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A Beautiful Sunday Morning(Continued from previous post)

Sunday, May 04, 2008

So here I am, waiting for my laundry to finish drying, listening to the birds singing outside my window. *smiles* The soft whirring of my fan sounds in the background as I contemplate what has occurred since the end of the previous post.

On April 14, about 10:00 am, I get this call from my apt. manager asking me if I have a white Toyota Camry with a club on the steering wheel. I said yes and she said someone tried to break into it. She gave the police my number, Officer Jones called me and told me the story and said that if I could not come home so they could sign it over to me, they would have to tow it! It was friggin 4 feet out of the parking stall!

Anyway...apparently this brilliant guy decided to try and drive it with the club like device I had attached, the car stalled, maintenance noticed and knowing it was not his car, came up to the guy who is in my car and asks him if he was going to take off the club...

Now get this: The dude said he thought when he turned the car on, the club would disengage!

Maintenance told him that before they could push the car back into the parking space, they would have to call Metro...he got all nervous and eventually up and left....quickly.

Metro came, they caught another guy whom they think had nothing to do with the physical attempt on the car, but was prolly in cahoots with the guy in my car.

Now, I was tied to my desk as my boss is out of town...but when they said they were going to tow it...I made sure that I got there in five minutes. I filled out what seems like reams of paper work, checked the car out and aside from damaging the alarm, he screwed up my steering wheel by trying to drive the car with the club on it. *Shakes head at the sheer stupidity*

The maintenance guys got a good look at the dude and were able to give descriptions. They were so cool....They helped me start the car and pull it back into the stall. I need to make them some goodies as a thank you!

So, last week I received a subpoena to go to court as a witness against one of the men who tried to steal my car. When I called the night before, to make sure the case was on the docket, of course it was not. So I have to wait for information and possibly another subpoena. Which is to say, I will not have any satisfaction regarding this ordeal, any more than I had the last time my car was actually stolen. It is quite frustrating.

As of now, I will be spending Christmas in Hawaii! One of my dearest, bestest friends is stationed there and he is flying me out for the holiday. *GRINS* I have not been there since my 21st birthday. *GULP* wow...28 years ago! Holy mackerel! I am so excited! Ohhhhhhh...I will HAVE to have a new swimsuit...

I have started an aqua aerobics class twice a week and I absolutely love it. However...*POUTS* They over chlorinate their pool and I believe I am extremely allergic to the chlorine. I am going to try benedryl after my sessions. This HAS to work out...this class is the best thing I could have found and I look forward to it so much.

I had a moment of insanity last Wednesday and cut all my hair off and lightened it. I am finally get ting used to it and the general consensus amongst all my friends and loved ones is it is the best thing I have done in a very long time! When I told Bryan, my friend in Hawaii, the first thing out of his mouth was, "Define ALL!" I had to laugh...he loved my hair long.

Okay, laundry is done and now it is time for a shower, followed by a short visit to the Library and then I am off to see Iron Man! I am really looking forward to the movie!

And that pretty much catches us up on my little life! *giggles*

Here is to a fabulous day. Be sure to do at least one nice thing for yourself today. Relax...have fun....do something that makes you happy!

Brightest Blessings,
Amethyst

  
  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

PAINTANDSOUL 5/4/2008 10:30PM

    Ooooh!! I loved Iron Man!! And I am so happy for you that you have friends in lovely places to go visit!! :D So now you can go and work for wearing a swimsuit and having a fantastic lovely wet warm Christmas. :)

I am so so very glad to have you back and healthy and happy my love.

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YE GODS! Time flies....

