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This may be harsh

Tuesday, July 13, 2010

Okay, I qualified it at the beginning. I've been reading some blogs and posted and tried to be helpful and encouraging. We all have life get in the way. I truly will admit I was a whiner when I first started Spark. I set too lofty goals and I expect perfection out of myself. Ah, there is the key word "perfection". Anyway, back to the blogs. I see a lot of "I can't have this to eat, I can't have that to eat. I hear talk like when I meet my goal, I won't have to exercise any more. I binged yesterday and can't get over it. I didn't exercise for a week, two weeks, so on. I was too busy. It was my bike day but I couldn't get to it. I could have walked/run, but... anyway, you get the picture right.

I truly understand the hide under the covers depressions. I've been there. I understand letting the scale ruin your day. Been there more than once. I have made the statement also, why am I working so hard and nothing is happening. Life is full of surprises, twists and turns and it does screw you up.


You have to make YOU a priority. If you need to lose weight to improve your health, your self confidence, look better, it is all up to YOU. You have to quit making the excuses. You have to set limitations for other people that interrupt your schedule or mess with your food plan. You don't have to give up all your favorite foods. You have to learn how to moderate your intake. You don't have to eat the WHOLE pizza, or box of cookies, or plate of pasta (whatever your fav is). Mine personally is pasta and pizza. I could gorge on those forever and then go back for more. But.. I made the decision to moderate. You have to exercise. Even if it's ten minutes, just move your body. You have to quit telling yourself, well I screwed up my eating so I might as well quit. I didn't exercise yesterday so I failed. STOP DOING THAT.

Back to that word "Perfection". I am a total compulsive about perfection. My life growing up was if I couldn't do it right the first time, I won't do it at all. Did you see the word "won't" in there. That means I didn't even TRY. How can you go through life not trying. There are too many in the weight loss game thinking that if they can't be perfect every day, then they won't try or they give up. STOP DOING THAT.

This is a journey. Journeys take time. You didn't gain the weight in a day/week/month. It's not going to come off that fast. Yes it feels like it goes back on faster than it comes off, but really, it doesn't. A pound is 3500 calories, coming and going. I'm guilty. I had a spreadsheet calculating how many calories I needed to eat/burn to lose 2 lbs a week. My body told me NO.. I am not doing that. So I had to adjust my attitude to what my body was willing to do (kind of like my hair.. it does what it wants too).

Anyway back to the point:

Stop expecting perfection

Stop beating yourself up. Dust yourself off and get back on track.

Don't let the scale determine your mood. It will move eventually. If you are strength training, I promise you, it will take longer because that whole muscle weighs more than fat is true. But when that muscle gets there, baby it does start burning the fat a whole lot faster.

Stop making excuses.

Plan your food, it makes a huge difference. Believe me I don't like getting up that extra 15 minutes early to pack my hubby's and my lunch, but I do it because I know if I don't, McDonald's and Whataburger call my name. and I don't know about your finances, but it has saved us a whole ton of money. If you have that junk food in the house that you know you won't resist, measure and put it in containers or baggies with the appropriate measurement. You can add this to your nutrition counter and with it premeasured, less likely to binge.

Plan your exercise. If something comes up, find an alternative time. I work out at lunch. That's the only time I can be sure that I'll get my workout in. My body (which is my leader) refuses to get up in the morning, so I have to adjust what I can do. If I have to do something else at lunch, I find another time for my workout. I might have to move my day of rest to that day. Anyway, you get the picture.

The person in charge is YOU. Make your stand. This is for your health. This is for your self confidence. This is for YOU.

and I'm off my soapbox now. Thank you very much for your time and energy ladies and gentleman, now get out there and Move it, move it, move it. emoticon

  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

VIVIANJ5 8/1/2010 4:40AM

    I'm a little late responding to this blog entry, but I was reading your other posts, and everything you say rings so many bells with me...well, except the posts about the layoffs: my husband has been unbelievably lucky, and any job changes we've made have been our choice. Sometimes we do forget what a blessing that is...

But the emotional eating, the making excuses, the "just get on with it attitude" I'm so there. I get tired of hearing myself whine, and although I still do it, I'm making a conscious effort to be more positive in my attitude and in my posts. So everything you're saying just hits home.

You are taking care of yourself, and in the grand scheme of things, that's about all you can do. Jobs will come and go, but your health isn't something to play with.

