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Today is the first day of the rest of your life!
Life is still so good ... my name may have changed but not my attitude! I believe it's all good no matter what's thrown my way. At any given moment, YOU have the POWER to say 'This is NOT how the story is going to end' .... we always have the power to change! My name is Patricia and I'm a cancer survivor ... no, I'm a cancer thriver. I like that better! Two and a half years ago my life changed in an instant. I was diagnosed with stage 3 Non ...
Life is still so good ... my name may have changed but not my attitude! I believe it's all good no matter what's thrown my way. At any given moment, YOU have the POWER to say 'This is NOT how the story is going to end' .... we always have the power to change! My name is Patricia and I'm a cancer survivor ... no, I'm a cancer thriver. I like that better! Two and a half years ago my life changed in an instant. I was diagnosed with stage 3 Non Hodgkin Lymphoma (NHL) ... yikes! A little history ... we were planting my first garden (the one with the wall) in our new house. We had just moved to Chicago a year earlier. I got a backache that would not go away. I thought it was because I was becoming more out of shape (I was!) and I pledged to myself to take start exercising ... as soon as I got the time (someday). We planted over 50 bushes and 300+ perennials ... after spending a good 6 months in the house hibernating over the winter. If that's not a back breaker .... Oh yeah, and I smoked like a little chimney. (I quit smoking 12/09/2008.) I was a typical type A personality. I was over-worked, over-stressed and had a to-do list a mile long. Chaos was a way of life. I wanted to change but didn't really know how to and truthfully I didn't really try to change ... it was all about 'someday'. After I finish THIS project, I'll slow dowm ... yeah, right. I was successful and proud of the fact that I was so 'needed' at work. Proud that I required so little sleep while you mere mortals struggled to keep up with me. Proud and arrogant ... yuk ... but you know, that's how I would describe what I was like. I lived on coffee, cigarettes, junk food and restaurant meals. How could this happen to me? Cancer. I was too important. I take care of things. I don't get sick. And then my life changed. Thank God for that thump on the head (or spine, in my case) ... While cancer sucked, it gave me a life with meaning. Once someone says you have cancer, your life will never be the same again, and that's not always such a bad thing. My treatment was hard, very hard. The lymph nodes in my abdomen were crushing my spine. The pain was excrutiating. At one point pain pills offered little relief. Chemo was hard on me. I ended up in the hospital sick from infections. I could barely walk or sit up. I wasted away. You'd be surprised at how quickly muscle can waste away and how slow it is to come back. It seemed like, in an instant, my life as I knew it was over. And yet .... I found ME. I had time to think. Just what did I want out of life? I had time for God ... time to talk ... time to pray ... time to listen ... time to just BE. I was so weak. I needed a nap after taking a shower ... honest to God. I'm not sure how to say this but it was also one of the best times in my life because of all the time I had to think, pray, and contemplate. I was happy and it was genuine. 'Someday' had finally arrived. I'm so grateful that I got another chance. I could have died living my life as I always had ... waiting for someday. But I didn't. God threw me a rope and I took it. I learned so much during that time. I was just an observer. Too weak to participate. Truly another blessing because I think I needed time for all that I was learning to fully sink in and become a part of who I am. If I had been stronger I just may have put if off to think about 'someday'. Life really is FUNNY. Laugh as much as you can! Laughter made my chemo bearable. I was there for 6 1/2 hours each time I had chemo so I learned to joke with everyone. It got me through it. Kindness is all that really matters. Before I always had the need to be right. Never give up on hope. Sometimes it's all you got. In an instant I was 'cured' of the desire to be a work-a-holic. Work lost it's meaning. I was free. After 6 months I was in remission. Yeah for chemo! I began re-building my body, which incidently felt like it had been run over by a truck. Chemo is harsh! And the scar tissue on my spine was ... well let's just say I never got my back to the way it was before ... but I'm still here. :) It took about a year to build strength and endurance. I'm still striving to get better ... it's a long, slow process. But I'm ok. I don't plan on ever giving up. I mountain bike with my husband and walk (for my alone time). I eat right. I always knew how to, I just didn't. I grew up with a father who was sort of a health nut so I don't know how I ended up so over-indulged in the food department. I take the time to be silent and contemplate. It calms my soul and I gotta say it's the number one change in my lifestyle that I have made. It helps so much when I get frustrated with myself or other. I still have a type A personality ... lol I keep trying new things. I fail a whole lot ... guess it keeps me humble ... and it gives me and God a good laugh. But when I fail I always get up and try again. I'm lucky to be alive. If I had this cancer 15 years ago the outcome would have been very different. The thing about cancer is that you never really know if it's over (at least not for many years after the fact). Every small pain becomes a 'what if it's back?'. The only way I see to get over that fear is to take care of my body and leave the rest in God's hands. How many people get a second chance? Actually, we all do ... everyday. Today might be the day you decide to change how your story ends. Today might be the day that you decide to live your best life now. Today, I'm grateful for all that I have been through ... even the dreaded cancer. I don't know how my story will end but I do know that I had a re-birth on that day when I was diagnosed and there is no going back. It's all temporary. I finally GET that! Since we do not have all the time in the world, we must choose. We don't get to do it all ... we don't get to have it all ... our time and resources are limited ... but we can decide what essentially is important to us, dream, and then go for it! I'm writing some new chapters to my story. It all begins right here, right now. I'm done with 'someday'! Today is all I've got! Here's to today! My best day ever!
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Member Since: 12/1/2010
SparkPoints: 18,399
Fitness Minutes: 25,680
My Goals:
I may not get to choose what I'm dealt with in life (then again maybe I have more influence than I let on to) ... BUT ... I can always choose my attitude ... and that is what influences how happy I'm gonna be. To live life on my terms ... not really ... maybe just live ... lol To stay as healthy and fit as I possibly can for as long as I can. To keep a sense of humor because I can take that with me. To grow some hair! It's a work in progress .. lol ... DONE
My Program:
Meditate Laugh Breathe Walk Cycle Work out (ST) 3 to 4 times per week Drink 8 glasses water a day Choose to eat what is good for me Write Measure success by the quaity of my life Say please and thank you ... often :) Remember what I am grateful for Keep a garden .... and keep it organic ... I'll get more butterflies and hummingbirds ... or at least I won't be a party to their demise :) Feed the birds ... they need the food more than I do :) Pay it forward
Other Information:
I live just outside of Chicago and I love it here ... I love the seasons, maybe because I grew up in Southern California and rarely saw snow. My favorite place on earth is Florence, my DH's is Rome ... we both love travel and do it every chance we can!
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