Sunday, May 04, 2008

Wow! It has been ages since I have posted here. So much has happened. Most of it I talk about in my group, but here is a not so brief synopsis...now where to begin:

Well, the beginning I suppose. Last year was a rough year emotionally for me. Early in the year I began to withdraw. It got worse and worse to a point where I didn't care about anything....at all. I had moments of okay....good things did happen to me last year for which I am eternally grateful. I also learned I'm a better actress than I thought. *sighs*...but I felt as if I was drowning. From spending 5 hours a night on the computer, I went to just checking email...I stopped chatting at work *GASP* and became very antisocial. I never left the apartment except to go to work. I was sad and hated myself...for absoultely no reason that I could fathom. I finally went to the doctor in December at the urging of my boss,who thought I was perimenopausal. After running all sorts of tests, I was diagnosed with depression of all things.(Apparently my brain is not making enough seratonin anymore hence my year long funk). He put me on lexapro.I didn't realize how bad it was until I started to feel better and people were to welcoming me back, hugging me and just had looks of utter relief.(I love my friends). *LOL* People knew something was wrong a lot sooner then I did. So that explains my extremely anti-social behavior of the last several months. Now at long last I am back to my relatively normal, cheerful, sassy, occasionally naughty, rambling self.

I had a wonderful Christmas with my sister and her family. They took me for my first visit to the Hotel Del Coronado and it was just beautiful. I can see why my sister and my niece are so enchanted by it. I spent Christmas eve some of my spanking family. I had a blast! Kathy spent the entire day trying to get me in trouble with Floyd. Oh my goodness, it felt so good to laugh so hysterically. I finally did get in trouble though...for NOT getting in trouble. *ROFL* I did redeem myself however, as I stuck my tongue out at Kathy as we passed by...of course she promptly tattled on me! It was a wonderful vacation and the best Christmas I have had in over 8 years.

January 17, I slipped and fell on a patch of black ice and messed up my leg very badly.(Yes we do get ice on odd occasions in Vegas). One day the nurses and my Chief Nuc Med tech were looking at my leg, and Jimmy( The nuc med tech) suddenly went all Toppie on me. *giggles* He lectured me about not going to the doctor sooner and made me promise I would go to the doctor that day. He even had me "Yes sirring" him. I suppose one could say I am just a wee bit stubborn(But you didn't hear it from me!) I know I will hear about this from my REAL Toppie friends when next I see them . I ended up at the doctor's and found out I had cellulitis which is just nasty. I was put on antibiotics and have only one sore that is refusing to heal, but that should resolve itself soon. I declared that this is as bad as this year is going to be and it can only get better from here. So there!

As a result of my enforced down time due to my leg, and my feeling ever so much better with the medication, I have spent a large amount of time lately in deep contemplation and doing a lot of soul searching. So much good has come of it. I am feeling very centered, very grounded and very happy.

Let's see what else...Oh! My dark Celt is back in my life. I had been afraid I would never see him again, so imagine my surprise when he contacted me on December 18th! I was so relieved to hear his voice on my voice mail, I absolutely lost it. Cried for about a half hour in sheer relief and joy. I was so afraid he was going to harm himself after he disappeared. In any event, I had a date with one of my favorite people in the whole entire world. He is the one Bad Boy in my life and I absolutely adore him(even knowing I couldn't possibly live with him, cause I would eventually want to do him harm! *LOL*)

I had not seen him in a year and a half. I was all sorts of twitterpated. I did all the typical girl things to get ready! *LOL* Hair, nails...even my toes!It wouldn't have mattered though, if I had done none of those things. We had the most wonderful time. He took me out to dinner and to see Cirque de Soliel's Love. The absolute best part of our date though, was all the talking we did. I understand him so much better now and love him even more dearly. I felt so much closer to him and am so grateful he trusted me enough to open up to me. He is doing so very much better now. He is so happy in his new home. I can't wait to visit him. I have never been to New Orleans. He lives right in the middle of the French Quarter. Actually, he is one of the items I have been pondering and working on... lo these many weeks. It a very long story, but suffice it to say I was in love with him at one time...I will always love him, but he will only ever be a dear friend.

I have also been contemplating a new real relationship, we'll see. He started out as a good friend I have known for two years, but over the last year we have become closer. I'm just enjoying the journey!

