*AMBER512   202,684
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Anti-social

Thursday, July 31, 2008

Yup, I've been anti-social lately. I don't particularly know why. I've just been super busy. However, when I mention that and people ask what I've been up to, I can never really think of anything to say.

I've always been really comfortable just hanging out with myself. I don't really need a social scene. I never did have a group that I belonged to in high school. I was friends (aquaintances maybe?) with lots of people. But I was never in an actual group. I was friends with people on dance team, but I wasn't on it. I was friends with people in choir and band, but I wasn't in those either. I was on the newspaper staff, and I did talk to people there. But I didn't have a reason to go to the late nights, so I never did. I was friends with random people, but most of them weren't friends with one another. So I guess I'm just not used to hanging out with a group of people. I seem to be more of a one-on-one type person.

So my days tend to fill up with errands, chores, the gym, church activities, sparkpeople, myspace, youtube, and attempting to keep in touch with family and friends. But I've been really bad about that last one! There's a lot of everyone else, and very little of me. I'm also attempting to read Barbara Walters' memoir Audition. If I think about it, it's not even that long of a book, I don't think it quite gets to 600 pages. But I'm also reading four other books (as is usual of me). But since I got the book from the library I always feel like there is a ton of pressure to read it quickly. Especially since I sit on the waiting list for most of the books I check out. There are always a billion people in line ahead of me, and a billion people behind me. So I tend to try and read them as quickly as possible. So if I'm not online, at the gym, or at church, I'm probably reading.

I guess it's because social events tend to drain me of all my energy. Small talk is particularly EXCRUCIATING. I usually have to have some sort of preparation before I put myself through that. But since summer hit, it's been one thing after another. In fact this last weekend was the first (and last!) time all summer that we had absolutely nothing to do. Then, of course, both Aubrey and I ended up getting sick. It was nice actually because we spent practically three whole days laying in bed and watching movies together. Talk about a zero pressure situation. Just getting to spend some quality time with my husband, even if he was in pain and I felt lightheaded and dizzy the whole time. We watched movies I haven't even thought about in years!

I guess this blog is an attempt to apologize to anyone who has wanted to talk, but I haven't had the time. To anyone who doesn't hear from me often enough, to anyone who wonders why I'm even friends with them here if I'm never going to be good at staying in touch with them. I love you all! But shhh, just let me finish this chapter.
emoticon

  
  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

BLAZINGSWORD 8/21/2008 5:36PM

    You look fantastic Amber! Way to go girl! My hat is off to you!

And Jibbie49 is so right about Dr. Phil's Dad's saying. LOL!

"Don't worry about what peopel are thinking about you because you'd be surprised how seldom they do." Dr. Phil per His Dad.

What insight and wisdom!

Do you often think about other people? Probably not, so there you have it.

Anyway, you have done a most excellent job in your weight loss! And you have such pretty eyes too! emoticon

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SIZE-0-4EVER 8/4/2008 9:43AM

  Small talk is difficult for me too

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JIBBIE49 8/1/2008 8:26AM

    I had to laugh, because Dr. Phil's saying came to mind when you were worried about what people were thinking since you hadn't kept up with them......."Don't worry about what people are thinking about you, because you'd be surprised how seldom they do." Dr. Phil per His Dad. emoticon emoticon

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READY4LIVE 7/31/2008 1:16PM

    Hi hun,

You know there is extroverts (who get energy being around other people etc) and then there is introvert (who need time/space to recharge their energies). That is the Myers Briggs definition, and introvert doesn't meant that your not social etc, it's how you get your energies.

There is nothing wrong with wanting time for yourself, it's actually healthy :) Most people whether extroverts or introverts love to have some free time, to just lounge around or have nothing plan, and free to do anything you want on a whim.

And if someone asks what you've been up to, errands, chores, the gym, church activities, being a Leader & inspiration on Sparkpeople, and keeping in touch with family & friend IS a full plate. So it's understandable, your not able to keep up with everyone all the time :)

~Heather

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MOM2ACAT 7/31/2008 1:13PM

    I am pretty much the same way. I am perfectly happy with the time I spend alone. Which is probably a good thing, as with my work schedule, I work on weekends, my days off are during the week, so it makes it kind of hard to socialize, except for online.
I am more of a one-on-one person too. The bigger the group I'm in, the quieter and shyer I tend to be.

And as much as I love the occasional get together with family or a group of friends, I'm always glad when the party is over and I can go back to my peaceful, quiet home.

