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UMBILICAL Posts: 12,786
1/27/11 9:32 P


AARONS0925 SparkPoints: (0)
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Posts: 7
1/22/11 11:34 P

Absolutely, to go from doing a half marathon in 2006 to topping out at 285 this year sucks. I really am trying to turn things around, but after you get to 40 it seems like it get exponetially harder.

DUTCHPETE641 SparkPoints: (121,654)
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Posts: 5,390
1/20/11 5:40 A

It does for me yes, it is the sweating and the red face that I never liked! Always looked like I was going to have a heart attack!

WINLIFE SparkPoints: (0)
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Posts: 12
1/3/11 7:03 P

I absolutely feel my weight affects my self esteem, but perhaps it is the other way around? How could someone with high self esteem allow themselves to eat badly and not exercise. Perhaps it's backwards: my body reflects my original lack of self esteem and as I raise my self esteem my body will follow?

CATFISHJOHN SparkPoints: (0)
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Posts: 5
12/9/10 1:14 P

How could it not? Although it affects different people differently. When you look bad you're not going to feel your best. It affects social life, sex life, self esteem, work, etc, etc. It affects how people see you and how you see yourself.

Edited by: CATFISHJOHN at: 12/9/2010 (13:16)
PAULKNUTH SparkPoints: (135,585)
Fitness Minutes: (39,171)
Posts: 7,390
12/8/10 7:54 P

definitely - sucks to not fit in a restaurant booth, squeeze into airline seat and being afraid the chair is going to give when you get stuck sitting in one of those cheap folding chairs at events.

CUREFAN17 Posts: 131
12/6/10 12:50 A

I don't have a lot to lose, but I don't like how I see myself with the extra pounds.

MEINI002 SparkPoints: (0)
Fitness Minutes: (14,672)
Posts: 119
12/4/10 7:17 P

Absolutely. I can tune it out -- and my self esteem is fine, but I find I try to avoid getting my picture taken, I am uncomfortable walking through a crowd (because I take up more space), and I hate travelling (because I don't fit the airplane seats well).

ROCK_CLIMBER2 Posts: 328
11/29/10 10:31 P

rock on man, and Thank You for your service and sacrifice. Doing what you do makes it possible for all of us to do what we do. If your still in, Keep your head down!

ROCK_CLIMBER2 Posts: 328
11/29/10 10:28 P

to date i've lost 34 pounds and it was the best thing I've done ever. I feel better, I'm getting more looks from the ladies, etc can't believe I didn't do this sooner!!!!!

11/28/10 4:07 P the bedroom, at work, at school, permeates everything I do.

GRAPEMASTER SparkPoints: (0)
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Posts: 1,317
11/23/10 2:23 A


BLIZZTEE SparkPoints: (0)
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Posts: 195
11/8/10 2:21 A


11/7/10 11:22 P

The biggest issue with self-esteem damage, IMO, is an insidious side effect: self-pity. I'd say that was one of my worst enemies early on. It undermines confidence and drives you away from those who can help you.

Also... I have a feeling that the self-esteem bit is just as big with guys as it is with women. We just have a tendency to internalize more, and American masculine culture doesn't encourage open talk about these kinds of issues. To some extent, that may be a good thing. I don't ever want my buddy to ask me if his ass looks fat in those jeans. ;)

Edited by: DON_EUCLID at: 11/7/2010 (23:23)
WALKINGTALL85 Posts: 1,063
11/4/10 4:26 P

It sure has.

ROAD_WARRIOR649 SparkPoints: (10,714)
Fitness Minutes: (5,258)
Posts: 11
11/4/10 2:42 P

It has worked on me my entire life. From growing up wearing Sears 'Husky' pants, to wrestling in High School against guys with arms the size of my thighs. Always on the edge of 'too big' and a Type II Diabetic on top of that (runs in the family).

Add to that an all expense paid trip to sunny Iraq, 130 degree temps and a cute little portable oven called Body Armor. It took over 40 years, but I finally started making some changes now that I hope I can stick with when I get back to the world...

DUTCHPETE641 SparkPoints: (121,654)
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Posts: 5,390
9/20/10 6:10 A

Yes it has, am a lot more insecure than I used to be!

LANCE992 SparkPoints: (51,290)
Fitness Minutes: (96,575)
Posts: 598
9/15/10 10:44 P

I know for me being on weight watchers and being at lifetime has had an effect. If I gain even a little I get seriously depressed for about a week or two. Like today I gained...I don't even wanna say...3 lbs!!. I know a lotta guys would think...3 lbs in a week he must have eaten like a pig but I only made stupid food choices at dinnertime.

Seriously depressed.

