Saturday, February 19, 2011
You know those contests car dealerships have to bring people in, where they offer a chance at winning a free car? I got one of those and since I'm in need of replacing my car I thought I'd go. Well, long story short, the guy who helped me was adorable/very good looking, kept making me laugh, and did a little hitting on me. But he was also laying it on pretty thick, is from Cali and always traveling from state to state helping run these events at different dealerships, and with that much charm he could probably have a girlfriend in every state he visits. So eh, whatever. But it was fun to hear all that from an adorable guy. haha
I realized today my boss just wants to be angry about something. She makes stupid comments to try to jab at anything that makes her feel uncomfortable or that she feels is showing her up. So when I'm standing there saying that instead of spending several hundred dollars on a huge computer monitor stand that will not work for me (it puts the monitors so close I would practically be living inside them AND takes away too much desk space I need) that I would like to order a $50 stand that might work and if it doesn't we could probably just return. She threw a boss's form of a tantrum. She was pissed when I said I can't do the same setup that she has because I already bang my knees and that would make it worse. She had the nerve to tell me that I should just not wear heels and that would fix everything. Well, let's see, if I bang my knees when wearing flats also, how does that fix anything? Seriously, get over yourself! People think she is so great at what she does; she might know the job, but she is a fail as a boss. Cutting down your employees is not good. Oh and I am not a moron. Stop wasting everyone's time by continuously 'teaching' me things I learned 2 months ago. Stop 'teaching' me by explaining the most mundane and obvious things to me that I know more about than apparently she does. And she needs to get to a doctor because coughing up a lung 10x/day to where not only is she about to throw up but so is everyone else is NOT HEALTHY. She sounds like she's got lung cancer or emphysema - not even joking. It is incredibly disgusting, she is spewing horrible things into the air right to my desk, and when you hear liquid spilling, you can't just ignore it and keep working. DISGUSTING! (Sorry for this rant, but I seriously wanted to just slap some sense into her.) Oh and I think I'm either going to have to buy my own stand, or talk to the computer guy and see if he can give me any other options and if he can convince her to let him do it.
I'm sure a lot of you have heard about what is going on in WI. My sister is a 1st grade teacher in a small town in WI and I talked with her for a little while tonight to get her take on all this. I don't want to argue politics, but from what I'm seeing, this is not about the money - it is about the WI republicans trying to take away the rights of their constituents (the right to collective bargaining). According to some studies, this will not save any jobs, in fact for teachers it will cause a loss of tens of thousands of jobs across the state as the funding per student will drop quite a few hundred dollars per student and will force layoffs, schools closing, and destroy the education system to possible unrecoverable limits. It is disappointing that politics are being reduced to this level of threats from our elected representatives. Also, know that I don't believe either party is entirely good or bad, but some of the choices that have been made by one side or the other lately has been just ridiculous.
Okie dokie it is bed time for me. I hope my sparkfriends have a good weekend!
Friday, February 18, 2011
I'm not sure if those who read this will think I'm strange, but I think this was creepy... About 2 hours ago I heard the wind whistling with a hard gust and looked outside. I saw this strange blue light shining in my front yard. Thinking my neighbor was doing something strange (aka illegal) again, I decided to peek my head out. A few steps outside my door I looked up and realized what it was - the clouds were racing past the almost full moon but there was a break and the moon was absolutely blue. I mean it was a form of bright baby blue. It creeped me out! I've seen a bright full moon before. I've seen a clouded moon. I've seen a halo around the moon due to ice crystals in the atmosphere. But I've never seen the moon in that shade of blue. Why did it creep me out? I have no idea - it just did.
For those of you who read my blog about my really strange dream I had a few months ago, did you catch CSI tonight? I had it on and was kinda paying attention. At the end when Bieber got himself shot and killed, I was actually cracking up laughing. I'm sorry if a fan of his reads this and gets upset, but I really don't think it was a decent dying scene. It was hurried, the blood was completely unrealistic, and his fall was ridiculous. So I hope I don't have that dream again because it will probably take a really disturbing turn. haha
As for my health issues, I realized I'm losing weight on the weekends when I sleep in, only eat about 1800 calories, and spend the day on the couch, plus I'm so much more tired when I'm under 2000 cals. During the week I've been around 2300-2500 cals/day, and I'll gain back the few pounds I lost during the weekend then maintain until the weekend comes again. Though today I've gotten over 2600 cals and I'm still hungry. Seriously, I wish I could suck out my metabolism and give it to some of my sparkfriends like a blood transfusion. I still say it makes absolutely no sense how I could go from my gastroparesis acting up and hardly being able to eat to having superhuman metabolism in such a short amount of time. My masseuse is probably part of the cause, but I'm sure that's not the only reason.
