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Having a tough day

Friday, January 14, 2011

Well wednesday i was having a hard day because of the weather (i have fibromyalgia) it is usually under control most days but storms really do a number on me... I did a zumba class tuesday and worked hard (which was good... wednesday was a wash.. thursday i went to a stretch and tone class and basically was toold i was fat by the instructor .. this woman doesnt know me from a hole in the wal nor does she know i was an instructor at one point in my life and never ever was this heavy.. nor does she know i couldnt walk 2 and 1/2 years ago.. and have put on weight because of it... but still made sure she ppoked at me thru the whole class.. she was lucky i didt get up smack her with a mat and leave.
So made it thru the class.. vowing only to go back if I am not feeling well (one of those slow boring classes) but i exercised and did well for a fat person :P

last night i was starting to doubt myself.. i have had such modivation to lose this weight.. such drive... and i still do just feeling down I guess.. the scale hasnt really moved down at all... and i dont want to do any measuring til monday.. but i dont think that has changed much either.. and now i work all weekend and going to zumba before work tomorrow...I am making the effort.. when will i see the rewards.. i track my food.. i excerise.. feeling a little defeated and monday will be the start of the 3rd week...
i guess she got under my skin and stepping on the scale and not seeing it move welljust adds to it..
keep trudging along i guess..

  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

DEBBIEDAY 1/14/2011 6:52PM

    emoticonIn my opinion that instructor had no business leading a class and making such comments!!!

The best revenge is to simply ignore her and (maybe) go back in her class as you lose weight and flaunt your stuff!! LOL...

You ARE doing it! It takes time and does get frustrating when the scales doesn't show all our hard work but you are there, in the gym exercising while most people are still sitting on the sofa watching the tube 'wishing' they could get in shape!

Give yourself a hug and a huge pat on the back for doing what needs to be done to reach your goals...


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ADEWYN 1/14/2011 10:43AM

    Thank you thank you thank you! for reminding me to ignore ignorant people.. i guess i am just so sentitive to others comments i have never been this heavy in my life! and though i have learned to love myself at any size i just didnt need to hear such rotten statement from this woman... and i was proud i didnt slap her either lol..
But i will let you know i just took the calendar off the wall and put in my work schedule (which is all over the place) and took the class schedule and scheduled my life of exercise and work for next week and when i get my new schedule for the following week i will do the same.. so i have a standing apointment with myself!
thank you again!..i needed a slap :)

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140ISMINE 1/14/2011 9:45AM

    NO NO NO ... DO not let other people dictate how you will feel about yourself for the whole... Do you think that instructor lost any sleep over you? ... or do you think after she left that class she said dang I should not have spoken to her like that ? NO.. do not give her your energy... keep your energy and use it for urself.. I totally understand the time issue.. I face that everyday .. I get up at 5 am and i dont get home til 6, and I have two children and between childcare, church, my boyfriend and all the other responsibilities I feel like working out is not even an option. But think about it.. you cant do any of those things if you are not here... or alive... we have to take care of ourselves... Some days during the week I wake up at 4 to go to the gym for atleast 45 minutes.. It feels great .. I get in the shower get ready for work and i feel like a brand new person.. At first I hate it .. but once I am there I am glad I went.. I also read a blog the other day it says if you want to do atleast 30 minutes of exercise on a daily basis .. but you dont have much time.. break it up .. do 15 minutes in the am and 15 in the pm... we can all afford to give 15 minutes... Stay encouraged.. and excuse me but F$#@ all the other ignorant people.. they dont appreciate there size because they were never big.. the good thing is when we lose weight we will be all around good people.. compassionate to others.. .. Good luck and I am proud of you for not slappin that I will follow you .. emoticon

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missing my excerise classes today

Wednesday, January 12, 2011

Sitting here resting as the snow jeeps coming down.. already 18 inches and more still to come... waiting for it to ease up a bit to dig out my car... everything is closed today including the gym (as it should be) buut i am happy that my body is Craving workouts... I hurt alot today from the weather and possibly some from working out but i even said to my hubby last night lol half joking half not.. i said well i think i am back .. i am enjoying the zumba class and the body burn class i said i think i am becomeing a gym rat (again) lol..I am enjoying working out again (even though it hurts) i am making myself a priority and it feels good.. I ate to much yesterday because my hubby was home and i told him so when he made choc chip cookies and i had 2 (counted them in for the day) and he offered me a 3rd one and i told him thanks but i am over my calories for the day.. and he said oh im sorry.. i dont think til that moment that he even realized how much i eat when i am with him lol... so i told him no worries not a big deal just making him and myself aware of what i eat when i am with him...(i wasnt really over over just a couple of callories no biggie but it was the point of it)
So later i will go for a walk in the snow and clean off my car and tommorrow i will head to the gym and walk for a while (since there is no classes that i attend) and do some weights... friday saturday and sunday i work all day so if i work out it will have to be after work... but i wont beat myself up if i dont workout thise days.. i will just go on monday to 2 classes :D.. i am working on balancing work and working out and it will work... i want to keep this going because i am doing well i may not be seeing big numbers on the scale but a couple of my shirts are fitting better and my jeans are getting there...
take the little things :) i will lose and look good for the spring i have a photo shoot to do in the spring and i want to look fabulous for it :)
i think i have babbled enough for one day... stay safe if you are in Newengland today and remember to count shoveling in for your exercise!


