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SHERYLDS Posts: 13,141
3/20/13 2:04 P

Darlene Gates was the actress who played the role of the housebound mother in 'What's Eating Gilbert Grape'.

In her early years, she took solace in food. Her overeating, compounded by a thyroid condition and slow metabolism, led to obesity. She underwent gastroplasty in 1981 when she weighed 410 pounds and lost 100 pounds afterwards, but eventually gained the weight back plus more, topping out at 550 pounds. In 1986, pelvic infections due to her weight problems kept her bedridden for two years, during which she gained an additional 150 pounds.

Cates is down from 575 to 331 lbs., and hopes to lose 100 more. With luck, she'll be back outside before long, and will hopefully act again – following her acclaimed work two decades ago.
read more
www.people.com/people/article/0,,20619456,
00.html


Edited by: SHERYLDS at: 3/20/2013 (14:07)
Sheryl from New Jersey, EST...2015 Spring final wt. 225
EL for 2015 Spring 5% Challenge Team Spirited Underdogs
XSCAPEREALITY82 SparkPoints: (4,208)
Fitness Minutes: (1,821)
Posts: 121
3/20/13 1:59 P

I read an article last year that due to a serious medical condition, she was hospitalised for a year and lost 250 pounds. I haven't seen anything about her recently though.

Elizabeth "Ebee"

"No matter how far you have gone down a wrong road, turn back." (Peruvian Proverb)

RIET69 SparkPoints: (47,087)
Fitness Minutes: (11,285)
Posts: 3,116
3/20/13 1:43 P

Has anyone here ever seen the movie "What's Eating Gilbert Grape?" It is a very interesting and sad movie about a mom who is very large. The mom was played by a real 'very large' woman, not an actress. I have seen the film some years ago, and remember it to this day. It made a big impression on me. All I could think was: "There but for the grace of God go I."

LOSTLIME SparkPoints: (74,331)
Fitness Minutes: (21,430)
Posts: 19,221
3/20/13 1:07 P

I don't watch the show. I think that we have to pray for her. She is seriously on a suicide mission. This can only damage her health. But this is her choice and we can't tell her what to do.

BUNNYKICKS Posts: 2,386
3/20/13 1:06 P

"I think most of us have been there…that’s why we are here.

So my point is…
Even when I said: “ I don’t care”…..Inside of me….I did.
And I think that extreme behavior is a silent scream for help."
-------------------

Wow does that ever resonate with me.

Goal 1 - break 200 (46 pounds lost)**DONE**
Goal 2 - leave obesity behind (BMI 29.9, at 185#) **DONE**
Goal 3 - BMI = Normal (154# or less)
SHERYLDS Posts: 13,141
3/20/13 1:01 P

Even when people are doing negative things for attention getting,
Especially when the behavior is self destructive, and appears intentional,
it may be a cry for help.

I am obese…I have never been morbidly obese…I am 5’11” .
I am big and tall.
To thin, small, petite people….I am sure they considered me GROSS.
Everything is relative….

And there have been times when I gave up and just ate what I felt like having,
even though I KNEW that it might add a few pounds.
I think most of us have been there…that’s why we are here.

So my point is…
Even when I said: “ I don’t care”…..Inside of me….I did.
And I think that extreme behavior is a silent scream for help.

I think that my time at Spark and the people I have connected with,
has made me a lot more kinder and gentler now than when I started,
Not only to others…but also to myself.

Edited by: SHERYLDS at: 3/20/2013 (13:02)
Sheryl from New Jersey, EST...2015 Spring final wt. 225
EL for 2015 Spring 5% Challenge Team Spirited Underdogs
BUNNYKICKS Posts: 2,386
3/20/13 12:26 P

"Attention seeking" - yes, that's it.

Looking at her case - she was always a big girl, with the associated "big girl problems" (parents on your case with the diet plans, bullied by peers, fat-discrimination etc. etc. etc.) and then she finds the "BBW" niche in the online world, where she is suddenly not a pariah, but a STAR.

How very compelling that must have been. For the first time in life, being told over and over again how beautiful you are...

Can i sigh once again?

sigh

Goal 1 - break 200 (46 pounds lost)**DONE**
Goal 2 - leave obesity behind (BMI 29.9, at 185#) **DONE**
Goal 3 - BMI = Normal (154# or less)
BUNNYKICKS Posts: 2,386
3/20/13 12:16 P

Yeah, I'm confused too... seemed like a normal sort of discussion to me... oh well... let's just carry on discussing...

I looked up Donna Simpson, which I believe is the lady from the "My Strange Addiction" show. And I then watched a couple of interviews with her. This one here www.youtube.com/watch?v=5nJlK4_mdaY shows her to be well-spoken and articulate, and gives a good glimpse into "what factors led her to where she ended up." I have so much empathy for this woman. I wish she had kept up her blog (which was once a fetish site where subscribers PAID $15-20/month to watch her eat and gain, that she attempted to turn into a family-friendly weight loss blog once she finally left her enabling/feeding so-called "fiance.")... but she hasn't posted to it in about a year. I wonder how she made out with her attempt to get healthier.

