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So close back to my legitimate goal range in terms of the moving average that I can taste it.

Monday, December 05, 2011

This has been a rough year for me.

I was all set to get back into kayaking for my second season and then tore my rotator cuff snowboarding at the end of March.

I had hopes that PT would fix it, and set a goal of getting back into goal range, with a new boat as a reward. I worked hard at it.

Unfortunately the shoulder ended up requiring surgery, which happened in May.

I got back to goal range in late June. There was no point in getting the boat since my arm was still in a sling. I was unhappy about not being able to kayak. I gained 20 lbs back over July and August, feeling sorry for myself and indulging in food.

And then I spent Sept, Oct, and Nov getting it back off again. Which was not easy.

Now I'm just about back down to my legitimate goal range (in terms of my moving average weight).

Here's a graph showing this sordid tale:

You can see it full-size here:

The red line is my daily scale weights. The blue line is the moving average, that smooths out the fluctuations.

And I did eventually get that boat.

So here we are. I wanted so badly to be back here, and now it's kind of anticlimactic, actually. I mean don't get me wrong - I'm glad and it's a relief. But I still have cravings and the Food Season temptations are still posing a threat. And I'm looking down the loaded barrel of Shark Week, which doesn't help.

I'll get there. And I'll hang onto it long enough to enjoy my kayaking trip to Costa Rica where I'll tackle those tropical class III and IV rivers. And if all goes well I'll hang onto it beyond that, happily ever after, into the sunset.

And hopefully, if all goes according to plan with my strength training and high protein diet, I'll drop more body fat and put on more muscle. So I'll have a high strength to weight ratio and be able to do all kinds of Fun Stuff that takes a lot of explosive strength and endurance. Like eventually learning to do fun things in my playboat kayak.

Like this:
and this:
and this:

With the help of my friends on the At Goal and Maintaining team teams.sparkpeople.com/maintaining and with the help of our maintenance challenges, and sticking to tracking on my iphone www.loseit.com/ I think I can do it.

  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

WATERMELLEN 12/9/2011 8:45PM

    Anticlimactic? I get that. Maintaining is so much harder than losing . . . because the cravings just don't go away. Ever. Not for smoking, not for potato chips, not for . . . hmmm.

Fortunately we only have to hold onto it for about 20 minutes at a time and then the cravings fade.


Till next time.

Twenty minutes more!!

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KAYOTIC 12/6/2011 7:28PM

    Congrats on the challenge, and getting back into your range (almost!) I'm right there with you! This maintaining stuff is hard...and everlasting, but worth it.

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ANDALEX 12/5/2011 6:31PM

    you've got the right approach: dogged determination. your journey and your motivation are an inspiration to me. thank you!

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    That's a pretty tight range.

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4A-HEALTHY-BMI 12/5/2011 6:14PM

    I'm aiming for less than 3% swings in either direction... LOL

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    It also seems like you're getting this maintenance thing down. I was cherry picking data ranges and the volatility of gain/loss over the last couple of years has tightened. If you think about it, you went from 100 pound swings in the course of a year or two, now you're probably around 40 pound swings. Stands to reason that the 40 pound swings might turn to 30, 20, 10 as you learn to manage this better and better. I enjoy watching you succeed.

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According to RealAge I'm 40

Friday, November 25, 2011

I got this tradition from Don. www.sparkpeople.com/mypage.as

Every year he goes to RealAge.com to see what his "biological" age is.

I did it for this year:

2011 40.5

Here are some past years:

2009 38.6
2008 46.1

My actual chronological age? 46 as of Tuesday.

While it's sad to see my "virtual" age increase now that I'm in maintenance mode, it's still nice to know that I'm 6 years "younger" than my physical self.

I think I like the answer my scale gives, better. "26." LOL

  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

4A-HEALTHY-BMI 11/9/2013 6:47AM


LOL of course I wouldn't believe these results over a medical opinion. Good lord, what an assertion. They are just for fun!


