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Starting fresh with a new do
This will not be me any longer. Day by day I will slowly change. Just watch me. Week 1 workout 2 of BBG.
A journey of 1000 miles begins with one step. Weight loss doesn't happen in instant. It's happens with consistent, deliberate choices. It's also not about the weight. I boxed up my scale today and buried it in the garage. I'm not going to weigh myself at all the rest of 2017. I refused to be derailed by skinny days ruined because the scale says 1 or "reward" myself when it says -1. I refuse to allow myself to be tortured by it anymore.
The easiest mantra to say to yourself to develop a growth mindset. Progress is never direct, there's steps back and life that gets in the way. What's important is that the overall direction is going the right way. I purposely decided to start this change the week I have custody of my son with a work party on the weekend and a vacation only 2 weeks away. If I could fit all the workouts in and maintain my calorie goals during this time, then I'm out of excuses.
This is all you need. The decision to just commit. Don't worry about what plan, what workout, what to eat, how many calories, counting macros or not. NONE of that matters! All you're doing is stressing yourself out. Let's be honest, if you're carrying extra weight, you weren't watching your portions or choosing healthier options, you weren't putting in work everyday to move your body. That's all it takes to get results! Eat less and move more. Doesn't matter what. Doesn't matter how. Now go!
Isn't that the truth. Some days are better than others. They all won't be easy. It's these moments that you grow! You dig deep and connect with your true self to follow your plan to make your dream reality. One thing I've been saying that helps when I want to eat ALL the things is that I can have that tomorrow, just pick one for now. The perfect way to combat impulse eating, sleep on it. Decide in the morning.
One day at time. Getting the hang of the BBG workouts. The 2nd half flies by. Even though my legs are on fire and heart is pounding so hard, realizing that it's the last time I have to do that exercise pumps me up! Before I know it I'm done. #bbgweek2 #bbgmoms #nogym #noexcuses
Something on my mind lately... Y'ALL! Eat normal food!! I keep seeing pictures of people posting "diet" foods, rice cakes, protein shakes substituted for lunch, dinners with a plateful of veggies only. Good for you if that's what you actually love to eat, but everyone else, EAT FOOD YOU ENJOY!! You got fat eating too much food, just eat less of it and you will lose weight. If you have 30, 50, 80, 150 pounds to lose, it's not going to come off in month. You need a plan that is sustainable!
Y'all look at that Saturday night! Wooh! Work holiday party and we ate like kings! Do I care about the calories? Not one damn bit. Did it wipe out a week of progress? Maybe but who really knows. It's a once a year party! It won't ruin a month or a year of progress. I enjoyed the night and got right back at it. Week 3 of BBG starts today! Ready to rock it before I leave for vacation on Thursday!
Right back at it today after a great weekend. My calorie goal is just a ball park. I eat when I'm hungry. My body"s daily needs are 2,350-2,600 calories, depending on which formula you use. I thought 1600 calories/day seemed doable without feeling restrictive while enough to create a deficit. So my plan is to eat less than 11,200 calories a week. If I'm hungry one day and eat 1800 calories, usually the next day I'm not as hungry and it balances out. I thought I'd try this out to see how it goes
How to have a life, go on a guilt-free vacation and still lose 1-2 lbs.. I can't wait for Phoenix!! 80/20 rule. 80% good, 20% splurge. #bbgwk3
Back from vacation. Not sure what possessed me to step on the scale this morning. It was a terrible idea! I was sad all day, feeling despair, all sorts of doom and gloom. Ate comfort food for lunch, skipped my walk over lunch. Was pretty much an emotional mess. Well I stepped on the scale just now before bed and it was 1 lb lighter than this morning! Wasted a great day feeling sorry for myself over nothing. Bye bye scale! Bring on week 4. #bbgwk4 #readyfordeathbykayla
Oh man. I am fighting for it this week. Keeping going with week 4 has been HARD! I put legs off for 3 days and arms off for 1. But I got back at it. My food has been not great this week so far. I'm slowly reeling it in. This is life. Some days are worse than others but I'm not losing sight of my goal. I will get there! One day at a time.
