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MANDIETERRIER1 Posts: 17,119
4/1/14 1:54 P

I think it would be important to not obsess over food in the presence of your daughters.

When I was growing up there was a lot of obsessing. Certain foods were bad and we couldn't have them. Certain foods were labeled good. So whenever we went out and bought the "bad" food. We usually gobbled them down in one sitting. And everyone felt guilty for buying and eating the bad food.

I think it is better to mention health. My body loves it when I eat vegetables. I love what exercise does for me.

If I had kids I wouldn't want them to grow up and label food as bad and good. Continuing the shame and guilt cycle.

Edited by: MANDIETERRIER1 at: 4/1/2014 (13:54)
4/1/14 9:23 A

Good question,

My 7 year old daughter already learned from school friends this year that she's skinny, and wants to stay skinny!

I am very conscious of positive speech about my body and avoiding the word "fat"and image negativity around my kids.

I told them I wasn't eating as much sugar anymore because it doesn't make my body happy, or work as well as good healthy food does.

They love to exercise, they'll pull out my mat and dumbells, and I have to join in. They say they're getting stronger and doing it for "healthy" (their phasing). So I think my careful wording and excessive explaining of why I'm doing these things is working. I want them to think of these activities as a normal part of life, and something to be done to care for ourselves.

EELPIE Posts: 2,700
4/1/14 8:34 A

I definitively would only focus on the health aspect, not weight loss.

Do you do "clean eating" - only whole foods, or foods in their most natural state?

When I adopted that, that removed any discussion of eating a certain way for weight loss.

No one sees me reading labels to scan for calories or fat....they think I am reading for ingredient content....which I am as well, but it's no ones business that I am also counting carbs.

Plus, it removes any discussion of food choices. "No, I am not buying little debbie cakes and fritos for snacks, they are full of chemicals, and processed sugars and sodium that are simply not good for people. I am going to fill the house with apples, and popcorn and carrots with hummus for healthy, wholesome snacks".

You just need to change the focus....with the result being the same ;)

4/1/14 8:33 A

We are teaching our kids to be healthy and strong :)

DMJAKES Posts: 1,634
4/1/14 8:26 A

I agree with the others about putting the focus on "healthy" instead of "skinny". I'd also watch what you say when you see that thin model or movie star on TV, or those jeans that fit the manikin in the store like a glove. Don't plant the idea that stuff like that is something to be attained in order to be successful. Point out the different ways that "beauty" can be seen, both internally and externally.

MIFITNOW Posts: 2,658
4/1/14 8:13 A

I am slightly overweight and constantly mindful of what I eat. My girls are all very active and until recently very, very lean. Recently, one daughter had a med change that resulted in some weight gain. Most often, we as the moms are in charge of the food that enters our homes. Just by providing healthy snacks instead of unhealthy ones it can yield great benefits/results. I also encourage them to exercise their mom/dad (much like one would take a dog for a walk). emoticon

Edited by: MIFITNOW at: 4/1/2014 (08:15)
CAROLINAGIRL69 SparkPoints: (109,001)
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Posts: 2,480
4/1/14 8:05 A

My daughter is only 9. I don't focus so much on losing weight. I just tell her I'm trying to be healthy and in shape.

MICHELLEXXXX SparkPoints: (11,965)
Fitness Minutes: (5,920)
Posts: 3,705
4/1/14 7:59 A

I agree with MrsBennett.

SHERYLDS Posts: 17,176
4/1/14 7:31 A

I think a little hype about shopping for healthy foods, having fun with activities, making healthy meals together, and even exercising a great way to teach by example. And I don't think it is gender specific

LULUBELLE65 SparkPoints: (35,879)
Fitness Minutes: (27,249)
Posts: 1,102
4/1/14 4:12 A

I don't have a daughter, but pretty much my childhood memories of my mother involve her being on a diet--the rest of the family ate a pretty normal dinner, and my mother ate salad, some disgusting concoction of plain yogurt and canned french cut string beans, and skinless chicken, I think I went on my first "diet" at 12, but I never eat those string beans. : emoticon

I do think that her constant dieting, coupled with all of the articles in magazines like Family Circle and Women's Day, made me think that women were supposed to be on diets all the time--

BERRY4 SparkPoints: (252,726)
Fitness Minutes: (108,048)
Posts: 12,934
4/1/14 2:40 A

I'm fortunate that my teen daughter is somewhat open is discourse...

At one point, when I was avoiding certain foods, she said, "YOLO" (today's expression: You Only Live Once!). And I was able to at least explain, that ALL choices have consequences, whether positive or negative. I can make poor food choices and have to deal with extra weight, illness, and other side effects. Or I can choose well and feel good, have greater energy, and be able to to do the things I like to do.

MRSBENNETT2 Posts: 1,621
4/1/14 1:22 A

I agree with the "health" message! Emphasise the healthy eating and being active. I would never even mention the words diet or weight loss.

--MEOW-- Posts: 4,220
4/1/14 12:37 A

Well... I'm not a woman and I don't have any daughters but... every time my little sis asks me why I always weigh my food and stuff I just tell her it is because I'm vegan and I need to know how much protein I'm eating.
When she sees me working out I just tell her that I do that because I want to be healthier

LADYCJM SparkPoints: (57,456)
Fitness Minutes: (36,342)
Posts: 2,545
3/31/14 11:43 P

I think that the focus needs to be on being healthier.

And weight loss shouldn't be the focus of the day.

For example, when you go grocery shopping with your daughter, if you used to buy a lot of junk food and are now buying fruits and vegetables and she asks why, the answer would be too much junk food is not good for us, that it can make us sick and that every one should eat at least 5 servings of fruits and veggies per day.

If you are cutting back on fast food meals and she wants burgers and fries, you say that fast food has too much salt and fat and you want both of you to be healthier by eating better foods.

Weight never has to come up.

JANIEWWJD SparkPoints: (531,016)
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Posts: 14,703
3/31/14 11:33 P

Thank God my daughter loves to wrkout.

JO88BAKO SparkPoints: (305,097)
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Posts: 15,235
3/31/14 10:18 P

My daughter is grown and does not have a weight problem, but I'd wouldn't say anything about losing weight and explain that you are trying to lead a more healthy lifestyle so you can do more with her.

DDONOVA Posts: 27
3/31/14 9:57 P

If you are severely overweight this may not apply to you. If you are mildly overweight how do you explain to your daughters that you are losing weight (or do you) in a way that does not get them obsessed about their how weight? emoticon

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