Take care!

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MINDAC20 7/19/2010 10:09AM


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FUNTIMES2 7/15/2010 4:05PM

    I read your blog from Tuesday and I love, love, love it!! You are sooo right. My favorite comment was " stop beating yourself up" I do that all the time, when in reality - I am doing great! I've lost 15lbs. and feel good. I can't let one bad day (no exercise or whatever) get me down. Thanks so much - this post is just what I needed to day! emoticon

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ASHLYNMOM 7/14/2010 12:05PM

    Nothing like the cold hard truth to wake people up! Thanks for saying what so many of us are thinking as well as need to her ourselves!!

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KISSIELAR 7/14/2010 10:37AM

    Great blog!!! Great reminder that we all can do it!! emoticon

Comment edited on: 7/14/2010 10:38:40 AM

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KAKIPOPUP 7/14/2010 8:47AM

    Just like anything else, harsh works for some but not for all....

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THEMRSH 7/13/2010 10:54PM

  Love it! I love it when folks tell it like it is. Great blog, I really enjoyed reading it. I'll keep it in mind to push myself through the rest of my week!

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DAWNDMOORE40 7/13/2010 8:58PM

    emoticonI agree that in order to lose weight, you have to be out with the excuses, in with success! emoticon emoticon

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PAIGESMAMA 7/13/2010 8:40PM

    These things are all so true and I have said them at one time or another. I am working on these things as I type.

(-)gets us no where.

Thank you so much for reminding me of all of these little things.

I am the only one who can change me...

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SLEEKKITTY 7/13/2010 6:53PM

    Pick ourselves up and move on with no guilt.

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NINJALINDA 7/13/2010 4:01PM

    Amen, sister! Awesome blog!

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CHAOTICMOM4 7/13/2010 3:54PM

    This is so true, I've lost so much 'baggage' since I stopped demanding perfection.

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JRIMM4 7/13/2010 3:12PM


That is the mental shift it takes to truly be succesful - I know for me that is the difference between today, and every other time in the past that I was going to 'get healthy'. It's the difference between *trying* for 2 weeks and giving up and just steping out and doing it, and keeping on doing it wether today was a *good* day or a *bad* day.


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WATRUMP 7/13/2010 3:11PM

    yea...yea...yea.....to bad that is not an audio message..when I get into that waaaa phase I could play it while I shower in the morning, speaking of the waaaaaaaaaaaaa's I haven't really visited that since I started exercising consistently...uh oh...epiphany....it will be tomorrow's blog.....

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Well this was interesting

Thursday, July 08, 2010

As I stated in my blog earlier, I didn't deprive myself of brisket and other items during the July 4th weekend. Actually had some junk food that I absolutely love and haven't had in a while (Gardettos, mmmmmmm). I didn't overindulge, tried to keep everything within an ounce or two. and that's what it's all about. Lifestyle change is not about depriving yourself. It's about making choices and moderating those choices if maybe it's not all good for you. I am not a body builder, never plan to be a body builder, so I am not going to be 100% good on the clean eating. I love pizza, I love Gardettos and all those carb loaded foods.

Anyway I digress. I've been on a plateau for 3-4 weeks. Pretty much since I returned from our trip (maybe it's all the salt water in my system). Got a little frustrating as the inches weren't moving either.. and the doctor tells me no weight lifting for two weeks (stupid doctor). emoticon Yesterday the scale moves. It was only a pound, but it moved down. Yesterday I increase my leg weights (doctor said arm weight lifting, not legs). Yesterday I finally have a workout where I'm sore following the workout. I did overdo something yesterday because I was having trouble breathing when I did cardio after work. Still trying to figure that one out. I think it was heartburn, oh bother.

oh and the second thing, got a compliment today. I just feel that nobody is noticing. So if nobody is noticing, then something isn't happening. Got the "girrllllll you're looking good". It was from a female at work, so no I won't be filing sexual harassment charges hahahahah emoticon

Just have to get in my mind. Don't let the scale ruin your day. It will come off, just moderate yourself. Oh and to end the day yesterday, I found out the calorie count of bratwurst... whoops... what can I say. My hubby said I could have it since I burned 1000 calories with my two workouts. Hey he was cooking, why fight it!!!! emoticon

Woo hoo!!! Lady at the gym told me I was getting "SLIM"... I've never been told that. Yay!!!

