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ANGIE_JCFD520's Recent Blog Entries

Oh My....

Wednesday, June 29, 2011

I was doing so well with my eating before we went on vacation. Then we went on vacation and bought bags and bags of M&Ms....and other great foods like Pudgy Pies. And we took pictures.....
Today I downloaded those pictures and almost cried. I looked like my butt needed a "Wide Load" sign. I guess my husband is right (don't tell him I said that. LOL) The mirror lies to you but the camera doesn't. How could I not know I had that many rolls....and chipmonk cheeks. And Why, oh WHY, did I think I still had too many stomach rolls when I weighed 160???? Oh my....why do I feel like eating a huge bag of M&M's now. Ha ha. I need to pull myself up and start riding my bike at the campground and swim even if I think the water is cold. LOL But most of all, I need to eat only when I'm hungry and not when the food sounds good...why do I do that? Why did I allow myself to gain this much weight? Why does it have to be so hard?
I know...I know, I need to pick myself up and dust off my "Wide Load" butt and keep moving.

  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

NEZAB24 7/12/2011 8:38AM

    You know Angie it is all in the mind set. So brush off and get fighting mad and go for it again. I know you can do this. And remember it takes time and dedication. Remember how dedicated we were when we first joined? Have to get that mind set back! I'm rooting for you girlfriend.

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WYOKATHERINE 7/2/2011 1:39PM

    Angie just remember how good you felt when you were eating right, you can get right back on that wagon. I had read Jan's post where she came home with lots of fruits and vegies so today I went shopping and did the same thing. Skipped the donuts (which I always buy for the "boys" ;) I really tried not to buy anything that I would eat that is sweet. So I know you can do the same. You are worth it!!!!

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MDBUTTERFLY 6/30/2011 7:35PM

    You have plenty of us to keep you company so come on...dust off and lets get going! =)

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ASKILLMAN 6/29/2011 10:34PM

    You acknowledged your mistakes, you know how to make it right, now put it in action! You sound like you're on a mission, and I bet you'll see those "rolls" disappearing sooner rather than later! emoticon

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SUZNESS 6/29/2011 10:32PM

    You know it is funny....we start this journey to health all excited and motivated then we get busy with life and the excitement and motivation fades....Boy, if only we treated each and every day as if it were day one! All of us are prone to temptations and frustrations. All of us struggle with what we WANT versus what we NEED. You are NOT ALONE! And I got you beat on rolls girl! Trust me!

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The Good, the Bad, and the Ugly

Saturday, June 04, 2011

Well, last night I did something bad....I sat in front of the TV and ate way too much! I have found that if I get a good idea for somewhat healthy snacks (crackers and lite laughing cow cheese, whole wheat English muffins and lite strawberry cream cheese, and other baked snacks) that I can not buy them ALL in the same shopping trip. LOL So, I ate over my calorie range by probably 200 cals. But, the good thing is that my stomach did not feel so good, hopefully I can stop myself the next time my brain is craving the foods! And, even better, I didn't throw in the towel today....I picked myself up and had a great day.

Today I:
Cleaned the camper awning (that took at least an hours worth of scrubbing!), cleaned out the bed of the truck and sprayed it with a hose so we can pack it for our camping trip, boxed up 95% of the garage sale items after the sale ended and took 4 boxes of stuff to Goodwill instead of saving it for the next garage sale. And I cleaned out the cooler and my portable Coleman grill. Thankfully the kids were a BIG help today. I was so tired that I told them we would go out for supper since we were taking the boxes to Goodwill and the kids chose Subway. :) So I had my sub and brought my baked chips home for tomorrow. Then we went and did a bit of shopping and I treated us all to ice cream cones. I still have to look up the cals in it, but my day should still be within my range!

So, last night might have been ugly, but I picked myself up and didn't let it bother me! PLUS, I haven't had any pop (Dt. Pepsi or Dt Sprite) in 5 days! And today I had one piece of first in at least 5 day. So, I'm feeling pretty good right now (as long as I don't look in the mirror. LOL

  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

SUZNESS 6/5/2011 6:37AM

    WOW! Your day sounds great! I am really proud of you! I was JUST sitting here checking email instead of doing a few morning exercises and you know what?....I'm gonna go get those exercises done! Thanks for the encouragement!

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MDBUTTERFLY 6/4/2011 10:07PM

    Good for you on picking yourself back up right away...way to go!!!
Sounds like you had a very productive!
And I love my chocolate. I have learned to be satisfied with small amounts...must have it, lol!

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Friday, June 03, 2011

Why is there always a "but"? Even in my own mind??? This morning I got on the scale for my weigh in (after re-sparking on Monday) and I lost 1.5 four days! I should be happy with that, and I was, until I thought of how long it is going to take me to get under 200 pds. And why I am I thinking about the 199 goal now, when my mini goal (very mini) was to see below 220? OMG, the numbers are starting to freak me out!!! How did I allow myself to put all this weight on? I can remember when I was at my lowest...I still wasn't happy with my body, but I was a much more confident person! Now I want to avoid everyone because, in my head, i'm thinking that they are all thinking about my fat!
There is always a "but"....

I'm a nice person BUT I'm fat
I lost 1.5 pds BUT, look how far I have to go
That's a cute shirt BUT, it is for a skinny person

I'm sure there are so many other "But's" that we all could keep listing. Why do I do it to myself? Why can't I simply be happy with getting my food back on track and eating healthy? How do I put on my blinders and keep moving forward? There's always the, BUT, it's so far to go!

