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SLIMMERKIWI Posts: 26,041
4/24/13 6:17 P

I am sorry that you experienced this with your friend. I would be inclined to think that altho' she may have said it was because of your weight, she probably felt more able to say that rather than another probable cause. In my work as a Caregiver, I came across many people who would not keep in contact with someone because they didn't know how to deal with that person's illness - what to say .... what to do. It can confuse them, and hurt them as well, and as you well know, we all deal with things in different ways - some healthy and some unhealthy.

If you drop a healthy lifestyle, you will only set yourself up for more angst, including anger at yourself for slipping back. This is one aspect of your life that you actually CAN control, and the more you do it, the easier it becomes. Heard of the expression "Practice makes perfect" ???....... OR "If at first you don't succeed, try, try, and try again" ????

I can assure you that it DOES get easier - you just have to practice :-)

BIG hugs,

SP_COACH_NANCY SparkPoints: (0)
Fitness Minutes: (112,042)
Posts: 46,222
4/24/13 9:58 A


I wish there was an easy answer--but life is not always easy--but I have to remind myself it's not the smooth sailing in life that define me, but how I overcome the storms in life that does. Life is full of frenzy and one would think the older one gets the easier--in some ways that's true, but in many ways it is really the only way we grow--we evolve.

Be strong!

Coach Nancy

ARCHIMEDESII SparkPoints: (190,568)
Fitness Minutes: (282,853)
Posts: 26,511
4/24/13 9:58 A

Hi, Jessica !

As the old saying goes,"the journey of a thousand miles begins with the first step". You already taken your first steps towards healing yourself inside and out, but you do have to be more patient with yourself. This is a learning process. No one ever became a healthy person overnight. change takes time, thus the need to be patient with yourself and your body.

I've been working on myself these last 8-9 years and I'm still looking for ways to improve myself. Being patient has to be part of the journey if you have a long way to go.


JESSICAMONT32 SparkPoints: (0)
Fitness Minutes: (15,887)
Posts: 273
4/24/13 8:39 A

I want to quit, but I know this isn't a's a life style. Lately in therapy I have been trying to drill this into my head. Trying so so so hard that being a size two or whatever size is not going to make someone love me or prevent them from leaving my life. I read some where that that if someone can't see how great you as you are then they aren't worth having in your life. Surprisingly when I talk about people leaving it has been girlfriends of in particular that just walked away when I gained a lot weight after dealing with my cancer. It's been nearly a year and half and I think of her often and it still stings a lot but I am starting to slowly realize that it was not me with the issue but her, it didn't have do with weight( though she said it did....was angry I let myself go) this has been a struggle for me that I have been open about....I am proud and feeling strong today that I won't let the extra. Stomach flab on my belly define who iam and what iam how do I keep this confidence all the time ?

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