Oh I so understand what you are talking about. I am going to have to sit down and seriously think about what you have said and see if I am able to not only learn from it but to put it into practice. Thank you for you post
Big wake up call that you just gave me. Similar to me, I live in the future, well, not anymore. I need to learn to love today and what I have now.
Thanks for the post!
Fitness Minutes: (938)
6 6/4/09 1:58 A
This is for LOSTALLHOPE - I tried to send you a private message but wasn't able to do it somehow. But I just had to say something when I heard you had been contemplating suicide. I'm so sorry things have felt so bad and you have felt so bad. I also have no job right now - live in California and have been unemployed for a year and a half now. I'm not on the street because of family support, but I LIVE alone and I've been down for so many reasons lately, and I just wanted you to know you're not alone in feeling desparate. I won't give you the unwanted "Don't give up advice" because I know how that can feel when you're in a dark place, or when someone really doesn't understand your pain, but I also know how feelings can change, and I try to remember mentally that the worst feelings I can have can go away. It sure doesn't feel like it when I'm feeling them. I reply partly on antidepressants. Keep reaching out even in the smallest ways. I think you must have a spark of hope just to have responded to original post. I don't know much about you, but I'm thinking of you.
This is the book about where you have arrived! Since yesterday no longer exists, and tomorrow does not exist either, the place to live is the NOW. Living in NOW makes all future and past problems disappear and if there is not a problem right now just be happy in your now. Thanks for reminding me.
One thing I love about this website is there are no giant banners telling you how easy it is or that you will never be hungry. Dieting is not easy and I do get hungry, just for now I am trying to focus out of it and drink more water till next mealtime comes around and hope that it gets easier. Hang in there.
Thank you so much for such a wonderful post. I too have focused on my health in waves as you said. And I came up will all different kinds of excuses and reasonings for the choices I made. I would always say "tomorrow I'll start eating better. Tomorrow I'll go work out" but it never happened. And now I have change my thinking and like you will only deal with and focus on today, because that's what matters.
Thank you so much for sharing! My motivation seems to come in waves too. And no matter what I tell myself when I'm at the "do-nothing-and-don't-care" plateau, it doesn't work, and I just stay at that plateau until the health wave comes again! But when you focus on the TODAY, then there's not much that you should delay, is there? Because today is all we've got. Thanks so much for inspiring me to get out of the current plateau I'm in.
Read the book by St. Alphonsus Liguori entitled "Preparation For Death" and you will realize that you are right in saying "Tomorrow no longer exists for me," for death is the one thing that we can all be certain of, however when death comes is an uncertainty. So if we are always cognizant of this fact we will never presume that a tomorrow exists. But what will exist for us after our death will either be an eternity of sorrow and woe or an eternity of everlasting life.
I have no idea why I chose to read this post. I usually delete these messages before reading them. The first thing that struck me was how articulate you are; how you completely nailed a description of so many of the days of my life; how brutally honest you are.
A long time ago, I felt happy for a couple of years. I remember that MY mantra at that time was "stay in this moment". Somehow, a husband,2 children and 40 pounds later, I have lost sight of this; lost sight of me.
Thank you so much for taking the time and making the effort to express difficult feelings and not-so-pretty images so precisely and objectively. Judging by the other posts, you have given many of us a great gift by sharing this about your own experience. Again, thank you.
I kind of wasn't really feeling this community until I read this post. Just like my sign on name after limiting my calories from 800-1200 a day but with no exercise I lost all hope and was set for suicide when I realized I only lost 4 pounds. I know I'm suppose to exercise and lose it slowly but only losting 4lbs was deflating for me. In one month I did expect to lose at least 10-12 pounds and then feel enough energy and motivation to start an exercise program. I have no motivation, at all except that I HATE MYSELF FAT. That has always worked in past but it's clearly not enough now when I find it easy to just hide away in my house especially since I lost my job. I have more time on my hands to fit exercise and a healthy lifestyle in but I'm too busy eating and complaining about not wanting to exercise and how tired I am and how much I hate life and myself for getting myself into this situation. Your post reminded me of me, but I'm sure i'm worse mentally. I get barely motivated to do barely something and when it doesn't work I give up and order a pizza. I don't know if your post motivated me enough to do better but I realize there are people out there who really do live this and understand how unexplainably hard it is to get and stay on track. It's hard being surrounded by people who "say you can do it", when clearly I can't or won't.. or "don't give up" and all the little motivating things they say when clearly they still look human and actually have even a blemish of a life. They mean well and I appreciate it but whatever. No one is trying to eat that ezekiel bread with me or that veggie bacon so it just doesn't help much. So anyway yeah, I have lost all hope, but I'm going to set out to find some again and keep trying. Thank you.
Fitness Minutes: (938)
6 6/4/09 1:41 A
Great post, Seige718. I can totally relate. I have some problems with depression and self-esteem, and after I've been through a time of getting really excited about what the future can hold, and how many many changes I want to make and lots of ideas, I can get overwhelmed and just give up try to do much of anything. Thanks for the good reminder.
WOW!!! That was very insightful.. Your outlook of only thinking about the Today not the Tomorrow, should be practiced in everything we do....
I think sometimes we spend so much time planning for the future that we forget how to live. Then all that time is gone and you can't get it back...Keep Your Chin UP and never look back at "would've, could've, should'ves... Best of Luck to You!!!!
Remember one more thing... Always be true to yourself.
Wow! I have to say, there have been so many times when I have found myself thinking the same way you did about the future, I just never realized until now that it was what was overwhelming me to basically stand still. Thank you so much for passing along your insight, I can honestly say you have made me take a good look at why I was making the choices I was making. Thank you thank you! Keep up the fantastic journey!
