Discovering my personal journey to a new healthier and happier me!


It might seem alittle extreme to say this is some epic journey I am starting on. Yet that is how it feels to me. It is me starting along a new path, one that will be often difficult for me to walk but hopefully one that I can find the strength to walk wherever it should lead me. They say it isn’t the destination but the journey. How beautiful and true.

You have this idea of some magical perfect ...

Discovering my personal journey to a new healthier and happier me!


It might seem alittle extreme to say this is some epic journey I am starting on. Yet that is how it feels to me. It is me starting along a new path, one that will be often difficult for me to walk but hopefully one that I can find the strength to walk wherever it should lead me. They say it isn’t the destination but the journey. How beautiful and true.

You have this idea of some magical perfect goal just out of your reach and you long for it so deeply that it hurts. But I know once I climb my mountain and plant my flag at the top it will be amazing and have a beautiful view but it will still be far from perfection. Even if I woke up tomorrow and somehow in my sleep I lost all this weight and was at the weight I dream of it still wouldn't be perfect. I will still stumble and fall on my face sometimes. There will be days when I am still sad or feeling bad. I will still have other goals to reach for etc… Being skinny won't fix everything.

I realized that if I want to be truly happy that I need to stop grasping for some far off reality where I will be happy and instead live in this moment. Work on being happy today and everyday.

I think finally understanding differences from all the other times before where I said I would do something and make changes but never did.

My Journey So Far:

At 26 years years old in Jan 2009 I fell ill and ended up in the ER in extreme pain. My blood sugar (BS) was over 300 & my A1C was 11. They told me I was diabetic. I found a doctor and was put on Metformin and Novolog 70/30 insulin. It was an overwhelming experience that made me really wake up and see how I was killing myself.

I was not active at all. My diet was also a huge mess. I wasn’t really big on junk food or sweets but I ate very unbalanced- skipping meals then binging. I also have a mad addiction to carbs. Ask for a list of my favorite foods and they will be filled with pastas and breads. I love carbs! I would joke that a snack I would choose would be a loaf of bread. And all those carbs got me into big trouble.

But I recognized my problems and wanted to change. Right away I took charge and did amazing. My doctor said I was a perfect patient. I ate right & exercised. By May I was off insulin & my A1C was 5.7. I was eating right and exercising. Lost more then 20lbs and felt great.

Then came the stumble and fall…

So much stuff happened that it is hard to keep track of it all. Going off insulin put a kink in my routine and it rippled out- I began forgetting to take pills, not sticking to my plans. I had two different doctors one handling my diabetes stuff and the other taking care of my PCOS. My diabetic doctor was amazing and I loved her. But she was moving to another city leaving me with having to go to her replacement. It scared me and I ended up not going anymore. My other doctor was horrid. Everytime I went to her she gave me a run around, made me take multiple tests sometimes more then once and gave me zero answers. Everytime I went there I felt more confused, lost and upset treated like she really didn’t have time or any care to help me. I hated it. Not to mention she was over an hour drive away. Which also was an issue, I can’t drive so my husband was having to use his days off to take me everywhere. I was going to a lot of appointments and it was all causing stress. & even with insurance those tests add up to a lot of $$.

I stopped going to the doctors all together. I slowly stopped taking my pills (not that it would have mattered since without going to the doctor I couldn’t get refills. Then I stopped eating right and exercising. I GAINED BACK EVERYTHING I HAD LOST AND THEN SOME.

But I can change…

I am back and trying to get things back on track. I can do this!

Read More About CAELESTIS (Updated August 13)

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