made it a week

Tuesday, January 11, 2011

Very proud of myself.. I have made it a week of exercising and a week of traking food and water...I am still looking for a buddy to meet up with and do things but that will come... I am meeting people in my zumba classes and my body burn class that keep me coming back...I have lost 2 pounds this week... not a huge number but that will come... I lost 2 inches in my waist alreardy too.. so that helps with the motavation...I am very sore I have fibromyalgia amoung a few other things.. thank god for meds:) i have noticed increased energy and my body craving excerise.. this time it will work.. i have no doubt... onward and upward..have zumba class again in a hour and then going to decide if i go to body burn or not.. there is an hour in between classes which sucks lol... but if i make it to one class i will be doing well. :) since i have no one to cheer me on lol.. I must pat myself on the back.. good job! keep it up I am proud of you :) 140 here i come :)

  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

ADEWYN 1/12/2011 2:36PM

    thank you all.. i have tears in my eyes for al your praise.. we are all in this together and I appreciate you all taking the time to read my blog.. bright blessings

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PATTK1220 1/12/2011 2:34PM

    emoticon You are always your best cheerleader because you have to hold yourself accountable! Great job!


Comment edited on: 1/12/2011 2:34:44 PM

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SPARKMEAGAN11 1/11/2011 9:21PM

    I am cheering you on! Good work and keep going.

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AIKZILLA 1/11/2011 1:53PM

    Pat Pat Pat....Awesome job! Keep up the good work and you will crush your goals!



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back in the saddle

Wednesday, January 05, 2011

Well like i said I would I have been watching what I eat and been going to the gym... Went to a zumba class on monday night and a body burn on tuesday and this morning I an dressed to head to the gym this morning havent decided weights or walking...i guess i will see how many people are where in the place and which ever area is not as crowded will be where I am at... then i head out to No.Conway with my friend to visit with her sick mom (she is so cute) i will be back around 3 or 4 tomorrow and hopefully feel up to walking or something when I get back... I will call work on friday to see if they need me and if they dont I will head to a 9 am zumba class work saturday call in for hours on sunday if they dont need me go walking or something.. and monday either try a new class or do zumba at 630 pm....
i am starting to plan it into my day some how...i have the food down.. but havent lost weight because of my food intake... on medicines that pack the pounds on... so excerise has to be the key to all this... monday I weight myself and log it.. hopefully lose a few pounds which would be nice to keep me motivated.... I am hoping to meet a buddy at the club along the way.. someone to look forward to seeing in a class and perhaps even meet and walk or do weights together...
Had a hard time after I left class yeseterday.. there were a few things I could not do in class (not from my weight) but from my off balance from my medical stuff.. it frustrated me to no end.. no one else cared what I could do or couldnt do.. just me... very very frustrated... but i will do it again next week and do what I can I am proud of myself for making it thru 2 classes.. and still be walking :)
Onward and upward

  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

ADEWYN 1/5/2011 7:28AM

    I cant go off mine anytime at all either...They diagnosed me 3 yrs ago with Fibromyalgia and now because of a few more symptoms they are thinking early MS...So no more excuses it is time for me to take off some of this weight I have gone from not walking to being able to get thru (frustrated) 2 FULL classes... I have forced myself to over look the pain I have.. and push thru it.. I have to... i cant have 60- 70 poinds on me... what will happen if I ever end up in a wheelchair with that to start with. UGH... so no.. i have to fight my waythru this no matter how hard.. I cryed after class yesterday but got over the frustration quickly and told myself look how far you have come... I may never be able to dp the things i cant do in the class but I am there giving it my all and doing something healthy for me :)
Good luck to both of you also.. this is a tough journey.. and I am glad to have the sparkers on my side :).. off to the gym.. have a great day!

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MISSFORTE 1/5/2011 7:13AM

    You've got great planning I admire that! I completly understand about medicine and weight i am on 2 of those I've tried going off but can't yet! keep up the good work! Wishing the friends mother well!

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IMATYS 1/5/2011 7:12AM

    emoticon emoticon

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Trying this again

Monday, January 03, 2011

Had another wild year of doctors and medical issues... nothing new has popped up that they could find but there is something wrong when your whole left side is numb and you cant think at times and your slur your words or when you left side shuts down and you cant move it...I think I have early MS... but because my brainis not showing huge lesions on the mris they are thinking nothing is wrong... my balance is off i can cant stand on my tippy toes or my heels any more but there is nothing wrong with me... my left hand drops things throws things cant grip things at times but there is nothing wrong..

so frustrating... so Since there is nothing suppposedly wrong with me... I am back and trying to lose 60-70 pounds that i have put on since all this medical crap as started back a few years ago... I start this week with venturing back to the gym and eating better ....(now that the holiday pies and desserts are gone from the house)

Hoefully find a few buddies along the way to help keep me on track and make things fun along the way....

Stay tuned see if this works this time!


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