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The person I don't want to be...

Thursday, May 12, 2011

And, it's got nothing to do with weight. I'm slowly getting there. It has to do with being an "angry" person, which really isn't who I am. However, work has been getting to me lately as have some of the people I work with. Today a friend and co-worker gently told me that I seem angrier. It was something I had already realized. It's a place I don't want to go.

We have a new director coming in in August and a lot of decisions are being put on hold. The interim director wasn't selected (and she was interviewed) so that's a bit awkward. The new person isn't a person I voted on (description of socially awkward has been given by more than one person and you can't really be that in this job). Given all that I don't think much will change. However, the interim director I think is having issues and my manager is a little more frustrated than he has been since I started working there almost three years ago. I think in some ways I'm feeding off of his frustrations and I need to figure out not to do that.

My annual trip to IL is delayed this year due to the flooding in the areas along our route. So, one step I'm doing is taking at least one, maybe two days off at Memorial Day. I have the vacation days and it would probably do me good.

I think the exercise I'm doing will help, especially once I establish a good schedule for the days I do whatever I do - classes, strength, DVD, etc.

Some things at work, I'm just letting go. They aren't fun anymore and I'm tired of butting heads with people, so I'm letting it go. There are other areas I can focus on. I can also hope something comes of the job I applied for, but I know that might not be, so I'm planning as if it won't.

And, maybe I'll take up meditation. Who knows, but I do know I won't be an angry person. It happened once before and I left the job. I don't think it's that extreme this time, but I definitely need to develop some type of coping mechanism and let it all just roll off of me.

  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

STRONGERLEANER 5/20/2011 10:37PM

    When things go wrong, especially when it's one thing after another, it's easy to become either frustrated or angry, possibly even both. I think you're on the right track with identifying that it could prove to be harmful to you and that you are looking for ways to use that energy for something positive.

Keep working out. It always helps me. I also find focusing learning something new serves as a great distraction. You can set goals and have a new hobby or skill.

Keep pressing forward! Keep loving yourself!
emoticon emoticon

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KAYOTIC 5/14/2011 12:26PM

    I've been struggling with this lately as well, maybe not becoming angry (well, yes becoming angry, bitter, depressed, moody, B*tchy, etc) because of work. (And to be more precise, my director....) You mentioned meditation, this probably would help take some edge off. I do yoga almost every morning, and that has really lowered my stress level, and given me a way of coping and dealing with it.

And good luck w/ the job you applied for, even if it doesn't happen, at least you can try.

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PEGG123321 5/13/2011 6:48AM

    Ah yes the frustrations that come with work. These things do come and go. I've been at the same company for 18.5 years and I've been where you are & also didn't want to be an "angry person" either. Sometimes you just have to accept that things aren't in your control and when needed POINT the finger at who is responsible if its your work that can't be completed due to decisions that are on hold. Sounds like you've stepped back & are taking a good approach at the situation. Best of Luck...when all else fails close your eyes, count to 10 & go to your happy place. emoticon

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Pondering changes....

Sunday, May 08, 2011

The last couple of weeks have been busy, but I have been getting to the gym and have sampled a variety of classes. Right now, it looks like the ones I'll be sticking with are step and yoga, both of which I'm very much enjoying. My weight loss is still really stalled. I realized that my strength training had pretty much flown out the window, so today, I started that back up. Between SP, some videos and (of all places), I'm trying to come up with a couple of routines to give me some variety. I'm also hoping to incorporate some of the machines at the gym on the days that I'm there.

The two other changes are not related, but could re-charge me as well. One is learning more about vegetarianism to see if it's something I can move toward. I've ordered a book. It might seem goofy, however, protein is something I'm worried about and I also am not overly fond of a number of vegetables. At this point, I don't see me going totally vegetarian (and probably never vegan as I really, really like dairy products and avoid soy products), but I don't eat a lot of meat to begin with and would like to maybe really do several days a week vegetarian. The book I selected got good reviews and lays out the good and the bad in what appears to be a well-rounded approach.