As she noted near the end of the video - people were INTERESTED in her, PAYING her, HELPING her, SUPPORTING her, to become so big, so unhealthy, so dependent. And as soon as she tries to do something good for herself, her health, her family - interest, support, INCOME, has all plummeted. "I'm on my own."

Sigh. I should change my closing paragraph from my previous post to "the extremes people will go to, in search of just a little bit of love and acceptance..."



Edited by: BUNNYKICKS at: 3/20/2013 (12:17)
Goal 1 - break 200 (46 pounds lost)**DONE**
Goal 2 - leave obesity behind (BMI 29.9, at 185#) **DONE**
Goal 3 - BMI = Normal (154# or less)
GLITTERFAIRY77 Posts: 8,023
3/20/13 12:03 P

Bunny-I think I agree. I believe it is not mental illness-rather attention seeking. With many people, negative attention is still attention-therefore, not negative.

MamiSheli53 is my MOM!!!

Abi~Rochester, NY

Aim for progress...NOT perfection.

Starting weight July 2012: 310
(dates of accomplishment for the following to come)
GW1: 280 passed 2/8/13-278!
GW2: 250
GW3: 220
GW4: 200
GW5: 175

I can do ALLLLLL things through Christ who strengthens me.


"It's a long, hard climb-but I'm gonna get there."

"If you stay focused on the past, you will never be able to see what lies ahead."
GLITTERFAIRY77 Posts: 8,023
3/20/13 12:01 P

AMB3RKENJI-Yeah. That was a little incongruent.

MamiSheli53 is my MOM!!!

Abi~Rochester, NY

Aim for progress...NOT perfection.

Starting weight July 2012: 310
(dates of accomplishment for the following to come)
GW1: 280 passed 2/8/13-278!
GW2: 250
GW3: 220
GW4: 200
GW5: 175

I can do ALLLLLL things through Christ who strengthens me.


"It's a long, hard climb-but I'm gonna get there."

"If you stay focused on the past, you will never be able to see what lies ahead."
I_HEART_MY_FAM Posts: 1,809
3/20/13 11:51 A

AMB3RKENJI- I know you are not talking to me, but it looks as if you are since I made the post. I'm confused on what made you mad on this thread.

LILLIPUTIANNA Posts: 1,042
3/20/13 11:47 A

This reminds me of the episode of the Simpsons where Homer decides to gain weight so he can work from home. That situation ended up badly for him as I remember.

emoticon

Edited by: LILLIPUTIANNA at: 3/20/2013 (11:48)
MANDIETERRIER1 Posts: 14,359
3/20/13 11:39 A

I have to admit, it does leave me scratching my head. It is out of my scope of comprehension.





Eat what you like and if someone comments, eat them too

My Rat Terrier has Congestive Heart Failure and other health problems. Making a purchase from
Mandies_Friends Zazzle Store helps with her medical costs
www.zazzle.com/mandies_friends+gifts

WHOVIAN85 Posts: 861
3/20/13 6:13 A

I'd appreciate if you removed my screen name from you post, you know who you. thank you!

"The good things don’t always soften the bad things — but vice versa — the bad things don’t necessarily spoil the good things or make them unimportant."
Doctor Who Series 5: Vincent and the Doctor
SW: 232
CW: 203.2
LGW: 150
DUBLINROSE Posts: 2,157
3/20/13 4:15 A

I feel sorry for them if that is their normal. They need help.

BLUENOSE63 SparkPoints: (107,996)
Fitness Minutes: (82,255)
Posts: 2,954
3/20/13 3:54 A

Two very insecure people doing destructive things. Yes they both need help. I don't get it either but hopefully he is there at the end when she ends up dying from food. Perhaps then he will see that it was such a great life choice for him to enable his wife.



I_HEART_MY_FAM Posts: 1,809
3/19/13 9:21 P

No, I do not think she wanted that at the beginning, she just gave up, and yes she does want it now because she has someone feeding on her weakness. Her nutty husband is pampering her to no end, but will he get tired of it, what if he dies then who will tend to her needs? Gross!

SHERYLDS Posts: 13,141
3/19/13 9:03 P

I'm not quite sure to whom AMB3RKENJI comments are directed....
but these threads are meant to be an exchange of opinions,
and we should agree to disagree.
I am not attacking anyone's opinion...
but please accept that someone else may see things differently.

In the event that you did not understand my comment ....
I think super morbidly obese people are in need of help
I think THEY are SAD....I think their enablers are hurting them
and I think instead of looking at them like freaks,
It would be great if they would get the psychological counseling they desperately need.