  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

SLEEKKITTY 7/13/2010 6:56PM

    I let myself have pizza every other week. Since I planned to do it, I feel OK about it. Total deprivation doesn't work for me

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MALIBUGIRL0310 7/8/2010 6:49PM

    emoticon Hang in there...progress not perfection, once you break through the plateau, it will come....... emoticon

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PAIGESMAMA 7/8/2010 10:17AM

    You are so right. This is q new way of life and I can't deprive myself of pizza either. It is all about not eating half of the pizza. Have some and don't over do it.

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Second Half of the Year

Tuesday, July 06, 2010

So July 1 has come and gone. It's the second half of 2010. Have you reached your goals? Have you reached half of your goals? Are your goals too lofty?

I can honestly say my goals were way too lofty. I am not one to deprive myself for a goal. If there is cake, I will eat it. I will adjust my calorie expenditure or intake somewhere along the line, but I keep seeing all these comments like you can't eat pizza any longer or cake or cookies. Well, if you have a sugar addiction, yes I can see having to cold turkey the cake and cookies, but pizza???? No it's not leaving my diet. I will moderate my intake of it. BBQ as we had plenty this past weekend. Was I going to deprive myself of brisket because I had goals? My goals can be adjusted. I do not have to be at a certain weight by a certain time. Just as long as I eat healthy and moderate my plan, the weight will come off. I haven't worked out in three days. I'm having a little bit of spasms because my body is used to it and telling me it's in withdrawal, but I'm back in the gym today. I'm not going to gain that 14 pounds back in three days (ew that would be ugly). But yes I fell off my wagon for a bit, but I knew what I was doing. I moderated my intake because I knew I couldn't get to the gym. I was lazy. But, my body needed a break. I was pushing it too hard i.e. the tendonitis in the right elbow.

Today is a new day. I have to set new goals and readjust my thought process. Yes I wanted to lose two pounds a week. Well, my 47 year old body says no, it won't do that, no matter how many hours I put in at the gym or how many calories I cut from my diet. I have to adjust it down to one pound per week, one and one half, if I am lucky. I just have to go and make workout and food choice goals now and the weight will come off. I have to make exercise plans that shake up my routine a bit, although I never really did keep it standard, it looks like my body thinks I did.

I believe everyone should go back, look at your expectations, your goals and your what actually happened and re-evaluate and set new goals. Don't lose sight of what you want, but keep going at it, maybe adjusting because your body is telling you to adjust. Or if you were kind of sticking to the plan, maybe it's time to really stick to the plan.

Come on people, let's get moving and finish our NEW goals before the year end. Yeah, this was a random rambling post.

  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

HILDABRAND 7/7/2010 10:43PM

    I'm so glad to hear you say that! Life is no fun if you can't enjoy it that includes when we overeat and feel awful. Keep heading in the right direction.


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MOMMYBYCHOICE 7/7/2010 11:25AM

    slow and steady wins right???

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PAIGESMAMA 7/7/2010 10:40AM

    Great thoughts and ideas. One pound a week is great. You are working to reach your goal and one pound at a time is great.

Have you ever seen the poem about just one pound. It really makes you think.

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SHARONGD 7/6/2010 10:56AM

    Good blog.....you always need to re-evaluate what you do and can actually do at least every 4-6 months....enjoy life and live! You always need a break every now and then...just get back to it and stay focused and determined and you can and will succeed! There is no time limit on getting healthy and changing a lifestyle. Congrats to you! Sharon emoticon emoticon

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Staying the Course

Tuesday, June 29, 2010

So even with my distorted body image, my body feeling like I've gone into hyper fat mode (feel bloated and fat), I still went to the produce store and bought fruits and veggies and cut them up and divided them for lunches last night. Then my neighbor gave me a TON.. did I say TON of squash, zucchini, some squash I don't recognize. Anyway, way more than we can handle, so I need to figure out how to freeze some of it. I got some sleep last night. I think maybe that might be affecting the weight loss too as I haven't been sleeping well. We got rain in Texas finally yay. My trees, house, grass and flowers are very thankful. That and my electricity bill as the temp dropped ten degrees.

  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

GINGYCAT40 7/2/2010 2:44PM

    emoticon emoticonGood for you on buying all those fruits and veges. Planning and cutting them up I find is an important tool..then they are ready to grap and go.

