is your mom involved enough in your schooling that she would notice if you called your appointments a psych class? perhaps even just say you're auditing one so she'd know why it wasn't showing up on your transcript. once you're there you can deal with how to deal with your mom. but if a white lie like that gets you where you need to be, i say take it. relationships with moms can be really strained and it sounds like you could use some more tools in your belt when dealing with your mom, which good therapy can help you deal with. and you need to start thinking about food as fuel for your body. if you have a full tank of gas in your car, do you try and put in another 5 gallons? no, but that's what you're doing when you eat because you want something rather than when you're hungry. now if you're emotionally eating that's a different story. if you eat everything on your plate regardless, use a smaller plate. dessert plates can be great to eat off of. and the best part is that if you are still hungry after eating less food, you can go back and get more. if a smaller plate isn't going to fly at family dinners, start by serving yourself less food. try to aim for about half of what you would usually serve yourself. so if you would get a cup of rice and a cup of vegetables, aim for a half cup of rice and a half cup of veg on that plate. if you still are hungry and want more, go back for seconds and get 1/4 cup of rice and 1/4 cup of vegetables. and if you're still hungry, you can go back for another 1/4 cup of rice and 1/4 cup of vegetables. spacing your food out like that will help give your full cue to reach your brain. it takes about 20 minutes from the time your stomach is full for that info to reach your brain. play around with a hunger satiety scale like this one. www.mckinley.illinois.edu/Interactive/olwm class/hunger_satiety_scale.pdf when you're trying to figure out how you feel. teaching yourself that hunger isn't a light switch [on or off] and that not stuffed isn't the same thing as hungry can be difficult, but useful. so many people associate hungry with not being stuffed that recognizing that there is a middle ground can help you become one of those people that stop in the middle of the meal when they no longer need more food. when you journal your food, do you include the time, how you're feeling [happy, sad, mad, bored, etc], what and how much you eat, when you get hungry again and how you feel then? because besides really helping with emotional eating if that's your issue journaling can help you identify the foods that don't fill up.not all foods are created equal and not all foods fill you up the same way. and knowing which foods aren't keeping you for any amount of time and avoiding them can be a great help. in other words, it can be a little harder to go back for that fourth snack if the first one filled you up. it can be quite easy to go back for a fourth snack if your snack doesn't fill you up. my big aha moment on this one came when i wanted pringles when i got home from work one day. so i had a serving, which is about 200 cals. this didn't fill me up in the least, so i had another and when that didn't fill me up either it occurred to me that i should be trying something else that might keep me a little fuller. so i had 100 cals of shrimp stir fry and that was good and filled and kept me. the next time i was grabbing for pringles when i was hungry i diverted to the 100 cals of shrimp stir fry, which again filled and kept me, thus saving myself from 400 cals of pringles that wasn't doing anything for me. if you have the data like that from a food journal you can start to pinpoint what foods leave you wanting more right away and not eat those foods in favor of the foods that actually keep you til your next meal or snack.
Obviously, you know your Mum and we don't, but perhaps if you just sit down with her, and tell her that you feel you have a problem with food, and you would like to get some help for it before it escalates too far out of hand.
If she asks for more information you might like to tell her that it is becoming an addiction in that you HAVE to eat whatever is around even when you aren't hungry, and even with foods that you aren't particularly keen on.
You don't indicate what your weight is, but you could also mention that you are gaining weight again, and altho' you don't want to be a Skinny Minnie, you don't want to be burdened later in life with ill health because of out-of-control eating.
Are you in college? If so, you might be able to get some help via their services.
I hope that is works out o.k. for you.
Good luck, and take care, Kris
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2 2/3/14 3:00 A
Thank you so much for your suggestions guys. I actually have been eating off smaller plates but i will try some of your other ideas :)
I've toyed with the idea of a therapist for a while but i just cant seem tp figure out how to tell my mom, because i still live at home. I will work on that though. Again, thanks so much!
I agree with those who suggested thinking about working with a therapist. However, if you can't, won't, or just don't think you need it, there are some things you can do yourself.
