This was one of my heavy work-out days: Bruises from Martial Arts, sweat from Bikram.
I will work to make my long limbs ever more elegant!
Just before running the Hot Chocolate 15K in November 2011
Shared Food & Fitness Trackers
This process is to figure out who I am. Part of it is physical: what the hell is under all that adipose tissue? Abs? Cysts? Wings?
But a lot of this is mental/emotional. I got hit pretty hard by a simple line from the New Testament where some Pharisees are trying to snare Jesus with their sticky logic. Jesus just rolls back his shoulders, cocks an eyebrow and says, "You don't know me. You have no idea where I have been or where I am going. But I know exactly who I am, where I have been and I know where I am going."
BTW that was verse John 8:14. I like my Jesus sassy.
So I'm trying to get some sass and character, and here is a poem about that which has helped me through plenty of dark, dank places. I hope it helps you, too:
Hopi Prophesy to the Nation (Thomas Banyacya)
You have been telling the people
That this is the eleventh hour.
Now, you must go and tell the people
That THIS is the hour,
And there are things to be considered.
Where are you living? What are you doing?
What are your relationships?
Are you in the right relationship?
Where is your water?
Know your garden.
It is time to speak your truth.
Create your community,
Be good to each other.
Do not look outside yourself for a leader.
There is a river flowing now very fast.
It is so great and swift
That there are those who will be afraid.
They will try to hold onto the shore.
They will feel they are being pulled apart
And will suffer greatly.
Understand that the river-knows its destination.
The elders say we must let go of the shore,
Push off into the middle of the river,
Keep our eyes open and our heads above water.
And I say: see who is in there with you.
Hold fast to them and celebrate!
At this time in history
We are to take nothing personally,
Least of all, ourselves!
For the moment we do,
Our spiritual growth and journey comes to an end.
The time of the Lone Wolf is over!
Banish the word "struggle" from
Your attitude and vocabulary.
All that we do now must be done
In a sacred manner and in celebration.
We are all about to go on a journey.
We are the ones we have been waiting for.
Stand on more soap boxes. Listen to more angry women. Glorify my body. Run barefoot (ish, c'mon this is the city). Run shirtless. Take a punch and swing right back. Scorpion pose. Figure out what I am feeling and why much faster.
My greatest accomplishment in routine is oatmeal. Even then, I can't really settle into habits easily. My program is always changing, but the basics are: move around, sweat a lot, eat too many vegetables, pretend you are a vegetarian, if you're going to eat pastry make it expensive.
I'm a 25-year old lady living in Ravenswood Chicago (the best neighborhood ever!)
I'm not obese anymore. I'm not even really overweight anymore. This is part-vanity, part-self-discovery.
I'm clever, interesting, beautiful and hopelessly unemployed (and a bit dramatic, I guess.)
Let's see where I go.
My dojo is my self-help group. We have a presence and a spirit that reminds me of AA and proper churches: we're a hospital for the sick, not a museum for the saints.
When I sweat, I usually have to be in a class so I have the benefit of peer pressure. I like my yoga gentle and limber. I like my runs slow. I like my martial arts grimy and earnest.
I belong to CSAs and I am a decent cook, but I am lazy as all get-out. I don't own a car, and it makes me so happy I could cry. I love to drink beer in the shower as a reward. I get nauseated by the smell of fast food.
Secrets of Success
| current weight: 167.0
Thanks for commenting on my blog! I appreciate the comments! This heat has taken a toll on everyone. Let me know how the 10k training goes. YOU CAN DO THIS!
1969 days ago
you are totally right on the surgery/saggy skin thing. I'm not doing this the healthy way bc of lack of money or desire to have nonsaggy skin, but for someone who's only a little overweight (my friend) who is only concerned about appearances and not about being healthy at this point, the reality of elective surgery and what he would look like afterwards is a definite consideration. Not that he would ever actually do it.
My other friend, the one who is actually trying, his dad actually had to get lap band surgery, ironically enough. And he's the one who wants to do it the healthy way! :)
But yes--I'm learning how to 'grab my rawr' more and more :) and it feels good! I'm getting there :) slowly but surely!
1980 days ago
thanks for the advice on running early and on needing to run for 40 mins--I am DEFINITELY a slow runner! Even on the elliptical I average less than 3 miles in half an hour. lol I didn't even think about that! Keep it up, 165 woohoo!!! :)
2017 days ago
I see you were checking out one of my race reports. Thanks for dropping by and I will take a look at the link.
2022 days ago
Thank you for your cheers on my blog today :) I never thought of myself as "ripped" but I'm glad to inspire! Thanks for the add.
2023 days ago