I've been trying not to beat myself up. I know that blaming myself or using my past actions as a punching bag helps nothing, and focuses on what I did do instead of what changes I can do now.
Logic != emotional response. :/
My brain is saying one thing and the rest of me is vibrating with disappointment, despair, and self-contempt.
Fitness Minutes: (37,224)
1,416 2/2/12 10:09 A
We have all been there believe me I know. Quit beating yourself up, it is what it is. You can't undo it but you can move forward! Its ok to vent, that is a healing step. I think you know what to do- baby steps and get back on track today! No reason to wait just do it!
Fitness Minutes: (279,178)
2/2/12 10:09 A
You can't beat yourself because you regained some weight. That's something that has happened to each and everyone of us at some time in our lives. You can't change the past. BUT, you can change and influence the future. So, don't dwell in the past, look to the future !!
You've lost 25 pounds before, you can do it again. but, in truth, it will be harder this time around. Every time we gain, lose and regain the weight, our bodies become more efficient at hording fat. Now, that doesn't mean you can't lose the weight, it's just not going to come off as quick as it did in past.
You're going to need to be practical. Don't look at weight loss or good health with an all or nothing mentality. Any healthy thing you do for yourself IS a step in the right direction. Slow and easy really does win this race.
What to do ? Start with some simple changes. Don't try to do everything at once or you will end up frustrated. Make small changes. If you're not used to eating 6-9 servings of fresh fruit and veggies each and every day, then set a goal to each 2-3 servings each day for one week. if you're not used to drinking 8 glasses of water. Set a goal to drink 2-3 glasses of water each day for one week. If you haven't been exercising set a goal to walk for 30 minutes each day for one week. Once you've achieved those goals, you set new goals.
If you haven't set up your Spark nutrition profile, fill that out and start logging your food. Studies have shown that people who log their food choices lose more weight than those who don't.
Last thought, be kind to yourself as you would to others.
All the work I've done to improve my health and body went out the window in the course of a few months. I feel miserable and furious with myself for being stupid. I know better.
For two years, with a lot of stumbling blocks along the way, I dropped 25 lbs and more. Eating better, using a personal trainer, and being semi-committed to the gym all did wonders for my self-esteem and energy. I wasn't at my goal weight, but I felt better, was more active, and finally came to a detente with my body size/shape. I'm no longer that skinny 17 year old who lives in my head, but I can be a healthy, curvy woman.
Things fell apart in May (serious job woes, divorce, moving, job transfer) to December. I wasn't as active. I ate out more often and pretended I was on top of things instead of tracking my portions. Exercise became an 'if I can manage it' thing when I know I'm a procrastinator. In essence, I gained back 20 lbs in six months (!). The thought makes me want to cry.
I don't know what to do. I'm back to loathing my body and, moreover, beating myself up for being so dumb as to reverse what was good and healthy for me. What do I do?
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