Ok I wrote the blog last week so the update is I started today with tracking all my food not a good eating day way below in everything.
Not feeling good went to yoga and felt sick and dizzy probably because I had a headache this morning.
I am out of town tomorrow for a doctors appt. but I will track my food again. I know how well I do when I track everything it really keeps me focused. I have to do this for me. I am going to miss my walk and drop unless I come right home from the doctor which I might. I will decide later if I am going to visit friends or not while I am in Toronto area.
I know I am ready to do this over the summer and get in a routine so when I go back to work babysitting I will be able to say NO to all the treats the Polish lady offers me all the time. I won't be so inclined to say this won't hurt now that I know exactly how much weight I have gained and I have actually seen myself in a full length mirror OMG that will really open your eyes won't it.
I have never thought of myself as fat even though I knew I had to lose weight and lots of it. Seeing myself in the mirror showed me just how big I actually was and I was not impressed. So summer is here lots and hopefully lots of fresh area fruits and veggies. Apparently as much as 80-100% of a lot of our fruit trees are destroyed because of the weather. I will just have to wait and see what they have but I am sure the prices will be high.
I am going to keep a running update monthly on my progress. I saw that on a sparkpage and I think that will also help to keep me on track a visual chart.
I believe every time I do a blog I am starting over and ready to really take charge of my weight loss.
Well I am at my heaviest weight ever hear that EVER!!!!!!
I have never seen a heavy person when I look in the mirror I finally do maybe that is a good thing I can't fool myself anymore.
I saw a dietitician yesterday who asked what do you want me to do for you? I said just let me weigh in weekly and keep me accountable and challenged to take the weight off. She didn't give me an eating plan she gave me Canada's Food Guide not sure if the American one is the same. I will go back to my way of eating when I was losing weight and doing sparkpeople daily. I am up in allowed calories so I had a hard time reaching the calorie range when it was lower so it is a good thing I will lose faster. No I won't starve myself I will make healthy choices and do my fat, protein and carbs at every meal and snack. It is going to take planning which I am going to take the time to do.
I will start tracking on the tracker on Monday. No I am not going to cheat until then I am out of town the next two days I will make good healthy choices. I am getting a CT scan on Friday and picking up my grandchildren. Saturday is a birthday party for the 4 year old I will make good healthy choices. Sunday not sure if I will be home or out of town. So that is why I will start tracking on Monday I will get back to my spark routine. I am going to sit down and make a time schedule and stick to it at least during the week.
I haven't realized just how much the stress of the last year has really made me gain weight.
I have been going to yoga on Monday and osteofit on Tues. for the month of June then they stop for the summer. In the fall I will join both again and keep going all year. Tues. I am doing a Walk and Drop we walk for about 25 minutes and then 5 min. cool down. I will get to aquafit at least 3-5 times a week again. I am going to make weight loss my #1 priority now which it should have been for a very long time.
I am going to cut back on the fruit I bring into the house and buy more veggies. I love veggies so not a big deal. I love fruit I just ate a quart of strawberries fresh Ontario strawberries. YUM YUM YUM a good choice per se but I have to cut back on fruit. I had 2 bananas this morning. I have to start eating breakfast again and get into my healthy eating routine.
My 17 grandson has started a healthy eating plan for himself he got it from another boy on his football team. It is a lot of protein not as many carbs but I am not going to say anything it is pretty healthy stuff. I won't have anything in the house to sabotage him or myself. My younger grandchildren their mother doesn't like them having much in the way of sweets or junk so it is up to me to stick to my guns. I know I can do this how many times have I lost the weight already too many but this time I am going to make it work.
So I am going to be on here regularly and checking in with my sparkfriends and together we will succeed in our weight loss journey.
I know I have said this many times but I think I am definitely going to do it this time.
Have a great night. Teri
It has been a real struggle to get back on track after my dad's death in July.
What a jolt that was and everything else that followed. Every day was more drama and things that needed my attention so like all woman I got neglected.
It is a shame we don't take as good care of ourselves as we do others.
With my last blog I told most of the adventure that set me back since July but there were many more. I wanted to put in a new floor in my living room and bedroom. So finally got the laminate beautiful looks so much like real wood. Had someone come to install it for a deal a friend. He calls me on my weekend away to say he could lay it but it would come up in a year. Under the carpet was particle board and anything else you could name and the joists were mouldy and wet so had to take out my whole floor and under that was rocks Yep rocks so had to decide what we were going to do so a basically easy not to expensive job got costly and time consuming. I lived with no floor just rocks for a couple of weeks. Then things just kept happening. So 2011 will go down as one of my worst years ever.
The lawsuit by my brother everyone I talk to has one horror story or another about an estate and at least one family member is alienated from the family afterwards. Sad but true a friend of mine said if you love your kids don't leave them any money to fight over isn't that sad. Hopefully when I get the tax return back from Canada Revenue hopefully that issue will be settled.
The two falls I had have been settled one payment I have received the other is in the mail so that is done.
I am going this weekend hopefully to make my funeral arrangements so that is done and over with much better than life insurance. The family doesn't have to take care of anything just a couple of phone calls.
I have been getting to the pool pretty regularly at least 3 times a week still having a hard time tracking my food daily and that is the one thing that really helps me to keep on track. I really have to challenge myself to do that daily.
I have been getting on spark every day for a few minutes. Now I have to make myself track my food. Unless I track daily I really don't keep track of what I'm eating even when I think I am eating good I may not be.
