Sunday, May 04, 2014
My best friend lives 30 miles away and we don't get to see each other as often as we'd like. We have always been the very close to the same weight and body shape. And, though we both had the desire to change, I still felt comfortable knowing that I wasn't the only plus size walking into the buffet.
Cheryl had been trying for quite some time to shrink her waistline as her job in the Air Force requires her to maintain healthy measurements and fitness levels. She did all the right things but still was failing her measures. I felt terrible for her knowing what potential impact another failed fitness test could have on her career.
A few days ago, she called me and excitedly told me how she had not only passed her retest but had managed to shrink her waist an additional 3 inches below the required maximum allowance. I was thrilled and insisted we get together to celebrate with a day at the beach.
Though I knew of her accomplishment, it didn't really sink in until I saw her. It had been nearly a month since we were last together and the difference was astounding. I was so proud of her. And then it hit me. I just became Cheryl's fat friend. Of course, she would never look at me that way or think less of me. I know this beyond a. shadow of a doubt. But, in that moment, that's how I saw myself.
I can't, no, I WON'T be the fat friend. I reevaluated my situation and thought back to what I did in the past that proved to be successful for me. Writing everything down before it goes in my mouth and journaling my activities always kept me paying attention and making good choices. So, this morning, I cracked open a new journal book that is just the right size to easily carry anywhere.
I have always struggled with staying motivated. After seeing Cheryl's progress, I felt it in my heart, I will succeed. Cheryl's progress and my shame, is more motivating than I could have imagined.
Tuesday, May 15, 2012
Driving a school bus is a new experience for me and I took over a route for a driver who was leaving after having had this route for 6 years. These kids grew up with Mr. Bob and did not take well to the change.
I've been able to handle the little trials and defiance which I expected. But, I was totally taken off guard when one of my students (who until this point was pleasant and helpful) yelled out, to the rest of the bus "the bus driver don't like black people!" Despite me telling her to sit down and calm herself, she pressed on yelling out , "bus driver said she gonna slap the black right off you," and other derrogatory, inflammatory and completely untrue statements. This encouraged other black students to join in her tyrade. Then, she turned her attention to berating a few of the meeker 6th grade white boys calling them names which I cannot repeat in this forum. No amount of discipline would shut her or the others up and the next thing I knew, kids were getting ready to come to blows. Thankfully, I was at the next stop and most of the riotous kids left the bus. Once they did, the rest of them settled down. I had to write a full report and sit down with the principal the next morning. The instigators were suspended from both bus and school for the remainder of the week. We live in downstate Delaware in a very rural area; but the Jr. High kids all think they have something to prove and kno everything there is to know about life.
Completely separate from that...we know sooner got the kids to school on Tuesday, and we were sent back to the high school to evacuate them because someone had emailed a bomb threat to the district website. We had to shuttle them to other area schools for a few hours. Once the bomb dogs and cops cleared the building and grounds, we had to shuttle them back to shool. Shortly afterwards, it was time to take them all home. On Friday, the same thing happened all over again except this time threats were called to 3 area high schools all within 90 minutes of each other. Really...what are these peopl thinking??? In this post 9/11 world, bomb threats and terroristic threatening is no joke. I hope they catch the perpetrators of the hoax(s) and make a BIG example of them.
As if all this wasn't enough, my normally well behaved elementary students were all riled up like nobody's business. "Mrs. B, he's touching me...Mrs. B, she won't let me sit here...Mrs. B, (insert really loud banshee scream here) th girl behind me is touching my leg...Mrs. B...Mrs. B...Mrs. B!!!" Oh Lord...CALGON TAKE ME AWAY!!!! "Attention On The Bus!!! From this moment forward, there will be AB-SO-LUTE SILENCE on this bus! I don't even want to hear you breathing!" And a great peace fell upon the bus.
Throughout the whole week, I was dealing with allergy attacks. Wednesday morning I woke up with a sinus headache which stayed with me through Saturday afternoon.
My patience and attention span were tenuous at best. My workout buddy was dealing with a stomach bug and unable to meet up as planned and so my exercise and diet efforts went right out the window.
