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how do you comfort yourself without food?



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MARTELLA3
SparkPoints: (18,196)
Fitness Minutes: (25,112)
Posts: 116
8/23/10 6:18 P

http://sootheyourselfwithoutfood.com/

This was an Amazon recommnedation for me. I haven't read it.

Also www.eatingmindfully.com


Edited by: MARTELLA3 at: 8/23/2010 (18:21)


KATRINAMOMMA3
Posts: 247
8/23/10 4:57 P

write about your feelings,dance,take a walk



KOSHIE1
SparkPoints: (101,949)
Fitness Minutes: (37,670)
Posts: 6,427
8/23/10 3:29 P

It's Monday!

Time to tell me how you are doing!



MOM2KATNISS
Posts: 297
8/11/10 8:25 P

Astres: thank you! your feedback IS helpful. I agree re: journaling my feelings. It helps a lot to articulate it and sometimes i discover another layer to my emotions that I hadn't been aware of.

Koshie: Yeah!! The fleeing from donuts was super super hard. Coupled with my 5 year oldís begging me to get them, I steeled myself and said no! My goal is 10 more lbs down by my birthday on Nov 12. I think itís doable and as I said, I wrote it down 20 times and it flashed across my brain at the store! I LOVE your idea; itís a physical reminder and itís awesome. Iím gonna do it! Thanks!
Keeping my hands busy:
* writing words on index cards for my little one. Just focusing on this and writing it out neatly was good for me. It calmed me down and my craving went away. Maybe others can try this (and maybe I will, too) with positive words that are meaningful to them
* balling a skein of yarn. This requires a lot of patience and concentration.
How about you?
I WILL update you next week for sure. Itís so helpful to have an accountability buddy. You rock!

FitMom4Life: you know, I thought of your advice to exercise to exhaustion the other day when I was having a panic attack and trying to avoid going to the gym. I just went on automatic, went to the gym, worked my butt off and felt fantastic afterwards, so thanks!!!

Singer73: youíre right. I really have been viewing myself as a victim and just believing that I have no control over my circumstances. I was so wrong. I really do have power over things. Today I was tempted to get a jar of vanilla frosting and empty it in one sitting in front of the tv. It was a strong feeling, I couldnít stop thinking about it. I decided to just sit in it. Not in the frosting. In my discomfort. Just sit in it and let it pass. I also did 20 pushups and it DID go away. Hope that works next time!! Thanks for your encouragement. (p.s. your babyís cute!)

Everyone: your ideas are fantastic; thank you for them. Iím thinking of getting a massage next week. This will be very comforting, too.








ASTRES
SparkPoints: (3,421)
Fitness Minutes: (1,706)
Posts: 151
8/11/10 4:47 P

I find I feel a lot better when I journal out my feelings. It also keeps me from snapping at people. Just take a few minutes and write.

Also, sometimes replacing the habit with walking? But I find I stew a lot more on my walks sometimes and it doesn't calm down until I actually write it out longhand.

I hope that helps.



KOSHIE1
SparkPoints: (101,949)
Fitness Minutes: (37,670)
Posts: 6,427
8/11/10 4:31 P

Running away from donuts IS an accomplishment! Clearly, you are stronger than you think!

I'm glad you are exercising some self-control; sometimes, it is a battle WON when you merely not lose too terribly!

How about writing in indelible ink that next goal in fine print on a wide rubber band? Wear it on your wrist and snap it during times of temptation!

In this thread, you said you liked the idea of keeping your hands busy. Besides journaling, how are you doing this? ...that is, comforting yourself WITHOUT food?

I expect an update next week!

Edited by: KOSHIE1 at: 8/11/2010 (16:33)


MOM2KATNISS
Posts: 297
8/10/10 7:10 P

Koshie,

thanks for keeping me honest!!

I'm so glad you asked.

OK, here's what's been happening,

I have been feeling big-time anxiety BUT though I have been eating foods that I normally have been avoiding, I have been eating when I'm hungry and stopping when I'm full.

It's made it easier for me to deal with the stress. If I deny myself those foods, I end up eating them out of control.

So, here's what I've been doing:
* I allow myself to have those "treat" foods, as I said above, in moderation
* I have been incredibly tempted to eat through a half-dozen donuts, etc., but I'm just literally running away from it. THAT is something I'm esp proud of myself about. Wasn't easy.
* I'm still exercising
* Surrounding myself with good friends
* Journaling like mad
* Making my next weight loss goal and writing it TWENTY times! There's something to writing down a goal or a dream several times. Seeing it on paper makes it seem more possible.