Yep, I've got those records too, and they tell a very nice story! ;-)

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STRIVERONE 11/8/2013 9:29PM

    Ten minutes at the keyboard gave me ten+ years. If that assessment is only 50% accurate, I'll still be happy.

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LILY_SPARK 11/8/2013 2:41PM

    Nothing beats great, accurate blood panels BUT since you're doing this with some consistency -- and if the questions aren't changing -- it sounds like you're making healthy changes. Congratulations!

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HOUNDLOVER1 11/8/2013 12:24PM

    I did the test and was not very impressed. The way it is set up it missed a lot of critical information and missed both good and bad in my medical history. I would not rely on this. Better to talk to a knowledgeable doctor and get a thorough medical history.

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TAMIPCHICAGO 11/30/2011 4:35PM

    Not sure how accurate the "real age" site is. I took the long, long test, lol, and answered everything as truthfully as possible, and they said I have a real age of 55.8. I'm going to be 50 in a few months, and while being older than my chronological age isn't a good thing, I am certainly in a lot worse shape than what they think. LOL

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KAYOTIC 11/28/2011 7:02PM

    That's awesome! Great results!

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KHAYNES_WDE 11/28/2011 5:27PM


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DDOORN 11/27/2011 8:58AM

    Very cool GIFT to yourself! I was going to suggest you check this out since I was late to your birthday celebrations...but you beat me to it! :-)

You have so MUCH for which to be grateful this year! I don't know anyone that's been harder yet kinder to one's body than you!


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MOBYCARP 11/26/2011 9:15PM

    It gave me 49.1, compared to my real age of 55.9. I think the last time I looked, it gave me a real age of 58 or so.

I did have to use blood work results from Feb 2011. I suspect my cholesterol numbers would be better now.

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VARMINT3 11/26/2011 4:00PM

    I did this and my results are so much better than the last time I did it - 4.1 years younger than my real age - in fact, i think my real age now might be the same as it was then & it was a few years ago LOL! I give props to exercise - running and walking - really helped my numbers emoticon

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CARRIE1948 11/26/2011 8:22AM

    Way to go!

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WATERMELLEN 11/25/2011 8:17PM

    That's great to be 6 years younger!

Doing that right stuff has the right effect . . .

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FISHPOND7 11/25/2011 12:13PM

    Actually, that RealAge can be a real boost, or a good reminder to step up to the plate and start handling some issues. I'm 68 and my RealAge is 59.7. It's gotta be the rowing that helps! Keep up the good work on your kayaking; it'll keep you young.

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4A-HEALTHY-BMI 11/25/2011 11:08AM


It's a lot of questions, but one nice thing is that they save your past answers so next time you come in you can just change the things that are different.

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BREWMASTERBILL 11/25/2011 10:49AM

    I gotta say, this sounded intriguing, but I guess I didn't have the stamina or patience or whatever to complete the survey.

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Woo Hoo, back in my Happy Range! I've earned my NEW BOAT!

Thursday, November 24, 2011

My current maintenance "goal" weight is 155, with +/- 3% range around it.
(150.4 - 159.7) It's here that my body fat usually settles down to around 20% or below.


It'll take my moving average tracker a few days to catch up which is why my ticker doesn't show it, but YAY. I'm going to have my happy strength to weight ratio back. Where I can really DO things.

It's funny how much the difference in athletic performance can be, between me at 165 and me at 160 and me at 155. In my goal range my body can do almost anything I ask it to. I have markedly better strength, agility, and flexibility and I can propel myself much more effectively (on a bike, in a kayak, on XC skis, etc.)

I got there this summer and vowed I'd get a new boat when it happened.

But I'd torn my rotator cuff and couldn't kayak so I deferred the reward.

And then I gained 20 pounds in two months.

And then I worked hard to get it back off. Because that's what you do, when you never, Ever, EVER give up.

And then they had the boat I wanted (including the COLOR I wanted) on sale last month and I was close enough so I went ahead and bought it, anticipating I'd get here.

And yeah, I've already been using it.

