Me at my highest weigth of 523. I'll post a recent picture as soon as i get one.
My son, the beach and me at 385, my lowest
Me on a good day.
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I started my weight loss journey 4 years ago at 523 pounds. I was born fat but I'm not going to die fat. I'm a 53 year old woman and I'm not giving up.
I'm not sure when it got out of control. I was always active, and solid. I was able to play hard, run, dance and do about anything I wanted. One day, I woke up and I was depressed and weighing 523 pounds. I'm not sure how I got there.
I have some ideas. Growing up in an abusive alcoholic family wasn't the best senario, losing a brother and my dad by the time I was 6 didn't help but I let myself get out of control over the years.
I used food as my friend, to hide from my stepdad's meanness, I used it to hide from any sort of relationship that came my way. The sad part is, any event in my life, I can recall all of the food that was involved; not the people but the food. To me, that is very sad.
About 8 years ago, I lost my job due to a change over. I became depressed, didn't get dressed, can't even remember brushing my teeth or changing out of my night clothes. Because of this, I expected my son, 12 at the time, to take on alot more responsibilities than he should have had to do.
In this time, I became wheelchair bound and depended on my family to help me survive. I developed cellulitis in my legs and had to go into the hospital. It was my birthday and now, I think of it as the best birthday of my life. I was in there for 2 weeks and I lost 38 pounds. That was when I decided I wanted to go on. In the next 7 months, I had lost another 60 pounds. I know in my heart that if I hadn't made some changes, I would not be here today.
I turned 50 and new I needed a change. My son was grown and independent, so my sister and I moved 2300 miles from our home, to California. It was the best thing, other than my son, that I have ever done. I found a great therapist that helped me to realize that I was a victim when I was younger, but I didn't have to be a victim the rest of my life.
As of today, i'm down to 392 with along way to go, but I'll get there. This has been an eye opening experience for me and one I am so glad I found. I have a great support team of my son, family and friends. I belong to Tops and believe we all need the help and all the support we can get. I have been out of the wheelchair for 2 years now and using crutches, soon hopefully, a cane. When I'm old, I don't want to be that little old lady sitting on her porch saying, " I WISH I had done that." I want to be the little old lady sitting there saying, " I DID DO THAT!"
For what I put my son thru, he has turned out to be a great person. He's now 25 and not long ago, I explained where I had come from and how I got to that point. I also appologized to him for putting him thru some of the things I had done. He was very forgiving and his comment to me was, "Mom, I wouldn't change a thing, because what we went thru is what made us who we are today. And we are alot stronger for it." That made it all worth while to me.
That's my story. I'm not posting it for sympathy because we all have our reasons for being where we are. I'm posting it because it helps to get it out and to pass it on. Hopefully to let others know that they aren't alone in this journey.
We Can Do This Because We Are Worth It!!!
Short Term Goals:
Drink my water daily.
Follow my eating plan.
Exercise atleast 5-5x/week.
FORGIVE MYSELF WHEN I MAKE A SLIP.
Long Term Goals:
Off of my crutches.
Go dancing again.
Go white water rafting and scuba diving.
I belong to Tops but I have my own eating plan that works for me. I eat 6 small meals a day and have found this keeps my metabolism up and running. I follow just a sensible diet of protein, good cards and low fat. I also swim 4x/week and do weight training 2/week. And, drink water water water...
I'm originally from Illinois but when I turned 50, I felt I needed a change and moved to California. I'm on the central coast and love the beaches. I have one son, who is my hero in so many ways. He's 25 and I'm proud to be his mom. I have a loving family (most of the time) :). I'm on disablity but am also in college and studying nutrition.
I love to read anything I can get my hands on.
Musis is a favorite of mine too, especially classic rock.
I guess one of my favorite sayings is from a song Tim McGraw, "Live like you were dying."
| current weight: 348.0