You might like to read "My Big Fat Boyfriend: How to lose weight while dating a diet disaster" - I remember reading it a while ago and liking it's lighthearted approach. It was just nice to read that I'm not the only one who feels like this! www.amazon.com/Your-Big-Boyfriend-Jenna-Be
My hubs also eats OUTSTANDING amounts of food to both cut and build. It really helps me that he doesn't eat terrible food (pop tarts and potato chips?!? that's not a very good source of fuel for a healthy body) and that I'm aware that I need to eat less and differently than him. I try a taste of whatever he has, then make and eat my own food. You might see if there are other good suggestions over at the forums on forum.bodybuilding.com/
Last, but certainly not least, start strength training yourself if you aren't already doing it. Now that I do the big five lifts as a center of my exercises, I'm looking waaaaaaay fitter and losing weight AND I get to eat more than before.