Sometimes its tough waking up and going through the doldrums of the day...just try to take one day at a time. Egg Beaters are a great low-cal egg-white substitute that have 60 calories per container when cooked with PAM cooking spray. Take care!
Thanx for the post- one day at time is a great way to live. i too, have realized that i would be able to "diet" when an event was looming- but have never learned to eat healthily, for the benefit of just that day. we'll see if i can learn!!!
Today is definitely what counts because tomorrow never comes! So today is what we have...what we can count on...however what we choose today will ultimately influence our tomorrows...if we are so blessed to have a tomorrow.
your post demonstrates the importance of living in the moment, and not obsessing about the future. i do the same thing you do, only my waves last a couple of days instead of a month! my excuses range from "i'm too tired to work out." to "i don't have time to cook, nor do i know how!" i don't read many of the sparkmessages i have sent to my email, but yours definitely inspired me. let's hope i can make this next wave last longer than it normally does for me! best of luck.
your story is fantastic and inspiring...thanks for sharing it! Wish you all the best. Check out the groovy song "let's live for today" by the Grass Roots, vintage 1965...who knows? Could be your new song!
I love it! I can relate to it! Sometimes what lies in the future or the future we create ourselves can be so overwhelming. It can be so overwhelming that we retreat and do nothing. Fear of failure... Live for today is a wonderful mantra.... One worth trying to cultivate. Thank you. Jo
Fitness Minutes: (5,436)
286 6/4/09 12:48 A
Hi I am glad I read this post.. it always seems to me that if I mess up on my diet(program) I would say "oh well, there's always tomorrow" But, from now on I am going to live for Today, tomorrow isn't promise to us.. Good Post, thanks for sharing!!
Thank You! I needed and enjoyed your post. I wish you the best in living for the moment,Today.
Fitness Minutes: (41,376)
775 6/4/09 12:32 A
I agree there is nothing but the "right now" because only in the "right now can I act, make decisions and be--just be. I don't know about tomorrow and yesterday is gone. Right now is where cation takes place and where I can make a difference in my life and the life of those who I care about.
Fitness Minutes: (125)
1,948 6/4/09 12:32 A
You are so right because tommorow is not promised to no one. Be the best you can be today and do your best you can do tommorow.
You have had an awesome aha-moment! Good for you. And good for the rest of us that you shared it. Thank you so much for that.
Living in the moment is key to a lot of things in life, especially staying motivated. Now you are on the right track. And I will think about you whenever I stray off to the future. You are so right, straying off puts too much pressure on the project and you lose focus.
Once again, thank you so much for sharing!!! Keep healthy and keep motivated.
Awesome post Seige! I've also spent many an hour on the sofa, stuffing my face as I watch any old fluff on TV.
What you wrote about living in the future really resonated with me. It's occurred to me many times that I've spent the past 53 years "waiting" for what's to come later. Like you, I had a light bulb moment a few years back, realizing I need to live each day for that very day itself. There is no magic "later-land." Wish I could say I've conquered my eating disorder, but it still rears its' ugly head way too often. Let's hear it for TODAY!!
Fitness Minutes: (36,248)
3,116 5/19/09 5:20 P
Edited by: PROGRESSFORWARD at: 5/19/2009 (17:40)
Fitness Minutes: (1,065)
461 5/19/09 4:31 P
Thank you for your words. I'm going to post your message where I can see it each day-I'm so much like you. Your post made me realize I can't loose 200+ pounds if I'm worried about what I did yesterday and what I'm going to do tomorrow.
Fitness Minutes: (36,248)
3,116 5/19/09 3:38 P
My motivation has always come in waves. One month I'm completely dedicated to my health and the health of people around me. I go balls out and live the way I've always wanted to live: wake up early, take the dogs for a walk, come home and make a healthy breakfast, do some chores around the house, make a nutritious lunch, play with my dogs, etc. It's those times when I'm at my best. Then the wave ends and I'm suddenly dragging my groggy @$$ out of bed late in the morning, I drag myself to the kitchen and make the quickest, least nutritious, biggest breakfast I can come up with. I take my plate to the couch and eat everything (plus seconds) while watching TV. In a fried egg coma, I remain on the couch for most of the day and most of the night, sometimes not even getting up to shower! At the back of my mind I ask myself, is this how I want to spend the rest of my life? Unfortunately, when I'm deep in my fried egg coma, the answer is always a cop-out: I just have to deal with my guilt until the "healthy" wave picks me up again so I can ride it for as long as it will carry me. Of course, the healthy wave usually lasts about a month, tops, while my unhealthy wave lasts 3 months to a year! This past weekend I got to thinking about my “healthy wave” and I suddenly realized that everything I did when I was soaring on my healthy wave was due to an obsession with the future. I would spend so much time thinking and planning for the future that I became overwhelmed by my own thoughts and eventually I would get to a point where I’d just tell myself ENOUGH! and I'd quit. So I woke up Monday morning and decided that I would stop living in the future and start living TODAY! Yesterday was the first time I told myself this mantra. Yesterday was the first time I actually understood it, believed it and practiced it. TODAY I will make the best decisions I can make with what I eat and how I workout. Tomorrow's motivation is irrelevant. Tomorrow’s motivation doesn’t exist. It's all about TODAY.
SparkPeople, SparkCoach, SparkPages, SparkPoints, SparkDiet, SparkAmerica, SparkRecipes, DailySpark, and other marks are trademarks of SparkPeople, Inc. All Rights Reserved.
SPARKPEOPLE is a registered trademark of SparkPeople, Inc. in the United States, European Union, Canada, and Australia. All rights reserved.