One year after I had my first little boy. He's 8 now, and I need to get back here!
After having my second little boy, I'm back up to 190.
My boys! Obviously, worth the weight gain, but I need to get healthy to keep up with them!
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During my journey on Spark, I have become a mom two times over. I have two beautiful boys who are full of energy and keep me on my toes! I want to always be able to keep up with my little guys. I want to climb mountains with them, and teach them to play tennis. I want to travel and run all over the world learning new things with them. And I want to do all these things with my grandchildren, too. I could not do any of these things in the shape I was in after my first pregnancy, and I knew I had to make some changes. I got to goal weight within a year after having my oldest (Nathan), then gained all the weight back and then some during my second pregnancy (Evan). Now my youngest is 4 years old, and I still have 50 pounds to lose to get back to my goal. It's a long road ahead, but my boys are worth it!
I have been a yo-yo dieter most of my life. I was an average sized child, and started gaining weight in high school. I got my driver's license and found it far too easy to visit the McDonald's in between all my school activities. Even though I was busy and active, I just wasn't eating the right things. I was always the "heavy" girl in my circle of friends. It was constantly on my mind, and every fun memory I have from my teenage years is tainted with the memory that I was never really comfortable in my own skin.
In college it just got worse. All that pizza and beer didn't help my figure, not to mention all the time sitting in the library, or sitting in class. I would get on a health kick and lose 10 or 15 pounds by over-exercising and expecting perfection of myself. Then I would binge or get sick, gain it all back and slip back into my bad habits.
Then I went to law school, and the stress made everything ten times worse. School was so difficult, and I didn't know anybody when I moved there. I felt like I was starting all over - making all new friends, learning to think a whole new way, and really being away from my family for the first time. I turned to food out of loneliness and worry. By the middle of my second year of law school, I was at my heaviest weight ever.
I felt miserable, and I decided to start turning things around. I started working out, and being kinder to myself. After I had lost about 10 pounds, I started to feel like myself again and I gained some confidence. I met my future husband, and I started to pull myself farther out of my spiral of misery. My husband has always been so supportive, and he often reminds me that he fell in love with me when I still weighed over 185 pounds. (That really helped when I was getting big with the pregnancy!)
I had really hard pregnancies. I lost 9 pounds in the first trimester because of all the morning sickness, then ended up gaining 50 pounds over the next 6 months. After I had my first son, the weight did not come off at all. For the first 6 months of his life, I was exhausted and didn't even try to take care of myself.
Then, one day, my son started crawling.
It was that day. The day we took a picture of him crawling. My whole future with him flashed in front of me, and it didn't look good. I saw myself sitting on the couch and watching him play - not playing with him. I saw us watching movies and eating potato chips - not getting out and experiencing the world. I saw him gaining weight in high school just like I did, and having all his memories tainted by his weight. I saw him having health problems because of bad eating habits. Finally, I saw him having to take care of diabetic, fat, sick, old me, instead of enjoying having a vibrant, fun mom. In that moment it occurred to me that I could not be a good mom to him if I didn't learn to take care of myself.
I love SparkPeople because it allows me to spend just the right amount of time thinking about my health and learning about how to take care of myself and my family. Before, when I tried to lose weight, I would become obsessive about numbers and perfection. SparkPeople doesn't make me obsessive about food. It helps me be kind to myself and forgive my little slips. It helps me keep my focus on the big picture. When I need support, it's here. When I feel like I'm starting to slip, my food tracker and the workout podcasts get me back on track.
Thanks to all of you who offer support and friendship on this website.
I want to weigh less than my husband.
I want to run a half-marathon in under 2 and a half hours.
I want to be a good role model for my sons and teach them good healthy habits.
I am tracking my food intake and workouts every day. I am trying to stay within my targets every day, and get at least 250 minutes of exercise every week.
| Pounds lost: 0.0