I had gained 14 pounds during the winter. We started "Biggest Loser" competition at work on March 3rd. I have lost 12 pounds in since then and am almost back down to where I was before I got sick and then fell. Yea me! 8 more pounds and I will be 299...for the first time in I can't even tell you how long! This tells you how far I have come...there was a time when NO ONE knew how much I weighed. My mama died never knowing my weight. But I have discovered that it is just a number. I love who I am, right now. The important thing is to continue to get healthier. The weight loss is just gravy.(Although I admit....I am jazzed about my goal)

Which pretty much brings us to today. Which is pretty cool. Life is good...I am good....and there is a lot of promise in the future.

Part two to follow....*LOL*

  
  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

PAINTANDSOUL 5/4/2008 10:25PM

    :D I loved reading this, thank you so much for sharing dearling. Seriously. And thank you soo soo very much for the comments on my blog too. I really do appreciate hearing that!!

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Doubts and fears

Thursday, December 06, 2007

Not sure where to start. I am not right. For several months now, people have been asking me what is wrong,saying I am not myself. They are correct, I have not been myself for some time. I get angry over the stupidest little things, I am unhappy, un-motivated and a hermit. I don't like being around some people I used to love to death. My work roommate is driving me insane. There are times I hate everyone and everything. I don't like myself.

I am not online as much as I used to be....I used to spend hours on line chatting with my friends, posting here at SP. Now I don't feel as if I belong. It is nothing that anyone has done or said. *Sighs* It's just...me.

My vertigo has come back with a vengeance and my heart palpitations have gotten worse. My boss believes that my hormones are way out of whack and it is peri-menopause. I am the right age for it. I have never been prone to depression. But that is almost what it feels like. I have an appointment with my doctor on the 13th. Hopefully he will check my hormones, including my thyroid and advise me what I can do to over come this distasteful state of being. I try to be myself as I used to be, cheerful and optimistic and full of life ..but I feel as if there is this....darkness....engulfing me and snuffing out all signs of who I used to be. It is such an alien feeling. I hate it!

  
  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

H2O4LIFE 12/6/2007 2:10PM

    Darn it Ame, I'm sorry about all this. Hopefully the Dr can give you some insight on why you're feeling this way...sending you warm, bright light and cool nights..~hugs form the Dark

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PAINTANDSOUL 12/6/2007 1:49PM

    My poor lovely Ame!!! I'm sorry to hear this hunny. It happens to me on occasion but it's always stress and sleep linked and therefore while not easy to solve, at least has a pinpointed reason. Not knowing why it's this way has to be the worst. I really hope the doctor has something helpful to say, keep us posted. Oh and guess what, I love you whether you're happy or not. You don't have to be our ray of sunshine all the time, we can be yours when you need it. Love - Brandy

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CORRIN32 12/6/2007 1:22PM

    I know what you are describing all too well. I think I spent close to my entire life feeling the way you are describing at least once a week if not for entire years. It is a hard place to be and that makes it even harder to get out of. I'm glad you decided to go see a doctor! You are a ray of sunshine and I'm willing to help you shine any day sweetie!

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BABEL. 12/6/2007 11:30AM

    A little hermit just wading through the sand and going into a nice little dark cave all alone with no one to bug. I know that feeling. I'm sorry I got no advice but just that you're not alone and you bring so much positivity to the Dark Side that I hope you start to feel like yourself again. Until then, I'll send you some happy joy wishes.

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Back on track!

Sunday, November 11, 2007

3.5 pounds down this week! Yea Me! Despite the stress and self doubt I have been experiencing over the past few weeks, I managed to get focused again. New mini-baby goal...hit 299 by my Christmas party on December 15th.

Actually, that was my first main goal in the first place , to finally break free of 300. I have danced around it for months...sneaking up with in 2 pounds of it, then with a teasing laugh, backing away by just a few pounds. I'm tired of this particular dance.....time for a new Dance, with new Steps...

