Hey! Sorry for not getting back to you in forever! I just got back at college so I've been super busy! Busy with school stuff, friends, and unfortunately eating! Ugh! Gotta get back on track with that but thats a different story! I'll probably blog about it soon.
Anyways, you definitely shouldn't feel unworthy of losing weight! I mean, I totally get that feeling. I've always been treated like crap by friends so I think I have some of the mentality of I'm not good enough for anything really, including looking good and being happy and healthy. I KNOW I'm worth it, but at the same time the devil in my brain is going welllllll I don't know about that. So you are not alone on that point!
As for the being afraid to fail part I can completely relate! I HATE failing. I think thats why I end up quitting a lot on my diet or exercise. Its not so much that I'm lazy (which sometimes I definitely am), but I think its just easier for me to "choose" to stay the same because then I don't fail. I did what I "wanted" to do. I'm so afraid to do something like lose all this weight and then never be able to get to my goal weight (which is how I feel lately because I have only GAINED weight .. it sucks) or I'm afraid that I'll gain it all back.
But you are right that we can get past this stupid plateau (I don't even know if you're still really in that plateau because I've been so bad about getting on Spark). I'm just REALLY feeling down on myself lately. College is awesome but my friends eat so much bad food and drink A LOT like most college students and I follow. They are not fat at all and I guess in my mind I think well if they can do it and stay thin so can I but I have to accept that I'm not like them and have to work a lot harder at this. Blah .. it just sucks because I feel like thats what we do to hang out (not all the time but still) and if I don't join in then I'm lame and I'm so afraid to get dumped on by friends again for not being "cool" enough. Not only that but I do like going out and drinking and going to dinner ... Anyway! I've rambled enough! I hope you're doing well and not feeling as frustrated as me!
P.S. I am going to Sevilla, Spain for my abroad program in the Spring time :) 2191 days ago