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Promises - Smart Promises - July 2017 ..... ????

It's a Journey not a Destination.
GOALS. I want to LOSE ANOTHER 30 lbs.
This is year three of saying that. WTF???
COMPANIONS Wanted.... Daily Checkin? Apprecaited.

Weight Loss. Fitness. "Forget skinny - I want to be a badass".
It's been my "mission" since forever. Priority numero uno. With plenty of rebellions to discover all the ELSE of life. But.... Honestly, with this still on my list.... I don't feel okay... I feel unable to let it go as a goal and so YES YES I will take it up again and embrace it.

I've been MAINTAINING a long time now. Hooray for me.
But not at my goal weight. And it nags at me.

Smaller body, less stress on the frame and organs.
Smaller body and clothing sizes.... brass ring from forever ago and the challenges of all that remains.

My girlfriends who have 'made it to their goal weight' discover all kinds of disappointment at the lack of miracle that that by itself creates.

It's my job to understand how specific this goal is.
I will have to give up comfort foods and fun with food in order to reduce calories below maintenance and back to Weight loss. I remember listening to the RIGOROUS EXTRA walks it took to take off the last 20 lbs for my friends! Why would it be different for ME? It won't be. I"VE GOT TO BE WILLING TO KICK SOME ASS - That ass being MINE!

I do not walk anything even remotely like 10,000 steps a day.
I am sedentary by habit if not nature.
Not sure what I'm willing to do about this.

I will explain this later.

Mission Control is my new nickname. From being lifelong obese girl navigating a big body and a whole lot of adversity... How to navigate the mean boys at the bus stop, the too small airplane seat... translated into work and job descriptions where analytical thinking and cost:benefit scalability etc were strong points for me.
A lot of my innate CREATVITY took a huge back seat to all that preventative thinking and being and doing.

NOW IS TIME TO USE that "mission control" ability for my creative good wellbeing and playfulness.

Re-Educating wrongly firing muscles, yes.
Steering around my own potholes of stinking thinking? Yeah...How bout that too! That would be great.
Mission Control is christened anew this week with new meanings for laser skills.

When my trainer guessed my wt at 190 last week and I AM 165... I sort of freaked.
Stop comparing myself to others... was the upshot of a night spent looking at photos on the internet, with the wrong motive.

Next day I looked and celebrated the Befores and Afters that one can now find so readily. I WILL LOOK for MOTIVATION.

I'm 58 yrs old. I want goal wt before 60. 59 would be even better.
And it's Do-Able!

S M A R T goals include TimeBound - hey

The relationship stuff.... "that's a totally different meeting", as my friend Jenny would say!


60 is the new 22
Yes. Start something! It's time. You know it.
And thank goodness peers are also feeling this.

Move. Dance with it. Explore. NOT TOO LATE!! Nope!
Gotta be starting something I AM WORTH IT Getting to the finish line.

and 'wt loss' / reaching 'goal wt' HAS GOT to move over!
which means has got to get Off My List!

Goals .... Yes. I want it. I want 135. That's 30 more lbs.
After losing 70... and maintaining with ups and downs for a couple of years.

Lifestyle changes? My butt still wants to sit all the time.
Can I find FUN in moving in nature and not just tread milling?

Something's Gotta Give

Drink the water. Move and Breathe. Dance. And...
Make the Difference....

be the change....
sweat your prayers....

There is no remaining, no place to stay.
Every Day it is New Again
Want Things

SPARK 2010 has changed my story. But the story goes on. And will go on.

Stop putting food in place of other desires
take small actions toward your dreams

Move More, Eat Less
"the scale is a ouiji board"

Keep It Simple (KISS)

245-165 done SPARKED DONE!
NEW GOAL WT 135 (maybe?)
Now's the time
ODAAT (one day at a time)

NOW - By the numbers
-------------------- 2016 167- ______? 50's?

167.8 whew nelly. Another bender. Easter party and then some.
163.8 at home scale (165ww) 3/22/16 Mom health scare binge week
******* 3/10/15 afraid to look at ww
162.6 3/3/16
164.2 2/17/16
166.4 2/3/16

----------------------------------- 2015 173-162

162 12/30/15
166.2 12/2/15
166.5 11/4/15
162 10/15/15]166.4 9/2/15
169.2 8/19/15
173.6 7/8/15 joined WW's Group in MRY for connection
***Got sync'd FitBit... and realize how Sendentary I am (wow)
5000 steps would be a lot for me including elliptical 30minutes
So... ACTIVITY MUST BECOME A FOCUS moving forward!****


I've been in a dialogue narrative drama exercise practice with Food and Body my entire life. Up and down and round and round.
ED, 12step, Addiction to Perfection (Woodman), Geneen Roth, Oprah, and all between. SPARK 2010 has changed my story. But the story goes on. And will go on.



