out for the tylenol overdose. She's working on getting my health plan to authorize nutritional supplements. She's also working on referring me to a nutritionist.

I found a therapist who specializes in ed's through my health plan. I meet with her on May 9th. I'm scared of giving up what I've lived with and found comfort in for so long. But, I have a quote from another lady I wrote on a white board next to my front door, "Feel The Fear, But Do It Anyway - Hope", that inspires me to keep going.

I gave up the Coke, and boy did I have a caffeine withdrawl headach for about 5 days ! I've substituted with protein shakes, smoothies and organic juices. I can already see the difference in less than a month! My tummy has filled out and my hipbones don't protrude as much as before. I've been living on a liquid diet, but I'm starting to be able to eat a little dinner at night even though it hurts. I know I need to push through this though, because I know that I need to start eating again.

I threw out my scale years ago because I had a tendency to get too competitive with the numbers. My last weigh-in was 16 days ago, at 118. My NP would like to see me at 128. I'm seriously thinking about buying a scale so I can track my weight gain, so I'll know when to lay off all the extra calories. My only fear is that I may become competitive again once I get to 128 and refuse to go over that number. I'm 5'8" and 128 is within a "normal" weight range. I think I'm being logical about all this... emoticon

  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

CHILIPANTS 5/5/2008 9:44PM

    keep striving!! you can get there and you can live the better life!

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LEGGYLADY 5/4/2008 2:15PM

    Congrats on getting healthier!

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JOHANINO 5/4/2008 10:20AM

    See baby steps. You are finally getting help and well done you for reaching out. You can do this. If you're a no scale person though take folks advice on board and don't buy one. Get weighed @ the NP's. Scales can be like idols and that's a bad thing. Not least for us with ED's.



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FATKAT28 5/3/2008 9:24PM

    Hi , my name is kadee , I've had ana/mia for 10 1/2 years. I've been in recovery for about 10 months. I was able to go to out patient treatment and was very successful. I just wanted to say I know exactly what your going through know its hard but if you by a scale you are going to back slide even more(scales and eating disorders are a no no ) You also mentioned that you are 5'8 and 118 that is very unhealthy, 128 sounds like a great healthy goal for your height. I thought that i would die somewhere in a hospital bed being fed through a tube. I made one final decision that i wanted to live.......then treatment worked for me. You can recover if you out your mind to it and your heart , good luck

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    Hi dear,

Even though my problem is totally the opposite of yours, I do hear you loud and cloud. I know you are going to do this, though, and have told you why so hang in there and take it a day at a time. If you don't want the scales in your house, go to the NPs once a month and weigh yourself, just so you still have a handle on how GREAT you are doing :)

Keep up the good work and thanks for being such an inspiration to the rest of us as we all strive to get healthier emoticon We are planting flowers but I had to come in and rest my feet and legs and decided to put my time to good use as I sat here :) Will email later if we aren't too busy (or I'm not too exhausted emoticon emoticon Keep smiling

Carol :)

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