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Another Week

Friday, August 06, 2010

Another week has passed. I can't say that I've had any great goals achieved. My husband is still out of work. The unemployment group is JUST now servicing his claim, so we are only three weeks behind from them. Yay.. whatever. I've struggled to stay within calorie range but I have for the most part. I've kept the emotional eating to a minimum. Had one emotional drinking day. Yes I know, it's a choice, my words. I made the WRONG choice. I've continued to work out. Yay... not as many days a week as I was, but that changes again next week. I'll be back on my 5-6 days per week. I think I needed a little time for me to recharge my brain, confuse my muscles with NO workout. I've been doing a lot of cardio though.

I'm not going to let this stop my workouts like I did in 2005. Daughter is going back to school, so there will be less pressure to be home when she is home (which is rare).

Just keep plugging away. That's what I'll do. Choo choo

  
  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

STRONGERLEANER 8/10/2010 1:02PM

    Just keep believing that positive changes will continue to come. I know it's hard sometimes. I lost my job THREE times due to lay-offs. All of the times I was laid off, the bosses offered me letters of recommendation but I never took them because I was so hurt. For the last lay-off, there were about 300 employees and more than half of us lost our jobs.

Keep up the exercise. It really helps with the stress and frustrations.

Good things are headed your way!
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Comment edited on: 8/10/2010 1:03:06 PM

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BARBARAROCKSIT 8/6/2010 9:57PM

    emoticon emoticon emoticon emoticon

Life and this road to health and happiness we are on is kinda of like the weather we have in Texas .. sometimes hotter than you can stand .. sometmes a bit rainy .. sometimes full of lightening .. and sometimes just good ol' sunny

Sounds like that was your week.

A few downs ... many more ups ... and still standing strong.

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ANDYINBC 8/6/2010 11:36AM

    You are awesome. I am so impressed by your determination to stay on track and more so by your positive upbeat attitude in the midst of a tough time. You can be on my team anytime! emoticon

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PAIGESMAMA 8/6/2010 11:31AM

    You are right it is all choices. You made a lot of good ones. Leave the bad ones behind.

Not emotional eating is huge. You have been under a lot of pressure.

Be proud of the (+) things and work on the (-) things. You are doing great.


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Is this week over yet?

Thursday, July 29, 2010

This has been definitely a test of my own words against me. I did not succumb. I actually have continued working out (unwillingly but did so) and watching my food intake. Those Little Debbie Swiss Rolls probably weren't a GOOD idea, but hey they were accounted for in the calorie range and I was still under for the day. Of course my daughter and I make an impromptu run to Best Buy and she looks at the clock.. it's after 8:00 Mom... Sonic... no, we already had dessert, no this time. So we had slurpees instead. hahahahah, still within calorie range. But I have to admit last night was probably the worst of my "bad" eating and still staying within weight loss calories, is probably pretty darn good.

Today was not the best of days. Absolutely bored at work. Go to the gym, get to the locker room, open my bag, pull out my shirt, pull out my shoes, where's my shorts? where's my sports bra? I know I picked them out and put them... oh, on the dresser. Because I was interrupted with the fact my daughter was still home. She's not supposed to be home, it's 7:00, her class starts at 7:00. Oops someone overslept. She was a lucky girl though, professor wasn't even there when she barreled in at 7:50. I don't even want to know how fast she was going.

Hubby calls me with news that someone had called him about a job. Yay.. then he told me the pay range.. not so yay. So he is still looking. Sent out some apps today, so hopefully something will come through. His daughter leaves this weekend so that will help because he won't have to worry about having to find a babysitter when he goes on an interview.

So this redirecting my life around my emotional eating.. well... it's a decision. I'm extremely stressed right now. I'm not exactly happy, but I'm not overdrinking, not threatening anybody with bodily harm, and not overeating. That sundae last night sounded really, really good. I could use some chocolate, helps the serotonins you know. No, Sherri, you've lost 20 pounds and you are still going down.

So the pros and cons come out.

Pros of controlling myself -
No weight gain
Knees continue to not hurt
Compliments coming from hubby about how I'm toning up (he's so superficial sometimes, that's another story)
Back doesn't hurt
Clothes fit looser
Old clothes starting to fit

Cons
Bloated feeling
Weight gain
Clothes too tight
Knees hurt again
Don't have any fat clothes, I throw them away OOPS


Ah the knees, they seem to show up on both. I kind of like that NOT HURTING. I think I'll keep my emotional eating and drinking in check. You know, we do have a punching bag at home and I have gloves... that might be the change in workout I need tonight to adjust my mood...

and the thought process continues........