I definitely do not feel "in line," or on program, but I don't feel out of control, either.

THANKS again for helping me be accountable.



FITMOM4LIFE
Posts: 168
8/10/10 11:55 A

Go to the gym and work yourself to exhaustion! It feels great!!



KOSHIE1
SparkPoints: (101,949)
Fitness Minutes: (37,670)
Posts: 6,427
8/10/10 11:46 A

SO, you TURKEY!

Are you staying on track?
Are you making USE of any of the advice you asked for?

Edited by: KOSHIE1 at: 8/10/2010 (11:47)


REDHOTRS
Posts: 238
8/2/10 1:03 P

I do something special for myself, like buy a new outfit or a new color nail polish and give myself a pedicure. On the rare occasion I have a few extra bucks, I'll splurge and get a massage or a facial.



REBECCAANN08
Posts: 173
8/2/10 9:53 A

Ironically, I've found that cooking can keep me from eating. When I get stressed, I make a loaf of homemade bread or a batch of brownies from complete scratch (trust me, all the kneading can make bread making a workout on its own). By the time the food is done, I'm usually over whatever made me emotional and I have a thing where I like to have a slice of whatever I made, but I like giving the food to friends and family even more. Usually, I'll make a batch of reasonably healthy brownies or cookies, keep a a couple servings for myself and bring the rest to work.

Don't know if that helps at all but it's something I do.

Edited by: REBECCAANN08 at: 8/2/2010 (09:56)


MOM2KATNISS
Posts: 297
8/2/10 9:04 A

thanks for these great ideas. I hadn't thought of these, esp keeping my hands busy.

you totally hit on it; i experience like a jitterniness with my hands and it usually ends with me in a bag of something I shouldn't be eating.

OK, promise, I will check in with each of you three weeks from today to give you a positive, empowering report on 8/22 (I'm going away on 8/23, so I'll do it the day before!).

I'm so thankful for each of you and your support. Stay healthy and happy!!





LACEYISTAKEN
Posts: 761
8/1/10 8:57 P

Sorry this is in 2 posts, on my phone and couldn't seem to figure out how to see more texts.
- It may sound silly, but getting a hair cut does wonders for me. It distracts me from a LOT of things. Having a new or updated look can give you confidence to conquer a lot of situations you thought might be socially or personally challenging. If you're not ready to 'go under the knife' maybe you could commit to some fire engine red nail polish..?
-also turn to the love and needs of your animals. Does your dog need a good belly rub, does your cat need to hear your frustrations, and then maybe clip their nails, give them a bath, etc.



LACEYISTAKEN
Posts: 761
8/1/10 8:49 P

Here's to wishing you high volumes of luck in conquering whatever challenges come your way the next few weeks. I have a couple more suggestions for 'replacements' to the comfort of food.
- Hit the road for a good strong walk (or run if that's your thing) every time you get that deep, sinking feeling. Put your chest up high and either enjoy nature or fix your eyes on points in front of you and speed through it.
- Find a new hobby that can be done idley and involves your hands over the next few weeks. If you're crocheting or Mod Podging while you watch TV, it's really hard to put your hands in a bag of chips or o unwrap candy bars.


Edited by: LACEYISTAKEN at: 8/1/2010 (20:50)


LEANIESME
SparkPoints: (0)
Fitness Minutes: (3,999)
Posts: 310
8/1/10 8:46 P

I love to buy a book..or go to the library..good treat!! Plus, exercise..I love triking.

Edited by: LEANIESME at: 8/1/2010 (20:47)


KOSHIE1
SparkPoints: (101,949)
Fitness Minutes: (37,670)
Posts: 6,427
8/1/10 8:29 P

Here's hoping, make that EXPECTING to hear back from you!



MOM2KATNISS
Posts: 297
8/1/10 8:26 P

OMIGOSH, you guys are AMAZING. Thank you for the ideas, encouragement, and good, firm words!!

I soooo need it.

Can I check back with you in 3 weeks and let you know how I did? It would be good for me to know I have to check in with you and HONESTLY report back to you.

Thanks!!



