Wednesday, January 23, 2013
Feeling pretty good about my workouts lately, I'm feeling stronger, and while I'm struggling with temptations and cravings more these days I'm still losing just more slowly. I'm enjoying how certain clothing is fitting and going out more often. of course there's more to come and I'm excited about that to.
Recently gone a few dates with a nice man who seems to like me a lot, and I had to tell him I couldn't make a commitment. I just don't know what I want out of my life yet and I don't want to feel trapped into something because I might just change my mind in a few months. So maybe dating isn't a great plan right now.
I think I really need to focus on self discovery right now, I never used to understand what people meant when they would say they needed to find themselves, but now I do, that's me right now. And it's lonely that's why i was reaching out in the first place but I think what I need now is friendship as opposed to romance, the problem is I'm a sucker for it.
Some major changes coming at work soon, positives and negatives attached to that. have to wait and see how it plays out and hope for the best (and maybe a raise). But all in all things are ok now just keep a positive attitude and and take care of myself better and those I love, sometimes its nice to pour out my thoughts and feeling where I can see them and take stock of how I am doing, gets confused in my head lol.
I think I'm alright
Sunday, January 06, 2013
and well really the last few days... or maybe since after christmas I don't know. I guess it's my fault I lost my momentum gave into the food and ate horribly for like a week and missed workouts for several days now as a result i feel awful inside and out. I'm back at it now doing better the last couple days so at least I can banish the guilt. I'm so lonely though, and I can't seem to find people that want to be around me, so it gets hard to believe that its not me. Which begs the question is it the way I look or is it just me?
I guess I'll get through this and maybe start feeling better in a day or so if I keep taking care of myself, lose more weight, just stay focused and try not to focus on the negatives. then the positives will maybe become a little more visible. It'll get better...
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