End of Week 4 pre-training. Start of official BBG week 1. Found out over the weekend I was only on pre-training workouts for BBG. Bring on the real thing. Food has been a struggle this week. I made my sister take my scale to her house because it's been torturing me. Now my only way to judge is real work, staying under calories and photos. I'm not giving up. 2017 is my year. Watch me shrink.
I have no idea if there's any change. To be honest, I feel huge! I did not want to take photos but it's been two weeks. The last two weeks were sooo far from perfect. I ate pizza ALL day yesterday and had starburst for breakfast. I had to dig deep today to keep on going. I was dreading legs tonight but as soon as it started, the fighter in me came out and I did it with focus. The first time I tried this exact workout 4 weeks ago, I was at complete muscle failure in 5 minutes. First sign of progr
Damn right! Push that doubt aside and shock yourself with what you can do! My manta for 2017 is "she believed she could, so she did." For some reason, I almost start crying every single time I say it. It's just so powerful to me because I truly BELIEVE I can!
Wk 1 vs Wk 6. Same weight. February has not been great. Work has been nuts plus a lot of traveling but I actually see progress. My butt has lifted a lot which probably explains why my clothes fit just as tight but I see a shape again forming in my back, not as stretched out. I am going hit March with intensity. Looking forward to the results!
Seriously. ðŸ˜• I know frustration is part of the process. I feel like I'm trying but after 2 months of effort, my entire closet is now too tight to be work acceptable. My pants were so tight this morning that I had to wear one of the two pairs of jeans remaining that fit to work. And jeans aren't allowed. My entire closet I had to buy in October because my existing one was too tight. I don't want to go through that process again but I'm feeling like the more I try, the heavier I get.
Thank you to everyone who helped me through my Monday meltdown. I appreciate it. Today I've been thinking about this question. It sounds like a pessimistic thought but really it's about building yourself up. Realizing what you have to offer and why you're worth fighting for your dreams. So why are you worth the effort?
Monday after my meltdown, I turned the week around by meal prepping lunch for the week. Took 30 minutes to make 3 meals and set me up for a good week. Pushing for those week 8 progress photos.
Latest progress pics..
Hmmm... Panera half salads. I love you! â¤ï¸ðŸ˜ƒ Trying out the Cashew Citrus Chicken one today.. it's fantastic! Cus I can't eat pizza every time I forget my lunch.
Latest round of progress photos.. my clothes are finally fitting a bit looser.
Woohoo for progress!
All stocked up for my diet. It promises you'll lose up to 10 lbs in 2 days! #thefludiet
What a wonderful perspective! Now that I'm back to healthy, it's time to get back at it! March wasn't exactly the intense month that I wish for but I believe I made a little more progress. April is gonna be good! Last month before I turn 29! My goal is to get to goal before age 30. Slow and steady builds lifelong habits.
My love broke off our relationship last night. We have been doing 2 hr long distance and he just can't deal with moving to my city. It seemed fun and exciting at first but as it got more real, he got too scared. He's never left his hometown so I understand but we were so good and I loved him with all my heart. Be thinking of me because this next part of my life is going to be very hard. He was my everything. ðŸ˜
Talking to him is off limits. Being able to just be sad with him is not allowed. My heart aches for our love and my best friend. I understand he would be unable to move without holding resentment for me which would kill us slowly but I absolutely hate not having him in my life. How is it that two people can be so perfect for each other and so in love but still not going to be able to work? How cruel this is.
Woke up with peace and love in my heart this morning. I see it all clear now with no regrets. I will be forever grateful for his presence in my life. ðŸ’•
Woohoo!! Weighed on my parents scale. I don't have one at my house. My clothes are definitely looser so I thought why not check in with where I'm at. It's something! I've only averaged 2 workouts a week and 3 out of the last 7 weeks where I tracked calories. My weight and health are my only focus for 2017. Size 4 I'm coming for you!