Heat and Humidity can do wonders to our body's and retaining fluid also studies have shown that adequate sleep is important for health and weight loss.

Keep hydrated and keep positive all will work out. emoticon emoticon

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PAIGESMAMA 6/30/2010 8:48PM

    Great job buying veggies. This is the time of year I love. All the fresh fruit & veggies. Enjoy.

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ARCHIMEDESII 6/29/2010 4:25PM

    Good for you for buying all those veggies ! Might I suggest a nice veggie lasagna ? It's really easy. You alternate layers of zucchini with layers of pasta, riccotta cheese and sauce. yum... also, all that squash will cook down. so, while it may look like a lot right now, it will be less once it cooks.

As for bloating, it's hot and humid out even here in Boston. So, I can't even imagine how hellish it is in Texas ! ugh... you're probably bloating from the heat. perfectly normal. this will pass, just make sure you drink plenty of water to stay hydrated.

You'll be fine !

-- karen

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Distorted Body Image

Monday, June 28, 2010

So last week I'm complaining because the scale is not moving. I'm still a little frustrated with that because I did half-hearted measure today and the inches are not moving either. We went to the pool yesterday and I put on the ole bathing suit. Okay in my mirror, I look okay, not great, but okay. I will actually get in the pool. But I walk back to the grill area and see my reflection in the window. Oh yuck, what am I doing. All I see is dimples of cellulite, all over. No my stomach isn't flat like it was at home. WTH is going on.

Then an hour later my husband is looking at me. Babe, you're almost there, getting to Jamaica shape. Huh??? I'm 20 pounds from Jamaica shape (five years ago). Who's got the insane brain here?? I didn't say anything other than thank you honey.

  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

HILDABRAND 6/28/2010 4:36PM

    I would so love to be close to 20 pounds of my goal! And I am so with you and where you are. My husband held up my jeans and said, "These are really small!" I didn't think so, but after putting on the "big ones" I have to say he was right. Compared to where I was it's a big change. Step back from time to time and see where you've been. Don't just look at where you need to go or where you are. 14 pounds is cause for celebration. Do something nice for yourself!


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MOMMYBYCHOICE 6/28/2010 12:16PM

    ahhhhh I could have written this myself.... don't you think we are our own worst critic? and the other thing I just want to add is look at all the (+) things you are doing AND.... check this one little detail out.... ever notice those really skinny girls notice them the next time and just see how they jiggle... working out like you do you have got to be toned and tighter I am so sure....

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ALISSAB2 6/28/2010 12:08PM

    Remember we are our own worst critics!! People do not notice every little "imperfection", that "we" do!!!!! Keep smiling, and be up beat, you will look slimmer to the world!

But, I feel the same way about myself, friends, and people @ work tell me, "you are fine, you don't need to loose weight"....but I know better...I have seen myself naked!!! LOL!!!

I have a LARGE frame, ladies clothes do not fit my shoulders, so I have to get men's or "plus" size, to fit my top half, but my bottom half(below the GUT), is much more acceptable!! LOL!!!

Just keep working, and pushing yourself emoticon

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JRIMM4 6/28/2010 12:04PM

    As everyone else pointed out, we are hardest on ourselves, we see more flaws and 'issues' than anyone else does. Yet when we look at someone else we are so much more forgiving. I often wonder why we reserve that forgiveness for others but are so tight fisted when it comes to giving it to ourselves. Don't discount either, the difference a specific mirror can make in highlighting or hiding flaws. I say stick with your mirror at home its sounds kinder! Who cares what that nasty piece of glass a the pool says! You've made great achievements and should be proud!


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MONTANA_ED 6/28/2010 11:54AM

    We are always hardest on ourselves. I'm brutal with my self image - but I just figure
"all in good time". All it takes is a glance at what I used to look like to snap me back to where I am now. Hang in there - you are doing great...


emoticon emoticon emoticon emoticon

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SHARONGD 6/28/2010 11:48AM

    Stop being so hard on yourself....14 lbs is a great acheivement...sometimes it is the hardest to see yourself...even with all my weight gone I still have that fat girl in a mirror somedays....I'm sure you're doing the same thing! Quit looking for the negative and concentrate on the positve...I like to focus on my eyes and hair...I like both! Why look in the mirror from behind upside down to see if we can find the celluite nobody else ever looks at!
You are doing fantastic!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
!!!!! Keep it up! Be proud of yourself....I'm proud of you!
Sharon emoticon emoticon

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SIMPLY-EVA 6/28/2010 11:38AM

  14 lbs is great! Cant wait till I can post that! Keep up the good work!