Masten House to Laurel Ave
176 highest - 166-176 waffling
Not thinking about food plan, not tracking,
joined health club but not really using it.

2013 - Garrapata to Masten House
Slow Weight Gain 153 (lowest) to 176 (highest)
Remicade/improvement weight steady but out of kilter
Regain strength is desired focus
But housing troubles cause Big Change and stress
Move from Winchester (20 years residence)
Purchase Condo (but don't like it and relationship trouble)
Joe leaves for CA
I decide to follow him to CA and "move in lightly" at Condo
R&D - is my story for this script
Unstable - Adrenally crashed from Meds and stress -
Housing and relocation....
*Feathering nest becomes the SCRIPT
Food is central to nesting
Gained 20#'s - Athletas too tight must be put to back of closet
Illness and Medications
Lowest Wt 155/153 - but partly because unable to eat
Diagnosed Colitis and Rx for Remicade
ATHLETA PANTS!!! size 12/14

199.8 1/1/11 ONEderland!
198.2 1/9/11
196.8 1/17/11
199.7 1/25/11 nonononon!
197.8 1/26/11 hmm
197.4 2/8/11 that's all?
197.2 2/16/11 turtle
196 2/22/11
195.6 3/8/11
193.8 3/18/11
191.8 3/22/11
193.6 4/21/11 a month of plateau and coasting
189 5/30/11
184.8 6/23/11
188 7/12/11 ONWARD & DOWNWARD
INTO Spark Year #2 (July 2011-July 2012)
185 done!
184.5 done!
183 done! 8/18/11
177.6 !!! 10/26/11 (these 4-5 #'s were slow in coming off!)
235 Winter/Spring
225 lb Dr Orelind 2010
222 lb Spark Start 7/10
215 lb 8/16/10 done!
212 lb plateau Sept
210 lb 9/28/10
212 lb CA trip gain U.C.
208 lb 10/20/10
206.4 10/28/10
205.4 11/1/10
202.6 11/8.10
204.8 11/15/10
202.6 11/19/10
204.5 11/29/10 uh....okay...
202 - 20! done!
201 12/24/10
200 12/27/10


Lose Weight Sustainably And LIVE LIFE FULLY

I've been in OneDerLand for a few years now
(a big accomplishment coming from the high 2's)
I've been here A LONG TIME now.... and I now want to get to Chart Like "Goal Weight" -- I want to slim down another 30-40 lbs.
I'm OK as a human being at this weight (that's a big step for a lifetime dieter) But I'm NOT DONE!

weigh, measure, track, water, exercise, Be Present.
Aim for consistent activity... and MORE
MOVE ing
MOVE ment
Do more of what makes you happy

body parts - ankles feet hips...MOTION
mind and spirit

Make sensible choices
WW wednesdays
Spark daily
Close the Kitchen early
h.a.l.t the after dinner snacking and no cocktail hour without crudités
Water. Track. Move. ODAAT

OLD PAGES -- saving for reflections

Hi there. Me and You. I've been on and off Spark for two years after a very successful SPARKtastic 2010=2012 where I lost 80lbs! Yes. I did that! With the companionship, goals and support of this community. Since then I've been waffling.

Name: Paula Jean
STARTING WT 235 then 223 (Spark Start, July 2010)
Benchmark WT 177.6 **11/1/11
GOAL #1 WT 175 11/8/11 "overweight" not "obese"
GOAL #1.5 150-160 Maintained 2012-2013 then gained +8!
slowly +15-20

I WANT TO FEEL GOOD LIKE I DID BEFORE... When tracking and eating "clean" felt entirely second nature even the "work" of it was fun and centered and just how I did things.
So Please Join ME. Let's hang out together AND LIGHT THE FIRE!!

GOAL WT 135#
Track Daily. Move Daily track movement too somehow.
Write menus and shopping lists if it helps.

You know how it works. It works when you work it.