  
  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

40PLUSANDFIT 8/2/2010 1:48PM

    So I will admit, I totally overdrank on Friday, did not workout all weekend and became a slug. I stayed within my BMR calories for food, but no workouts at all unless you count meandering through Home Depot a workout. All it did was overwork my brain into the I wants....

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STRONGERLEANER 8/2/2010 1:42PM

    I had a similar thing happen with my gym bag recently. It's so frustrating.

Hoping this week is a better one for you but it sounds like you're an "overcomer!"

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PAIGESMAMA 7/29/2010 7:24PM

    Just keep going. YOu are doing great, You have a lot of stessors in your life right now and you are plugging along.

You can do this!!!!

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MASONK 7/29/2010 4:53PM

    It sounds like you actually have a pretty good handle on the situation though it may seem out of control to you. You were able to rationalize how eating the sundae would have either helped your efforts or hindered them. Plus, the sundae may have tasted good, but it wouldn't ease any of the stress and the sugar might have actually made you feel more out of control.

Good job on saying no to the sundae.

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Still being tested

Thursday, July 22, 2010

So I went and re-read my last blog. Read that part about how I have to do legs and cardio the next day (I'm assuming it was Saturday). So what did I do... I did absolutely NOTHING in the gym this weekend. I kept my food intake fairly stable, but just took a couple of days off in the gym. Guess it didn't hurt too much, still dropped two pounds.

Anyway, now I'm totally getting frustrated. We have absolutely NO extra money, no way to beg borrow or steal and ... my husband only got two weeks severance. Okay, we have one more paycheck. I asked last night if he had been out to Monster or Hotjobs to look for a job. Nah, I have plenty of time. Uh... yes babe I love having you home as a house husband and the dogs love it and all, but.......... that doesn't pay the bills. I didn't say that I thought it. What I did say is, you got two weeks severance.. this was the first week. Hellloooooooo.

So I'm really close to going ahead and logging into his monster account, updating his resume myself and applying for some jobs for him. This is ridiculous. Babe I realize you're depressed about this, but you don't want ME depressed because I'm dealing with bill collectors every day. Anyway, I'm venting because I really don't know what to do.

Top that with my toe injury.. of course I wanted to start running this week. Well that got put on hold. It's only three weeks before my daughter heads back to college and we have to come up with stuff for that. This is just insane timing.

and of course what does my preacher preach about on Sunday... dealing with life and left turns and hardship. We had another event at the church and he said something to the effect, I know that was not the sermon you wanted to hear right after a layoff. Yes of course I have tears streaming during the service... it finally hit me that life has given us yet another left turn.

Then, unfortunately my bad side brain starts thinking you know S, you've had nothing BUT hard times since you've been with him. He's a great guy and everything, but your finances have gone to hell, you're depressed all the time because of the finances, etc, etc. The IRS screwed you over for getting married late in the year. Anyway there's a long story about him and his ex and what I had to deal with in the beginning, so those negative thoughts start creeping in. I know I would never leave him, but just the resentment starts to come up. Of course then I do what I did yesterday... go workout, come home and eat the already prepared meal, watch a little baseball and go to bed.. and leave him to take care of everything (cutting the fruits, cleaning the kitchen) and he doesn't come to bed grumbling at me. I remember how great he is.

  
  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

TEENY_BIKINI 7/26/2010 8:34PM

    Sending big hugs your way.

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JRIMM4 7/22/2010 5:33PM

    emoticon Yeah, I can identify with alot of that. We just have to keep plugging along, working on our own attitude, outlook and actions - and hoping and praying that the other key people in our lives will follow suit. The alternative is to do nothing, which simply spirals very quickly into a dark and nasty place.

JR

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SLEEKKITTY 7/22/2010 5:18PM

    Sorry about your situation and his, too. Try to work on staying healthy and calm. Hugs and good wishes for you both.

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VAMPS351 7/22/2010 4:22PM

    Im sorry to hear ure having a rough time, i will keep my fingers crossed that he will get a job soon.
Try to keep ure chin up, things have got to get better soon.
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ARCHIMEDESII 7/22/2010 4:03PM

    I can understand your hubby's depression and sneaking into his Monster account isn't going to help. When my brother lost his job, he went into a depression too. It's never an easy time. My SIL had him do odd jobs around the house when he wasn't out job hunting.

Do you need your garage cleaned out ? How about the basement ? Give your hubby something to keep him busy around the house. If he has something to do, he'll feel productive while he's looking for work.

Don't let him stagnant or the depression will get worse. Things are picking up. I am seeing "for hire" signs in my area. I can't tell you the last time I saw so many signs. So, there are jobs opening up. My brother did eventually find a new job. On the plus side, the basement got cleaned out !

