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Why can't I do this?????????



 
 
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SLIMMERKIWI
SparkPoints: (122,769)
Fitness Minutes: (32,500)
Posts: 21,117
2/28/13 3:09 P

JRWELL58 - we responded out of concern, and the general advice was not wrong. Unfortunately you hadn't qualified that you were under the care of an Endocrinologist which would have made quite a difference to the comments. It could also make a difference to others who read this thread - they can see that yours was an exception rather than the rule. In certain circumstances, yes, it is fine to go under, but when a person does, they need ongoing qualified medical help as you are getting. The comments applied to the majority of the population who aren't being supervised. For them it can have very serious consequences.

Kris

Edited by: SLIMMERKIWI at: 2/28/2013 (15:10)


SWIMOM
Posts: 366
2/28/13 1:43 P

People have been dieting for decades in this same 1200 cals a day manner, JR. With Hashi's, menopause and age going against my will, 1200 cals a day would not be unheard of from a physician's point of view. Endo's are more in tune to nutrition than most other physician's having to deal with DM all day, everyday. I'd be much more likely to follow an Endo's advise than other specialists perhaps. I choose to eat more like my goal weight maint. in a zig-zag manner while others like a set in stone number to shoot for each day. Do what works....as long as it keeps us healthy.



JRWELL58
Posts: 227
2/28/13 8:31 A

Okay, once and for all, to all the folks on this board who think they are doctors, and there are many of you (lol), I see my endoncronologist every 3 months and have labs run every three months, and he is highly supportive of me being on a 1200 calorie a day diet as well as doing the cardio. There...that should do it. If not, I can copy and paste as necessary.



SLIMMERKIWI
SparkPoints: (122,769)
Fitness Minutes: (32,500)
Posts: 21,117
2/27/13 11:58 P

JRWELL58 - If you try to eat NO MORE than 1200 cal's daily, then you just might end up suffering as a result. Under 1200 calories (for an average weight woman who is sedentary) is the bare minimum - overweight people and/or those exercising NEED more!

Kris




LILLIPUTIANNA
Posts: 1,038
2/27/13 11:10 P

JRWELL58,

No MORE than 1200 calories and then cardio? Are you sure about that? 1200 should be the absolute least amount of calories for a woman. Less than that can cause you troubles. When you factor in exercise, that makes your deficit even greater, and is even more dangerous. Please double check your settings here on SP to make sure you are meeting your dietary needs.

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JRWELL58
Posts: 227
2/27/13 6:59 P

I understand completely. It is disheartening to eat no more than 1200 calories a day, do an hour of cardio, and still not lose a single ounce for the week.

But we CAN do this....we just have to stick with it! Eventually, science will prevail!



MYBODYNEEDSTHIS
SparkPoints: (675)
Fitness Minutes: (1,159)
Posts: 61
2/27/13 6:39 P

You are doing it...one goal a day met = success; do one thing at a time one day a week...i.e. have an extra serving of vegetables, then next day keep vegs on list and add exercise 10 mins. So on and so on - look at the small daily victories that will lead up to May instead of...I AM NOT ANYWHERE CLOSE TO BE MY IDEAL PHYSIQUE THAT I WANT FOR THE MONTH OF MAY

I know because I graduate in June and I do not want to walk across that stage fat....but I am doing one goal a day AND one day at a time...this is the only thing that stops me from just giving up

this way if I do at least one more thing better than the day before I do not feel as if I have sabotaged myself

hopes this helps



LOVEMOUSE82
SparkPoints: (3,788)
Fitness Minutes: (2,976)
Posts: 349
2/27/13 6:51 A

Please stop referring to the "diet wagon". None of here are on a diet wagon. We are living a healthy lifestyle, step by step.