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QUEMBEL1 7/31/2008 8:43AM

    I am anti-social except on-line. It seems easier to be myself when people can't see me. lol

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BKP4166 7/31/2008 2:59AM

    Amber....I can relate to your story. I was in the choir, Pep Club, Triple Trio...went to Football and Basketball games...but was never one of the "group". Moist of my other activities were with my church youth group, choir and teaching Sunday School.
Chit Chat is not something I'm really good at and social activities today take a lot out of me. I enjoy helping other people, but am never sure how much help I really am to people...but I'll keep trying....and go ahead and finish that chapter. emoticon
Kathy

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Setting a good example

Monday, July 21, 2008

I often wonder if I am setting a good example for the children in my life. Unfortunately I don't have any of my own yet. But I do have a four-year-old niece and a two-year-old nephew.

I never discuss my weight loss, food, or exercise with either of them. Or rather, I guess I should say I don't discuss it in FRONT of them. They are both still very young, but my niece is very smart. She picks up on things. And I've read stories about girls as young as six saying they are on "diets."

She's still at the age where running around like crazy is fun, not exercise. Plus she absolutely adores fruits. So I definitely try and encourage those things. Recently though, I thought I might have failed her.

She was over at my house and she likes to look at the pictures I have on my computer. She loves pointing out the people she knows and making new observations of each one. She asked for me to click on one particular picture, so I opened it without thinking about it. It is the middle picture on my sparkpage with my face at 245+ pounds and my face at 165- pounds. She said "Look it's you Auntie Amber! But who's that?" referring to me in the 245+ pic. I explained that was me. To which she replied, "Oh, that's you with your big face and you with your little face! You have big ears!"

I sort of chuckled and quickly moved on to other pictures. She's seen my wedding pictures recently where I am at my heaviest weight, and she knew who I was! I guess she had just never seen two pictures of me right next to one another before.

During that same day I found her standing on my scale. She turned to me and asked "What does this mean? Oh! I know! It means I'm a big girl!" She said this with a giant smile on her face because at four being a "big girl" is a fantastic thing! I smiled and said "yes, you're my big girl!"

I think I'm worrying prematurely, I just don't want to have her go through the things I did as a kid. Technically, we're not really related as she is my best friend's kid. My best friend was super skinny as a child. But I still worry that I'm going to cause her to think about her weight too much. I don't want her to think that she has to be thin to be well liked, while still expressing the benefits of eating healthy foods and playing!

  
  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

MAMABEAN37 7/27/2008 11:34AM

    I think it's great that you are aware of this. My daughter is 2 and I really want to get this weight off before she becomes cognizant of it. My son is 5, has seen me struggle and bounce around for the past 4 years and he is worried about weight. My husband is a big guy, too, and my son is noticing that we are a little different from other parents. The godd news- it's motivated my husband. The bad news, it's a process and hopefully we can get going before he becomes embarassed or obsessed.

And by the way- AWESOME job. You are truly inspirational and I love your niece's comment about your big face!!!

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JIBBIE49 7/21/2008 8:39PM

    Always talk to her about being slim for the reason of GOOD HEALTH and make that your main concern. If her mother was thin, that helps a lot, and you will be, too, so don't worry!! emoticon

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Fat Politics

Tuesday, July 08, 2008

So I just finished reading Fat politics : the real story behind America's obesity epidemic by J. Eric Oliver.

WOW! It is really interesting. I was glad to read about some history of what we have thought about "overweight" and "obesity." Also to learn how the BMI started and why. (Hint, it has nothing to do with weight loss!)

If you can find it at your local library, definitely give it a read.

I think I am getting more and more ok with myself. I am glad for the things my body can do, and am less worried about what it actually looks like. I am working on getting stronger. I want to kick anyone's butt who wants to continue to make fun of me because of my weight! Hi-yah! emoticon

  
  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

TOKENFATGUY 7/20/2008 5:26PM

    hmmm...I'll have to give that a read. Thanks

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HONKEIE 7/19/2008 2:38AM

    I read the book 'Fat Land' and it really opened my eyes to how and why food was made so unhealthy back in the day. In a way high fructose corn syrup saved the economy but in the long run did more damage than good.
The polotics behind fat is a scary thing and even now companies are making money hand over fist in marketing to bigger people. There is more money to be made keeping people heavy than getting them healty.

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DNJEN471 7/10/2008 2:26AM

    Thats right girl! Kick butt!

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JIBBIE49 7/9/2008 9:49PM

    I went to Barnes and Nobles today and looked at about 10 Diet books, and I was amazed at the HUGE number of books there were. emoticon
I wonder if the fashion business has been behind the obesity problem, because they have REALLY pushed to sell clothes to fat women and they made teen clothes up to size 17 now. I've read that what use to be a size 10 dress is a size 6 and what was a size 14 is now a size 10, so women don't have to face how much weight they have gained and still be a size 10.

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AURORA.BELLA 7/9/2008 7:08AM

    You look absolutely amazing! I hope you know (I think you do) that you are such an inspiration on here, and you have come so far that you have to know by now that everyone is telling the truth!

