This page is for me. To vent, to inspire, to explore my thoughts and feelings. To figure out why i put up road blocks to my own success. To pursue the journey towards health and fitness; both physical and emotional, as well as spiritual. To heal.

5/25 the journey continues. slid back a little, but i'm not giving up and will keep pushing forward and pursuing my goals. i know that i can do this. i just need to stay focused on the day and not get too far ahead of myself or beat myself ...

This page is for me. To vent, to inspire, to explore my thoughts and feelings. To figure out why i put up road blocks to my own success. To pursue the journey towards health and fitness; both physical and emotional, as well as spiritual. To heal.

5/25 the journey continues. slid back a little, but i'm not giving up and will keep pushing forward and pursuing my goals. i know that i can do this. i just need to stay focused on the day and not get too far ahead of myself or beat myself up over past mistakes. eyes on the prize, pressing ahead. i feel very motivated and focused and confident in my ability to achieve the goals that i've set for myself. i will not stop trying, i will not give up, i will keep going until i've grabbed hold of the prize; my health, my fitness, my life.

10/6/09 How embarrassing writing that date down!!! but, the journey continues and yes, I am back. I will keep going and not give up! I've started over so many times that this is an all too familiar feeling. I need to get past the start and see what the middle of this race looks like. So, here I go...again...but no worries. This just may be the time I get to the next stage. Can't wait to see what's there!

10/22/09 Excited to see the scale move finally. Today is a bit of a high stress day, so I'm trying to breathe and pray. Have a lot of stuff to do. Take Bren to the doctors, Jon is sick, pick up Olivia from SF, clean the house and disinfect all the sick germs out of here!! Better stay focused and not turn to food for my stress relief. Pray, pray, pray!!
10/10/09 this week has been ok. i did get in my days of running/walking and my knee is still managing to hold up. if i can keep building slowly, i think it will heal nicely. i just don't want it to fall apart on me again. i'm trying to trust the training and just follow the schedule. i want to be strong when the race comes up in March and i don't want to have any lingering issues. it feels good to move again. my body is tired but happy. it feels good to be active again. hope i can stay with it and weather through any changes that seem to come up in life without letting my exercise suffer. need to focus on my goal and not be distracted or deterred.

11/1/09 well, good work out. feel like i really pushed myself, especially through the mental barrier. it seems like so many times, i become my own worse enemy. that needs to stop. i need to treat myself like a friend. i need to not be afraid to do things for me and to do things that help me succeed and reach my goals. it's almost like i don't think i deserve to be successful. like it's somehow better to take care of other's needs and neglect my own. this thinking is wrong. it's a total lie. so, today, i'm going to make friends with myself and treat myself kindly. and i'm going to try and not feel guilty about it. :)

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