First, try to separate yourself from food. If you can't get the snacks out of the house, get yourself out of the house, or at least out of the part of the house where the food is. Stay outside walking or riding a bicycle or something until it's dark. Set up an area for yourself in the house where you read or do some sort of hobby and where food is not allowed, and spend the evenings there. (Consider putting new carpet in that room or making a handmade rug for it, or storing craft supplies there, so there's a logical reason not to let anyone bring in food or drink.) Consider taking night school classes so you're not home around food. If evening snacking is a problem, after dinner mop the kitchen floor with lots of water so it will take a long time to dry. You'll train yourself to stay out of the kitchen AND you'll have an extra tidy house.
Second, find something else to do. Most people who eat when they're not hungry are doing it because they're bored. Again, come up with a hobby or take classes so you have something else to do to take your mind off eating. (If you don't want to go back to an academic setting, there are all sorts of hobby classes. I knew a college professor who took an upholstery class at the community college because she had a worn-out chair she didn't want to throw away, and she was so good at it that she went into business and made more money part-time at that than she was making in her full-time career!) Whatever it takes, find something fun to do besides watching TV when you're not at work.
As for not being able to stop when there's something on your plate... Plan your menus the day before, and serve yourself the exact amount you planned. Don't put extra food on your plate, and then you won't have to worry about leaving some. In restaurants, ask the waiter to bring a box when s/he brings your order, and immediately box up half of it to take home for the next day. You might also start rewarding yourself for leaving something-- say for every time you leave at least an ounce of food, you put a quarter in a jar to save for some impractical little thing you've been wanting but you think is too frivolous to just go buy. Set yourself up to have a positive, cheerful thing associated with leaving something on your plate.
Do you feel that a great deal of the time you are turning to food for other reasons besides satisfying your hunger? (some of the things in your posts sounded as if this might be happening a great deal of the time)
Perhaps working with a therapist who has training with these type of eating issues could be of help to you. WDYT??? Becky Your SP Registered Dietitian
Fitness Minutes: (3,742)
2/2/14 6:50 P
I find that my body can't seem to tell the difference between hungry and thirsty so drinking plenty of water even if I think I don't need it helps with overeating. Also keeping myself busy and away from the kitchen helps when I want to eat out of boredom and getting up from the table and brushing my teeth immediately after each meal helps me tell myself the meal is over no going back for seconds.
Have you looked at the composition of your meals - particularly your breakfast and lunch? Often they nutrient deficient, therefore don't fill you up enough to last a while. Ensure that your breakfast is a very healthy and filling one. A lot of people find plenty of protein for breakfast works best. I find that breakfast is my heavier carb meal, and lighter on protein, BUT the carb is Rolled Oats which for me is very filling. Sometimes I sweeten it with dates. I always have a piece of fruit with it, too.
If you are finding it very hard to control your urges, you may well benefit from being referred to a Therapist who specializes in food issues. Your Dr can do this.
The other thing that your Dr can do is to check to see if there is something medical going on. Thyroid issues and PCOS as well as other issues can contribute to it.
Good luck, Kris
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2 2/2/14 5:56 P
hi everyone i find that once i start eating, i often find it hard to stop. i know i am not the only one with this problem. last year, i lost about 10 kg by changing my lifestyle and trying to eat healthy foods, exercising a lot, and so on. i was surprised that i had actually succeeded after having tried for a while. however, this weight loss occurred while i was on exchange, and so when i came home i gradually began to give up my good eating habits. i still try and go for the healthy option but we do have lots of sweets and unhealthy foods in my house. I started regaining weight. I noticed i would start eating and serve myself enormous portions and then go back for more. these days i am trying very hard again, but the same thing keeps happening. i find afternoons the worst because i tell myself i'm allowed to eat a healthy snack - and then i'm suddenly on my fourth. i've made use of google a lot and also usually come up with the same thing: food journal, ask yourself if you're really hungry or if it's just a craving, and so on... nothing seems to work. i am trying to not restrict myself too much as i know that can just cause more stress and more bingeing. i think one of my main issues might be that i don't really know what "hunger" is. it's hard to explain, but usually i will just eat food because i want to, or because it's time. i cannot NOT eat something that's on my plate, even if i don't particularly like it. i don't understand how people, in the middle of a meal, can be like "i don't want this anymore". i try to exercise regularly but on account of this eating problem i am steadily gaining back all the weight i worked so hard to lose. being an endomoprh (the only one in my family) does not help at all. i was just wondering if anyone had any ideas on how to deal with this. one more thing: it's not quite possible to eliminate the snacks seeing as how i live with my family who has no problem whatsoever snacking on cookies and leftovers and such. gah. thanks!
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