That being said I know from experience that what really matters is the way you feel about yourself regardless of compliments and how fantastic everyone says you look. I am confident that you will get there, but changing your mindset about your body takes about as much work, if not more, as changing your body in the first place.

I will have to look into that book it sounds interesting.

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BUTTEGAL 7/8/2008 11:28PM

    Sounds really interesting--will check it out!

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READY4LIVE 7/8/2008 3:11PM

    Thanks for sharing, I'll have to check it out! emoticon

LOL... that's right girl, kick their butt, cause you look good and there is nothing to make fun of! emoticon





Comment edited on: 7/8/2008 3:09:58 PM

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Jared, the Subway Guy

Sunday, July 06, 2008

So I decided to read the book by Jared Fogle, the guy who lost weight eating only at Subway.

He gives some practical advise, nothing too terribly mind-blowing. Although I did realize that I wasn't too keen on some of his tactics.

I mean, he was able to lose 245 pounds in 11 months. 245 was my starting weight. He lost the fat me in less than a year! Whiel that may sound cool, I can't imagine losing that much weight in that short of time. Especially doing it by basically not providing your body with the proper amount of nourishment.

He basically went from eating over 10,000 calories a day to eating less than 2,000. No wonder he lost the first 94 pounds in two months. I would have gone down a LOT slower than that. I also didn't like how he implied that plateaus don't exist. I have been on a few plateaus and am currently in a plateau. Sorry Jared, they do exist!

He also skipped breakfast. Not something I am willing to do. The only meat he ate was the turkey meat on his 6-inch sub at lunch. He ate a 12-inch Veggie Sub for dinner. At both meals he ate baked chips or pretzels and washed everything down with diet pop. Any time he was hungry for a snack, he drank more diet pop. He ate no dairy and no fruits. No fruits? Ok, that diet isn't for me! =)

I also don't understand his no snacking policy. I kept thinking, don't you know how much healthy food you could eat? But he enjoyed hearing his stomach groan and rumble wanting food. He didn't give in and would wait it out until his next meal. So he basically went from eating crap 24/7 to eating two meals a day. A sandwich and some chips at noon. A sandwich and some pretzels at seven. No other food...ever.

I really do hope he's eating a more well balanced diet now. It's good that you can lose weight and have kept it off for six years, Jared! But denying your body of the nutrition it needs isn't any better than stuffing it full of crap.

I did really enjoy the book because I never knew his whole story. It's touching and just for that, I would certainly recommend people read it.

  
  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

TAKINGMEBACK 7/16/2008 11:43AM

    very interesting. Makes me glad to have a balanced approach. Just goes to show how far we can be willing to go to get rid of the weight...but what I'm excited about is living an overall healthier life. Sounds like that's what you are doing and you are an inspiration to many.
Thanks Amber.
Lisa

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MARGOMCP 7/9/2008 5:44PM

    Thanks for telling us about the book, very interesting. I think there's a wide variety of what people can eat and how much; I don't think we'd agree with an African bushman's meals either, too many bugs, LOL. But it is fun to read about and imagine and see if there's anything one can learn or want to try for one's self. I like he had a veggie sub at least. Most guys wouldn't I don't think.

Does make you wonder if he isn't sick of Subway and its subs by now. Don't know that I'd like to become an (un)official spokesman for an organization that way and be tied the rest of my life to it. I wouldn't do Subway because I find their subs "tasteless" no matter what I do with them. I don't do any fast food/"quick" meals like that anymore at all; when I go out to eat it's a real restaurant where I can get my fresh broiled fish fix :-)

Comment edited on: 7/9/2008 5:42:37 PM

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*AMBER512 7/9/2008 2:22PM

    That's ok! I know that he didn't have cheese on his sandwiches. He saw it as just extra calories he didn't need. And he said baked chips, but I'm not sure if it was the original flavor or if they had other ones. I know an ounce of my baked chips is 120, but I thought the bags there had like 1 and 3/4 ounces in them or something like that. I'm not sure.

And apparently he used to eat numerous fast food meals and I don't mean throughout the day, but in one sitting. He tells a story about when he was home alone as a kid and ordered a pizza, extra meat, extra cheese, and ate the entire thing himself. So I'm not surprised he could eat that much, especially since he was drinking pop by the truckfull! lol

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AURORA.BELLA 7/9/2008 7:02AM

    sorry to double post -

Baked chips, 1 small bag is really only about 120 calories. Either he was eating the regular chips, or he really was pretty far under 2000 cal. I'm just curious to know: Did he have cheese on sandwiches and what did he drink with the meals?

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AURORA.BELLA 7/9/2008 6:59AM

    I'm glad that this worked for him, and that he has been able to keep the weight off, but I personally am tired of this guy. The subway "diet" at least my assumption of it that he did just isn't realistic, as far as time goes and the price of their sandwiches. Now he almost definitely eats for free, of course. I had no idea that he lost all that weight in just 11 months, wow.

