ASILENNA   7,078
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Me at 373 pounds and me at 187 pounds








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New day, New plan

With this being yet another time of promising myself that I am going to stick to it and make this weight loss work, I have come to the realization that the problem is I am trying to force myself to get healthy. I havenít come in to sparkpeople faithfully. I havenít stuck to any healthy eating plan. I then punish myself and am too hard on myself when I mess up. Time to face some facts: 1. I love food., 2. I am an emotional and stress eater., 3. I am always in pain., 4. I have 2 eating disorders: ...
With this being yet another time of promising myself that I am going to stick to it and make this weight loss work, I have come to the realization that the problem is I am trying to force myself to get healthy. I havenít come in to sparkpeople faithfully. I havenít stuck to any healthy eating plan. I then punish myself and am too hard on myself when I mess up. Time to face some facts: 1. I love food., 2. I am an emotional and stress eater., 3. I am always in pain., 4. I have 2 eating disorders: CE and NES (Compulsive Eating and Night Eating Syndrome). For a long time those were my crutch. I think I have now figured it out. I am not perfect. I am a work in progress. I will make mistakes. I will fall off. I will get back on. I will keep learning. I will turn to my family and friends. I will not keep using all the excuses I have in the past.

Why Do I want to lose weight?
1. So I will continue to breathe
2. So I feel better about myself
3. So I look better and not embarassed to go out in public
4. So I can fit into a booth in a restaurant
5. So I can fit into a normal size stall in a public restroom and not have to use the handicapped stall
6. So I can fit in a ride at the amusement park.
7. So my seatbelt will fit.
8. So I can run around and play with my grandsons without feeling like I am going to die
9. So I can be brave enough to wear a bathing suit (proudly) to the beach. (If men happen to do double takes, all the better) and
10. So I can prove to myself and (in small part) to the man who for 4 years told me I will always be fat, never have any kind of success, ďworthless fat piece of sh^$T%#Ē (quote) and Iíd be better off dead.
So, hereís to 2012! A new me, a happy me, a FREE me!!!
Read More About ASILENNA (Updated January 6)




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 Pounds lost: 6.0 
 
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Member Since: 2/29/2008

SparkPoints: 7,078

Fitness Minutes: 6,016

My Goals:
Three month weigh ins, goals, etc for a total of 12 months/.
Goal 1: to lose 38 lbs by Oct. 23, 2012 (252)
Goal 2: to lose
Goal 3: to lose
Goal 4: to lose



My Program:
Three month Exercise prescription
Basic healthy eating
Home cooked meals instead of store bought processed food
Walking 10 miles a week
Yoga
Various videos and dvds (home, on demand, sparkpeople, home circuit training, home Curves training)
Positive outlook
Refined behavior of myself.


Personal Information:
I live in Oregon, looking for employment and going to school. I have 2 grandsons; one who turns 6 in 3 days and one who comes into the world next month. I love to write, cook/bake, draw, read, listen to a large variety of music..

My Community Journal:
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Member Comments:
NIKTORIOUS
5/5/2012 6:43:20 PM

Hope things are going a little better for you! Been thinking about you.



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MICHELELYNN777
5/3/2012 9:00:40 AM

Just checking in with you to see how you're doing. Are you feeling better? Hope you are having a good week! I'm here for you if you need some encouragement or support.
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TOSTAYHEALTHY
4/23/2012 8:45:40 PM

Following up with you....sorry it took so long. Yes, let's be SP friends!

Sandy :)



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NIKTORIOUS
4/16/2012 11:27:51 PM

congrats on your progress! emoticon



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DRAKON9
4/16/2012 10:51:33 PM

Hi! I hope your headache is gone. Sorry that I have not responded for a while. I have been out of town for several days.



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