Wishing you folks the best !

-- karen

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Getting my words tested

Friday, July 16, 2010

Okay I admit it, I'm an emotional eater. I've had self esteem issues of not being good enough, pretty enough, thin enough, smart enough for my whole life. Part of being brought up expected to be perfect. Therefore I expect perfection out of myself. Which leads to not making the grade and I go to food for my comfort. I've been lucky with regard to the fact that I've always played sports and for the most part exercised most of my life so I never got too heavy.. until this past year. Almost twenty pounds my pregnancy maxes.

All this to lead to.... I'm being tested. My husband got laid off yesterday. This is our fourth layoff in three years. Mine was in 2007 and the worst one because I am the primary breadwinner. We never caught up with that one and he had two more and now the third (of which we are still not caught up).

This is where I find out if I can walk the talk. Stay away from the pasta and comfort foods. Nothing I wouldn't like better right now than to make a good chicken fried steak with heart attack on a plate gravy.

Found this out last night at 5:15, went to the Grease Sing Along with my daughter and friend. Daughter and I ate asian food, barely ate a quarter, so I did fairly well there. Got home and had some calories to spare so ate some cheese and crackers. Okay, hanging in there. I packed my lunch. I have cash in my wallet, so Chick Fila could have called my name (I love the minis). I have eaten my yogurt. My emotionality right now is that I will do cardio instead of weight lifting at lunch because I just can't fathom pushing weights. Especially on leg day. Which means I have to make up leg day tomorrow and add cardio to it, so I get to work out twice as hard tomorrow. Maybe by then the tears will quit flowing and I will be angry.

But on a good note emoticon one of my daughter's friends came home from school yesterday and told me how skinny I was and what was I doing. That made me feel wonderful.

  
  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

ANDYINBC 7/17/2010 12:17PM

    So sorry to read about the lay off. I hope something new and better comes along. And congrats to you on keeping your focus on the right foods. Way to go! emoticon

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40PLUSANDFIT 7/16/2010 3:19PM

    Seriously I feel like I'm strong enough. This is way too many job losses and I can't even tell the bill collectors anything any more because I can't budget anything. It's so frustrating. Thank GOD our truck is hanging in there. It's been so used and abused, but hasn't given us any trouble. My daughter is getting ready to go back to college and I don't know if I can even get her any food supplies. This is just freaking insane. I'm sick of it, to be honest.

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MOMMYBYCHOICE 7/16/2010 3:10PM

    I just caught your blog.... wow!!!!!!!!! girl no wonder you play poker emoticon

you know for all the great things we say to folks let me add this famous quote.....

That which does not kill us only makes us stronger.....

author uhmmmm can't say for sure...

you are being tested and my aunt once gave me this analogy I love it.... life throws us a ball, curve , fast or whatever and some we can hit back and say no thanks, others we catch and some we just kinda get beaned with, the point being we get to pick they way we react.
you know we are not always required to catch them all Ally she would say..... but the ones you do catch have a lesson embedded in them, Learn the lesson become stronger... and move along to the next ball field. yeah I shook my head kinda like you are .... wondering what in the world is she talking about? then it hit me yep I got beaned.... lol

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40PLUSANDFIT 7/16/2010 12:03PM

    I play online. We have some people that we can get together once in awhile, but it's been a struggle lately.

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JRIMM4 7/16/2010 11:59AM

    Poker, Right on! lol Sounds super as long as your not spending more than whatever your budgeted amount of real money is. Do you have a group of friends you could pull together to play? My hubby did some of the local tourneys and played online with a couple different sites. This was back when he was working full time and he would purchase whatever his budgeted 'entertainment' amount was in chips and play till they were gone, sometimes it lasted the month and sometimes he was done in a couple days lol.

JR

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40PLUSANDFIT 7/16/2010 11:39AM

    yeah, I don't do crochet, knitting, gardening or any types of things like that. I play poker, maybe I'll just continue to gamble away play chips.

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JRIMM4 7/16/2010 11:35AM

    I really feel for you on the lay-offs. My husband has been laid of a number of times over the past 3 years - the first one was 2 months before my youngest was born and the same week his grandmother passed away. We finally made the decision last fall for him to go back to school - other than the summers being hard it has gone ok. Now my job is at an uncertian point so we will just have to see how it plays out.

Sounds like you've done a great job staying away from the emotional eating! SUPER! Some other great stress relievers were given - lately mine has been either gardening or reading. Ha! Very domestic sounding isn't it!