I can honestly believe that he probably was eating 2000 calories or less to do that, but what I don't understand is how he could possibly be eating 10,000 calories a day before the subway "diet" thing. That sounds insane, but I guess he probably wasn't eating the best foods to begin with so I guess it's plausible.

I don't really like that he wrote a book outlining what he did (two meals a day with no other food, no breakfast?!) and that the company unwittingly condone it. That sounds like giving people advice to starve themselves and they'll be successful as long as they stick with it. Also, I've never seen pretzels at a subway, I wish they had pretzels at the ones I go to!

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*AMBER512 7/8/2008 2:07PM

    Well the total calories of his sandwiches was 750, but he also had a bag of baked chips or pretzels with each sandwich, so that probably added about 350 calories or so. I don't remember how much is in each bag. So he was definitely eating less than 2000! WAY less. When he said he ate less than 2000, I didn't even realize how much less he meant!


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NIKKIV2 7/8/2008 10:05AM

    If Jared only ate those two meals a day, how did he get his 2000 calories in? I didn't think the sandwiches he ate packed that many calories into them.

I agree it could not have been healthy to drop down so drastically. I commend him in keeping the weight off, but have to agree that I would definitely go about it a different way.

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*AMBER512 7/6/2008 5:27PM

    See that's where I disagree. The amount of protein in his turkey sub (6 inch) is only 18 grams. The amount in the veggie one (12 inch) he ate for dinner is also 18. That's only 36 for the day. That is not enough! Plus he certainly wasn't getting all of the vitamins and minerals he needs considering he had completely cut out two food groups.

Slow and steady wins the race. Without complete doctor supervision (which I'm glad he recommends even though he didn't do it himself) losing that much weight that quickly can really mess up your health.


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JIBBIE49 7/6/2008 4:29PM

    Jared has been here at the SUBWAY stores in Pensacola and came to the Junior College for FITNESS DAY in April, although I didn't get to meet him. But one of the store owners told me that he was 6'2" and well over 400# when he started. FOR A MAN losing that much weight isn't really bad. Richard Simmons lost 138# in two months when he began his weight loss. They have a LOT of swelling (water weight) when that obese. Dr. Atkins would say that such an obese person has ALL THE FAT they need to live off of, so 2,000 calories a day would provide Jared with the nutrition (vitamins, etc) that he needed. No one needs more that 80 grams of protein per day which is 320 calories, so he did fine with the turkey meat.
What I love about JARED is he NEVER started out trying to be anyone famous (unlike Kathy Lee Gifford, Maria Shriver, etc.) He just did it to he HEALTHY. emoticon

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Hiking on the fourth

Saturday, July 05, 2008

So, you can be a gym rat. Go pretty much every day, most days of the week. But that does not prepare you for actual hiking. Trust me. Both sides of my butt are whining with soreness every time I walk.

I had no idea that so many people would want to go see a waterfall on the 4th! I also had no idea that so many people really couldn't care less about others! They'd just be walking and then decide to stop right in front of you, then almost seem mad when you go around them. Oh, were you wanting me to just stop right here too? Wait for you to be done? Or the amount of people who don't understand the concept of a single file line. No, that's ok, really, I wanted to be that friendly with the rock so your entire group could walk side by side.

Also, what's with parents and doublewide strollers? I was already a little irritated by how many people are pushing their kids up with strollers, (walking very slowly, big bulky strollers) and then we saw at least 3 doublewide strollers. The trails are BARELY wide enough for one person going up to walk past one person going down. There are no guardrails to keep me from falling to my death just because you don't want to have to carry your kids.

That being said, Aubrey and I only took a couple of breaks on the way up. I made it up once...about 90 pounds ago. But I had to stop at every single switchback because I was so tired. It must have taken us an hour and a half that time. This time it took about 40 minutes, and that was mostly because of trying to get around the slow people in front of us. Although I learned that going downhill does not keep my heart rate up. I've already been noticing that my heart rate plummets pretty much the minute I stop doing something, no matter how high it was. I took my heart rate monitor with me and burned almost 250 calories going up. Only about 35 going down. My goal was 300 total, so I had to kinda "jog" and "hop" my way down trying to get my heart rate to go above 90. I think I hit 91 once going down, whereas going up I was averaging about 130.

Then we went to the park and watched the fireworks. I hope everyone else had a fun time celebrating independence day!

  
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JIBBIE49 7/5/2008 10:19PM

    I remember last season on THE BIGGEST LOSER, the first day they all had to hike up to the top of that hill and BettySue had to have her daughter PULL her up. Then at the end her dd, won the BL prize. YOU WILL WIN THAT PRIZE!! emoticon

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