The big change though is job related. I'm not unhappy, however, I would like more of challenge. A job was forwarded to me by a co-worker and my first response was NO, it's in DC (which I've avoided for literally years, though I do like DC). Then I read it. OMG. It's so what I do, with a little added responsibility and some new challenges. It would require I move, but this time the move would not entail a whole new state, etc, just a little closer to where I'd be working. My commute would be a bit longer, but I could use public transportation, which I've done before, which actually gives you a bit to unwind on the way home (I read on the train). So, I got all my stuff updated and today I applied for the job. I'm not sure what will happen, but at least I applied so I won't have to wonder what might have happened if I'd applied.

  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

SUZANNE0606 5/9/2011 1:12AM

    Wow, you DO have a lot going on!!!

I don't eat much meat, either. I get most of my protein from a protein shake every morning, soynut butter at night and egg whites. That seems to help get my protein number up each day.

You're right about the downtime when you are commuting. My husband takes the bus on most days and loves his reading and/or napping time!

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ELISADENK 5/8/2011 10:22PM

    Wow! A lot going on. Wishing you THE BEST!!

You can go easy on the vegetarian issue. Some people have 1 or 2 meat-free dinners a week. That kind of thing.

One Veg told me there is plenty of protein in veggies..... emoticon emoticon

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MISSY0356 5/8/2011 6:40PM

    As for the stall in your weight loss, we have all been there (I'm there again now) it will pass, just keep on tracking your food and getting in your exercise. I too like step and yoga. As for eating less meat, nothing says you have to go completely vegetarian, do whatever feels right to you.
Glad you applied for the job, if you interview and don't feel its right for you, at least you will have explored the option and not be left wondering "what if". Plus it is always good to practice your interviewing skills. I find that most times my gut instinct is right so if you interview you will probably know right away whether or not it is for you. Good luck and I hope it all turns out the way you want it to.

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Trying to jumpstart....

Sunday, April 17, 2011

Or to just get re-started. I've stalled on the weight loss. I play with a couple of pounds, but nothing is really happening. Plus, I get home from work and am just not in the mood to exercise, so I stall on the workout.

After the issue with the back, I decided I needed to something more active. So, I checked out the fitness center right up the street from my apartment. It's literally within walking distance (1.1 miles round trip to be exact, which is a nice bonus for added exercise for the day). It's pricey, which is why I'd held off for this long. It's a smallish club and I really liked it. If I use it 6 times between when I joined (about a week ago) and June, June is free. That is so doable.

I did test drive a yoga class before joining and it's been a good decision. They offer yoga classes at times I can do, as well as other classes. This morning was my second step class. It's been years since I've done step, but I keep up pretty well. I've done two yoga classes and have enjoyed both of them. Tomorrow night I'm going to try a Turbo Kick class and eventually I'll try the spin class (see if does more for me than the spin class I took for awhile several years ago). I figure I'll sample the classes, see what works for me, then build a schedule around that. The yoga class I've tried was on Monday nights as is the Turbo Kick class, but it's later. So, before the Turbo Kick class, I'll get in some strength training on the weight machines and then give the Wednesday yoga class a try. I figure if I like it, I can do a late'ish class one day a week. The Sunday step class is at 8:30 am, but I'm finding it gives me a good start to the day.

And, on the cooking front, I've been experimenting with the baby crockpot and am finding that I really like it. Today, I did chicken breast, cheddar cheese soup and gluten free pasta (using Quinoa and corn flours and it tastes great), plus I did some different substitutions on the Cinnamon muffins I baked and I think they turned out better than they have when I previously baked them (it's one of my favorite recipes).

Sometimes it's two steps back and one step forward, but as long I keep moving, I guess it's all good.

  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

XHASTEDMOMOF2 5/5/2011 10:46PM

    Just checking on how you're doing -- hope you are enjoying your gym!! It sounds like a great place!!! And how's your baby crockpot??

Keep on moving!!!


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SUZANNE0606 4/17/2011 11:47PM

    The fitness center sounds great, especially if you can get a month for free. I love my crockpot. I should use it more! Thanks for the great ideas!