Latest round of progress pics! I can't believe this difference is only ~10 pounds! Wow! I can't wait to see what the next 10 will look like. Starting BBG over again at week 1 next week. I am ready!
Old Dominion "Song for another time" has been my break up song without a doubt. Trying to hold onto the love and happy memories when you know your time together has come to an end. Wishing for one more night to go out with a bang before reality sets in the next morning. It's been the little things lately that make my heart pause but I'm getting by ok.
Finally got my bad haircut fixed! A good cut definitely does wonders for feeling pretty!
Y'all! Just got back after my weekend getaway to Chicago. Tried a new workout at my friend's studio. Lagree Method Pilates. I am in love! It was so cool! Problem is there's nothing like that offered here.. Boutique fitness studios haven't hit Iowa yet. I've been looking for a new passion because I have to re-write my future now post breakup and I decided I want to get certified as a personal trainer and open a fitness studio a la Chicago style in a year or two.
People make decisions based on two drivers: fear and pleasure. I am driven by pleasure more than fear. I can put myself in the future situation and feel the joy. That motivates me to push through anything in my way, no matter how hard. So are you running away from the worst outcomes or fearlessly chasing your dreams?
Throwback to homecoming my senior year. I thought I was SO fat! I had zero confidence and thought I was unworthy of anyone's attention. No one asked me to dances. I never had a date. Always my best friends third wheel. I look back on these photos and wonder why I had such a hard time believing I was pretty, desired, and worthy. Boys were not nice to me. I was never anyone's first choice. I still struggle with it.
I'm a minimalist and hate spending money on superfluous things, especially technology that becomes obsolete so fast but I'm allowing myself to splurge on me for a little while. I need the short highs. It's been a super rough week with the break up process, so I bought myself an Apple Watch for my birthday. (They're on sale at Target for $199!) It is definitely motivating and pretty cool how it integrates messages and calendars.
I need to repeat this to myself often. My ex is in a rebound relationship with one of his former ex's already, under a month. She may just be a super available rebound or he may have broken up with me to date her. I don't know. It makes me question everything. I couldn't cut ties on Facebook. Too hard to let go. I wish I never saw it. I've backtracked so much. He unfriended me after the picture was posted. I'm sure he didn't want me to see it. As badly as I want someone new, I just can't. ðŸ˜¢
Latest progress pictures. This month has been up and down. I put a lot of my focus into working out. I joined a Pilates/hot yoga studio 1.5 wks ago and have gone 6 times so far. At the same time I would go through days where I had no appetite, nauseous and sick from depression and anxiety spells. I know not eating is not healthy but I'm doing what I can. The last 6 weeks have honestly been about just putting one foot in front of the other even though I have no idea where I'm going.
Before picture to now. 5 months. I'm not intensely dieting or counting calories, not watching what I eat or working out for hours a day. I just pack lunch, don't snack, and have averaged 1.5 workouts a week since January. I'm wanting to up the intensity now though. I want to get to pre-pregnancy clothes by Gavin's 5th birthday. Yes, I said 5th.. ðŸ™„
Getting at it! It's almost June and I'm only 10ish pounds down. I know I can focus much more than I have been. Giving it 100%!
The importance of goals. I made mine for the week, for 3 months, 6 months, 1 year, 2 years, and 3 years for how to become a personal trainer and studio owner. My goal is SO far out of my range of skills but I do have unwavering faith that I'll find a way to make it happen. ðŸ’•ðŸ’ªðŸ™Œ Get at it this week! Full article here: https://www.tonyrobbins.com/mind-meaning/h
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It's green so it has to be good for me! ðŸ˜ I broke down and bought a Ninja blender. I hate vegetables. I realized the last time I ate a veggie that wasn't lettuce was probably last year if I'm being honest. So I'm making a genuine effort to eat more veggies. I crave smoothies in the summer so this is where I'm gonna start. I can't outwork a bad diet. I know this but I somehow thought because I'm so much bigger now than my marathon days that weight would just fall off because I'm moving more.