But now that baby is really MINE. ALL MINE.

And to be able to keep fitting in it and using it I'll HAVE to stay here!

I ALSO got to wear one of my new Buffs as a reward and this really WAS the first time I got to use it. Here I am wearing it, this morning, after doing the exercise class sampler at the local Y

For more information about Buffs, see here:
I like them as rewards because they're relatively inexpensive, fun to wear while working out to catch the sweat, and they come in all kinds of colors and patterns.

I buy them in batches and then use them as rewards for staying within my happy range.

  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

ZIRCADIA 12/1/2011 2:31PM


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ANDALEX 11/25/2011 10:48PM

    yayy! congrats on achieving your goals! i like your reward system--good ideas!

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REDSHOES2011 11/24/2011 11:26PM

    emoticon emoticonWell done!

Comment edited on: 11/24/2011 11:26:59 PM

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DDOORN 11/24/2011 11:22PM

    How well earned and deserved! Looking mighty fine! :-)


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WATERMELLEN 11/24/2011 8:29PM

    YAY YOU!!

You look great: positively glowing!

I'm a great believer in bribery and rewards: they work. And you've earned it!

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SEPPIESUSAN 11/24/2011 12:04PM

    Congrats! I can't wait to be back at a weight like yours!

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ETMMEM 11/24/2011 11:27AM

    emoticon emoticon

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THOMS1 11/24/2011 10:09AM


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SALSIFY 11/24/2011 9:52AM

    Never ever ever give up.


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JOAN_HEO 11/24/2011 9:38AM

    Congratulations!!!!! Enjoy your new "wheels"!

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GEE-KNEE 11/24/2011 9:02AM

    Woo Hoo! Enjoy that boat!

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Look, Ma, no paddle!

Friday, November 18, 2011

Remember when I posted my first kayak rolling videos two years ago? With a paddle?

September 2009

A roll on one side

October 2009

Rolling on both sides

Well, now I can do it in one of my own boats with NO PADDLE! And here's proof!

Did I mention I spent almost all of the 2011 season out of a boat, recovering from rotator cuff surgery? That I wasn't even cleared to boat in rivers again until the beginning of October?

That arm in the water, doing most of the bracing at the end of the roll? THAT is the one that was chopped in May.

Good job, Drs. Maloney (surgeon) and Huson (PT).

  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

JOAN_HEO 4/18/2012 2:49PM

    Fantastic!!!!!! Congratulations!

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PATTILYNN224 11/22/2011 1:25PM

    I didn't know that was possible. I thought that was one of the paddles jobs in kayaking. Pretty neat. Glad you've healed well. :)

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KHAYNES_WDE 11/21/2011 11:15AM


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SNOWHIT 11/20/2011 11:03AM

    Congratulations! Learning to roll a kayak (even with a paddle) is on the lsit of things I'd like to learn to do. I didn't even know it was possible without a paddle.

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KAYOTIC 11/19/2011 6:33PM


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ANDALEX 11/18/2011 9:32PM

    that is so freakin' awesome!!!!!!!

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TRAVELNISTA 11/18/2011 2:35PM

    You are doing emoticon

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BOATER_CHICK 11/18/2011 12:03PM

    Wohoo!!! So exciting! I can't wait to get back in my boat and hit some pool sessions so I can get my hand roll too! emoticon

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DDOORN 11/18/2011 8:39AM

    Amazing stuff! Next thing you know you'll be bringing your kayak performance to the high wire...lol! :-)


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It's becoming about the athletics, not the weight loss.

Monday, November 14, 2011

I found myself writing a long response to one of MAGGIEROSEBOWL's blog posts, in which she wondered if not divulging the fact and magnitude of her weight loss meant she wasn't proud of it.

Here is part of my comment:

In a lot of ways I am prouder of my recent athletic achievements than I am of having lost the weight.

I can whitewater kayak better than almost any woman I know of at my age (mid-40s, formerly obese or not), and better than many men my age, and better than many folks I know who are younger, of either gender.