Maybe to change your thinking about this, stop focusing in your weight. Focus on other things like how much energy you have or what new exercise you are able to do. Whatever you are doing please remember that you can only do it if it is something you can keep up for the rest of your life. This is not about depriving yourself with the latest diet trend. This is not a diet. This is about a way to live to promote healthiness and wellbeing over all in your life. Maybe you keep "falling back" because you have unrealistic expectations. As I mentioned In another of my posts, this isn't all oatmeal and cucumbers! Take some time to research delicious nutritious foods that you think you'll be able to incorporate into your daily life. Do a bit of exercise that you think you'll be able to stick with in your daily life. Taking baby steps to better your lifestyle is what will help you out.

Also don't think you have to deprive yourself of the foods you love. You can eat anything in moderation. Track your foods to get a good idea of where your calories are coming from and little by little adjust as needed.

Edited by: LOVEMOUSE82 at: 2/27/2013 (06:54)


YELLOWDAHLIA
SparkPoints: (83,472)
Fitness Minutes: (120)
Posts: 11,770
2/26/13 10:49 A

Snoopy, the reason you can't do it is because you keep telling yourself you can't.

Remove the word "can't" from your vocabulary...because you can do it....and you know you can.



CILER11
Posts: 265
2/26/13 10:16 A

You CAN do this. You ARE doing this. You are making an effort everyday to improve your life. Some days you do better than others and thats life. Remember it is progress not perfection.

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JRWELL58
Posts: 227
2/25/13 6:58 P

Hey Lilli, I like what you said.

I'm not "trying to lose weight."

I'm losing weight, by golly.



SNOOPY1960
Posts: 1,680
2/25/13 2:48 P

Thank you all for the responses and encouragement.

I am not good with my water. I have to work on that.

I love love love fruit , veggies , chicken and fish but I also love love love sugar and carbs. So this morning, I went to the market and bought whole wheat bread, eggs, salad stuff, chicken, Kashi cereal, oatmeal and lots of fruit. If I don't have the bad stuff here, I won't eat it.

Yes, stress is killing me but I have to learn to that there are some things out of my control.

I also have a dog who freaks out when I pick up the leash so I need to learn that HE can be my workout buddy !!! My dog loves to be outside.

Thank you all again for the support, this is why I love this site .

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ARCHIMEDESII
SparkPoints: (136,690)
Fitness Minutes: (205,455)
Posts: 20,319
2/25/13 12:08 P

Snoopy,

You are being way too hard on yourself !! I know you've been under a lot of stress recently. I'm a firm believer that stress is a neglected aspect of weight gain. If a person could reduce their stress, they'd automatically reduce their waistline. You need to try to relax. I know that's not easy, but like I said, stress can cause a person to neglect their health.

You can't look at good health or weight loss with an all or nothing mentality. If the only healthy thing you did for yourself was drink 8 glasses of water today, that's still a step in the right direction.

Set some simple goals. Don't try to be too ambitious or you are setting yourself up for failure. Remember, you're trying to change habits learned over a life time. that's not going to happen overnight, a week, a month or even a year. Change takes time. that's why SP encourages its members to start with some simple changes first.

Example, if you're not eating 6-9 servings of fresh fruit and veggies, set a goal to eat 2-3 servings each day for one week. If you're not drinking 8 glasses of water, set a goal to drink 2-4 glasses each day for one week. If you're not exercising, don't try to workout for an hour. Set a goal to take a 30 minute walk each day for one week. Once you've achieved these goals, then you set new ones.

No "all or nothing" mentality. every little bit really does make a difference. You have to believe that.

So, what simple goals are you ready to set for this week ? Will you eat 2-3 servings of veggies each day ? will you take a daily walk ? will you drink more water than soda ? If so, then you're on your way to a healthier lifestyle.







LILLIPUTIANNA
Posts: 1,038
2/25/13 11:46 A

Okay. Slow down. Your language is at the foundation of your troubles here.

A friend of mine, who is a doctor of Psychology, used to help people learn to stop smoking. Over and over again people would tell him that they were "trying" to stop smoking...but trying isn't SUCCEEDING. Trying means you're failing. So, the first thing he had them do was say, "I have quit smoking."