Fully Commit
Gather stones Move stones
Seriously P. Now

TRACK, WATER, MOVE, Eat Sustainably
Fresh Vegetables & Fruits

*"The scale is a ouiji board, a dishonest fortune teller. There are no answers on the scale" Onward & Downward is all I need to know.*

Shi(F)t Happens! Daily Practice. Honesty and Loyalty to Self. Goal by Goal. Reward to reward.

Let Energy Rise. Stay with transitions pivots remember to remember. Onward and Downward. Faith

OTHER GOALS!! to set!!!

*"The scale is a ouiji board, a dishonest fortune teller. There are no answers on the scale" Onward & Downward is all I need to know.*

I am thrilled and grateful be sharing this path with so many of you remarkable friends here. Thank you!

*** New Boots Reward (even if not exactly 175)*****
Coming Soon:
175 (Goal #1 - Reward New Boots! - boots! that zip and everything! DONE!!!!

169-165 Holding here in treatment for UC. New Food Plan in the Works. Whew! Whew! Taking a breath.
++++ Weight Gain After Illness Period

Lost 35 lbs in 2010 -- 23 with Spark! Crossed the ribbon into ONEderland on January 1, 2011 (made this goal so sweet).
Setting new goals for 2011... and looking forward to the journey.
2010-2012 colitis
2012-2013 uprooting house and place anxietymenopause

DIET & SCALE HISTORY(a life-long fibonacci sequence):
childhood obesity and eating disorder family DIET dysfunction
highest wt age 17 299 - Duke Rice Diet
145-160 after Duke and off to College
180-230 gain at College and Maintained for many years yo-yoing
Optifast w Oprah down to 145 then up again
Highest Wt ---Lifetime, 299 lbs (age 18 -lost 150# Duke Rice Diet)
Highest Wt ---This Decade, 238-244 lbs (after my dad died in 2007)

SET-POINTs & YOYO Talisman/Swings:
*145 (for a minute in 1982) after Duke Diet 299-145
*175-210 college gain & after maintain
*165 (for 2 minutes in 1989) after Optifast 210-165
*Maintained 189-198 1990-2000 (oa, nutritionist,personal trainer)
*Wt gain 10-20# 2000 (job loss, bf loss, isolation)
*Maintained 207-226 2000-2010 (yoyo dieting, mostly WW)
*Wt gain 226-242 2006-2007 (caregiver during dad's cancer&death)
*Wt drop 242-235 after dad's death 2007-2008
*Turned 50 and maintain 226-235 in 2009-2010
*Then SPARK'd

Name: Paula Jean
STARTING WT 235 then 223 (Spark Start, July 2010)
CURRENT WT 177.6 **11/1/11
GOAL #1 WT 175 11/8/11 Almost DONE!!! "overweight"
GOAL #1.5 150-160 Maintained 2012-2013 then gained +8!


Member Since: 7/15/2010

Fitness Minutes: 19,677

My Goals:
My main goal for now is to create a positive lifestyle change - both physically and emotionally.

WANTED 136 (-100#)

Fitness Goals:
Exercise Inside or Out -- 4x wk 40minutes

Hydrate: Drink 1 Liter Bottle Water plus table waters

Weight: Slow & Steady Wins the Race

STEPS!!!! Get up to 10000!!

Like my new SPfriend Taziah, I'd like to break it down into 5lb losses so I can celebrate a lot of mini victories along the way to keep me feeling positive and motivated!

I started at 236 and got down to 153 but was back up to 176 at the end of 2015.

10% Goals (Rounded up):

170 Done
165 Done
2nd 10% 143 (lose 15#)
3rd 10% (lose 14#) to 130


Ht 5'4"
Highest Lifetime Wt: 299# 1976
Starting Wt: 236 2010
Lowest Wt: 152 2013
Goal Wt2: 135

My Program:
Whole Grains
Reduce sugar
Take supplements
Avoid white food
No soda - quit 5 yrs ago!

I am a person who actually THRIVES ON CONNECTION who, ironically, as an addictive / artistic personality

So. The path is..
ONward and Downward

Personal Information:
Hi. Paula is my name.
Turned 56 on 7/26/58
In PeriMenopause
(hot flashesmood swings. metabolism changes) And this life long journey is finding a new PushShove

very verbal. arty.

Other Information:
My name is Paula.
This is not about the history.
This is about NOW.
This is about ME. Moi.

New March perspective on 1-2 years of mtc/with gain.

in mind and body

arthritic feet need my help!

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