The other day I got one of these car dealership contest gimick mailings. I think I'm going to use it for an excuse to go take a short look at some cars tomorrow after work. Chances I'll win something: quite small. Chances I'll be annoyed by the salesmen: quite high. But I can use the time to get a look at some cars at least. No buying will happen though.
Wednesday, February 16, 2011
I was thinking about going out tonight to see my friends CherryGun at a bar just a few minutes away. Unfortunately, I was already fighting falling asleep at 6:30, so I just couldn't do it. They weren't due to take stage until 9:30 and will probably go until 1:00. Since I have to be awake at 6:00, I just couldn't do it. They have another show around an hour drive away on Sat the 26th I might go to, since it will be also be a party for the guitarist's 40th birthday.
Otherwise I'm just trying to hang in there. I'm so tired I can't think of much else to talk about. So as soon as the news ends in 20 minutes, I'll be getting in the shower then heading to bed. G'night!
Tuesday, February 15, 2011
So I finally was able to answer the phone when the guy called, so I could tell him we're not compatable. He seemed to want to argue, but I was set. Everything I brought up about me that was different from him he said it didn't bother him. So I had to turn it around and point out that I needed to be around others that will support my choices and not trend me towards things that are unhealthy for me. He still didn't get him. So I brought up his partying and drinking and he said he wasn't that bad. Except he completely didn't remember drunk dialing me and asking to drive to my house to sober up. That proves he is too out of hand for me to be willing to be around him. I just hope he understand that this is the way it will be and that he won't try to argue it.
And just as I typed that I get a 4 message long text from him. He sounds too nice in it, which worries me - that's my nature. I figure I'll just see if anything happens from here. I can be friendly with him to a point if he doesn't push anything. But I think the maturity level is just too different for it to work.
I'm calling it a win because I put up with his constant attention longer than I thought I could - especially since I feel no emotional or physical attraction to him. I controlled my tendancy to throw away guys who give me way too much attention. Yeah it might suck for him thinking he was going to eventually get with me or whatever he thought, but maybe he will learn that if he wants to date women who aren't drunk party chics, he can't be a drunk party boy.
In other news, I got a massage today. I love massages. It makes me feel so great and seems to open up my nerve pathways to allow my digestive system to work better. That is, until I get in my car to drive home and have yet another car try to slam into me. Stupid young chic talking on a cell phone not paying an ounce of attention pulls out in front of me, crosses 3 lanes without so much as a glance, overshoots her lane, and nearly broadsides me. I hit my horn and she looks at me like I'm just doing it to annoy her. Then I had to sit next to her at the light - I wanted to get out, pull open her door, and throw her cell onto the interstate.
Tuesday, February 15, 2011
People who haven't been around me long, or don't really know me don't always believe me, but this is the truth: I never get a break from stress; before I can even get 1 issue corrected or problem fixed, I have 1-3 more sprout up. Right now I've got my health issues, my car is going to die any time in the next few weeks/months and I can't really afford to replace it, I've got issues with neighbors and my homeowners association, this fall I will be forced by the city to do construction work on my house due to sump pump issues that are against code (the house was built this way), and now I'm worried that my roof is about to collapse. A few areas on the walls are buckling and the half wall upstairs (separates the kitchen from the living room) is tearing away from the ceiling. I can't afford to fix it.
My life has always been this way. There is always some huge source of stress piling onto all the others. I am so envious of people who are bored with their life because there is nothing happening outside the normal work-home-work-home etc. I don't understand how that works, as if I have 1 day where I'm not stressed out by some problem, then someone on the road tries to slam into me or push me off the interstate (I'm not even joking - apparently my car is invisible to 50% of the population).
Lately I've been trying something new - asking God, the universe, whatever and whoever is willing to help me (without hurting anyone else of course) to help me find a way to correct some of these problems, or to find some way to give me a significant influx of money that will allow me to believe I can get through all these continuous issues. When I put this request out there, I hear this little voice saying "do you really want it to be that easy?" I don't think God would say something like that. I don't think I would question myself like that, because I know how tough things are and it has been figuratively and literally beating me down for so long. So my response is "hell yes!" even though I know winning PCH or the lottery wouldn't actually be easy, as you have to manage the money and deal with thousands of requests for donations. Though I know if I won a significant amount I would be giving some to charity. At the same time, I know the chances of me winning is ridiculously slim, still it would be such a huge weight off my entire life.
In the meantime, I'm not sure how much longer my finances can stay in the black. I've worked hard to do what it takes to have a huge credit score, and the last thing I want to do is start defaulting on bills because of all these issues and problems draining what little money I have left.
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