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DRASADAF 6/28/2010 11:28AM

    i totally agree with Archimedes....

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40PLUSANDFIT 6/28/2010 11:27AM

    Thank you for all your posts. And in answer yes I'm strength training. On hiatus for another week because of tendonitis, but still doing my leg exercises. I train fairly heavy (hence the tendonitis flare up), so yeah I'm aware of the changes that it does to my body. I am still working on sleeping better. I'm not sure what is going on with regard to that. Never had the wheezing, but have noticed that the pain in the knees going downstairs is greatly reduced. Of course that might have a little to do with 14 less pounds being pounded going downstairs. I know I shouldn't be frustrated but I like change and of course want it now. Have to be patient with myself.

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ARCHIMEDESII 6/28/2010 11:21AM

    We are our own worst critics. Don't assume that you're not making a change to your body because the scale and inches aren't budging. Remember, this is not the Biggest Loser. You will not see dramatic changes like that. It's just not typical.

Are you doing any strength training ? If not, I'm going to encourage you to start with a day. If you really want to change your body, that's how to do it i.e. with strength training. Now, you won't see change overnight, but you will with time and practice. Don't be afraid to increase your lean muscle. You will not look like a body builder if you do. Women do not pack on muscle the same way men do. However, we both benefit from a good strength training program.

I'm in my 40s and have been strength training for a couple of years. I wish I'd started a lot earlier because it really has made a huge change in my body and health.

And once again, don't assume that because the scale isn't moving that you aren't making a change. Are you sleeping better ? Do you have more energy ? Can you walk up stairs without wheezing ? How many push ups can you do ? How fast can you run a mile today as compared with when you started ? How's your cholesterol ? How's your blood sugar ?

All of the above are indicators of success that have nothing to do with the scale. So, don't get down on yourself because the scale isn't moving. Remmber, there is more to good health than a number that stares at us from between our toes in the morning.

Also, when you're on the beach, NO ONE will care what you look like. everyone is going to be doing there own thing. They only thing you have to worry about are all the vendors who will be trying to sell you something. LOL !!!

Nah, don't worry, you're going to have a wonderful time !!


-- karen

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GINGYCAT40 6/28/2010 11:14AM

    Hey girl, I can totally relate to the "scale thingy" since I joined Spark the end of April -OMG 2 months ago, I have not seen much happening on the scale. Up 1 down 1 down 1 up 1, you know the drill. I keep trying not to put all the power in that scale demon. But I have been getting comments like:
"OMG girl look how fantastic you look" A co workers called me "Slim" I am working on tracking healthy foods daily/water and exercise and more exercise. Also working on changing the exercise as I think my body was getting used to the "walking"..now doing walking/turbo jam/weight training and Wii fit Plus.

Look at the comment your hubby made. " Babe, you're almost there, getting to Jamaica shape."

That is awesome emoticon emoticon

I think we are too critical of ourselves and I agree with Skywatchers comments "don't beat yourself up or stress about it, love yourself as MUCH as yoru hubby does" well said girl

LOVE LOVE LOVE you are doing great girl emoticon emoticon

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PAIGESMAMA 6/28/2010 10:59AM

    Well he sees you are moving in the right direction. We have a harder time seeing it. We want to look like we did when we were 20 and unfortunately that isn't going to happen. We just need to get our bodies to best we can for the age we are now.

I am coming upon 42 and have a little one turning 4 soon. So I will never see the 20 year old body again, but it doesn't mean I can't get healthy and in shape and have a good 42 year old body.

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SKYWATCHERRS 6/28/2010 10:57AM

    I can totally relate. I tend to see the flaws in my body, too, but I'm working hard on letting go of that stuff. I like it better when I am in "love my body" mode - I feel sexier, fitter, stronger, happier.

It's a d*mn shame that we are socialized to believe that we are not beautiful unless we look like a supermodel. We abuse ourselves and torture ourselves so much to that end. It's got to stop.

Don't beat yourself up or stress about it. Love yourself as much as your hubby does.

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