Lots of people manage to eat less and move a little more and drop a lot of weight. I know well over 100 people just here on SP who have lost 100+ lbs. Not a lot of them go from super obese into extreme sports and thrive.

I work hard at improving my skills and my strength to weight ratio, and it produces results. In the end I'm most proud of that. The weight loss for me is slowly just becoming history.


This is somewhat different from how I viewed my post-loss world when I got to goal in January 2010. At that point I'd bought into the idea spread here and other places that once I got to goal it was time to identify new goals and rush off to accomplish them.

Not so fast, buddy.

When I hit goal I still didn't know how much I needed to eat to maintain that weight, at my current activity level. And I compounded that problem by starting on a rigorous triathlon training program. (That was my exciting new goal.) All of a sudden I was burning way more calories than I had before and I didn't even know what my baseline food should be, let alone the food on the new exercise program.

It was a disaster, with cravings going through the roof, followed by binges, weight cycling crazily out of control, and a sense of confusion. Followed by a slow gain of roughly 30 lbs over the next 9-12 months.

Back then I was still in the "I can't believe I have this new body now" mode. It was like being on vacation from the fat. Like any honeymoon phase everything seemed bright and new and exciting, and a little scary.

Now, having carefully gotten most of those 30 back off again, I've settled down into a focus on my kayaking. I care more about kayaking than anything else. Specifically white water kayaking.

To figure out what is going on I still track everything. I follow it in charts.

And over time I've been able to see the correlation between my weight, strength, and performance. And now I have a much better handle on how much I need to eat and what kinds of foods.

I'm invested in attaining the highest strength to weight ratio I can get. I want to see how far I can take this.

And itís paying off. Saturday I went for a river surfing session in Watertown www.americanwhitewater.org/content/R
and managed ďsuper cleanĒ 180 spins (thatís turning all the way around without using a paddle, just the edge of the boat with balance and a judicious tilt of the hips). I nearly managed a ďsuper cleanĒ 360, (I got about 340 degrees around before flipping and flushing off the feature).

Here's what a super clean 360 spin looks like.

These are things I have not been able to do before. And I definitely couldnít do them the last time I was at that playhole, over a year ago. Iíve improved dramatically despite losing most of the 2011 season to a shoulder injury.

Sunday I went to a pool session and among other things tried (yet again) to roll my playboat without a paddle (using just my hands). www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_jo

AND I DID IT. FINALLY. Iíve managed it a few times in borrowed boats, but never before in one of my own.

These things arenít easy to do. And I donít think itís a coincidence that I can do them now, rather than earlier. Ever since being discharged from PT Iíve been working hard at increasing my strength by eating well (~150g protein per day) and working out a lot:

M - Tae Kardio at lunchtime, Body Pump Class in the evening
Tu - XC ski at lunchtime (if there is snow), Spinning in the evening
W - Tae Kardio at lunchtime, Body Pump Class in the evening
Th - Tae Kardio at lunchtime, Spinning in the evening
F- Rest, stretching, sometimes a deep tissue massage
Sa - Playing outside (kayaking, XC skiing, snowboarding, road cycling, etc.)
Su - Playing outside and 4hr kayak rolling / skills session

I am stronger and lighter. I have the physical strength to do these things and am not encumbered with as much fat. Small differences in this sort of thing can translate to big differences in athletic performance, when it comes to strength, agility, and flexibility.

Iím committed to getting the last 10-15 lbs off and getting my body fat below 20% again. Because that is what it is going to take, to do some of those aerial moves Iíd like to try.

And why not?

Itís no longer about the fact that I lost half my body weight. That happens to be my history. Itís about what I can now DO with this body, now.

  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

TENACIOUSTIGER 12/4/2011 10:13AM

    great blog something to think about you do an awesome amount of exercise

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GRACIELA_ELENA 11/16/2011 11:23PM

    Really liked this post and have to say though I dont often really picture my after point there are things I dream of doing...running, kickboxing and being able to wear something that my thighs can peak out of and not feel self conscious. Sounds easy enough and something I hold pretty close to my chest. Keep up the great work and thanks for the inspiration!

