parents death

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3/3/12 11:50 A

In the past ten years I have lost two brothers to cancer, my parents to slow old age, and my SIL who was my age to ovarian cancer. I had to be the executor of the will and sell a broken old house. Stress and tears, when I'd get up, I'd get knocked back down. Yes, I was depressed, although I never went on medication. Just took ages to come out of it.

Part of kicking it was forcing myself out of the house, forcing myself to be active. As for food, I simply keep my weaknesses out of the house. Don't use your family as an excuse to have unhealthy stuff at hand. It isn't good for them either. If they must have snacks and treats on hand, lock them up. Might work for you, might not.

Posts: 9,357
3/2/12 2:57 P

I lost my mother in 2007 and my father exactly 15 months later. I am in my fifties, but my parents were in their 90s...it makes no difference....I felt like a little orphaned girl at the time and still do at times. My bestfriend passed away from breast cancer 1 week before my dad..I went to 3 funerals in 10 days.....In fact I attended 16 funerals in 15 months..I did the same as you... I cooked comfort food and ate it.I over came and started walking and cooking/eating healthier...I think you just need to give yourself time and let yourself grieve.

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2/26/12 11:46 A

Give yourself time to grieve. I think you DO show signs of depression; having those "bad days" and overeating, the loss of motivation... you may very well be depressed. Depression is not just about sitting in your house crying all the time. While I was depressed, my primary symptoms were lack of motivation and rage. Uncontrollable, unpredictable rage. I never cried, I never laid in bed.

Try and talk to your doctor about it; while you're on an antidepressant, it may not be enough, and you may need additional therapy, a support group might help, too.

It's tough, and I'm sorry, While I'm younger than you, I did lose my father at a young age, so I know a bit about recovering from grief. What was important for me was activity. I had to get out of the house, and DO THINGS. I was 15 and cute at the time, so exercise wasn't even in my brain, but I did get out with friends, and tried to be busy.

Maybe doing things might help. When you feel the urge to hit the fridge go out for some fresh air. Get a good walk, air in your lungs, sun on your face. TRy to reprogram your stress response to something healthier. It's hard for me, because I'm an emotional eater too, but I"m getting there!

Here's a couple of articles here on sparkpeople about binge eating that may help you:

10 Ways to Stop Binge Eating in Its Tracks
www.sparkpeople.com/resource/nutrition_art
icles.asp?id=1703

Stop Emotional Eating Before It Starts
www.sparkpeople.com/resource/wellness_arti
cles.asp?id=1396

This Sparkpeople member turned to running after her mother died:
www.sparkpeople.com/resource/fitness_artic
les.asp?id=1574

Posts: 2
2/24/12 12:17 P

Im just looking for some feedback. some motivation. something. within the last year I lost both of my parents. 5 months apart. Neither death was sudden. Both were long illnesses where I spent long hours in ICU's (I would never change how much time I spent with both. I don't regret a second of being with them) I also work and am a mother. My husband is fantastic and very supportive. After their deaths I obviously hit a very low point, lost motivation and binged eat. I would intermitantly exercise. ( I have always been an avid exerciser) But I am an emotional eater. I continue to closet eat and binge on all types of sugary snacks. I mean BINGE. I have obviously put on weight 11 lbs. Most of my friends and my husband all keep telling me I look fine, But I know my behavior is unhealthy. I am trying to stop but keep losing my motivation especially if I have a bad day. I don't show any signs of being depressed and Yes I 'm on an antidepressant. But any suggestions on how to regroup. any suggestions on books,somthing that worked for them. someone who may have been through something similar. I am 40 and no one of my age group has lived this so they don't understand. Thank you!