Wow...that is nasty. I'd say these ppl have listed the best options for fixing the situation , especially making sure to tell her, when you give her some q-tips, how dangerous it is... she may have an addiction to it, which is really crazy, but apparently it happens-- One time my 4-yr old was playing on my computer and needed help, and when I went to fix it for him, he had randomly stumbled upon a website called earpick.com(I think thats what it was) and it was a fetish website for picking your ears, wth?!! Maybe she just has serious issues. Definitely educate her on the harm.
I would suggest to her that using bobby pins to clean ears is a bad idea because it could damage her ears. Tell her how you clean your ears. Let her know that using stuff of yours without permission is not okay. Give her some bobby pins of her own and tell her to leave yours alone. Put your stuff away. Find a new roommate. (I guess it depends on if this is the only bad point she has.)
Thanks for all the advice. I want to make sure that I'm kind about it but I'm going to let her know that the situation bothers me enough to find a new place to live. We are going to school together. We are not in a homeless shelter or anything. (thanks for pointing out that she might have a mental delay) I don't know her that well and she might not understand that what she is doing is really grossing me out.
Edited by: KDRICH24 at: 8/9/2013 (14:44)
Fitness Minutes: (60)
221 8/9/13 1:52 P
I would use her toothbrush to clean the toliet right in front of her...J/K. I would keep my stuff in my room and put out a box of Qtips.
I *love* Dropcone's idea of making her a gift of some bobby pins! You could even decorate the tin and wrap it with a little bow. Then you're being nice but DEFINITELY making your point of "these are yours, those are mine. We have boundaries."
What is your relationship like otherwise, and who exactly is this roommate? Are you students, or do you live in some sort of sheltered housing, or what? Because frankly, this sounds like a person with some developmental delays or social interaction disorder. If she has something like Asperger's syndrome that makes it hard for her to understand how other people think and feel, then treating it as joke would actually be cruel. If she does have Asperger's (or if you suspect she might have it and not know it,) then you need to be frank and open and tell her why you want her to stop-- "Most people think that any substance that comes out of the body is gross. To me, ear wax is just like boogers. Even though logically I know that it doesn't have as many germs as boogers, it makes me *feel* the same way. Nobody wants someone else's boogers in their hair, right?" You can still give her a little box of pins of her own, but as a solution rather than a little joke.
Yuck, that's pretty gross. I'm not sure it's in the "must move now!" category of offense, but you definitely want to deal with it.
First, I'd make sure you explained to her exactly why this is not acceptable, because she sounds kind of dense on the subject. Don't be "nice", be firm. Say right out: "Look, when you use my bobby pins and cover them in ear wax and then put it back with my other pins, your gross, disgusting ear wax gets all over the other pins and then into my hair, and this is GROSS, so STOP IT." Don't even say please. For serious, this is gross.
If you feel like you really can't do that, give her some of your pins in a cheap container like a breath mint box. Label it with her name and give it to her, and say pointedly: "Here, these are YOUR bobby pins. Do with them what you will, Ms. Ear Wax." Then make a point of always cleaning up your bobby pins and never touching hers.
Hope that helps!
Fitness Minutes: (28,138)
1,778 8/9/13 12:00 P
GROSS! What else does she do when you are not there to see it? Time to move!
I am amazed at how unthoughtful some people are... I'd be finding me a new room mate. What other bad habits does she have that could spread infections
Fitness Minutes: (15,897)
281 8/8/13 6:42 P
I would be hiding the bobby pins in my room and buying q-tips to leave in the bathroom. THat is gross. If she seeks out the bobby pins I vote for the new roommate. This just grosses me out. Sorry you are having to deal with this.
Definitely put the bobby pins away where she won't see them. And then start looking for a different place to live. It's not the kind of thing where you would move out right away or throw her out, but it's definitely justifiable to move away as soon as the lease or term is over. As someone said, it's both a hygiene and a personal boundaries issue.
Fitness Minutes: (31,937)
3,656 8/8/13 4:27 P
I'd buy her a pack of cotton buds (is that the same as Q tips?) and ask her to use those in future as you don't want her to use YOUR bobby pins for that purpose. If she persists - do you have a choice about who you room with or are you stuck with her for the foreseeable future?
Well I left all the bobby pins on the counter so I guess it was my fault but I found a bobby pin in my case with ear wax in it. I dont know if I picked it up off the counter and put it in the case or if she did it. I asked her to stop and told her when i found it and then she did it again. maybe I'm rude! I don't want to be.
Fitness Minutes: (6,555)
2,273 8/8/13 4:13 P
Find a new roommate ASAP. This one shows a) an incredible lack of respect for personal space b) Terrible personal hygine c) amazing stupidity (seriously, since when was using a bobby pin to clean your ears a good idea? Doctors are now saying that q-tips are a bad idea and just leave your ears alone)
One question though: she seriously took a bobby pin that was in a case and not just lying around somewhere, cleaned her ears, and then put it back?
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