Thursday, October 28, 2010
John was in the fertilized egg business.
He had several hundred young layers (hens), called 'pullets,' and ten roosters to fertilize the eggs.
He kept records, and any rooster not performing went into the soup pot and was replaced.
This took a lot of time, so he bought some tiny bells and attached them to his roosters.
Each bell had a different tone, so he could tell from a distance, which rooster was performing.
Now, he could sit on the porch and fill out an efficiency report by just listening to the bells.
John's favorite rooster, old Butch, was a very fine specimen, but this morning he noticed old Butch's bell hadn't rung at all!
When he went to investigate, he saw the other roosters were busy chasing pullets, bells-a-ringing, but the pullets, hearing the roosters coming, would run for cover.
To John's amazement, old Butch had his bell in his beak, so it couldn't ring.
He'd sneak up on a pullet, do his job and walk on to the next one.
John was so proud of old Butch, he entered him in the Saint LawrenceCounty Fair and he became an overnight sensation among the judges.
The result was the judges not only awarded old Butch the "No Bell Piece Prize," but they also awarded him the "Pulletsurprise" as well.
Clearly old Butch was a politician in the making.
Who else but a politician could figure out how to win two of the most coveted awards on our planet by being the best at sneaking up on the unsuspecting populace and screwing them when they weren't paying attention.
Vote carefully this fall, the bells are not always audible
Wednesday, October 27, 2010
Get Out the Vote!
Asst Natl Dir Mellie Check out the discussion 'Breaking: Suspect Voting Machines in Nevada Are Serviced By SEIU'
Have YOU volunteered to become a Poll Watcher?
Discussion posted by Asst Natl Dir Mellie:
Posted by Jim Hoft on Tuesday, October 26, 2010, 5:46 PM The suspect voting machines in Clark County Nevada are serviced by the SEIU....
Breaking: Suspect Voting Machines in Nevada Are Serviced By SEIU
Tuesday, October 26, 2010
Okay. Today was THE DAY.
I was NOT going to sit in front of my computer for the first three hours of the day, then try to motivate myself to work out.
Actually, DH saved the day for me.
There I was, sitting at the computer (AKA "Flicka"), and in DH strolls with the purpose of doing ten minutes on the rower and 10 on the bike. I told him that was my plan, too.
So I continue on Flicka while he does 10 minutes on the rower, trying to ignore that I really should have gotten on the bike while he was rowing.
He finished his 10 minutes, and went straight to the bike.
Okay, okay. I step away from Flicka and get on the rower.
Once there, and beginning to row, I remember that I really LIKE this workout. I do my ten minutes, but change my mind about the bike.
Instead I pop in the DVD of Nicole's Cardio Blast. And away we go, marching and burning up those calories.
I can tell it is working, because I am really glistening. I check my attitude out, and it is very high.
I am having FUN!!
PLUS I am putting my body into fat burning mode! Win-Win all the way around!
Not to mention, I basically keep up with Nicole, all except for those side leg lifts and pulling my arms down at the same time.
Those moves just don't work for me. I can't do the arms, lifting the leg off to the side, and stay erect. I tip over.
But I keep getting up and trying to figure out how in the hell she is doing these! It remains a mystery to me, so I just do the forward ones while she is doing the impossible.
I finish up, all glistened, and decide on some Yoga. A good way to finish off a nice vigorous workout.
I turn on my Yoga music and begin putting my body into pretzel shapes and holding them for one minute. Then I change into another shape, again for one minute.
I keep this up for 10 minutes, and my body feels nicely stretched out.
I wonder......Does this make me a "CHANGELING"???
Monday, October 25, 2010
A lawyer died and arrived at the Pearly Gates.
Saint Peter asked him, "What have you done to merit entrance into
The lawyer thought a moment, then said, "A week ago, I gave a quarter
to a homeless person on the street."
Saint Peter asked Gabriel to check this out in the records, and after
a moment Gabriel affirmed that it was true.
Saint Peter said, "Well , that's fine, but it's not really quite
enough to get you into Heaven."
The Lawyer said, "Wait, wait! There's more! Three years ago, I also
gave a homeless person a quarter."
Saint Peter nodded to Gabriel, who, after a moment, nodded back to
affirm that it was true.
Saint Peter then whispered to Gabriel, "Well, what do you suggest we
do with this fellow?"
Gabriel gave the lawyer a sidelong glance, then said to Saint Peter,
"Let's give him back his 50 cents and tell him to go to Hell."
Sunday, October 24, 2010
Regarding the mine rescue, did you know:
The guy that designed the rescue module was a NASA Engineer?
The Drill was made by Schramm Inc. from Pennsylvania.
The Drill Bits were made by Center Rock, Inc. located in Berlin, Pennsylvania.
The lead driller Jeff Hart and his team are from Denver, Colorado. They are on loan from the US Military in Afghanistan where they are drilling water wells for our Forward Operating Bases. He spent the next 33 days on his feet, operating the drill that finally provided a way out Saturday for 33 trapped miners. "You have to feel through your feet what the drill is doing; it's a vibration you get so that you know what's happening," explained Hart.
Hart was called in from Afghanistan, "simply because he's the best" at drilling larger holes with the T130's wide-diameter drill bits, Stefanic said.
Standing before the levers, pressure meters and gauges on the T130's control panel, Hart and the rest of the team faced many challenges in drilling the shaft. At one point, the drill struck a metal support beam in the poorly mapped mine, shattering its hammers. Fresh equipment had to be flown in from the United States and progress was delayed for days as powerful magnets were lowered to pull out the pieces.
The mine's veins of gold and copper ran through quartzite with a high level of abrasive silica, rock so tough that it took all their expertise to keep the drill's hammers from curving off in unwanted directions. "It was horrible," said Center Rock President Brandon Fisher, exhausted after hardly sleeping during the effort.
Fisher, Stefanic and Hart called it the most difficult hole they had ever drilled, because of the lives at stake.
"If you're drilling for oil and you lose the hole, it's different.. This time there's people down below," Stefanic said. "We ruined some bits, worked through the problems as a team, and broke through," Hart said. "I'm very happy now."
Miners' relatives crowded around Hart on Saturday, hugging and posing for pictures with him as he walked down from the rescue operation into the tent camp where families had anxiously followed his work.
"He's become the hero of the day," said Dayana Olivares, whose friend Carlos Bugueno is one of the miners stuck below.
In a different day and age, Jeff Hart would be the most famous American in our country right now. He would be honored at the White House. Schoolchildren would learn of his skill and heroism. I hope to help.
Let's pass this along. We need everyday heroes!
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