With your case, you are saying "I can't do this." Heck, you aren't even saying that you are TRYING to do this. Your words say you have already failed without even trying.

I am giving you a homework assignment. For one week, you have to say, "I AM doing this. I AM making progress." You are not allowed to say "can't" or "try." You WILL succeed, because you have the strength to do so.



PEORIAPOLE
SparkPoints: (42,374)
Fitness Minutes: (80,618)
Posts: 715
2/25/13 11:33 A

Snoop...

I'm right there with you. I've voiced several times throughout this site that I have educated myself and know what to do and how to do it...then why am I not doing it?

I can't pretend to be a success story in terms of actual weight loss or healthier living because I am not. I am success story in that I keep returning and trying again and again, and I believe that is your success as well.

We just need to keep trying until we find something that sticks. Problem is, there is no cookie cutter recipe. I saw on your homepage that you stated you are an emotional eater. What type of emotional eater? I took the little quiz and was surprised that I was labeled an emotional eater, but I never thought of boredom as an emotion. When I get a handle that, I do better with the late night grazing, but it is a struggle almost every night.

The following is part of my latest approach:

1. Journal positive things I did in the past day---This is important to me because I am a pretty negative about myself.
2. Log honestly and completely-Who am I trying to please by not being honest on the food and activity logs? I doubt if anyone but me looks at them anyway

As you can see, I'm not even starting up again with stating I am going to eat healthier or be active X amount of minutes in a day. Hopefully, by keeping these in mind, I will make better choices.

Matt



SIMPLELIFE2
Posts: 699
2/25/13 10:35 A

Perhaps you can think about revising your goals and attitude. You have a goal "to look good" at a distant point in time. It's easy to keep putting it off tomorrow. Try coming up with goals that are focused not on you appearance but on health, feeling better, having more energy, intrinsic goals that have more to do with about how you feel, both mentally and physically. Write them down. Review them every day. And when you feel yourself slipping, ask if this brings you closer to those goals.

Next, focus your goals on the process -- things you can control -- not the outcome -- which really depends on so many factors. Process goals could include drinking 8 glasses of water, eating X amount of veggies, fruits and grams of protein. If you focus on getting the good stuff in, you won't have room for poor choices. What are your fitness goals? How many minutes? How many days? Each time you hit those marks, record it. It is success. And once you add up all of those little successes, you will meet your goals.

Stop thinking of it of the "diet wagon." You are trying to adopt a healthier lifestyle. That has no beginning or end. Perhaps you fear that you won't look "good enough" in the given time so you are sabotaging yourself. Some progress is better than no progress. And I'm sure you can find an outfit that will flatter no matter where you are in the process. Another issue with having an event-based goal is what are you going to do when it's over -- do you go back to your unhealthy ways? Does it not matter anymore?

And, frankly, it is your daughter's graduation. I'm sure most of the focus will be on her. It is her day. I'm sure she will proud and thankful for all that you did to help you get her to that day, regardless of how you look. She loves you for who you are, not what you look like. Just let you love and pride shine through and you will be beautiful.



IROCK40
SparkPoints: (6,732)
Fitness Minutes: (2,103)
Posts: 90
2/25/13 10:26 A

What is your ideal of blowing it? Are you stuck in a perfection problem? Maybe you are doing better than you think but making one mistake leads you to the "I can't do it" thinking. Try to give yourself credit for what you have done instead of beating yourself up for what you didn't do. Sounds to me like you have had a couple of great days where you felt super positive about your choices. YAHOOO!! Good for you. If this week you have 2 great days then next week celebrate 3 great days. Or maybe you had an excellent breakfast but struggled at lunch or at dinner. Well congrats on that excellent breakfast. You can do!!





IMSUNSHINE
Posts: 153
2/25/13 8:49 A

I think we all have bad days or even a bad week but you have to be strong mentally to get back on track!