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ELISADENK 4/17/2011 10:57PM

    Maybe going gluten-free will help. emoticon

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KERRYG155 4/17/2011 7:26PM

    It would be nice if losing weight and getting in shape was always stepping forward, but there are definitely times they go back. You've made some great strides forward. I have taken cycling through the years with lots of different instructors and the leader sure does make a difference in the fun and the burn. Hope you find one you like. I also discovered that I did better getting up and working out at 5:30am was actually a great way to start the day! Keep up the good work and you will soon see big changes. emoticon

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Tuesday, March 29, 2011

Recently, I decided I needed to talk to a doctor about a couple of ongoing problems. One is with constant sinus problems - I'm stuffed up a lot and decided that taking decongestants on a routine basis is not what I want to do unless, of course, that's what I need to do. I also wanted to make sure I was managing the bursitis in my hip the way I should as it's been hanging on for a while and makes sleeping a fairly miserable experience at times.

First, I had to find a decent doctor. Which, imho, is a crap shoot no matter how you look at it. Well, I did. I really like this guy. He, of course, asked what the diagnosis on the sinuses was and I said none. True, doctors have generally just thrown allergy medicine at me or told me to take the decongestants, but no real diagnosis. When I mentioned the hip and the pain that I've had at times in my leg, he immediately thought nerves, which I'd never considered. Just didn't occur to me. He ordered a CT scan of my sinuses and x-rays of my lower spine.

Well, I expected nothing to show up. Oops. The sinuses do show allergies, but they are narrow, a somewhat deviated septum, and a couple of other things that coupled with the allergies leaves me stopped up. Flonase should take care of that. Yay.

The big surprise was the back. Umm... the very lower disc is showing signs of disc desiccation. Meaning it's drying out. Yikes! I work out and while I know my diet could be better it's not absolutely horrible. It's only the one disc and when I asked what I need to do, it's core strength, which fortunately I've been focusing on more lately.

The other surprise was the tech/Dr reading the x-rays noticed what could be gallstones on the x-rays as well. I looked up what goes with that. I have no pain, thank goodness, but some of the other stomach upset stuff is there. Now I know. I found a site that listed a diet and trigger foods for gallstone/gallbladder problems. Oh dear. Pretty much most of my diet. Well, I'd already started considering some of it as it gets worse with too much bread, pasta, etc, so I was already thinking wheat/gluten products. I'm not sure I want to eliminate everything in my diet, but I am going to spend some time trying to do one off eliminations and seeing how that goes. If anyone has any sites or other information for a diet related to this, please let me know. I looked at SP teams and they seem rather inactive and not diet focused. Which doesn't really mean anything, but I know I need to figure how how I'm going to go forward diet wise because I'm fairly sure that's what's going to make a difference.


DVD Review: The Pursuit of Happy Hips (All Downhill)

Saturday, March 19, 2011

This is my third yoga DVD from Eionn Finn, who is one of my favorite yoga instructors. This DVD contains 4 workouts ranging from 43 minutes to 79 minutes and varying in levels of intensity. This review is for All Downhill, which incorporates some sun salutations in addition to standing poses (side bend, triangle), balance poses (standing pigeon) and floor poses. This DVD does focus on opening the hips, which is what I need at times. The other two DVDs I have (Power Yoga for Happiness I and II) are power yoga and more of a workout. This routine is more relaxed which is what I sometimes need. There are some advanced poses, but there is someone to show the modifications, which I do a lot.

I have bursitis in one hip that is flaring. I wanted to do a longer routine, but this one was a good one to ease back into working out. Itís a calm workout thatís a good way to start or end a day. This routine wonít burn a ton of calories, but itís not always about burning the calories, especially if youíre doing yoga.

  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

XHASTEDMOMOF2 3/24/2011 10:03PM

    I just love reading your take on your yoga workouts!!! Thanks for doing this!! And now i have another DVD to put on my wish list!!


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KAYOTIC 3/20/2011 12:59PM

    I love yoga DVD's thanks for the review! I'm not familiar with this instructor, will definitely look into this DVD.

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