JR

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ARCHIMEDESII 7/16/2010 10:36AM

    Several of my co-workers have been layed off. We lost three people to layoffs last year. It would have been four, but one person found a better opportunity. That doesn't seem like much, but when you're a company of 20 employees, that's 25% of your workforce.

We've had other layoffs before. I keep wondering if I'm going to be next, but I've been told I'm safe. That's only because I can do a dozen plus different jobs here. Others who were let go were not as versatile as me.

We're okay and even seeing a slight upswing in our business. so, that's a good thing.

-- karen


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40PLUSANDFIT 7/16/2010 10:17AM

    Wow 23 years is unreal in this day and age. The longest I've made it is 7 and that was my layoff in 2007. That one hurt us the worst because I make the money. My husband seems to be okay with that, but I think this one is hurting him. Not sure if it's the letting me down or the emasculation feeling of not working.

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PAIGESMAMA 7/16/2010 10:14AM

    I am so sorry. That is a rough patch. 4 layoff's is just unreal. I have been at my job for 23 years. I started at 18 and will be 42 soon. I couldn't imagine losing my job. We have let a few people go with the economy.

I am here for you for any support you might need. I am so glad to hear you didn't give into food. I have the same issues with food.

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40PLUSANDFIT 7/16/2010 10:12AM

    oh I avoided the chick filet... so far I'm being good. I forgot to add to my post that one of my daughter's friends came home from college last night. I haven't seen her since last July (I think). Anyway, she was gushing at me. You're so skinny. What are you doing? Etc. So that was enough to keep me in check.

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ARCHIMEDESII 7/16/2010 10:09AM

    I'm sorry to hear that your husband got layed off. I hope he's able to find work soon.

So, what can you do to help you relieve some of your stress ? You've got to find better outlets for your emotions. Don't turn to food for comfort. I know that's not an easy thing, but there are other things you could do.

Instead of going to Chick Fil-a, you could have taken a 30 minute walk. Walking is excellent cardiovascular exercise as well as a great way to reduce stress. You could sit and have a cup of ice tea. Normally I would say have a regular cup of tea, but it's too hot. Tea is soothing.

Do you knit or crotchet ? How about sewing or painting ? Take up a hobby that keeps your fingers and mind busy at the same time. When your mind is occupied, you're less likely to take a nose dive into the junk.

If you've never taken yoga, I highly recommend trying yoga. Yoga has breathing and meditation techniques that can also help.

But, if all that seems like too much, then just take a walk. Remember, no one is perfect. Don't try to be perfect or you will end up frustrated. Take this one day at a time.


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-- karen

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Just blogging to blog

Thursday, July 15, 2010

So a couple of random things going through my mind. I heard on the radio this morning that there are more women than not out there telling people (even their DHs) "Don't touch my stomach"... Is this truly an issue? I've never said because 1. I love my stomach/abs especially when my weight is down. 2. I guess I don't really care. I didn't love the touching of the fat rolls when the pants were too tight, but I just cringed and didn't say anything. So.. are you one of those women.

Yay the scale is going down. I tried on my "skinny" pants, I'm about 5 lbs away. Exciting. Five pounds will get me in them tightly. Still aways from my goal and 16 pounds from my 2005 weight.

Working out at lunch is getting to be a bear. I don't know about you guys, but when it's 100 degrees outside and you've just worked up a sweat that won't stop, getting in the car is just ... I can't even describe it. I can't turn the a/c up enough. and I'm not really complaining because I love the heat.

So my entertainment for tonight and probably the best entertainment of the summer - I am going to the Grease Sing Along. I get to see Grease again
emoticon and I can sing along without the people next to me telling me to hush. My daughter is going with me and going with my friend and one of her other friends. Should be quite the interesting evening.

Well that's all for now. Ya'll keep exercising and moderating that food intake!!!

oh yeah, is burning 3500 calories through exercise a crazy goal? Sometimes I look at my daily number and think I'm insane, but that's not bad is it? I've pretty much hit that goal every week except last week where I missed it by 45, but.. am I putting too much pressure on myself? Hmmmmm, to ponder!!!! Can you guys tell I'm bored/?

  
  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

PAIGESMAMA 7/16/2010 10:36AM

    I go home and get my daughter lunch on my lunch hour. I don't like being sweaty at work. I don't like the heat like you so as it gets hotter exercising outside isn't not my first choice.

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MOMMYBYCHOICE 7/16/2010 8:46AM

    wish I could work out at lunch my work outs are ST training each time I go to the bathroom..... howmany squats can I do before someone needs the bathroom has become my lastest entertainment.

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JRIMM4 7/16/2010 12:47AM

    Have a supertime at Grease! I went to a similar event with my daughter last year. Tons of fun! It's one of her favorite movies.

JR

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