Edited by: LANCE992 at: 9/15/2010 (22:46)
INTHEWORKS1 Posts: 981
9/15/10 1:26 P

Yes. I feel a lot better now after losing 16 pounds. I will see what kind of comments I get tonight as I play basketball with kids that I haven't played against since Spring (church youth group). I think they will see a 40 year old keeping up with them a lot better. That will help my self esteem.

PEABODY69 Posts: 317
9/15/10 11:10 A


Fitness Minutes: (31,721)
Posts: 367
9/4/10 10:51 A

Yes, though it's not the only thing.


I try to remind myself even if/when I get thin, THAT DOESN'T AUTOMATICALLY SOLVE EVERYTHING!

NEUTRALHILLS SparkPoints: (20,093)
Fitness Minutes: (37,594)
Posts: 391
9/3/10 3:35 P

I would have said NO if you'd asked me that over a year and 60 lbs ago. Now that I'm trimmer and a damn sight healthier, the answer is a resounding YES.

The slimmer I am and the more physically capable I become, the better I feel about myself. I also have more energy and confidence thanks to over a year of continuous regular exercise.

There's no way in hell I'm backsliding this time. I enjoy the new me waaaay too much.

AQUAPOWERS SparkPoints: (17,037)
Fitness Minutes: (28,749)
Posts: 616
9/3/10 12:37 P

Yes it does and my self-esteem is now fantastic after meeting my weight loss goals.

GARIHOOD SparkPoints: (32,590)
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Posts: 1,748
9/3/10 9:15 A

Of course. Whenever you're self-consious your self esteem changes.

DUTCHPETE641 SparkPoints: (121,654)
Fitness Minutes: (83,555)
Posts: 5,390
9/2/10 3:53 A

Yes it does, I realised that I am the biggest bloke on our office floor! They are all skinny health nuts!

INTHEWORKS1 Posts: 981
7/30/10 6:57 P

Yes. I know I am every day showing the world I do not care enough to take care of myself. Things are going to change. I have hope!

7/30/10 2:27 P

Definitely. For the longest time I'd go out and not talk to anyone because I was worried that they'd only think of me as the fat guy. It didn't help that my friends were dragging me out to all these bars/clubs with skinny manorexic types. I started hanging out with people that appreciated me for who I was and that, in turn, helped give me the confidence to make a change. A good support group is worth its weight in gold.

Change doesn't happen overnight. I still struggle with worrying what people think about me. And I see people that are much skinnier and it does get to me, but then I realize that I just bought a pair of size 40 pants after 2 years of wearing size 44. I have my own achievements and accomplishments and they're only going to continue.

Wow. Long way of saying, "yes".

ZANEITE SparkPoints: (0)
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Posts: 8
7/30/10 10:20 A

Lack of self-esteem is one of the main reasons I came to SparkPeople. It got to the point where I dreaded to see pictures from business conferences. It always seemed I was the fat guy standing out in a world of the slim.

I've got a long way to go but at least I feel a sense of relief in working the Spark program.

GETNFITGUY SparkPoints: (23,650)
Fitness Minutes: (25,262)
Posts: 734
7/30/10 9:01 A

When I weighed 237, it absolutely did. I didn't care about what I ate because I was already fat. I didn't want to work out because even running 1-2 miles would seem difficult even though it used to be easy for me. Now that I'm down to 188 and feeling great, that is is a feeling I will not let myself ever feel again.

For me, the guilt of over being fat was a bigger motivation in losing weight than self esteem was. I was pissed that I let myself balloon up to that weight I finally decided to do something about it, and I'm glad I did.

FITPRO77 Posts: 1,821
7/30/10 9:01 A

Im ok where i am now but weight definitely affects my esteem. Its a catch 22 because when im leqaner i feel scrawny....I'm never happy and always want to be better.

7/30/10 7:18 A

Absolutely!! The negativity of myself affected my overall mood. I made life miserable for those around me & just wanted to be by myself. I'm generally a likable person, but tend to hide my low self-esteem behind humor. For me, lower weight makes me a more likable, kinder person with a greater tendency to smile.

I'm on this journey for a overall better lifestyle; mostly for me, but for all those around me.

Edited by: STURGSTANG at: 7/30/2010 (12:24)
MALLEUSMIKE Posts: 1,006
7/29/10 10:18 A

Yes it did. And since my self-esteem was low that translated into a negative perspectives on a lot of things. Since I've lost the weight one of the first things my wife pointed out was that she noticed I felt a lot better about myself.

INTHEWORKS1 Posts: 981
7/29/10 1:22 A

Yes it has. I know that only I am responsible for how big I am. Not my momma, not my pappa. Just me. For me, the damages self esteem is what kicks me into gear. I wish it didn't have to get that far, but it has.

