Saturday, December 01, 2012
So, I've made it through a great day without going over my nutrition goals. I feel good and I know that if I drink some water and go to sleep, that I'll wake up feeling GREAT tomorrow morning.
I also know that I could realistically spare a few more calories and not be too far off course. I know that the cornerstore has some delicious treats that are begging for my attention. I know that I would have enough self-control and would be able to walk in there and just buy maaaybe a small pack or two of candy ...or perhaps a tiny bag of chips ...possibly some light beer ...maybe some ice cream. No matter what, I know I can control myself ...but why?
Why is it, that even though I've made it through an amazing day and am hours away from a vibrant wake-up, I still feel those same old "fat girl urges" that will ultimately have me racking up about 50 dollars worth of junk, only to inhale it all tonight and wake up puffy-faced tomorrow morning? What is it about this time of night that makes me want to throw caution [and reason] to the wind?
Who knows ...but what I CAN tell you, is that I am incredibly thankful in this moment for Sparkpeople.com and for the ability to vent via blog, as opposed to trying to battle my cravings in the middle of the corner store aisles.
So, now that I am nearing the end of this letter of assurance to myself, I will wrap it neatly with a promise bow ...a promise to NOT undermine my own success. Maybe I will falter in the coming days, weeks or months ...but not today. I am in control of these 24 hours ...and one thing I've learned is: You can do ANYTHING for 24 hours. For these 24 hours, I will be a fitness goddess ...a snob that is too good for late night binges.
Monday, November 26, 2012
Well, I just got back from my very first BodyPump class and let me say, I am a fan! Not only was this my first crack at BodyPump, but it was also the first gym class I had ever taken that wasn't MMA-related.
I didn't know what to anticipate and thought that I would either be looked at funny for raising my hand in response to the dreaded "Who's new to this class?" question, or they would laugh at the fact that I was stacking low weights on my bar ...to my surprise, neither happened!
The instructor was awesome and the group was neither overly friendly or off-putting ...they simply wanted to get in there and "do work" --and THAT, is something that I respect and dig!
I will definitely be incorporating this class into my weekly regimen, but that's not all. I was sparked by the class before us as well as the class after and am definitely looking forward to trying out everything that my gym has to offer. The resources have always been there, I just never thought to try.
I am truly thankful for this day and the new experiences it has brought my way. I feel unbelievably energetic and encouraged right now ...and that is a definite 180, when compared to how I felt earlier today.
I know what makes me feel good and I know how to change a "blue" lull ...I just have to remember that it's up to me to grab the wheel and point myself toward activities like this that will propel me back to optimism and rejuvenation.
This was more of just my ramblings to myself ...I wanted to write something that I could read later. Something that would remind me that the way things are, in this moment, are not the way they'll always be ...and I definitely have the power to choose positive thought over difficult setbacks.
So, Alyssa , if you're reading this ...what gym class are you attending today? More importantly, what are you doing to ensure that this day gets stacked on the "Productive" pile??
Thursday, November 22, 2012
Well, this is that last of this installment. I broke my fast last night with the tray of fresh fruit that I had brought back to my room. No sooner had I finished the last bite, I was out like a light! Boy, I never realized what a toll digestion takes on your body ...but I guess it makes sense, considering that is the number one taxing process your body engages in [even more so than swimming or any other physical activity!].
I can say that today's meal was a bit more on the decadent side, to include some delicious marshmallow and tropical fruit salad. I was prepared for the gluttony, but kept my promise to myself and immediately returned to intermittent fasting upon breaking the water fast. I kept my Thanksgiving indulgence to a reasonable spread and managed to fit the entire meal into an 1,175 calorie package. That sounds like a lot for one meal, and it is, but that is the point of intermittent fasting ...one meal a day, as much as you feel your body needs, then let it process the food and rest/clean/repair for 24 hours. The idea that you need to eat 6 small meals a day, for ME, is a myth and just does not jive with my machine. My body has always ran best on one meal a day and now there are people that are saying that there's some science behind that way of thinking. That's why I say --always, always, ALWAYS listen to your body. YOU know what works best for you. YOU know what foods fuel you and which ones will have you curled up on the couch ready for some good ol' siesta action. What works great for one may not work great for the other. Years of research has brought me to the conclusion that my body works best with one average to large meal in the mid-late afternoon hours.
But, back to the initial topic: Water Fasting! This fast was only 3 days, but I am definitely glad I did it. At no point was it taxing and I wasn't on the verge of a homicidal spree because I accidentally flipped the television to Food Network. It was a clarifying reboot and I am definitely looking forward to my future trists and extended honeymoons with my beloved agua ...but for now, I am back on the food train.
I will say this, before I wrap it up, aside from the mental clarity and physical benefits fasting [intermittent, water and juice] has brought into my life, is has also removed my addiction to food. From the time that I was an obese teen, all the way into my active, physically fit, adult life, food acted as a cancer and crept into every aspect of me. I would literally eat one meal while I was thinking about the next. Food was such an obsession that I was, hands down, one of the most extremely bulimic people, purging up to 3 and 4 times a day ...up until I began fasting. I broke an addiction that controlled and consumed me, and that is one of the most rewarding things in life ...to be able to look yourself in the mirror and know in your heart of hearts that you alone have control over your life, your thoughts, your impulses and, above all else, your actions in response to all of those things.