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WATERMELLEN 11/15/2011 7:43PM

    Really like this blog and your pride in your strength and skill: what you can do with your new/reclaimed body, not just that you "have it".

I haven't thought about this before and I'm sure it will be simmering in the back of my brain over the next little while.

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SALSIFY 11/15/2011 5:36PM

    Every time I've lost weight it's been like a vacation from the fat. I've always expected my fat to be waiting around a corner to mug me - and in the end it always does.

I'm glad to see you move on from this kind of thinking!

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ANDALEX 11/15/2011 3:54PM

    sweet! carpe diem, all the way.

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BOATER_CHICK 11/15/2011 3:28PM

    I am so excited for you! Don't back down on the boating! I am so excited to have a fellow girl out on the river that I can relate to! I can't wait till we can boat together again and the two of us can be like "ya, we rock".
Although my goal at first was the weight loss, too, I have now made it a goal to rock the rapids on the river. I have never felt better in a boat than I did this year after I dropped the weight. I can't wait till I am back in my boat and showing up all those guys up on the water. (That is my mini-goal, show up Jared, haha).
You will get those aerial moves in no time and maybe I'll get the chance to learn them some too. Then go off and run some class 4/5 :)

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SNOWHIT 11/15/2011 1:24PM

    Perhaps not the point of the post, but I love your spreadsheet! I'm a huge fan of spreadsheets and data. I admire your focus on performance as well. Goodluck in achieving your new moves!

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DDOORN 11/15/2011 9:50AM

    So so TRUE! Closing in on my 2,000th mile on my bike this season...an incomprehensible feat for the old me!


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MARATHONLADYR 11/15/2011 7:25AM

    Awesome blog and inspirational! It is not about the weight.

I can identify with this. After setting off to lose weight for the second time since 2008, I decided I wanted a stronger and healthier body...at 42. I started running in February, trained all summer, and just ran (and finished) my first half-marathon. Yes!! I want to become a stronger and faster runner, and I know I must eat better to do that. That's why I can identify with your struggle. It is hard becoming an athlete after 40!!!! I've been a couch-potato, although a skinny one, most of my life.

Well, the battle begins and ends in my mind! Like you, I have lost more than 40 pounds and have been real sloppy about tracking my nutrition. Gotta do better!

Thanks for sharing your journey...


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BREWMASTERBILL 11/15/2011 7:19AM

    *DING!* I find it hard to communicate precisely this. The scale just doesn't matter after you get into healthy territory. You have to shift from weight goals to performance goals. To illustrate, I am also up almost 30 pounds from my lowest weight, but I'm still in the same size jeans. Muscle anyone? I really don't care what the scale says, but I sure am worried about how I'm going to finish a trail race my friend just challenged me to or how I'm going to train for a volleyball team I've just been invited to play on. Of course, there is the ever present softball leagues and tournaments. What training can I do now to run a little faster, hit a little harder, throw a little further?

So when I see the goals of "lose 50 pounds" or "I want to be healthier", these seem casually set and easily abandoned. I know it's hard to imagine what you would do with a healthy body, but I'm trying to convey this to folks who claim to have no motivation. I would challenge that to say that they have no real goals. I see people who have no business looking at the scale getting excited or depressed over a meaningless number. It's really frustrating and I'm glad to be aligned with someone who "gets it". Thanks for this, it has sparked me this morning.

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MOBYCARP 11/15/2011 6:39AM

    While I'm not into any sport more extreme than running, the struggle to identify the appropriate calorie range for maintenance resonates with me. Yesterday I hit a new 25 year low weight again, and added back 200 calories. That puts my range 620 calories per day above where it was when I was trying to lose weight.

The major concern is whether I'll recognize and react if I back off the exercise either intentionally or because life gets in the way. Hopefully your example will help me do a better job of this than I otherwise might have.

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