ARAPP31 SparkPoints: (0)
Fitness Minutes: (2,752)
Posts: 167
7/20/10 5:22 P


TRWAGNER1 Posts: 85
7/20/10 7:35 A


TOMMYKJR Posts: 11,114
7/19/10 10:58 A


7/19/10 10:51 A

Yes. I mean I get laid but the type of people that lay are getting less and less attractive. Weight training has helped me out though. The stronger I feel the more confident I feel.

7/13/10 3:58 P

I you'd asked me 100 pounds ago I'd have said no. In reality it did. Be strong and make it happen. There are too many positive results examples here to believe it can't be you too!

7/13/10 6:21 A

I certainly did feel that way when I was a Fat Boy.

Know this, it's OUR OWN choice to be healthy or not.....I am living proof of that.

You can do it, Brother, because under your rotund exterior is a slim handsome SEX machine and if you add lifting weights to your weekly exercise schedule you'll be buffed and you'll LIKE it!

JCATOE Posts: 95
7/12/10 11:27 P

usually not an issue, but is becoming more so as the weight got higher. Shirt off at the pool is a little uncomfortable. Also kind of depressing when the size XL starts getting too tight. Hoping to change that.

7/12/10 10:32 A

Of course. I usually don't have a problem 99% of the time. But sometimes those moments creep in where I am just completely disgusted with myself, but I am working to change that.

7/11/10 8:16 P

Heaven's yes. It actually has me in a bit of a downward cycle. Weight lowers self-esteem, increases need for comfort food, adds to weight, weight lowers self-esteem....

JDMAKEIT2HOT Posts: 8,458
7/10/10 9:47 A

yes! i felt so great when i got down to 157, then shot back up to 178 and my selfesteen got super low even though ive been back on track for a few weeks now i still feel like a big cow.

7/9/10 11:14 P

Yes, I was (am?) the cliche "fat guy" side kick.

DLCJ21 Posts: 1,721
7/9/10 5:09 P

I've never really had any self esteem problems. Even when I was 400 pounds I didn't really care what people thought about me. I was pretty embarrassed when I went on walks with coworkers and was sweating all over the place, or when I was in an important meeting and couldn't stop sweating due to just coming up a flight of stairs. If that counts as self esteem, then I guess my weight affected me.

Even now from time to time, I'll look at myself and feel like I'm that same guy, but he's been gone for a while now and he's not coming back as far as I can help it!

I feel good about myself most days but I'm sure we all have those days where we look in the mirror and don't like what we see...even those of us who have made huge changes still get those feelings.

--MEOW-- Posts: 4,516
7/9/10 1:42 P

emoticon yes....
I can't even stand looking at myself in the mirror

ROB2006 SparkPoints: (0)
Fitness Minutes: (102)
Posts: 1,005
7/9/10 12:50 P

Yes it has. I hardly have any self esteem and that is also a snowball affect as I am having a hard time changing my life around since I do not have any good feelings towards myself.

MARYGRACE25 Posts: 193
7/9/10 11:52 A

Hey guys. I know this is the GUYS' lounge, and this is the first time I have ever even glanced at this message board, but I just had to jump in on this one.

First of all, you should not be embarrassed by sweating. I am not overweight but every single time I go to the gym I get sweatier than I have EVER seen someone at the gym. Like, totally drenched. It's not because I am running 15 miles or anything-- i just sweat a LOT. Whatever. It's just a sign that your body is working hard.

Second, I would rather be with a guy who is overweight who exercises than an "average" weight guy who doesn't exercise. Exercising is a sign that you value yourself and you want to take care of your body. That is very important for many women.

Third, regular exercise has been proven to raise your self esteem (and also increase your energy level and decrease your stress level).

So, sorry for butting in to your "GUYS'" conversation, but I wanted to say keep up the hard work and don't let your self esteem get down :)

7/9/10 7:52 A

Most definitely!

Occasionally I will go to a mall and walk by one of those horrid wall length mirrors and catch a glimpse of myself. For the next few minutes I feel awful.I wonder if that is intentional, if one feels down, maybe they will spend more in some of the overpriced stores to try to look better?

I am a heavy sweater, always have been. I can stand still in an ac frozen room and sweat. It always embarrasses me, and it gets worse when I exercise. Though it bothers me when I think of it, what I say to myself is so what. I may be sweating now, but I am exercising. I may be obese, but I am working to change that. I will always sweat, but I wont always be this fat.

I have to admit,as I am losing weight and starting to see the effects of exercise, I am starting to love my body. Don't think I have ever done that!

Take pride in your sweat, it means you are changing!


FATN43 Posts: 236
7/9/10 5:28 A

it shouldnt but for alot of guys it does...i know for myself for example i feel very embarrassed when i'm walking along and sweating really heavily and no matter what my pores just wont close.
and people stare at me as if i'm a freak...another thing that brings me down is when i see a reflection of myself as i'm walking soon as i see that bulging tummy or my double chin i just feel sad...
does anyone else feel like that or worse?

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