It is a beautiful day here in Sin City. We are finally below 85 degrees. May I just say that there is something inherently wrong with 85 degree weather in November? Oh wait...did I already vent about this? *LOL* Prolly so! In any event,it is only supposed to be about 73 degrees today with chance of showers this afternoon. Cool beans! *does happy dance*

I have been working on my vision board this week. I still feel as if I need to add a couple of things to it, but it is going to be a marvelous map for what I want, deserve, and WILL have in my life very soon!

I have also started baby stepping with meditation. It has always been so difficult for me, but with the stress of the last few weeks, I need something I can do to ground and center myself. I found a meditation on meeting Brigit at her Forge on Beliefnet.com. I like it, and it is a good place for me to begin.

Well I need to go put my laundry away. I do love the smell and feel of warm,freshly washed/dried clothes and towels. *sighs happily. It is the little things, yanno?

Brightest Blessings,
Amethyst

  
  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

NINIVA 11/11/2007 3:34PM

    *smile*

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WILDONE3 11/11/2007 3:13PM

    You go girl!!! I know you can do this...you keep focusing on what motivates you.

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PAINTANDSOUL 11/11/2007 12:54PM

    You can do it Ame!!! I'm proud of you, despite life being mean to you you're being more than just nice to yourself but moving forward. You can do it!!! I remember the day my best friend broke through, we did a giddy little girl dance together. :D And neither of us is prone to that sort of thing, lol.

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Okay...enough messing around!

Sunday, November 04, 2007

These past couple of weeks have been really rough and I found myself (Not to ANYONE's surprise, least of all me!) stress eating. I have gained 6 pounds. That ...as they say...is QUITE enough!

Since my darling Dark team has new challenges beginning tomorrow, I went in and re-figured my stats...new baby goal of 21 pounds by my birthday which will make 45 pounds gone in just over a year. Not shabby at all.

I have GOT to find that excitement and motivation I had when I first started out. Not sure how...but I shall find it. Part of my wanting to pick up again came from a totally surprising source. I LOVE to watch watch Ballroom Dancing. I have been captivated by "Dancing with the Stars."

Last night I watched the Ballroom Smooth dance Championship competition on PBS and I had this feeling in the pit of my tummy....butterflies and excitement. I can SO see myself in a beautiful, diaphanous , flowing gown, dancing in the arms of a strong , handsome man, looking as if we were dancing on air. (Have I ever mentioned that I am SUCH a GIRL???*LOL*)

I think, once I lose enough weight that I don't feel and LOOK like an elephant on roller skates, I would LOVE to take dance classes. I may bevery much a girly girl...I am a not so graceful one at that. I think I would also love to take some ballet classes to at least try and become a wee bit more graceful. One of my very favorite actresses, Jane Seymore is on this season of Dancing with the stars...when I grow up I want to look like her and be as graceful as she is when she dances.

So, the bottom line is....Back in the saddle....Onward and downwards (as in weight)...I CAN SO do this.

  
  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

LIMELITESHINES 11/6/2007 8:03PM

    HECKYEAH you can do this! *grin* You'd look AMAZING in one of those gowns . . and I'd totally be there right behind you . . I LOOVE ballroom dancing. (just finding a partner that matches with me even when I'm in heels? thats light on his feet? hahahahaha *cough* yeah . . might be rough) *grin* (((HUGS))) I adore you babes!

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PAINTANDSOUL 11/6/2007 1:38PM

    You can do this!! And you want to know what? DWTS has a workout video, in fact, any of the learn to dance videos would be a good workout. You could always try something like that to get yourself into it too, then when you take a class you'll be a 'leg' up, lol. Keep baby stepping lovey.

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H2O4LIFE 11/4/2007 6:11PM

    Good job getting back in the saddle. You can do this. I can soo see you on a dance floor at a grand ball. ~Hugs from the Dark~

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