So my goals for the week of the 22nd. 1. 6 classes at the gym - I made it to 3. I forgot we went out of town Friday - Monday. 2. Close my rings 5/7 days - technically none, but I upped my red ring to 600 active calories a day from 400 before and hit 400 5/7 days. 3. Pack 4 lunches - huge fail here. We had two lunch meetings and no work on Friday. I have only averaged 1 workout a week before. This week will be better.
Let's do this. Shoot for the moon ðŸŒ™. If you fail, you'll still be among the stars âœ¨! I finally faced up to the reality that my effort for the first half of this year has been lackluster. It's on my mind but I'm really lacking in execution. Unfortunately my "pay off debt" goals weren't really getting anywhere either. I blamed my lack of progress on trying to do 2 things at once. Reality was I just lost focus and stopped doing the little things every day.
I'm crying uncontrollably again for the 2nd night in a row. It's been 2 heartbreaking days for me but not in the sense that I'm grieving him, I'm grieving the loss of love for myself. I have spent well over $1500 on stuff I would never buy. Doing things I would never do. Chasing material happiness. I feel like the morning after when you realize even tho it temporarily numb the pain, it hurts even more now. So now what do I do?
Last week's goals: 1. 6 classes at the studio - I made it to 4, up 1 from the previous week. 2. Close my rings 5/7 days - Watch died or I forgot it 3 days of the days of the week but I would have closed 4/7. Doubled from last week. ðŸ’ª 3. Under calories 3/4 days - didn't track but I'm sure I was under fri, sat, sun. 4. Get 80g of protein in every day - didn't track and know I didn't get close to this. Overall I improved from last week so ðŸ™Œ.
This week's goals. These are helping me focus and have a "just do it" attitude when I think about skipping a workout. We have to sign in to classes at the studio and on Sunday one of the teachers remembered my name! So I'm doing something right! Upped the ante on some previous goals. Added a new goal to be mindful about adding veggies to my nutrition. Let's do it!
My only goal for 2017 has been developing truly lifelong healthy habits and losing the weight. I gave myself a timeline of 18 months to lose 60-70 pounds. I wanted the focus to be on habits, not weight so I got rid of the scale. After 5 months, I was only down 10 pounds, averaged 1.4 workouts a week and still ate pretty bad. I said I was trying but deep down I knew I was selling myself way short. I know that is not my best effort. Are you really doing your best?
As you lose weight, you burn less calories resting and exercising each day. If you were exercising though, you get stronger and have more endurance to move and lift more in the same amount of time so you can combat the drop in calories burned from the weight loss. The more you exercise, the higher impact your nutrition has on how you feel. Exercise motivates you to eat cleaner. Which leads to weight loss. And the cycle continues. You need to do both for long term effectiveness.
Nutrition summary for last week. MyFitnessPal daily calorie goal is 1490. Averaged 1477 calories!! Wooohoooo!! Rocked my calories this week! ðŸ’ª Protein was only 16% of daily macros though, so I still need to work on that.
Week of June 5th goals recap: 1. 6 classes at the studio âœ… 2. Close my rings 6/7 days - 5/7! Was feeling really drained come Sunday so I took another rest day. Huge improvement over previous week. 3. Under 1500 calories a day - âœ… also HUGE improvement. 4 120g of protein a day - ðŸš« only averaged 60g a day. 5. One serving of veggies a day - ðŸš« 2/7 days.. overall I felt AWESOME about last week ðŸ™ŒðŸ‘ðŸ‘ Math says I torched 2.3 lbs last week! Ready to rock out another one even better! Hap
Building on the progress from the last week now that I know I can hit 1, 2, 3. Focusing on macronutrients this week. Trying to remember the last time I lost 30 pounds. I worked my butt off for a month and only lost 1 pound but I kept persisting and the next month I lost 11 pounds. If you put the work in, your body will change. Consistency is the key to lasting change.
