Archimedes offers some great advice. This is exactly what I did, quite a while before actually embarking on my weight loss efforts. I'd been feeling so ugly and horrible that I'd just stopped taking care of my appearance, i didn't try to dress nicely or wear makeup or keep my hair trimmed stylishly ("why bother when i'm so fat and ugly"). Eventually I was just so tired of feeling so low and looking so frumpy, I decided to "make the best of it" and figured, even if i am fat, at least I could dress myself appropriately. I went out and bought a few decent pieces of clothing for work. Even got a couple skirts. Even snagged a couple of accessory items, a chunky necklace, a bright scarf. Started putting on makeup. Changed my hair style. Not all at once... this happened over a few weeks/months, and slowly-slowly-slowly this kinder-gentler treatment of myself started to pay off. Taking-care-of-my-appearance did help me to feel better about 'me." And after I started feeling better about me, I went from feeling resigned to my size, and started feeling a little hopeful, optimistic, that maybe i could do something about THAT, too.
And so now I am. My kind-treatment of myself is now extending into my food zone, and the scales are starting to show it.
One day I might even be ready to treat myself to the benefits of regular exercise.
But first things first. You have to start with where you are, and take care of that person.
I agree with Slim...a list of positives gives a person a nice visual of him/herself everyday. Make a list and put it on the bathroom mirror, work desk, refrigerator, dashboard, and everywhere. Happiness and self worth is entirely up to each person to maintain. It might be tough in some situations but still, it is something nothing can take away of we don't let it. A dent does not mean self worth is destroyed..it's broken in and more experienced IMHO. It took me a long time to really accept that I am on charge of my happiness and worth and that it's up to me to be the guardian of my greatest assets. So, have a you year and celebrate...YOU!
Good luck and hang in there.
Fitness Minutes: (285,013)
3/13/13 12:14 P
Raising self esteem isn't easy. Most of us struggle with self esteem issues in one way or another. We all have those little negative voices in our heads telling us we could have gotten an A if we tried a bit harder. We could have lost 5 pounds if we didn't eat so much junk. Why is my sister so much prettier than me ? Well, you don't have to listen to those negative voices. In fact, stop listening to the negative voices and start saying some positive things about yourself. accentuate the positive and start eliminating the negative.
Here's something simple you can do to help feel better about yourself. Are you wearing the same old drab clothing ? if so, it's time for some snazzy new clothes. get your best friends, the ones with good taste in clothes, and go out shopping. Let them select clothes that flatter your figure now. don't buy something in a smaller size telling yourself you'll lose weight later. Don't do that. Buy something snazzy that fits you now. If you don't like the size number, cut the tag off. those numbers are meaningless anyway.
Nothing says new attitude than a flattering outfit. Dress for success ! Honestly, if you wear drab frumpy clothing, you're going to feel like a drab frump. change your attitude by making simple changes like buying some new clothes. How about a new hair style ? You want to start feeling better about yourself ? Then it's time to update your hair. get it cut and styled. get your nails done too.
Also, if you really are getting down on yourself, you have to consider whether or not you may be suffering from some depression. When is the last time you had a full physical ? If you haven't been in a long time, get one done. Talk to your doctor to see if maybe you have some mild depression.
It would be helpful if you made an appointment with your Dr and tell him/her how you feel. Ask for a referral to a Therapist who will be able to help you find the cause and deal with it, and as a result find a solution.
In the meantime, I would suggest you make a list of all the positives about you - things that you like. It might be:
I am kind to people I am a good worker I am good with animals I am good with crafts I am .....
If you have a problem finding more than a couple, then ask some of your friends and family and write them down. Then cut them into strips and place them in a jar. Every morning take a couple out, stand in front of the mirror and read them out loud to yourself. And RE-read them until you believe them!!!
You ARE good enough!!!!! You are beautiful in your picture!!!! Sometimes life throws us the hardballs and we have to stand strong....Practice saying positive things/mantras to yourself every day...Keep a journal of all the things you are grateful for in your life..and your accomplishments....I, too, have issues with self esteem due to parental neglect...Another thing that helps is going to your local library and reading self esteem books...I got some great ideas there....I also joined a gym and do Zumba classes....It really helps! Keep sparking, keep reading and trying, and DON'T give up!!!!! You are special, unique, and have a great life ahead of you!
3/12/13 11:47 P
i have low self esteem and dont know how to feel better about myself. i feel like im not good enough for anything and the best i can do in all parts of my life just isnt good enough. im not sure how to change that...
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