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BREWMASTERBILL SparkPoints: (31,088)
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2/12/11 9:07 A

Brilliant! Nice work.

MATTDEL Posts: 720
2/12/11 8:45 A

Just wanted to report back...

The wife has gotten use to it and only rolls her eyes from time to time. I found a time frame that works best, when she disappears to have a smoke and check in with her sisters...sometimes I can be done and showered and she will ask me if I skipping it for the night....

LISAWMI SparkPoints: (50,169)
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2/11/11 9:36 A

I think spouses can get insecure very easily when one partner is getting on track and the other one isn't ready for it.

BREWMASTERBILL SparkPoints: (31,088)
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Posts: 4,114
2/3/11 12:07 P

That's why I say "ignore and press on". I decided long ago that if anyone is going to stop me from being healthy, it's going to be me, dammit. hehe.

ROB2006 SparkPoints: (0)
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Posts: 1,005
2/3/11 12:02 P

BB - That theory goes through my head as well. Fatten me up so I can't go anywhere else.

If its not that then I am lost as to why they wont help.

GETNFITGUY SparkPoints: (23,650)
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Posts: 734
2/3/11 11:25 A

haha BB, same here. Women are nuts for the most part and I don't think they even know what is going through their heads at times.

You could be right though on your theory. I know when we met I was a lot "buffer" than I am now, although I'm pretty close to getting back to that.

BREWMASTERBILL SparkPoints: (31,088)
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Posts: 4,114
2/3/11 10:48 A

Ya, sounds like my house. I'd love to know what the problem is with exercising and eating right. I could never get a rational answer to the question because as you pointed out, you get "you're always gone" type responses to a 45 minute gym visit. The best I could come up with is that they feel threatened that we might make ourselves more desirable to the opposite sex. I never asked that pointed of a question though. My mouth gets me in enough trouble as it is :)

GETNFITGUY SparkPoints: (23,650)
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Posts: 734
2/3/11 10:28 A

I used to have the same problem also. My wife wasn't really vocal about it but if we argued about something else, somehow "me always going the gym" would work its way into our argument.

She would complain about me being "gone" too much (which is ridiculous because I'm only at the gym for 45 minutes out of the entire freaking day), I finally responded back to her "Well if I have a heart attack and die I'll be gone forever". Is that something you want?

I know, pretty harsh, and I kind of snapped, but the message got through. She understand that fitness and health is important to me, and with us having a daughter in 3 months, I want to make sure I'm around for both of them well through my 70's. I don't want to die when I'm 50 of a heart attack or be diagnosed with hypertension or something.

To help her with wanting me to be home after work I work out at 5am every morning. It really sucked at first and took about 2 weeks to get used to. Now I'm on my 10th straight week, and I feel great and I'm starting to wake up at 4:30am on my own.

My wife is one of those lucky people that doesn't have work out to stay 125lbs. Me on the other hand, had to work hard to get from 237 to where I am. Even if it meant putting my foot down.

BREWMASTERBILL SparkPoints: (31,088)
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Posts: 4,114
2/2/11 7:35 A

I get 0 support from the spouse and a lot of resistance. What is bizarre is that we're on the same page about just about everything else. She hates the way I eat (although I've eased up a little), and hates that I train at the house. After nearly 2 years, she's coming around a little. She sees it is important to me.

As far as her objections, I largely ignored them. There are a lot of battles I concede on, but this isn't one of them. As far as requiring support to succeed. Never needed it.

I'd say, ya, it sucks, but press on. If you can compromise something else (maybe you watch a lot of sports, so you can trade your TV time for treadmill time or something??).

MACGRAW SparkPoints: (0)
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2/1/11 1:19 P

I have the same trouble on the weekends because I like to sleep in. During the week I exercise early in the morning while everyone is sleeping so it doesn't interfere with work or family time.

TOPAHI SparkPoints: (0)
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Posts: 464
2/1/11 1:11 P

I have this happen at home a little too.
You have to try and make it a routine.
Your spouse will probably get used to your routine (even begrudgingly).
Once the weight starts to really come off she'll be on board (mostly).

I do almost all of the cooking, this really helps me stay on track with calories.
My wife seems to really appreciate it as well.

And as a hint... put that extra portion of food in the refrigerator right away.

Edited by: TOPAHI at: 2/1/2011 (13:18)
MATTDEL Posts: 720
1/31/11 6:35 P

I've always done the majority of cooking since we have been together, so I decide what we eat. She is pretty happy about that though, we are eating better these days.

We were always a one dish supper couple, which always leads to over least in my case, and I would be hungry an hour later.

ROB2006 SparkPoints: (0)
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1/31/11 2:33 P

Yes. We discuss it at home and she says she understands but then when I try to exercise and not spend time with the kids I get an ear full. Same with food and meals. Things will go good for a few days and she will make healthy meals then that goes out the window and back to eating bad. I have given up for support from home as its not going to happen.

MATTDEL Posts: 720
1/31/11 11:51 A

Anyone else struggling with support from a spouse? I get grief for "disappearing" upstairs to walk on the treadmill for 45 minutes.

At least my daughter gets it, she is very supportive and was real happy when her hands touched while giving me a hug.

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