Edited by: SHERYLDS at: 3/19/2013 (21:04)
Sheryl from New Jersey, EST...2015 Spring final wt. 225
EL for 2015 Spring 5% Challenge Team Spirited Underdogs
VATRUCKER SparkPoints: (20,629)
Fitness Minutes: (36,922)
Posts: 526
3/19/13 8:59 P

this really sad. People allow themselves to be exploited on these reality shows for what I am sure is not worth whatever producers pay them. Health is a issue for serious consideration emoticon

i CAN And will do this in spite of any obstruction be it man or beast or, friend or foe vietnam12veteran@gmail.com
WHOVIAN85 Posts: 861
3/19/13 8:22 P

It's sad how some spark members can't respect others opinions on these forums!

"The good things don’t always soften the bad things — but vice versa — the bad things don’t necessarily spoil the good things or make them unimportant."
Doctor Who Series 5: Vincent and the Doctor
SW: 232
CW: 203.2
LGW: 150
SHERYLDS Posts: 13,141
3/19/13 7:46 P

Come On.
Do you honestly think that they want to be that way
or
do you think This is a human being who is in huge denial,
and is probably so used to being attacked
that they develop a defiant attitude.....I WANT TO BE LIKE THIS?
And in either case...they are in need of help....and pity.
It has to be painful, both mentally and physically, to live like that.
One person talks about a possible reality tv show.....
that's the kind of stupidity that encourage octomom.
They feel freaky so they figure make money on it....and their enabler significant others probably sees financial rewards by going along with this lunacy.

it's sad

Sheryl from New Jersey, EST...2015 Spring final wt. 225
EL for 2015 Spring 5% Challenge Team Spirited Underdogs
SASSYBRUN Posts: 192
3/19/13 7:29 P

I watched an interview with the 600 lb woman, she was talking about gaining weight the healthy way (lol) by eating baked chicken and salad. She was shown opening cupboards in her kitchen, I spied a big package of cinnamon buns (yeah I believe you lady, baked chicken lol).

The interesting thing was that her 4 yr old was quite slim, and when asked about it she said she wanted a healthy child (contradict yourself much lady?).

WHOVIAN85 Posts: 861
3/19/13 2:54 P

I have no respect for people who purposely behave in such manners, I've read and seen stories about one woman who did this because her husband wanted her big. It boggles my mind to no end as to why anyone would want to purposely become morbidly obese.

"The good things don’t always soften the bad things — but vice versa — the bad things don’t necessarily spoil the good things or make them unimportant."
Doctor Who Series 5: Vincent and the Doctor
SW: 232
CW: 203.2
LGW: 150
SHERYLDS Posts: 13,141
3/19/13 2:42 P

It's called mental illness...
and it should be treated like someone who is trying to commit themselves bodily harm.
You have to wonder about the people who live with these people and enable them to continue that behavior. In many ways, it's a form of euthanasia, but in slow motion. There must have been a point from which obsessive overeating became suicidal. And the people enabling them, are helping them kill themselves.

Sheryl from New Jersey, EST...2015 Spring final wt. 225
EL for 2015 Spring 5% Challenge Team Spirited Underdogs
BUNNYKICKS Posts: 2,386
3/19/13 2:42 P

Gee whiz, apparently there are TWO of them. One who made a 1000# goal while still a svelte 600 pounds, back in 2010. (Her relationship broke up and she decided she couldn't expect her kids to take care of her, so she has been losing weight now). The other made a ONE TON goal, and i think is still at it, having passed the 700# mark some time in 2012.

The things people will do in the name of their "15 minutes of fame." Just... sigh.

Goal 1 - break 200 (46 pounds lost)**DONE**
Goal 2 - leave obesity behind (BMI 29.9, at 185#) **DONE**
Goal 3 - BMI = Normal (154# or less)
MANDIETERRIER1 Posts: 14,359
3/19/13 2:32 P

I know, it is shocking. I am so unhappy at my current weight. I could not imagine wanting to weigh more

Is she the one that has an adult themed website? Or am I thinking of another?

Edited by: MANDIETERRIER1 at: 3/19/2013 (14:33)


Eat what you like and if someone comments, eat them too

My Rat Terrier has Congestive Heart Failure and other health problems. Making a purchase from
Mandies_Friends Zazzle Store helps with her medical costs
www.zazzle.com/mandies_friends+gifts

MARTYJOE Posts: 428
3/19/13 2:29 P

Then they will make a movie about how bad she has it. I just don't get it!

I_HEART_MY_FAM Posts: 1,809
3/19/13 1:25 P

I barely am watching My addiction on Netflix. I saw the lady married to man that is helping her eat her way to 1000 pounds. Sickening to know someone on purpose wants to be immobile and knowing my Mom is immobile and would love to get up and walk. My Mom's immobility is caused by having polioas a child, plus many falls suffering from epilepsy.. I know this was on here before but I barely seen it and was shocked and mortified!

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