So, with that being said, I pray that you all enjoy a blessed and Happy Thanksgiving. Remember, once you begin to visualize and believe in your desired end state, providence moves to bring that reality to your feet.
"The earth turns on its orbit for you. The oceans ebb and flow for you. The birds sing for you. The sun rises and it sets for you. The stars come out for you. Every beautiful thing you see, every wondrous thing you experience, is all there, for you. Take a look around. None of it can exist, without you. No matter who you thought you were, now you know the Truth of Who You Really Are. You are the master of the Universe. You are the heir to the kingdom. You are the perfection of Life. And now you know The Secret. May the joy be with you."
Free to fly _..-~*
Wednesday, November 21, 2012
I must say, waking up this morning was both satisfying and defeating. I don't know what I was expecting, but it was just kind of like a "meh" feeling, when I rolled out of bed.
Energy levels are normal, so I'm thankful for that. I'm starting to feel a bit spacey and notice that I'll easily slip into a stare and my mind just wanders ...kinda cool, but new. The disappointment came when I got up and got a side profile in the mirror. I don't know what I expected to see, but I think I was expecting too much. I think I thought I would wake up and suddenly have this fitness model body ...but was greeted by more puffiness than I cared to see. I know that I am making progress and can see it all over my body and in my face, it just wasn't where I imagined it would be.
Immediately, my thoughts shot straight to "Well, at noon I'll be at the 72 hour mark and that's where I wanted to go ...soooo, high five, I'm done." As I sat drinking my a.m. round of agua, I began to crank out my morning e-mail to my mom. When I started typing I was sure I would break my fast at the end of the day, but by the end, I had transitioned to being somewhat fluid about the choice. I didn't want to decide at that moment where the day would take me.
Anyhoot, I set out for my morning appointments, and you guessed it, someone was having a promotion party and what did they have as their choice of cake? Why D.C. Cupcakes, of course! Oh. My. Goodness. If THAT isn't a reason to break any sort of diet or nutrition plan, I don't know WHAT is!
Buuut, reluctantly I politely rejected the offer and continued on with my appointment. I ended up getting swept into a meet and greet with a relatively famous amputee and before I knew it, it was well past my 72 hour mark. After the meet and greet, I got pulled for two more appointments, then was able to escape ...unharmed and impervious to the deliciousness that is, D.C. Cupcakes.
I went and swung by the local mart and scooped up a giant tray full of fresh, diced fruit, along with two bananas ...if I was going to possibly break this fast, I wanted to ensure that I had the right tools handy.
After grabbing the vittles, I came back to my room and immediately threw them in the refrigerator. I then sat down at the computer and logged on, while I started sipping my water. I watched a few Youtube videos on fasting and intermittent fasting, and those kind of jogged the motivation for me ...I was now leaning more toward continuing the fast.
That's when it happened. I got up and to walk to the sink and caught a glimpse of myself in the mirror. This sounds like such a superficial and narcissistic way to find motivation, but I was pleasantly surprised with the brightness of my face and how slender I appeared. Immediately I thought to myself "Keep it going ...jump on Spark and start slappin' that blog together. Stay the course!"
So, here I sit, a few hours past my goal and I am feeling ready, in this moment, to continue. Above all else, I am perfectly happy with where I have gotten, so it won't be a devastating blow if I decide that breaking my fast tonight is the choice for me.
We shall see...
*Again, as previously stated in earlier blogs, this is strictly meant to track my personal journey. I am in no way endorsing dangerous activities and I am not attempting to give medical advice. This is just me ...one random chick against a world bombarded with toxins.
Tuesday, November 20, 2012
The 48 hour mark is behind me and I am rapidly approaching the 52 hour mark ...and yes, I am already breaking it down into 6 hour increments!
I have to admit, today was a bit of a test. I woke up feeling energetic and encouraged by a face that was not puffy and almost immediately after waking, went ahead and drank my cup of coffee. Riding my a.m. high, I decided to go ahead and log on to my online college course and take my next quiz ...10 out of 10! Needless to say, it was a great morning.
Well, about 3 hours into my day, I get a random text out of the blue that completely through me for a loop and immediately fired me up. As I felt the blood boiling, I immediately snapped into the reality that I knew all too well ...that the moment I decide what kind of day this is going to be, that is when my day will take form. I stewed and contemplated just running to the nearest store --"Screw it ...who cares? I can just have soup or juice. I'm stupid for doing this anyway ...I should be enjoying food ...it's almost Thanksgiving for goodness sake!"
...and then I thought of the blog. At first I thought "No one's going to read it anyway ...you can delete it and no one would even know." I have to admit, I posed a pretty convincing argument and had all the reasons I needed to quit.
I can't exactly say why, but I pushed myself through the irritation, and came home to chug some water. I think, more than anything else, I wanted to feel the satisfaction of typing this blog ...and I am really proud of the fact that I have now surpassed all previous fasts. I am encouraged and excited to see how I feel at the 72 hour mark.
All that considered, here's to the next 24! I was told, by one of the most intelligent Muay Thai instructors I've ever trained under, that "you can do anything for 24 hours", so that is where I will set my sights. YES, of course, I have a goal and an ideal length of time that I'd like to successfully fast for ...but, for now, 24 hours is enough to keep me smiling.
Again, this blog is not meant to offer any sort of medical advice, and this blog is not meant to encourage anyone to fast. This is my personal journey through the fasting process and a means to keep myself accountable.
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