It's a pleasure to "meet" you. I know we both face an uphill battle but I also know that somewhere inside, we have it in us. The most important thing that I've learned so far in my very long journey is to never give up. Mistakes happen, we're human and by that definition; not perfect. I'm scared of failing as well but I think with a supportive community (like this) we can reach our goals!
Your Sparkpage really resonates with me. You sound like I feel (I have depression too). I hope you will feel better soon. I joined about 3 weeks ago and am just a couple pounds below my highest weight ever. I think this is the right place to come. I'm feeling really good about it, but scared too, that I'll fail. But let's try... 2349 days ago