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LOUNMOUN Posts: 1,273
1/11/13 8:22 P

I'm not really in the same situation but I kind of am. I have friends and acquaintances but they are not really going through the same things so they don't exactly get it.

I have found people online who might understand my situation better through message boards or blogs when I didn't find that IRL groups. I'm not saying to abandon the IRL groups you are with now but expand in different directions socially either online or IRL.

It is possible that some of what you are feeling is because your father passed away. When my mom died I felt like I couldn't keep telling friends or family that I was sad and thinking of her all the time. I felt kind of outside of things and lonely even in a group of people. It took a really long time to feel normal socially again.

MISSHEATHER77 SparkPoints: (10,002)
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Posts: 88
1/9/13 4:12 P

I am sorry you are feeling lonely. I would suggest that you are dealing with more than just fitting into a group. As you get older, there is not going to be just one group to fit into. You are individual, so you should celebrate that. If you feel lost, maybe you should speak to a professional to deal with these feelings. It's really not clear why you think you bother people.

SARAHMO4 SparkPoints: (1,297)
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1/6/13 7:54 P

I am here because I am trying to figure out how to lose weight and not get discouraged or deal with the akward stage I am in. The guy and girl friends I have are in college, and are either living in dorms and between the ages 19 and 24 or their married or have kids and in college too. In some ways, its easy to feel like I am alone in my situation, though I am happy about not being in dorms or stil being their age, I am 26, slightly older.

The other group is where I started a womens study with primarily older women or ones past college. Most are late 20s to 60's and are like me. Single no kids, or they have done a version of married or having kids such as divorces or life changes.

I love both these groups, but not being entirely in either group is really taking a toll on me sometimes. I love the people, but when they havent been at the stage I am or are past it, its hard to form friendships and underdstand what a person is going through, so talking to them can be difficult.

The result seems to be lonelines or just hoping to get into one group entirely by graduating or dating someone again and gettign married and having kids I have people to talk to but some are busy or i dont know their schedule, or I feel like I am bothering them.

I would talk to my mom more but i dont want to overwhelm her. My dad, who she was married to, passed away after a 3 and 1/2 month battle with cancer. I dont like adding to her stress, or upsetting her because hes gone.

I just dont know what to do, my sister is typically busy and my mom i dont need to stress out or upset and friends are there, but i dont like bothering them. Any advice on how to deal with loneliness and this stage I am in would be appreciated.

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