Thursday, June 04, 2009
So, I've been having this weird phenomenon where I am definitely shrinking, but the scale hasn't moved at all. I have less weight around my face and arms; I can fit into pants that I once couldn't; and I've lost an inch from the widest part of my waist.
But then I stepped onto the scale for the first time in ages and found I'd only dropped one pound? I haven't been doing a lot of weight lifting, so it doesn't seem likely the muscle gain would be offsetting the loss of fat. I don't care, cause as long as I look smaller, I could care less how heavy I am, I'm just starting to wonder if I'm going to always have to be classified as "overweight" according to my BMI. That seems so ridiculous.
Does anyone else's body act like this? Where it just picks a weight and refuses to budge?
Thursday, March 26, 2009
Okay. New Plan.
1. Less ambitious weight loss. All that happens when I go for broke is that I burn out. My current goal is to drop 15 pounds by August first when I go home for my best friend's wedding. It's a loss of just under a pound a week and hits that nifty 10% mark. This puts me at 1440-1760 cals/day, which sounds much more like something I can actually stick to than 1200-1500.
2. More reasonable, but more regular, exercise. I'm fit, I just can't get myself into a rhythm. So rather than the previous goal of two hours four to five times a week (8-10 hours in theory, in practice, never more than six) I go for one hour every day. Yoga, weights, running, bootcamp, it can be anything, but I need to log one hour a day, everyday.
Day one starts tomorrow! Here we go!
Wednesday, February 04, 2009
So, last week was phenomenal, as far as exercise goes, and my eating wasn't too far off from where I wanted it to be. I was happy to finally be getting back into a groove.
And then I got sick. For the second time in two months.
My problem is that when I'm sick, I just don't want to do cardio at all. My throat get swollen and my sinuses make it so hard to breathe. Plus, I really don't want to be coughing all over the exercise machines at the gym and getting everybody else sick. I'm still doing my weights and trying to keep my eating in line, but bleah.
I guess it's kind of good timing though. I just noticed that I was getting shin splints last week and should probably take a break from running for a bit. Two birds with one stone?
Thursday, January 15, 2009
So, the one good thing about my continual mess ups on this site is that I'm actually learning from them, as opposed to all the years beforehand where I was able to stay in my little cave of denial.
I was successful with my diet over the last two weeks and dropped two pounds, which was really exciting. And then my body just snapped and I totally succumbed to my food addiction, to levels that I never had before. I would stuff myself until my stomach hurt and was distended. And then I would keep on going about a half hour later. I had always had the sense that my eating was unhealthy, but it had never been this bad. And I ended up having to admit to myself that this was not normal.
Beyond simple emotional eating, my food consumption is something that is beyond my control and I need to start addressing it as such. The fact that I work in food service, in a place with dozens of different types of baked goods that I'm not supposed to be taking, but really, there's no way for them to know that I took them? Is totally enabling my problem and exacerbating it to new levels.
In short, I'm going to have to start putting myself through rehab. I've considered attending OA meetings, but I'm not fully comfortable with the 12 step program and am not certain that it's right for me. So for now, I'm adapting the principles and trying to make a go as is.
So, in the short term, I'm now going to start carrying gum with me constantly so that I have something to put in my mouth when the compulsion hits. I'm also going to start carrying a pocket notebook with me whenever I'm at work. Before I can eat anything on duty, I have to pull it out, write down the date, time, food, estimated calories and what thought or emotion triggered the craving. Writing it down doesn't mean I can't or won't eat it, but at least I'll start thinking about it and will maybe know why I'm doing this.
In the longer run, I think I need to find some sort of spiritual path for myself. Though I am an atheist, I do acknowledge that humans have a spiritual element. I think is probably grounded in neurological mechanisms that we haven't fully explained, but I think it's there and that most people need it to be satisfied, just as much as we need social contact and emotional support. So on Friday night, I'll be attending my first Buddhist meditation. Hopefully, I'll find some connection with the teachings, as every other Buddhist group seems to hold their meetings on Sunday mornings, when I have to work.
Anyways, here's hoping it works. And if I can't pull it together on my own, it's off to the OA meetings I go.
Tuesday, January 13, 2009
Since the last time I wrote, I lost two pounds. Then, I had a fairly awful week (food-wise) and we're still waiting to learn what the damage is tomorrow. I fell off the wagon pretty completely last week and I'm trying to find ways to get myself excited and active about losing weight again. It's just way too easy to sit back and think, "Well, I'll still have time to lose before swimsuit season."
Every week, I've been experimenting with cooking two new meals/items, so that I don't get bored with my food. I've mostly been using stuff from "The Food You Crave" by Ellie Krieger, which I highly recommend. The recipes are always good, but I've yet to stumble across ones that I'd consider "keepers," the ones that I actually feel compelled to eat again. I always try to have at least one include meat, otherwise I always struggle to hit my minimum protein. I also look for stuff with between 200-400 calories/serving and eat 5-6 times a day. This is made exponentially easier by the fact that TFYC has nutritional info printed with the recipes. Whenever I put them into SP, it always calculates slightly higher calorie counts though. I don't know what's up with that.
This week, I'm being more ambitious than usual and am buying ingredients for:
Buffalo Chicken Salad with Blue Cheese Dressing (TFYC)
Turkey Meatballs (TFYC) (The whole recipe includes a from-scratch tomato sauce, but I'm just gonna make the meatballs and buy canned sauce)
Sweet Potato and Red Bean Curry (Vegan Planet)
Sweet and Spicy Grilled Cheese Sandwiches (TFYC)
I also have 90% of the ingredients I need to make her Almond-Chocolate-Cherry Biscotti, which I intended to make last week, but never did. And then I ate the chocolate. So I need to restock that. Realistically, the salad will probably get pushed to next week, but I'm trying to have one salad a day and I'm bored with my usual - spinach, butterleaf lettuce, red & yellow bell peppers, feta and some kind of dressing - so I figure I'll pick the stuff up for this one, just in case.
Alright, part of getting back on this weight loss train is getting to bed early enough that I can wake up tomorrow and workout before work. So, I'm off to bed.
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