APPRIL
Posts: 2,238
2/25/13 8:46 A

ADHD? You need a daily reminder of your commitment. Write it down.Write down what you want to do and why you want to do it. Read it every morning. Read it every night. Read it at every meal if you have to. And when you fall off, just dust yourself off and get going again.



SWIMOM
Posts: 366
2/25/13 8:15 A

Hi Snoopy,

I sent a PM. Hope it helps make your week a bit more doable. Good luck and hang on Snoopy!

Edited by: SWIMOM at: 2/25/2013 (08:15)


SLIMMERKIWI
SparkPoints: (122,769)
Fitness Minutes: (32,500)
Posts: 21,117
2/25/13 4:55 A

Sometimes there is a lot of emotional baggage from the past which can interfere with our being able to move on, and good nutrition and/or exercise is part of what gets blocked. IF this applies to you, then you may benefit from making an appointment with your Dr and talking to him/her about it, and possibly asking for a referral to a Therapist who deals with this sort of thing. They will be able to give you the tools to help you through.

Apart from that, are you trying to change lots of things at once? Are you actively depriving yourself of things that you enjoy? When you aren't falling off the wagon, are you restricting your calories etc. too much? Are you eating ALL your meals?

I would suggest that you start at the beginning again, but just change ONE OR TWO things, and allow your mind/body to get used to the changes before adding something else to the mix. It might be mobilizing a wee bit more in your day! It might also be replacing some soda/juice with some water.

Don't go trying for any quick losses, because I can assure you, if you do, it WILL go back on after. You are better aiming at SOME weight-loss rather than giving yourself a specific goal.

Below are some links that you may find helpful:
www.sparkpeople.com/resource/wellness_arti
cles.asp?id=55


www.sparkpeople.com/resource/wellness_arti
cles.asp?id=1396


www.sparkpeople.com/resource/wellness_arti
cles.asp?id=693


Finally, don't look on this as a 'diet' because it isn't one - it is merely a healthy lifestyle!

You can do this - you KNOW deep down that you can, otherwise you wouldn't have joined SP and you wouldn't be here now! I hope that you find what properly motivates you to do this, but unfortunately, only you can find that!

Take care,
Kris



BEANBYDESIGN
SparkPoints: (31,282)
Fitness Minutes: (36,402)
Posts: 1,021
2/24/13 10:42 P

Only you can answer that.

What do you get out of being heavy? Really think about it - there's something you get out of it, or think you get out of it, otherwise you wouldn't be self-sabotaging. For some people, it's a way of avoiding the spotlight or unwanted attention, or of having a convenient excuse not to do things you're afraid of doing, or of giving yourself an excuse for failure in other areas of your life. It could be a rebellion against someone in your life who is overly critical, a way of claiming control by controlling what you eat. It could be that being overweight has become an integral part of your self-image, the story that you tell yourself about who you are, and you're afraid to let go of it because you are afraid of who you'll be (or who you think you'll have to become) if you're not "the fat one" or however you think of it. It could also be because a loved one is also overweight, and you're afraid of making that person feel rejected or "left behind" if you get healthy and they don't. Or it could be that you're worried a relationship in your life that's important to you won't survive if you get healthy and the other person doesn't, because without the unhealthy habits you wont have anything in common.

Figure out what you perceive yourself as losing when you lose the weight, and that should help you figure out why you sabotage yourself.

Edited by: BEANBYDESIGN at: 2/24/2013 (22:43)


SNOOPY1960
Posts: 1,680
2/24/13 10:27 P

I know exactly WHAT to do, I just can't seem to do it day after day. I am great for a few days, then I fall off the diet wagon and gain whatever it was I lost. Ugg........
How can I stay on track ?
My oldest Daughter will graduate college in 10 weeks !! I got until May 4th to look even halfway decent...............what is wrong with me ? Why do I self sabotage over and over??

Edited by: SNOOPY1960 at: 2/24/2013 (22:32)


 
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