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MOONCHILD8 Posts: 6,748
4/27/13 11:35 P

I have been there. I usually have a lived in house. I am not prefect and do not try to be for others. They have to deal with it or go. Linda from bean town

LADYCJM SparkPoints: (34,466)
Fitness Minutes: (28,168)
Posts: 1,778
4/27/13 11:17 P

LOL, I can totally relate to that!

SLIMMERKIWI SparkPoints: (137,754)
Fitness Minutes: (33,189)
Posts: 21,842
4/27/13 11:06 P

LADYCJM - I totally agree with your questions/answers :-)

AND ..........

"Last example: I'm stressed that my house is a mess and I have a big event coming up.
Worst case: It's a disaster when everyone gets here and I'm embarrassed.
What can I control? Getting off this website and cleaning my house lol."

I was 1/2 way through vacuuming a very messy and untidy house this a.m. - got visitors - felt embarrassed - shouldn't have been stuffing around last few days doing NOTHING much - LOL!

Kris


LADYCJM SparkPoints: (34,466)
Fitness Minutes: (28,168)
Posts: 1,778
4/27/13 1:52 P

When my life feels like it is going out of control I have found that it helps me to ask myself 2 questions.
First: What is the worst thing that can happen? I've found that when I think about things realistically and consciously that the worst things are not that bad ie, no one will die, I won't get fired, no loss of limb etc

If things are that bad or I'm still stressed over it I ask myself : What can I do about it or do I have any control over what is happening?

An example, my dad was very sick, he was going to die. What is the worst? He is going to die. What can I control? Nothing. What can I do? Be there for him, grieve and support my family.
I can't fix anything. It hurt like hell that I couldn't fix it but I had to accept it.

Another example, my daughter is having a melt down over school (last semester in college).
She "knows" she is going to fail a really hard math class.
What's the worst thing that can happen? She fails and has to delay graduation which will be a pain and cost more but no one dies etc.

What can I control? Nothing. I can encourage her to talk to the teacher about her concerns. And I can be supportive and let her vent and give her as hug.

BTW, she talked to the teacher, she will pass. All the drama for nothing lol!

Last example: I'm stressed that my house is a mess and I have a big event coming up.
Worst case: It's a disaster when everyone gets here and I'm embarrassed.
What can I control? Getting off this website and cleaning my house lol.

I hope things get better for you.

APPRIL Posts: 2,238
4/27/13 9:35 A

Extra vitamin B12, it is the calming vitamin.
Blueberries and dark chocolate chips mix as the comfort food.


EEJAYBEE Posts: 192
4/27/13 9:15 A

Thanks everyone- I'll let you know how I get on

TANGOKATE Posts: 365
4/23/13 8:13 P

I would keep doing one good thing for myself... water intake, veggies, whatever it is that tells me everything else is off the rails, but this I am doing. And don't forget, you know you will get back on the wagon. It just might not be as soon as you'd like.

emoticon

VELVETMERLIN Posts: 229
4/23/13 7:50 P

Is there anything you can do to keep your hands and mind busy? When I get bored or stressed and find myself starting to slip back, I try to find something to do, such as rearrange the kitchen (believe it or not, being around food and not eating actually helps me), organize your closets, read, etc.

Everyone is going to slip-up once in a while and it's actually a good thing that you are taking notice of your habits. Just keep saying to yourself 'I have come way too far to go back to where I was'.

SLIMMERKIWI SparkPoints: (137,754)
Fitness Minutes: (33,189)
Posts: 21,842
4/23/13 7:14 P

Here are a couple links that may be helpful:

www.sparkpeople.com/resource/wellness_arti
cles.asp?id=693


www.sparkpeople.com/myspark/stage_diet_str
ategies.asp?diet_stage=3&strategy_num=
5


I hope that you are able to get back to normality very soon.

Take care,
Kris

ARCHIMEDESII SparkPoints: (142,817)
Fitness Minutes: (213,690)
Posts: 20,963
4/23/13 3:12 P

EEJAYBEE,

I'm a firm believer that stress is a neglected aspect of weight gain. If a person can reduce their stress, they'd automatically reduce their waistline. In short, there are better ways to vent your stress that don't involve food. When you feel an urge to run to the frig, put on your coat and take a walk. If you don't want to go outside, put on some relaxing music. take a long hot shower. go to the gym and take a kick boxing class. BLOG. writing out your feelings can be more cathartic than eating a row of Girl Scout cookies.

Don't beat yourself up because you're not perfect. Instead, try to be mindful of your portion sizes. try to eat more fresh fruit and veggies instead of the treats, try to get some regular exercise, mostly try to reduce your stress.

Have you ever considered taking a yoga class ? If not, there are wonderful yoga instructors who can teach you how to meditate. there have been many studies that have shown that meditation can help reduce a person's heart rate and stress.

Take things one day at a time, you're worrying too much about too many things at once. Pick one thing at a time so that you don't feel so overwhelmed. I know that won't be easy, but prioritizing will help you stay away from the kitchen.

emoticon

EEJAYBEE Posts: 192
4/23/13 3:04 P

I've got a really stressful situation going on at the moment in my extended family...which is making me eat more (have always been an emotional eater but it has been Sooo much better in the last year). I am conscious that I am falling back into old habits (too much bread, butter and jam, ice cream etc). Hopefully in 3 weeks or so the situation should be improving. In the meantime, what should I do to still feel in control when I know I will struggle to manage a diet right now? Would you go back up to 2000 cal/day and just "have a break" for a few weeks? I know exercise would help, but I'm short on time at the moment, too. I really don't want to undo all the progress I've made over the last year or so.
Thanks

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