Time to take the bull by the horns and really FOCUS on what I want to do.
Every day is a struggle but it will get easier with time. Teri
I guess it has been awhile. I have been under so much stress and chaos since then. I have found out I am a really strong person but when under stress I come last.
I was so looking forward to outdoor aquafit starting early July and I was only babysitting occasionally over the summer so was ready for a good outdoor exercise filled summer.
The first incident my retaining wall fell and of course it is city property behind me and I found out I owned the retaining wall 70feet wide 7 feet high roughly $30,000 to replace. So looking into other alternatives still dealing with the legal dept for the city.
July 12th my father died suddenly and what a shock I saw him on the Sunday and got the call from my sister on the Tuesday. He was fine on Sunday so just another reminder you just never know so I was happy I kissed him and said my goodbye on Sunday. It was an unplanned spur of the moment visit also so someone was telling me something. I was executor and my father although neat and organized he was a hoarder so my summer was spent in his apartment going through everything from the day he was born. He brought all the stuff from his mothers when she died. A very time consuming job.
I went to Cape Cod for a long weekend with a sparkfriend in early August so had lots to finish when I got back dad's place had to be empty by the end of August.
I fell going into a Montana's in July and was all bruised and sore. I already have arthritis in all my joints and two knee replacements and fibro I really don't need added injuries.
I went back to my full time babysitting in Sept. along with another little boy occasionally. I only do before and after school and have it scheduled to go to aquafit 3-5 times a week. I still had all the legal stuff for the estate and it is over an hour away so back and forth. I was so impressed I had everything ready to be signed and disburse the estate funds. Get a letter from my brother who had nothing to do with my father ever was fighting the way I handled the estate and got a lawyer involved. Lucky my daughter works in the legal field and saved us thousands of dollars. My brother has alienated everyone over the joint account my father left me and my sister. My other sister was fine with my dad's last wishes. I finally got a letter from his stating his lawyer and him still think they would have won if it went to court but there wouldn't be any money left to win. I don't believe him but I don't really care he has apparently dropped the case. I am finishing up taxes etc. and then going to divide it up after I get his signature hopefully.
My youngest DD is in a house that she hasn't officially bought yet waiting to be severed so she is stressed with the not knowing when how what etc. it has finally been severed so hoping to get that over and done with shortly. Now our government says she doesn't have her adopted son anymore and they are deducting money every month we are trying to find out where he is if he isn't with us. My oldest DD just got over a support dispute that went to court her ex owed her over $30,000 in back child support and was trying to say the child lived with him to get out of paying. Be careful out there it is very hard to prove a child lives with you full time. Now we are dealing with the issue again. OMG.
Her's got settled in the courts but not without challenges. The child is 17 and the father tells him all sorts of stuff including quit school after this year so I don't have to pay your mother child support.
I have settled with two insurance co. for two falls last year one in January and one in July. I will get $3450 I still have shoulder pain but who knows which ailment is causing which pain so that is good for not having to show medical reports etc.
My Oldest DD fell last week on ice on our sidewalk and broke her arm and injured her rotator cuff yep so she is now in a lot of pain. Hopefully the rotator cuff heals it is not a good injury to get. The good news is the fracture will heal itself and she won't need surgery.
My granddaughter had to have oral surgery last week her adult teeth have not come in and catscan showed she had extra teeth that needed to be extracted and hopefully the permanent teeth will fall on there own. She had 3 extra teeth in her gums. She is fine but had to put her cat down 2 nights ago they just spent over $500 two weeks ago and the vet wasn't sure the outcome some cats recover and some don't it was the middle of the night when they took the cat in. My gdaughter walked around saying I have to stay calm and collected she is a very old soul and was making tea for her mother. She is 9 and a wonderful girl.
I am off to the doctor today for various small issues and then to aquafit this afternoon.
This is really long but will end with I am still strong and things are slowly getting solved and settled. I only wish that I could take some extra time for me. Today my DD's dog is at the vet getting neutered, chipped and teeth extracted I will go by to pay the bill and see how he is doing on my way to the pool. My DD lives upstairs so I do a lot of the running around while she is at work.
I will get the estate settled by the end of April I hope. We were supposed to hear from the city 3 weeks ago so no news is good news.
I have left out a lot of other household issues that happened this summer but that will have to wait until the novel comes out.
I love my sparkfriends I really wish I had more time to spend with them.
TAKE CARE STAY POSITIVE AND SMILE.
The time has gone fast since my 8 week battle team ended for awhile. I was hoping it would start up again soon. I did really well in those 8 weeks lost 11 lbs.
I have gained some back but it has been a very hectic time for me. That is no excuse because I should come first and eating healthy and making better choices should be priority.
I just became a co-leader in a new group and it should keep me grounded and on track now. I have tracked for 2 days. Yesterday everything but my evening food. Today I tracked everything.
Last night I tried my new Wii game Country Dancing it is so much fun. I did 2 songs last night and have done 2 songs so far tonight. I may do one more song if I get everything done and get ready to rest.
I am really going to work on no nighttime snacking or just something to stay within my calorie limits. I usually don't have an issue once I get started for awhile until I get off track for awhile.
I have stayed away from sugar for 2 days now. Natural sugars only no added sugar. No one can stay away all together. I don't do sweeteners use honey as much as possible.
My shoulders are really starting to bother me and I have a pain in my elbow area probably tennis elbow. I have a massage tomorrow and maybe she can do something about it.
I better go take some medication getting really achy and time to call it a night. Teri