*sigh* I'm sure I'll get over the "but" hurdle eventually, I just have to keep picking myself up and dusting off my rear.....hopefully along the way I'll notice it getting smaller. LOL

  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

SUZNESS 6/3/2011 10:53AM

    But Angie!.....You are not alone! And....did you gain all that weight overnight? I know I certainly didn't! So why should I expect to lose it all overnight! Try I'm not there yet BUT I've made progress....BUT I'm going in the right direction....But I CAN do this.....etc. It is hard BUT I promise....when I came down to your garage sale I was NOT thinking....Oh MY! Angie has certainly put on weight since school! ;-) I find that we are FAR more self concious about it than other people are focused on it! And I'm right there with you on goals! I want to get below 200 too....but you know what....I have 28 pounds to go and I am only going to get there ONE pound at a time! And EVERY little pound adds up. When you gained weight you probably didn't freak over a ONE pound increase....but they added up! So rejoice over EVERY pound you lose. EVERY step in the right direction and EVERY time someone asks if you lost weight because it means you are making PROGRESS toward a healthier you!

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MDBUTTERFLY 6/3/2011 9:14AM

    Love the "but" hurdle...I do that too!
Maybe turn it around. Like...I have a ways to go BUT Im going to enjoy this journey. Or...This seems overwhelming BUT if I focus on 5 pounds at a time it is very within reach!
Im going to try to turn my buts around ;)

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Day Three...doing well!

Wednesday, June 01, 2011

I re-started my Spark journey on Monday and I am soo Proud of myself! I have yet to start doing regular exercise, because I'm focusing on my food journal. However, I have been doing yard work and such and using that as my exercise for now. I'm just trying to keep moving. I haven't had a Dt Pepsi in 3 days and I really haven't wanted one. I've been drinking mostly water, but later in the day I switch to brewed decaf tea with spirment leaves. Also, today was the first time that I reached the SP goal of eating 7 fruits and veggies a day! Whoo Hoo!
We will be leaving for a family vacation in a few weeks and I'm really worried that i will lose my momentum. Usually when we are camping we eat TONS of pudgy pies, chili dogs and such. My goal is to make a meal plan for us to follow so that we aren't eating pudgy pies. I'm also hoping to get lots of walking done at the state parks, and bike riding as well.

  Member Comments About This Blog Post:


  congratulations on your getting re-sparked! I am new and I have noticed that getting a grip in the food department is really the most helpful thing for me. Portion control and no mindless snacking or eating tibits between meals. That food has lots of calories!! It's a great place to start because no matter how much you exercise you won't lose weight if you are eating too much. I wish you strength on your vacation coming up. May your resolutions be strong. REWARD every success!!

theperfectwait emoticon

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    Woo hoo!! Go you! You are doing everything right!! I'm so happy for you. Baby steps over time are so much easier to stick with. Anyone can give up everything they love for a few days, maybe even a few weeks, BUT no one I know can live that way forever, and that is what this is. Lifestyle changes. I have no doubt you can stick with it while on vacation especially since what you eat is what you pack and bring. So you make all the decisions when you're food shopping and packing. The kids will be so much better off too!! Keep it up!!

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SUZNESS 6/2/2011 7:14AM

    Great job! I am proud of you! It feels good and the key is to remember not to give up if you do mess up. I struggle with that! Keep up the good work and keep posting and let yourself be held accountable! Have a great day!


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I can do this....

Sunday, May 29, 2011

I have finally decided now is the time to pick myself up from rock bottom. I have gained back all the weight I lost with SP, plus I gained 20 pds more. I feel awful about myself and I don't want to go anywhere because I'm afraid people are looking at me and my fat....especially those who saw me at 155 pds! I look at my picture on my SP page with my SP friend, Rhonda, and I can't believe I looked that good and still felt too heavy because I had stomach fat!!!
I want to be a healty, happy person for my kids, my husband, and myself...this is going to be a long, hard road, but I hope I'm finally ready to do this. Tonight I went for a bike ride with my kids and it was a little over 3 miles. I learned 2 things....always wear mosquito spray, and that 2 miles is pretty much my limit; I had to walk 3 times before we got home. But, I'm proud that I did it, I just hope my legs aren't killing me tonight like last week when I rode with the family at Oaubache state park.

  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

WYOKATHERINE 5/30/2011 10:55AM

    Angie I'm so proud of you!!!! I'm going to try and join you. Starting today (though I probably won't be good since it's a holiday) I'm going to log my food.

You CAN do this!!!!

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SUZNESS 5/29/2011 9:54PM

    Whoo Hoo! At let you got out and got moving! Recognizing your limits is really important...but so is stretching, if you think 2 miles is your limit for now, that is fine....but 2 miles doesn't feel like it is doing it, make it 2.5 one time! You will buld up eventually! I am so with you on hating what I look like and feeling like people are looking at my belly fat. So.....I dare you.....I dare you to lose just 10 pounds by the end of summer....Let's go for Labor Day weekend! Every little bit helps! I have 90 pounds to lose so I am going to aim for 20 in that timeframe!

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BARBTWIG 5/29/2011 9:53PM

    Good for you Angie!! Like you said, small steps is sometimes the only way we can go about this lifelong commitment. I've had set backs also, the main thing is that we get past them. Best wishes to you and much success! WE can do this!! Keep in touch. Barb

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