BE-THE-CHANGE   99,067
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Be the change you wish to see in the world. ~ Mahatma Gandhi

I started SparkPeople in earnest on May 29, 2009. I joined in January of that year, but stopped coming after a few weeks. In between those dates, my weight hit a high of at least 433 (my scale at home didn’t go that high – this was at doctor). I started to lose a bit and by the time I really started working here I was down to 403. By January 1, 2010, I was down to 300. In my memory, things went very smoothly but after looking back at old charts and blogs, I realize I was deluding myself. ...
I started SparkPeople in earnest on May 29, 2009. I joined in January of that year, but stopped coming after a few weeks. In between those dates, my weight hit a high of at least 433 (my scale at home didn’t go that high – this was at doctor). I started to lose a bit and by the time I really started working here I was down to 403. By January 1, 2010, I was down to 300. In my memory, things went very smoothly but after looking back at old charts and blogs, I realize I was deluding myself. I had lots of issues with family and work. I had several weeks where I lost “only” a pound and several more with no change at all. But I never had an increase, until one week before my 1-year Spark anniversary.

The week before I had posted: “I keep staring at my pictures on my page and I don't recognize myself. I see/feel parts of my body and they are thinner but I can't wrap my mind around the whole picture. I know my mindset is changing but sometimes I don't know what is really me and what is just what I think I 'should' be.” People were looking to me as a role model and I felt like a fake, a fraud. The next week I had some disappointments at work and I ate my anger and frustration. I gained 6 pounds that week! Over the next 3 weeks, I lost them again plus three more. I hit my low of 253, which was 150 pounds lost in just over a year. But emotional eating took over and I gained 12 pounds in the 2 weeks after that. A week later I was in the hospital having gall bladder surgery.

Things came apart after that. I kept coming to SP, but I wasn’t really blogging about anything of substance. I had lots of “reasons” (read excuses). In the end, they didn’t matter. What did matter is that by mid-October I was back up to 300 and by March 2011 I was at 350. And still I didn’t stop. I’d gain, lose a little, gain back more. At the end of May 2011, I started a new page with a new name. I tried resetting all my trackers (more than once). But I still kept gaining. In August 2012, I was up to 407, which was just past where I started in May 2009. For the past 18 months, I have bounced up and down, between 390 and 410.

I can’t keep doing this to myself. On February 2, 2014 and 396.2 pounds, I reset my trackers for the last time. I just got rid of the comic strip image and put up a real picture. I am going to stop with the “do-overs” and just keep going. Life is never going to settle into a routine. There is no normal. Bad things happen to good people. I can’t let that in my way anymore.

"When we are no longer able to change a situation - we are challenged to change ourselves.” ~ Viktor E. Frankl
Read More About BE-THE-CHANGE (Updated March 26)


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BE-THE-CHANGE Happy birthday to my son, BUCKUNSTOPPABLE!
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Member Since: 5/29/2011

SparkPoints: 99,067

Fitness Minutes: 45,427

My Goals:
I want to be fit and healthy.

My Program:
Track every day and stay in the SP recommended range.

Drink a minimum of 80 ounces of water a day.

Increase my steps to at least 10,000 and set up a strength routine.

Personal Information:
My name is Debbie. I am 56 years old and married for almost 35 years. Although born in Queens, NY, I have adopted Pittsburgh, PA, as my hometown.

Other Information:
“No one can make you feel inferior without your consent.” ~ Eleanor Roosevelt.

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Member Comments:
KRAZYKAT3232
4/16/2014 8:31:59 PM

Winnie the Pooh is the Best!

”A bear, however hard he tries, grows tubby without exercise.”

¯ Winnie the Pooh




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KMICHA
4/16/2014 7:18:52 PM

Just stopping by with some Emerald Love! Keep moving and Keep focused!



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JSAMMONS1981
4/16/2014 3:46:24 PM

week 5 BLC challenge. have a great day!!

Comment edited on: 4/16/2014 3:49:37 PM

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MIZZFIT2
4/16/2014 2:53:34 PM

Spreading a little black panther motivation your way:

"Sometimes you need to step outside, get some air and remind yourself of who you are and who you want to be"

Keep pushing and be who you want to be. emoticon



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DOLLFACEDX
4/16/2014 1:23:21 PM

Once we replace negative thoughts with positive ones, we start having positive results…let's positively ROCK this Spring Challenge !
emoticon

Indigo Dolly



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