KOSHIE1
SparkPoints: (101,949)
Fitness Minutes: (37,670)
Posts: 6,427
8/1/10 4:56 P

Part of the problem is the dread that you are experiencing right NOW and for the next 3 weeks. Do you have a POWER food? Something that fits your diet that you enjoy eating? If not, pick something. It could be celery for the FIERCE crunch and chew it offers (take THAT, you!), or a comforting softness of cheese...
Whatever your POWER food is, it should be portable so that you can take it to this event coming up.

Now imagine yourself as Stupendous Woman, armed with your POWER food. Further imagine the stress of this event. Eat your food. Overcome the stress in your mind with your imagination. Repeat daily. You have 3 weeks to create a POWERful connection to the idea of you overcoming the problems, to your POWER food, and you as a powerful person.

Later, when Stupendous Woman is firmly rooted in your head and heart, you can arm her with a different tool other than food, as suggested in others' comments... But right now, you HAVE a coping mechanism in place. You just need to modify it in the short term so you can stay in control and not gain weight.



BLACKSHEEPWINGS
Posts: 3,958
8/1/10 4:23 P

I'm also an emotional eater. I'll share a few ideas to cope with emotions instead of eating. Take whichever suits your preferences and schedule:

. Vent in a journal (destroy if afterward, if you want)
. Take a luxurious bath (with bubbles or full-fat milk)
. Walk (slow to meditate or brisk to vent frustrations)
. Play a bit (i.e. swings if you're near a park)
. Dance/sing to favorite tunes (i.e. I Will Survive)



AGAINSTTHEWIND
Posts: 195
8/1/10 4:06 P

I'm a cryer... I'll admit that. I used to cry AND eat at the same time, but now I'm able to seperate out the tears from the desire for food-- the key for me is recognizing that food will not stop the tears. Hugs from a supportive person help, I'm also big on going for a walk or playing with my Wii to get out some of the negative energy. Talking to supportive people in my life helps too, but I can't let myself "dwell" on the negative- get it out, come up with a solution, or accept that there isnt one, and let it go. I know it sounds like I think its really easy, but I know its not.




CONTRARYWISE
Posts: 4
8/1/10 3:57 P

Sometimes when I get a craving to eat and I know I am not really hungry I get up and do some exercise instead---it makes me feel better and helps me lose some weight at the same time.

But the most useful way to deal with the emotional urge to eat is to get into the emotions which are the basis of the urge. In a safe place, imagine a trusted person to tell your feelings to. Let out the sadness.



SINGER73
Posts: 5,205
8/1/10 3:14 P

First I want to congratulate you on being aware that you emotional eat and that you know this upcoming event is a trigger for you. That means that you can come up with a plan and that will make things a whole lot easier.

One thing that you can do is not attend the upcoming event. If that's not possible, then try to surround yourself with positive people during this event. If there is one negative person or the person who triggers these feelings in you, limit your contact with them.

Know that you are a different person. You have become this healthier, stronger person and don't let anyone take that away from you. Purpose in your mind the next 3 weeks will be a victory for you. Your old behavior is not even an option.

Let this be your redefining moment.

Hey, I'm getting excited for you because I know that you can make it out on the other side of this event as a Victor NOT a Victim.



MOM2KATNISS
Posts: 297
8/1/10 2:50 P

Hi,

I've been consciously taking care of my health since December 15, 2009.
It's been going really slow...and that's how I want it.
I have lost 25 pounds.

My main obstacle has been emotional eating. Lifelong, I have turned to food for comfort, to soothe me when I'm upset, and really for any and every emotion.

Here's where I am currently. The next three weeks can be my victory or me dancing to the same old tune. I have a high-stress event (that I'd rather not go into right now; spare everyone!) coming up over the next three weeks.

Part of me wants to just give in and let food have its normal place in my life and then deal with the messy clean up afterwards.

The part of me that's so happy and proud of me for my weight loss and for the changes I'm seeing in myself (physically and non-physically) is getting FIERCE!! And saying to me, "THIS IS IT. You can react as usual, stuffing food in your mouth...or redefine yourself."

I want this time to be different.

My question for you: what can I do when I am hit with incredibly debilitating, powerful emotions? How can I get through it without turning to food?

Please share if you've been through this.

Thanks!!

Edited by: MOM2KATNISS at: 8/1/2010 (20:27)


 
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