Sunday, March 31, 2013
I almost hate to say anything, but I think my desire and motivation are making themselves felt again. I'm so tired of feeling hopeless...It is so not like me. I think this may be a result of my thyroid leveling out...or the whole new beginning of Spring...or...... What ever the reason ( I am so not going to try and figure out the whys and wherefores, I'm just going to DO IT!) I'm rethinking goals and making them a little more realistic and breaking them down into steps. Again, not over think and plan...I can spend hours planning and not doing. (Big problem for me!)
I joined the Bibblemun Track Virtual Trek found in Team Indy Girl. This should be a good start. Joined team 2, 800 steps and 10 minutes of exercise. I can do this. I'll post my progress...
Sunday, March 24, 2013
I had a fabulous St. Patrick's day! I went with a friend to Fremont street and saw one of my favorite Celtic bands, and discovered a new favorite band as well! (I even bought a green and white boa to wear! *shakes head* I have no idea what possessed me, it was whim!) I be-bopped to and sang along with all my favorite songs, and bought a CD from my new favorite band. The two best things about being on Fremont Street for St Paddy's day besides the music? Well, first are all bonny lads in (proper) kilts! *sighs happily* The second thing is the people watching! Oh my goodness, they do come out of the woodwork for this holiday!
I am doing a bit better, after gaining a couple more pounds, I am now down. Granted, I'm probably not doing it the best way I can, but I am losing. So my thyroid has finally stabilized. I'm still having odd dreams, but they are not quite as disturbing as recent ones. (I dreamed of my mama last night and woke up happy and sad at the same time.) I'm still going through some bothersome, fluctuating mood swings, so I'm pretty certain I need to see my doctor and check to see if we need to up my medication. (I don't mean to sound like I'm manic depressive! I'm just not my normal obnoxiously cheerful self yet and I miss me!)
All in all I am doing better...I even woke up with a song in my head today, which is always a good sign. I'm going to putter a bit, do a couple of chores and groom my cat.
It's a beautiful morning, and it's going to be a beautiful day. I will make it so! *LOL*
Saturday, March 16, 2013
Making progress toward what is normal for me, but oh, I wish it would hurry up~ I am sleeping a bit better, but still having REALLY weird and often disturbing dreams. I am getting very tired at work ( I sit all day at a computer), and am still lacking in motivation.
On the upside, my weight seems to have stabilized. I have not gained in the last week and half. Now I just need to get it heading in the other direction. The co-workers I am closest to told me I am laughing and smiling more easily and often now, which is good. Another couple of weeks and I will be good. In the meantime, I do what I can, relax when I have to, and take one day at a time.
Now we have gone from winter to almost summer in a matter of a couple of days. I love winter, but even I am looking forward to Spring. Of course, I would be happier if we actually had Spring...it was close to 87 yesterday! *LOL* Awww...Come on...what happened to a few weeks at 70-75 degrees? Which to me is PERFECT weather. *LOL*
Oh well, it is beautiful day and I am just chillin'...with a very demanding cat!
Saturday, March 02, 2013
Well, another week down and what a week it was! Let me back up a bit...Had a fabulous vacation. Seeing my old friend was the best birthday present I have had in forever! I rented a car for four days and ran around like a crazy woman, enjoying the freedom a well running car affords me. Once I returned the car, I stayed home and relaxed and spoiled myself.
On my first day off, I called my (EX) endocrinologist to see why she has not approved my refills for my thyroid medication. I got the voice mail...again... and left my name and number and a "I'm off for the next week, I'll come in and see you, just please ok a refill until then and call me back for an appointment," message. Yeeah, no phone call. left another message and nothing. By this time I am feeling the result of no thyroid and each day is getting a little worse,til by the time I am back to work, I feel like I am am coming out of my skin, I can't focus, I am not sleeping, having night mares when I do sleep, and have a VERY short temper.(Oh! not to mention that no matter how little I eat, I am gaining weight at an alarming rate....another lovely side effect of no thyroid.) I called my primary care doc (which, had I been thinking straight, I should have done a lot sooner) and left a message for her explaining what was going on and guess what, she sent in a script that evening. Wow!
So now it is a waiting game as I am basically starting all over. It takes 2-4 weeks for the meds to come to full power. In the mean time, I have been told by those nearest and dearest to me to be gentle with myself and relax. Hence the lazy weekend and possibility of a nap or two. I have so much to do and I procrastinate enough as it is. But when I want to do stuff and just can't manage, I hate it...
Okay, enough venting...okay whining! *LOL* I'm gonna be fine, I'm just frustrated after feeling so good for as long as I have now. I will be as patient as I can and do what is best for me now, so I can be the best me later.
Have a wonderful weekend and know that you are loved!
Saturday, February 16, 2013
First day of vacation and I was up at my regular time (4:30)! Eh, no problem...mayhaps the days will be longer and slow down enough if I get up on time. Maybe the week will pass more slowly! *LOL*
I had a dream last night that included 3 pure white horses. The first one ran past me and it looked as if it had once had a rider. It was all saddled up. It came running back to me and behind her (or him)were two more. I felt very strongly they were there on purpose and I awoke with the same feeling.
Then, when I checked in on my facebook page shortly thereafter, one of my groups posted a beautiful picture of 6 wild white horses on a beach. I get the feeling I'm being told something, but I have absolutely idea what! I looked up white horses in on online dream dictionary, but of course it was very general. I'm feeling very dense! *LOL*
I have been busy working lots of overtime and fighting the creeping crud that refuses to leave my department. I'm also trying to find out why my endocrinologist has not approved my thyroid medication. I'm a bit off kilter as I haven't had my meds in almost a month and I am gaining weight with no thyroid. I have cut my calories a bit. I called the office yesterday and left a message, but didn't hear anything back! Aarrrrrghhhhh. Speed bumps aside, life is good.
I look forward to these next 10 days. I'm going to have a wonderful "staycation"which I always take the week of my birthday. The highlight of my week will be my yearly visit to the Goddess Temple in Indian Springs on my birthday morning. I am usually the only one there and I spend as much time as I am led by spirit to spend. I leave an offering of thanks and walk the labyrinth. I spend time thinking about the up coming year and what I want to focus on as far as growth and self improvement. I wander and explore the grounds. The temple is dedicated to Sekhmet, however there are representations of many Goddesses there. I Love my time there and had I decent car I would go out more often. (I rent a car for my birthday) I have been out for a few rituals and love it! It's about 45 minutes from home.
Now it is time to face my day. Today is a day to do a few chores to get them out of the way and pick up the rental. Anyone who has never been car-less or has had a car they only trust to go work and the store, will probably never know just how excited I am! YAY!
Sunday I am seeing my best friend from High School that I haven't seen in not quite 20 years, haven't spoken with in more than 11 years. Late last year we found each other on Facebook. Wednesday I received a message from her that she is going to be visiting Vegas this weekend and wants to see me. I am so excited!
Okay, enough rambling...I could go and on today with this wonderful feeling of so much free time.
Have a Fantabulous day!
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