Saturday, November 03, 2012
WARNING: This is a long one! *Smiles*
Yesterday I showed an old work friend a picture I took of her and her department back in 2000. This lead to a rather introspective discussion as she asked me if I would change anything in my life, knowing what I know now. My answer to her leads me to the first thing on my gratitude list.
I thought for just a moment and then shook my head. I would not change a thing. I know that my marriage to Michael and my divorce from him as well, were gifts. As was my cancer and everything that has happened to me in the past 17 years, even my struggle to lose weight. I am today the result of all I have been through. I am where I am today for the same reason.
1995 is the year it all began for me. I was a quiet, intensely shy, mousy, stay at home dreamer. I can pinpoint the exact moment my metamorphosis began. From that moment on, the journey to who I am becoming was set in motion. I love who I am today and who I am becoming. I am still on that journey and I would not change anything that has happened.
2. I am grateful for the lessons as I learn to meditate. It is an ongoing struggle for me to quiet my ever racing mind, and there are times I despair of ever gaining the inner peace I know is there. That being said, I have found that there are lessons to be learned from my racing thoughts. I look forward to the sudden bursts of insights as my mind runs thoughts over and over and I gently(and not so gently) try to guide them to a box to rest, as I continue to focus on my breath or a word. I'm good with this! *LOL*
3. I am thankful that after much ruminating and softly stressing, I have been made aware that (for now anyway) I am to stay in Las Vegas. For years I have grown tired of the high desert; I am a born water baby!(I am a double water sign!) How I have lasted 25 years in the high desert is beyond my ken) I have yearned to live somewhere that has four seasons, is GREEN, and gets rain! I have always thought I would move to the Seattle area. I have friends in Oregon and Washington so I was very comfortable with the idea of starting over.
However, I never had that epiphany of "Move here, move here!" like I did when I came to Vegas. I KNEW I was supposed to be here and I believed that my marriage and divorce were what I had to experience. However, no matter how dissatisfied I grew here, things never fell into place for me to jump into a major move.
During my recovery, I was transferred to the admin building of my company. Normally I embrace change...I am (or was) a born adventurer. As a result of my cancer and recovery, my tolerance for change was nil. I did NOT want to work at this office with my new boss, I did NOT want to move to this side of town! However, being who I am, I did as I was told and here I am.
While I was not thrilled with my new boss and position, I found that I fell in love with this side of town. The longer I am here the more I love it and once I was transferred this past August to my new department I am finding I am happy! I have fallen in love with Vegas. I am much more aware of it's beauty now and find peace here. As I have pondered a move to Washington since my move here, I have been gently made aware that I need to stay here for now. I am at peace with that. Now I can free myself up to experience the next leg of my journey without the stress! I look forward to it with all my heart.
So, onward and upward! Now that I have rambled on, it is time for me to get off my tush and get to some Fall cleaning!
Life is good!
Friday, November 02, 2012
I LOVE this time of year! Here in Vegas we are finally cooling off for which I am so very thankful! I want to wear my autumn clothing, darn it! In any case, I had a wonderful day yesterday!
I am thankful work went so well yesterday and that I accomplished so much. I lovedending the work day with such a sense of contentment and accomplishment.
Speaking of work, I am so grateful that the Universe conspired to get me into my present position. Before this, I was under so much stress, more than I even realized. For the first time in such a long time (we're talking years here!), I look forward to going to work. I enjoy what I do and I'm good at it. Okay, yes, having a giant window that faces the mountains REALLY helps! *grins* It is a soothing balm to look out and see the wind rustling through the trees,see the clouds shadow the mountain, watch the rain fall...it does a psyche good!
I'm so thankful for my fur baby Shade and the joy she brings me each and every day. The unconditional love she shares with me. The playfulness, the attitude, the cuddles and purrs mean the world to me.
Have a most awesome day!
Thursday, November 01, 2012
November is one of my favorite months and Thanksgiving holds so many wonderful memories. I hate how Thanksgiving gets lost in the shuffle between Halloween and Christmas.
One of my favorite things to do is keep a gratitude journal. Over the last couple of years I have become very lax in keeping it, although I have so many things to grateful for and try to always say thank you for my blessings everyday. However, there is power in writing things down.
My goal this month is to use my blog as a gratitude journal. I commit to writing at least 3 things I am grateful for everyday. There is a very strong feeling in myself today that I need to do this, the Universe is gently insistent this morning. It's time to make gratitude a daily blessing again!
1. The beautiful sunrise that is gracing my view with pinks, gold, and wisps of white clouds.
2. My health! Everyday I get stronger and healthier and I am so thankful for my life!
3. For Spark People and all the difference it has made in my life. It has been a slow journey, filled with ups and downs. However, I keep moving forward a little every day and that is because I have this wonderful site with supportive friends who travel the journey with me!
Bright blessings on this beautiful morning, have a splendiferous day!
Sunday, September 16, 2012
Well, yeah....It's been an interesting few weeks. I vacillate between going great guns and doing pretty much everything right, then it trickles away to practically nothing. I ate poorly yesterday and I have to admit it was by choice. I'd been fighting a certain craving for days and finally decided to follow through, rather than let it build and become an obsession. So I followed the 1 step back and 2 steps forward idea. I decided not to feel guilty over my decision. I enjoyed it, it tasted good and I felt content.
Today I ate on the lower side of my calorie range, had 6 servings of veggies, drank all my water and exercised for 30 minutes. I made the commitment to keep moving forward. I am so determined to see more results. My clothes are getting a wee bit looser. I know I'm doing something right more times than not and that is enough to keep me going.
I have my new wardrobe planned and I m looking forward especially to getting my arms toned up. Yes I know, kinda odd...but I wanna go sleeveless! *LOL* In any event, I'm really and truly okay and it feels really good to say it and mean it. There was a time, not too horribly long ago, if I had a day like yesterday, i would have thrown in the towel and given up. So, yeah...I'm feeling pretty good.
Here is to a Sparking good week!
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