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FAMILY UPDATE MUSINGS

Saturday, June 08, 2013

People keep asking me how we are dealing with my MIL's passing. How is your husband doing? He's fine. We haven't been devastated or tearful, just relieved. Last night we were at dinner with friends commenting on it and we realized that we had the opportunity to say goodbye to her and make amends for several months. We read to her, sang to her, shared memories, took care of her, talked about heaven, brought the kids in to see her, took her out, etc. My friends parents died suddenly within a week of each other and she didn't get that opportunity. WE are very grateful.

My husband spent time this week planning our trip to New Hampshire to inter her Cremains. She will share space with her husband and older son. My husband is so excited. We will spend a week there, visiting her old haunts, family, doing some geneology, etc. We are looking forward to it. Just he and I. Won't that be nice?

  
  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

JUST2OFUS 6/17/2013 7:35AM

    I found time with my Mom over the years was a great help when she died suddenly 2 yrs ago. I did get to see her and talk with her before she died and I also didn't cry or mourn much, then. It took months and I still have weepy moments, but they are not all bad. Just a missing her kind of thing.

Have fun on your trip.

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CYND59 6/11/2013 8:09AM

    Getting away may be just what the two of you need. It is always good to spend time with family. Have a safe trip!

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SEWINGMAMACDS 6/10/2013 10:18AM

    Even though it was hard during that time, looking back I'm sure you are grateful to have had that time. Have a good trip.

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TOWHEE 6/9/2013 12:00AM

    I was fortunate to say goodbye to both of my parents. It sure erased the "would have", "should have", "could have" feelings. It doesn't take the hurt away, but it sure takes the self-flagellation out of the process.

Have a wonderful trip.

Margaret


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MURRAYGOLD 6/8/2013 2:45PM

    Very nice indeed! I'm having some of those conversations with my mother now...helping her to relax, know that she is loved and I keep talking about my dad with her. Glad that your emotion is one of gratitude.

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LKWQUILTER 6/8/2013 1:23PM

    Have a wonderful trip. Yes, it is great when the family gets to say good-bye. I do understand how all of you feel too. ((HUGS))

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CARLANNIE 6/8/2013 11:12AM

    Very nice!

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KASEYCOFF 6/8/2013 10:57AM

    emoticon

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CAROLISCIOUS 6/8/2013 10:17AM

    It is good that you had time to say goodbye...as hard as it was. Enjoy your trip to honor her life.

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A WONDERFUL MEMORIAL AND WEEKEND

Monday, May 27, 2013

Friday was the service for my MIL and all of our family was here except my Sister and husband who had other plans scheduled to be out of town. One friend commented that it was the happiest funeral she had ever been to and we had numerous similar comments. We are so happy for my MIL that she is now at peace. Reality will set in I'm sure as I go through her things but that can wait.

I had planned a quilt for her using handkerchiefs that she had collected over the years. Sad I didn't do it but maybe I will someday and give it to one of my daughters in law.

My sister let my son and his family stay at her home. They have a swimming pool and Saturday, both sons and families as well as our nephew and his family were there. We had a two year old boy, (2) three year old boys, an 8 yr old boy, an 8 yr old girl and an 11 year old girl all swimming and eating all the available food. It was so much fun.

I guess my husband and I are now the Patriarc and the Matriarc. Hard for me to step into Grammie's shoes but I'll try and establish my own two feet. We will miss her.

My husband spoke at length at the service. And at the end, he sang to her. Her name was Marjorie and each night, my father in law would play the organ and play that tune for her. He sang the old song, "Margie". So nice.

Happy Memorial Day and thank you to all who have served. Including myself and my husband.

  
  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

LKWQUILTER 6/2/2013 4:31PM

    emoticon emoticon emoticon

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SEWINGMAMACDS 5/28/2013 11:55AM

    I know it is hard to step into the Matriarch's shoes - I did that when my mom died. Hugs to you. The hankie quilt will be special. I have plans to do so with my mom's and grandma's someday too.

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EBURGITE 5/27/2013 3:46PM

    thanks for sharing. i'm continuing to lift you up in prayer.

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MURRAYGOLD 5/27/2013 1:49PM

    A very fitting "goodbye". I made a quilt for one of my brothers using my dad's shirts...I loved working on it. Indeed, so grateful for your service and others.

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FIFIFRIZZLE 5/27/2013 12:47PM

    RIP Marjorie.

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KASEYCOFF 5/27/2013 11:33AM

    You know, that handkerchief quilt would make a lovely gift for your granddaughter - I remember you saying that you would take her to visit your mother-in-law. It would make a wonderful multi-generation connection...
emoticon

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CARLANNIE 5/27/2013 10:09AM

    It's nice that your family rallied for you, and that you had the distraction of all the kids. And such a bittersweet relief that she is pain-free now. And yes, thanks for your service!