I think...okay, I HOPE...that last week was the worst I'll have to face. There are only 16 school days left to the year. As for the here and now, I am trying hard to stick to my original plan of diet, exercise and journaling. I am not going to let these trials ge the best of me. I have goals and I want to meet, or exceed, them as gracefully and proudly as I can possibly do it.
Monday, May 14, 2012
Allergy attacks, a 4 day headache, a junior high race riot on the school bus, elementary kids in an uproar, and 4 bomb threats.....the past week was horrible even on it's best day. All that and a 2 pound weight gain to put the cherry on top!
I need to get the upper hand on stress and weight loss. This is just totally unacceptable and any other gain would be more than I can deal with.
Saturday, May 05, 2012
I am completely ...(okay, maybe not COMPLETELY)...devastated by my scale this week.
I thought I was doing so well. I have been religious about following the bootcamp video workouts, getting 40 minutes of cardio daily, going to the gym, and making good food choices. I cut out nighttime snacking, too! So how did I manage to gain 1 pound this week?? I was expecting at least a 2 pound loss.
There must be a reason, though, for the life of me I can not figure it out. I am going to continue in the direction I had laid out and hope that this was a fluke. However, I will add to my routine, journaling. We've all heard it said many times that people who log their food and journal regularly tend have more success. From past personal experience, I can honestly say that I did better when I wrote EVERYTHING down.
Next week, I want to see the scale numbers in retreat!
Sunday, April 29, 2012
I am mre than disappointed to end my second week with the scale returning me to my starting weight of 205.
This past week of my challenge started off great with my participation in a charity walk for the M.S. Society. It was a beautiful day, I was with a team of friends I had pulled together for the event and we all shared lots of conversation making the walk go by so easily. The course was just under 3 miles throughout historic Dover, Delaware(our state capitol). I've captained a team each year for this event for the past 4 years and we always have a great time.
Monday was a good day as well. After completing my morning bus routes, I ran errands then came home and stayed busy with house and yard chores. My food choices were good ones and I began a new habit of having my larger meal at lunchtime as opposed to dinner. That habit held well through the week, but Friday and Saturday was a different story as my workday routine gave way for the weekend. Both nights found me eating a bigger dinner with my husband at a later time to suit his needs. This is not an issue during the week. Bill gets home from work and works in the yard until 7pm so I generally eat alone.
I can say, with certainty, that my downfall this week was the weather. It's a real struggle for me to maintain any kind of motivation when the temperature drops or it is anything other than snowy. All I want to do on cold and rainy days is to wrap up in a warm blanket and vegitate. While we did have a couple of sunny days this week, the temps had dropped to the 40's and the winds were whipping around at up to 25mph giving a windchill temp in the low 30's at times. You would have thought it was the beginning of March! I tried to get myself working out at home but it just wasn't happening.
So there I was on the scale staring down at 205 again. I logged into Sparks and came across the Official Spring Into Shape Bootcamp Challenge led by Spark coaches. I decided to join the team and the challenges immediately to help boost my own challenge. I am hoping this will give me some structure and discipline.
Fate must have been watching over me because I recieved a FaceBook message from a friend asking me to start going to the gym with her. Susanne's from Germany and relatively new to America, having married my husband's coworker this past September. We'd been getting to know each other better while attending Air Force events with our husbands. I also invited her along to the Philadelphia Flower show and out for an afternoon of bowling fun. Anyway, she asked me to join her as a gym partner because she says it is no fun to go alone. I agree with her whole heartedly and can add that I feel less intimidated by the "buff boys" if I have a friend to keep my mind otherwise occupied.
My plan to recover from this past week's setback is as follows:
1. Follow the Official Spring Into Shape Bootcamp Challenge- completing the 10-30 minutes of toning workout each morning before work.
2. Going to the gym with Susanne on Mon/Wed/Fri for cardio/aerobic workout as soon as my morning bus run is complete.
3. Adhering to my policy of eating a larger lunch than dinner and not eating dinner any later than 5:30 as I usually go to bed shortly after 8pm.
I think I will be able to keep to this plan of attack as I will have somebody who is expecting me to go to the gym with her. Also, my husband is going away on business from Mon though Thurs this week. With him gone, I will have no distractions while at home and beginning a new routine.
Now, if you will excuse me...it is for me on the Official Spring Into Shape Bootcamp Challnge and I need to get my toning video done whil my husband is still asleep.
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