My size 14 jeans from last year fit!! Like I could wear them the whole day fit! Yesterday I was feeling soooo down and discouraged. Felt fatter and uglier than ever. I needed this! ðŸ™Œ
Sometimes you have to change your surroundings to change your outlook. I love Denver so much. Everyone is so open and grounded. I swear that much activity around nature changes people at a cellular level. Ready to bring back this new energy and focus to my life.
The definition of self-love. Thinking and acting in a way that is true to yourself for the betterment of yourself for only you! I have been really negative to myself since I saw a photo that was taken with my friends in Denver. I wanna say I look huge compared to them to but the truth is I really am big compared to them. It's who I am right now. 10-20 lbs/year every year since college is now very visible. It's a third of me added onto me. At my highest it was almost double! That is a lot and yes
Last week I returned from vacation on Tuesday so I didn't really track for the week. I made it to 1 class at the studio and forgot to pack lunch all week so I'm sure my calories were higher. Back at it this week!
Haven't taken progress photos in a while. Latest set. I weighed myself on my friends scale yesterday too. Down 16 lbs since January. I don't keep a scale in my house. I get obsessive and I can already think of how many "fat" days I've avoided because the scale told me a number I didn't feel. I don't let the scale steal those skinny days from me anymore. I focus on hitting my nutrition and fitness goals and that is it.
Last week I struggled getting back in the routine. Work was busy. I was nervous cus my review was coming up and kept skipping my workout over lunch. This week I will definitely do better! Those weeks where I hit 5-6 classes and kept my calories within target, I know I lost weight. Now I just have to be consistent.
Still hate swimsuits in public but it's easier not to hate them when they are cute and have flattering lines. It's still like two sizes too small but fake it til you make it!
Boom! Closed all 3 today! But I ate like crap... tomorrow I will track my calories again. I can't wait to see that scale flash in the 170s next time!
Sweat literally dripping down my nose, sides of my face and neck from 15 minutes of BBG.. only did half of the workout. Trying to incorporate these little HIIT sessions into my week for some cardio work especially if I miss a class at the studio. I hate them but I can suffer through 15 minutes for the good of my heart. Eventually I may even start running again.. ðŸ˜’
So I was a good girl and meal prepped on Sunday night before bed. It took maybe 10 minutes of actual work over 45 minutes while I put my son to bed. I haven't strayed from my planned lunches. The chicken salad is the last one left! It's these little things that take a bit of behavior modification at first that lead to the big changes down the road. One week at a time. Weight loss is addicting when you've finally figured it out and got it down!
Breakfast of champions! So it took me a long, looooong time to realize that losing weight is not complicated, restrictive, or hard. It's your life and your life should always be fun, happy and strong! I eat CoCo puffs, Peanut Butter Puffs, or Rice Crispies almost every single day for breakfast. I love it. It works for me. No sense in fighting it.
Went to 4 classes last week and stayed under my calorie target for the week! Hoping the scale trends down. Really trying to focus hard the next 6 months!
I don't know if you all are like me but this gets me every time.. those nights I don't think about lunch the next day or the days I don't think about dinner are the ones that I make bad choices. I didn't meal prep lunch this week and it's been a disaster.. all because I was too lazy to cut up that watermelon. Planning to succeed tomorrow!
I am struggling with this today. Really feeling isolated from the world today being a mom dealing with being single. I have always felt on the outside looking in as a single person. Now that my son is about to start school, I just feel rejected. Surrounded by married couples, excited friends who are getting engaged, proud pregnant wives. And I just feel stuck. The things I want in life are happening to everyone around me and for some reason, I'm excluded. And today it's hard. I wonder how long
I know this is "bad" food. We all know what we should be eating, but life is all about balance. Yesterday I woke up to 20 pounds lost since January 15. Could I have lost this faster? Probably. Would I have gained it back by now? Possibly. Would I still be motivated to keep the scale trending down? Probably not. Your journey is exactly that: YOURS! Do want you need to to stay sane, limit frustration, enjoy your life, and meet your goals.
