SCARLETMOONOWL

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There seems to for me always be some new always be some new wall for me to bust my way through or climb over or go around. I am very weary but I am not giving up, giving up equals dying and there is still too much I want to see and do.

For whatever reason, my brain chemistry is such that clinical severe depression is part of my reality, yet none of the current antidepressants on the market work on my body except Lithium, which I refuse to use because of the side effects. And what is the point of having the life if I am a zombie and cannot enjoy it? So, I have no answers where this leaves me as to how to treat my depression and how to get past or through or around it to work on get my body to a normal size. I am committed to getting it to a normal size, so I will have to figure it.

I think if I can figure out how to stay up mentally my motivation will stay constant, because when I feel well I truly enjoy exercising, cooking, eating right, do what is needed to get to the point where I am healthy physically.

I know that my life will not magickally change when I lose weight, that what is missing from it will still be missing from it, if I do not work to fill in the holes. So, I need to figure out how to motivate myself to fill the holes, to develop a life the has something in it besides my struggle to survive.

I am committed to controlling my depression, I am committed to fixing my health, and I am committed to getting a life.

I am tired of making promises to myself and other people that I will do this, that or the other within a certain amount of time, because I don’t and then I feel worse about myself and like I lied to my friends and family. I am going to promise not to quit.

Blessings,
Ciara


Member Since: 7/9/2010

Fitness Minutes: 1,769

My Goals:
To live each and every day in love. Love of others. Love of the Earth. Love of what I have been given. And love of myself.

To accept with grace what challenges come my way and remember that while things may change, no thing perishes. Good can and will enter my life, just as bad can and will enter and leave it.


My Program:
To embrace fully all that I am and rejoice in it.

To celebrate both my strengths and my weaknesses.

To rest when I need it, to play when I want to, and to always love myself enough to do what needs doing to be healthy.

Exercise 6 days a week, this means movement beyond the usual. Try for a walk outside 6 days a week.

Spend time working with my inner being everyday.



Personal Information:
I am an eclectic, elemental solitary Witch. My primary gift is working with displace entities (ghosts). I am hereditary, though no one in my family admits to there gifts but me.

I am a bit of a gypsy, what I am makes it hard to stay in anyone place for too long. I am also agoraphobic, go figure. I have lived everywhere at one time or another, right now I am in Colorado. I am waiting for my first winter.

If you have questions, or need help, please just Spark me.


Other Information:
I love all things ghost, vampire, lycanthrope, and arcane. I am into ancient history, languages, magick, powders, oils, caims, herbs. My favorite books are the LKH Anita Blake books, Twilight, Haunted, Dracula, Maggie Shayne vampire series. Favorite movies are Twilight, Dracula 2000, Haunted, A Haunting, Hostel II, Sherlock Holmes(2009), Queen of the Damned, The Blade Series, Tomb Raider, Resident Evil, Final Destination, Legion, Rose Red, IT, etc. Music, I like nature to metal, just no twangy country.




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Comments
  • v TX.PATRICIA
    emoticon emoticon emoticon emoticon emoticon emoticon emoticon emoticon emoticon emoticon emoticon

    Happy Birthday to You!!

    emoticon emoticon emoticon emoticon emoticon emoticon emoticon emoticon emoticon emoticon emoticon

    .•*´`•.¸ .•*´`•.¸ .•*´`•.¸ .•*´`•.¸ .•*´`•.¸ .•*´•.¸ .•*´`•.¸
    .•*´`•.¸ .•*´`•.¸ .•*´Show Your•*´`•.¸ .•*´•.¸ .•*´`•.¸
    .•*´`•.¸Determination & Accountability•.¸ .•*´`•.¸
    .•*´`•.¸ .•*´`•.¸ .•*´`•.¸ .•*´`•.¸ .•*´`•.¸ .•*´•.¸ .•*´`•.¸
    1367 days ago
  • v TX.PATRICIA
    emoticon emoticon emoticon emoticon emoticon emoticon emoticon emoticon emoticon emoticon emoticon

    Happy Birthday to You!!

    Born October 24, you are possessed of some remarkable talent, and yet you are so laid-back in the display of that talent that you are quite able to disappear into the crowd and avoid the spotlight when you so choose -- secure in the knowledge that you can and will attract a large and appreciative audience at a moment's notice. You have a way of expressing yourself that puts other people at ease, and even when you are imparting information that is quite serious there is an easiness that invites attention and appreciation.

    While you are perfectly capable of being by yourself, you prefer to ply your trade in the company of others -- especially groups of people who share your motives and methods. You are more than a team player; you are, in fact, a team builder.

    Today’s Scorpio Horoscope: Are you really willing to do what you said you'll do? Now's the time to be true to yourself!

    You share a birthday with: Kevin Kline, actor; F. Murray Abraham, actor; J.P. "Big Bopper" Richardson, rocker; Moss Hart, playwright.

    Hope your day was wonderful!

    emoticon emoticon emoticon emoticon emoticon emoticon emoticon emoticon emoticon emoticon emoticon

    .•*´`•.¸ .•*´`•.¸ .•*´`•.¸ .•*´`•.¸ .•*´`•.¸ .•*´•.¸ .•*´`•.¸
    .•*´`•.¸ .•*´`•.¸ .•*´Show Your•*´`•.¸ .•*´•.¸ .•*´`•.¸
    .•*´`•.¸Determination & Accountability•.¸ .•*´`•.¸
    .•*´`•.¸ .•*´`•.¸ .•*´`•.¸ .•*´`•.¸ .•*´`•.¸ .•*´•.¸ .•*´`•.¸

    1731 days ago
  • v SHAKENMA
    They say, "You can't give a smile away; it always comes back." The same is true of a kind word or a conversation starter. What goes around, comes around.
    Susan RoAne

    Just thought I'd thank some of my friends and teammates for their support!

    And spark a little Spark love too.

    Spark rocks!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
    1874 days ago
  • v DANGERMONKEY
    Gorgeous pictures :) Have a fantastic day! Keep on keepin on!
    1974 days ago
  • v MMAZZIE
    emoticon Happy Valentines Day! emoticon
    1986 days ago
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