5,500-6,999 SparkPoints 5,885

This is around my heaviest, 290 lbs...clearly I enjoy having my pic taken ;)

37 wks pregnant with my 1st. I now appreciate and love my body for being able to carry my children

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Everyone talks about that moment, right. The one where they saw a vacation picture, or noticed their reflection in a window, or had something hurtful said to them.

My moment was in the car, talking with my partner, while our kids slept in the backseat. I told him that I wanted to get active again, because I thought it would be good for my mental health. I have anxiety, and at different times in my life it has felt unmanageable. After our second child, our lives got a lot busier and the stress had been getting to me. What was holding me back was the fear that if I spent those few hours focusing on myself, that I would be a bad mother.

What about the routines and the schedules and the repetition that kept me feeling like I was accomplishing things? Would that mess up our kids? Would it mess up me?

My partner told me that he couldn't do much about my personal thoughts, but doing something for myself and my health was not taking away time from our kids and it certainly didn't make me a bad mother. I cannot fully explain the relief I felt at that moment.

Maybe I just needed the reassurance that those few hours were not selfish, they would give me more time with my kids in the long-run. And the time that we would spend together would be so much richer.

My daughter is a toddler and my son will be one before I know it. I want to be able to keep up with them. I want to run and jump and play WITH them, not just watch from a bench. I want to get my body in a place where it can handle that and more.

Being a mother has taught me many things; including a deeper appreciation for my body and all that it is capable of. I will build on this new found love and reach my goals.

*I am going to focus on my own health journey and stop comparing myself to others

*I am going to continue to love my body in all its beautiful forms and shapes

Member Since: 7/11/2011

Fitness Minutes: 4,917

My Goals:
SW: 288.4, 7/15/16
1st GW: 250

My Program:
Workout Schedule:

30 Min Cardio/5x/week

Nurition Plan:

Track consistently on SP

Personal Information:
33 years old

Other Information:
-BMI: 43.8, Obese
-CW: 288.6 lbs

Read More About CUPCAKEHARLOT - Profile Information moved here. (Updated July 24)

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 current weight: 286.4 
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    Hi, my name is Rudo, I am on the Gardner team with you, and really enjoyed the intro on your sparkpage. We can do this, my motto is "NEVER GIVE UP, NEVER SURRENDER", and until I get to my goal weight, I am going to keep at it. If you need any encouragment, i am only a few clicks away. Best of luck
    1252 days ago
  • v HEYNOW22
    Hi Im on the Gardeners team with you for the Challenge - have a great day!
    1262 days ago
    I just signed up for a virtual race for the week of Feb 24 - March 2, and noticed that you had too! Let's go virtual 5K'ing!!! emoticon
    1365 days ago
  • v LOSINIT87
    I effing love your screen name. Oh, and the goal to outrun the zombies is totally legit. ;)
    1369 days ago
  • v PUNKY100
    Well I am lucky enough to work in downtown Minneapolis, so I use the skyway on my walks when it's cold or raining. Even though some people are SO slow through there lol I also discovered that I LOVE WATP!!!! It's easy enough to do every day, and since it's inside, bad weather is a non-factor. I do it RIGHT when I get home, which is a good habit to get into. That way I don't get distracted by something else before I start. And my online friends know that it's better for me to get it out of the way right away than start something and do it later. :-P

    Let me know if any of this helps you! :-)
    1369 days ago
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