Right when I was finally feeling better after my horrible wretched breakup, I find out my sister died suddenly at age 23 from an aneurism. I haven't really said it out loud yet and my family has not made any announcements yet. It feels pretty isolating. After 12 hours of delayed flights and cancels, we finally made it to North Carolina and we can't see her for at least 2 more days because of red tape.
Finally cleared to go back to yoga after the car accident. Message today was embracing the change of new season. This year has been the worst, hardest, most painful year of my life. I thought losing the love of my life was hard, but then my baby sister died suddenly and not even two weeks later I was in a bad car accident, car totaled and hospitalized for 2 days. I'm trying to fight for the new season but struggling to look forward.
I've been doing a lot of dreaming lately. It's born out of this growing frustration. I heard this phrase today and wow, does it fuel the fire?! What would you do if you knew you could not fail? Today I registered for the NASM certified personal training exam and study course. I also registered for yoga teacher training. By the end of year I will be a certified personal trainer and yoga instructor. Make that leap.
Success happens in the little things compounded over time. You got this!
I'm back focusing on my weight loss goals again. Luckily my weight has been holding steady through the all of the shit that has happened in the last 2 months. I'm able to work out again and I'm ready to finish out the year moving forward. 3 months left and I'm determined to start it in the 150s, pass the CPT exam and complete yoga teacher training. I'm all in.
Macros for the last week. My goal was to get at least 80g of protein and eat just 1 serving of vegetables a day. I have smashed it. I'm putting the slow carb diet to the test. I said I'd try it for one week and if I like it then I'd go for another week and on and on. Well it's been great! Avg 1500 cals/day and feeling very full and satisfied, eating foods I enjoy, and my sugar intake speaks for itself. No withdrawals, headaches, or stomach issues. Very few cravings. Looking forward to week 2!
Having another "I feel like I'm going to be like this forever" moment. I have been eating super clean for the past 3 weeks and had these expectations that I would have dropped 6-10 pounds by now. I'm down 1 pound from my weight 6 weeks ago. I have never been so rigid and so healthy with food before and I'm mystified and pissed that this is all the progress I've made. But all I can do is keep going, no matter how slow..
Haven't taken a progress photo in a while. This is morning after cheat day. Weight is just a guess, I don't own scale. Ready for week 3 of eating slow-carb. Upping my focus this week. I want to give it ðŸ’¯
Tried the Running for Weight Loss app day 1 today. The app was good and this graphic is really cool but I am way too heavy to start running. My knees and feet started hurting about halfway through. This is bad pain. Running is going on the back burner until I lose more weight.
Soooo excited for Halloween this year!! First time going trick or treating with my son ever! ðŸ¤—ðŸ‘ðŸ˜‚
Yoga teacher training is kicking my butt!! Burned 1329 calories active calories on Monday, 151 fitness minutes, 16 hours standing. This is basically every class. ðŸ˜ªðŸ˜´ So much more challenging than I thought it would be!
Latest progress pics.. down 22 lbs since Jan. 15th. Slow but not quitting.
Turkey trot 5k done! I think it was around 35 minutes. Not bad for not training at all and walking the first mile with my parents! Iâ€™m proud of myself!
40 wks, 3 days pregnant (22 lb gain)
18 weeks (+3 lbs)
21 weeks! (+9)
29 weeks (+16)
26 weeks (+16)
39 weeks (+17)
august 2007 - 165 lbs size 14; march 2009 - 141 lbs size 8
august 2007 - 165 lbs; february 2010 - 143 lbs
This is my warning sign! I need to look at this often.
love, love love Jamie Eason!! so pretty and what i think is a perfect body!
love love love JAMIE EASON!! she's is amazing! great person! and damn hot for 32!!
january 27th, 2009! woohoo!
At my smallest.. feb. 23rd 2009 - 141 lbs, still 25 pounds from goal..
feb 23rd 2009 - 141 lbs
feb. 23rd 2009 - 141 lbs