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NEPTUNE1939 5/27/2013 9:50AM

    emoticon

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MLDRLD 5/27/2013 9:47AM

    Your MIL sounds like she was a wonderful lady. I'm so sorry for your loss; may you continue to find joy and laughter amongst the tears

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MEMORIAL SERVICE TODAY

Friday, May 24, 2013

Today is the day that we gather as a family to honor my MIL. Our sons and the great grandkids will be there and my MIL's niece and her husband who are both in their 80"s. My sister and her husband had another trip planned so cannot be here which is sad. Her son and family will be there.

My husband has planned such a beautiful send off for her. He sings barbershop and we have an amazing gospel quartet coming to sing and many of his other friends will be there as well. Our church is small but we expect a crowd.

I've been wondering what to wear and I decided to wear black pants and top and a hot pink silk jacket. Pink was Marjorie's favorite color and this will honor her. This is a celebration of her life, not a morbid and sad experience.

Thank you all for spending time with me these last few months. Now the healing begins.

  
  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

ANDI571 5/24/2013 9:52PM

    What a wonderful tribute to wear her favorite color. The barbershop singers sounds wonderful. emoticon

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CAROLYNVIL 5/24/2013 9:28PM

    so sorry for your loss,my thoughts and prayers are with you and your family.

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JUST2OFUS 5/24/2013 5:33PM

    Carol,
I just got back to the states and I am sorry to hear you lost your MIL. I am sending you a hug and many prayers. She is in a better place and no longer has any issues.

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FIFIFRIZZLE 5/24/2013 2:59PM

    One of my work colleagues has his father's funeral today, with family coming from all over the world. Funerals can be the best parties.

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COOP9002 5/24/2013 2:14PM

    Praying for you and your family

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JENNY888 5/24/2013 1:25PM

    Make it a wonderful celebration of her life. My thoughts and prayers are with you and your family.

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CAROLISCIOUS 5/24/2013 12:33PM

    So sorry for your loss. Praying for comfort for you and your family.
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KYMOM530 5/24/2013 11:19AM

    Sounds like a lovely way to remember her. May peace & comfort fill your hearts today.

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KASEYCOFF 5/24/2013 10:19AM

    emoticon

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EBURGITE 5/24/2013 9:13AM

    i'm praying for you and your family.

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SO MUCH TO DO...

Saturday, May 18, 2013

My mother in law passed away May 17, 2013. She would have been 94 in June. She certainly led a good and fascinating life, traveled in many countries and loved her 4 great grandchildren, her 2 grandsons and 2 wonderful great daughters in law. When you think about the life that these older citizens of our country have seen, the changes that have been made in the world since 1919, the year of her birth, it is amazing.

She was my MIL for 40 years, longer than my own mother who died at age 60, 34 years ago. We had our ups and downs like most would have but I always loved her and was very glad that she was my MIL. It will be a hard and busy week as we prepare for family to come and make arrangements. I will be busy. Thank you all for your prayers and concerns during the past few months and the time ahead.

  
  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

SEWINGMAMACDS 5/20/2013 12:27PM

    emoticon

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FIFIFRIZZLE 5/18/2013 3:14PM

    Take care of yourself and enjoy this special family time.

Remember to keep up the exercise, it will be a great help.

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CYND59 5/18/2013 2:53PM

    I will be thinking about you. I know you will be bust but I hope you get some time to rest.

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EBURGITE 5/18/2013 9:27AM

    so sorry for you loss. emoticon may God give you everything you need to walk thru this time. i'm praying for you, friend.

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My mother in law

Friday, May 17, 2013

My mother in law, Marjorie, passed this evening at about 7:30 pm. We will miss her but she is now at peace. Thank you for all of your prayers and concerns and support during this trying time.

  
  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

COOPQUILTLADY 6/13/2013 11:02PM

    Somehow I missed this blog. I am so sorry for your loss. You now deserve some time to relax after all you went through caring for her. emoticon

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DIANAOR1 5/18/2013 10:59PM

    My condolences to you and your family! emoticon

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CYND59 5/18/2013 2:52PM

    Sorry to hear that. Prayers for you and the family!

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JENNY888 5/18/2013 2:47PM

    I am glad she did not suffer more. My thoughts and prayers are with you for all you will have to do now. Know she is in a better place.

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CARLANNIE 5/18/2013 9:01AM

    My sympathies for you and your family. emoticon

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FIFIFRIZZLE 5/18/2013 8:38AM

    Now at rest.

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RAMALEX 5/18/2013 8:32AM

  Sorry for your loss, We lost my mother in law on May 2. emoticon

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LKWQUILTER 5/18/2013 6:49AM

    emoticon emoticon

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KASEYCOFF 5/18/2013 2:14AM

    emoticon

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FENWAYGIRL18 5/17/2013 11:35PM

    I'm very sorry for your loss emoticon

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EVIE4NOW 5/17/2013 10:34PM

  So sorry for your loss.

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